Sex: Male

Race: Caucasian

"Names": Fuck my real name. Call me Jaykob. Or Snowe, after my fancharacter.

Age: I'm not about to tell you... unless I trust you dearly, that is.

Sexuality: I am homosexual, and proud to say it. Got a problem with it? Go fuck yourself with a knife.

Relationship status: Single. And looking. But I'm not open to long-distance. Sorry, bitches.

My interests: music (preferably rock, metal, some pop), art, mental sciences, reading and writing, culinary arts (cooking, for stupid people out there :P)

Things I am unfond of: Southern accents, my area of residence, boiled vegetables, those who call themselves "popular", and, I won't lie, myself sometimes.

Bands that I am in love with: The Acadamy Is..., AFI, Atreyu, Breaking Benjamin, Evanescence, Fall Out Boy, Florence + the Machine, Green Day, Linkin Park, Katy Perry, The Killers, Lady Gaga, Lily Allen, Mindless Self Indulgence, Muse, My Chemical Romance, Panic! at the Disco, Radiohead, Say Anything, System of a Down, Taking Back Sunday, The Used

My favorite song: "Disaster" by The Used

Zodiac sign: Taurus

Birthday: April 30th

About my Avatar: I didn't draw that. I wish I could draw something so beautiful. *sigh*

"Pepsi-or-Coke" Questions:

Pepsi or Coke? Pepsi. No Question.

Chocolate or Vanilla? Hm... Vanilla, I guess, but only by a little bit.

Soda or Water? Soda. Water's good and healthy, but... I love the sugary shit.

Black or White? I can't decide. I like black better, but when I'm feeling paranoid (which is far too often for my liking), brighter colors are comforting.

Pool or Ocean? Pool. I love the diversity of the ocean, but I'm paranoid, and sharks and gigantic jellyfish and huge whales... yeah. You know where I'm going with this.

Cats or Dogs? Cats. They're adorable, and besides, I'm a feline myself. *wink*

Reality or Dreams? Dreams. Suffering isn't just something I write about.

Books or Movies? Books. Unless I'm feeling terribly lazy.

Shakespearean Theater or Movie Theater? Shakespearean. The theatre was created for live entertainment, not recorded nonsense. Sure, movies are fine, but I prefer the original beauty of drama theatre.

Emoticons or Textspeak? Emoticons. I like to be complicated and actually write out words, but sometimes it's hard to show my actual emotion about the topic without those little smiley-faces.

Phone or Computer? Computer. E-mail could replace text messaging, I suppose. That's all I use a cellular phone for, anyway.

Vampires or Werewolves? Psh. Like I care. Rabid Twilight fangirls somehow ruined that for me, and I can tell you that that is a rare occurance. I'm usually a part of that screaming mob obsessed with whatever.

Yaoi or Shounen-ai? Shounen-ai. I'm too much of a romantic for yaoi to be my favorite. I like both. I just like shounen-ai better.

Updates!!!!

6/13/2011: Hooray for all you perverts! My "purpledemon21" account is active again! And, yes, that means that those two stories I left unfinished will be continued! YAY! Anyways, enjoy that news. 'Cause it'll be a bit before the next update to either one is finished. I've got to get back into the swing of things, y'know? Anyways, you're welcome. :)

6/14/2011: I have begun writing a book. I know I've told you that before, then it never happened, but this time it will be different. I'm really confident here. I really want this published. Of course, I'm paranoid when it comes to anything, especially identity theft, so even when I'm finished with it, I probably won't send it to a publisher right away. When I do send it to a publisher, I'll probably use a fake name. I probably won't even add much, if any, information about myself in that "about the author" section that is added to the end of most books. Point is, I'm terribly paranoid and will not allow my identity to be stolen. Enough said.

6/14/2011, a bit later in the day: I need help from my awesome fans! I don't know how to continue The Hero of the Hero! Anyone who would like to and can, PLEASE shoot me a private message with ideas! I will definitely credit you if I use your idea, and even if I don't use it, I really appreciate it! Please! I need help!

6/23/2011: I've finally gotten an idea to continue, no thanks to my fans. :p It's alright, though. I'm not mad or anything, at most I'm slightly peeved that no one answered my distress call. Anyways, upcoming chapter will contain a new fancharacter. Yaaaaaay! I need to make more of those XD Anyways, you're welcome, and no "thank you"s to you people. Meh.

8/12/2011: Okay, well, if you've been keeping track of me, which I doubt any of you have, you know that I have discovered that I am not bisexual, but homosexual. Yep, I'm a full-blown faggot. SUCK IT, BITCHES. Anyways, that also means that I no longer have a girlfriend. And so "The Hero of the Hero" is... rather awkward for me. It makes me feel sad. So I've decided to delete it. I'm sorry, peoplez, but you must understand. Thank you if you DO understand. And if you don't... go fuck yourself. Kidding. Byebye.

12/21/2011: Okay, FIRST OFF, I apologize for how long I went without even touching this website. I'll be honest, I wasn't thinking about it. I haven't even been writing... I don't like that. So that brings me to my second thing. To get back into the swing of things, I'll be writing a sexy Christmasy oneshot on the other account. Snowadow, fuckahs! :3 Anyways, the final portion of this, Happy Birthday Snowe! That's right, the supposed end of the world (if I'm not mistaken) for next year is Snowe's birthday. He is now twenty-two in my book. :p Anyways, Merry Christmas :D Yum. XD

4/6/2012: MOTHERFUCKING PIECE OF SHIT BITCH ASS COMPUTER. Decided to stop working CHRISTMAS FUCKING EVE. God DAMN I hate it. Well now I'm in the middle of completing it. I don't know if I should post it tonight though... It'd be weird. But eh. I probably will. It'll be on purpledemon21. So enjoy.

Favorite Quotes

"Knowing nothing is better than knowing it all." ~On My Own, The Used

"I don't love you, I'm just passing the time." ~She Had the world, Panic! at the Disco

"This is how we'll stand when they burn our houses down." ~Let the Flames Begin, Paramore

"Drop the dagger and lather the blood on your hands, Romeo!" ~The Sharpest Lives, My Chemical Romance

"Sick and sad patients on first name basis with all the top physicians." ~Nails for Breakfast, Tacks for Snacks; Panic! at the Disco

"You need him? I could be him! I could be an accident, but I'm still trying, and that's more than I can say for him." ~Grand Theft Autumn/Where is Your Boy, Fall Out Boy

"Put him in the back of a squad car! Restrain that man! He needs his head put through a CAT scan!" ~Disloyal Order of Water Buffaloes, Fall Out Boy

"If home is where the heart is, then we're all just fucked." ~27, Fall Out Boy

"I like to think of our situation as the beginning of a fairy tale. Before too long, we'll have our 'happily ever after'. It might take just a little bit more suffering, a bit more woe, a bit more torture, but it will come to us, and the torture, the suffering, the sadness, it will all be worth it." ~Mephiles, Chapter 1 of Perfection

Here's a fun little survey... Why don't you do it? It's fun.

1. Your name: Snowe Joseph White (I'll fill out this as if I'm Snowe.)

2. Your Nobody Name (Take all of the letters of your name, mix them around, and add an X where you find appropriate.): Xoswen

3. Your "Gangsta" Name (use the tirst three letters of your name, in order, and add "izzle" to the end): Snoizzle

4. Your Detective Name (Your favorite color and your favorite animal): Purple Dolphin

5. Your Soap Opera Name (Your middle name and the street that you live on): Joseph Avenue 8

6. Your Star Wars Name (The first three letters of your last name and the first two of your first name): Whisn (This... This makes no sense...)

7. Your Super Hero Name (Second favorite color and your favorite drink): Black Coffee

8. Your Witness Protection Program Name (The middle names of your two parents): Aaron Elizabeth

9. Your Goth Name (Black plus the name of a pet): Black Muffin

This is a survey to find what music goes with your life story as a movie. To take it, put your iPod on shuffle and place the songs which come up IN ORDER on the appropriate tag. Please, I ask that you not lie; the survey is supposed to be for fun. If you mix things up, it won't be as fun for other people. So, keep in mind, no matter HOW unfitting the selection may be, DO NOT change it. Please. Anyways, here are my results:

Opening Credits: "Baby, I Got Your Money" by Say Anything (Does NOT fit. But it's hilarious anyway :D)

Waking Up: "Invincible" by Muse (Unfitting, but a good song.)

First Day of School: "Seed" by Sublime (Don't know what to say about this one.)

Falling in Love: "The Best of Me" by The Used (No, this is more of a song for the end of a relationship, not the beginning of it...)

In a Fight: "Cut Up Angels" by The Used (Yay, two songs by one of my two favorite bands in a row :D This could work if the fight were between myself and a romantic partner.)

Breaking Up: "Sleep" by My Chemical Romance (Yep. Could work.)

Driving: "Spin" by Taking Back Sunday (Love these guys :D But I have no idea what I'd be doing alongside driving, so I cannot judge this one.)

Flashback: "Admit it!!!" by Say Anything (It is possible for it to work.)

Mental Breakdown: "All We Have is Now" by The Flaming Lips (Maybe.)

Getting Back Together: "Boyz in Da Hood", Cover Song by Dynamite Hack (Finally, one of my three hundred covers! I honestly wouldn't be surprised if that right there wasn't an exaggeration! Anyways, no, it doesn't work.)

Wedding: "Sci Fi Lullaby" by Silversun Pickups (Nah... Though these guys are awesome :D)

Birth of a Child: "We Are Rockstars" by Does It Offend You, Yeah? (If it were some kind of robotic baby, then sure, go on right ahead XD Oh, techno rock...)

Final Battle: "Empty With You [Acoustic] (Bonus Track)" by The Used (Aw. Doesn't work. But I love this song and it makes me cry :p)

Death: "One Step Closer" by Linkin Park (Sure, yeah, us this one! Love this choice!)

Funeral: "Creep", Cover Song by Korn (:D Lurves it! I don't even care that it doesn't fit! I be cryin' with happiness and because of the song now!)

Ending Credits: "Number Five With a Bullet" by Taking Back Sunday (I don't care if it fits or not :D I love it! Oh, TBS...!)

Alrighty, so that was it. The list of music for a movie based on my life... I'm surprised at how many of these came up that fit. Well, anyways, why don't you try it out? It's really fun... This is the third time I've taken the survey... it was interesting all times. :P

COPY-AND-PASTERZ!

A thirsty, African-American man crossed the street to get a drink of water from the only fountain in sight.

A white man came over to him and said, "Colored people are not allowed here."

The black man turned around.

He then said:

"Listen sir...when I was born, I was BLACK. When I grew up, I was BLACK. When I'm sick, I'm BLACK. When I go in the sun, I'm BLACK. When I'm cold, I'm BLACK. When I die I'll be BLACK.

"But you, sir? When you're born, you're PINK. When you grow up, you're WHITE. When you're sick, you're GREEN. When you go in the sun, you turn RED. When you're cold, you turn BLUE. When you die, you'll turn PURPLE. How dare you call me colored?"

The black man then returned to the fountain and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism!

Courage is the resistance of fear, mastery of fear; not the absence of fear.

When their time is up and they're pleading for someone to help, I'll stand above them and whisper, "...No."

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every second of it!

Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die tomorrow.

If you're flippin' crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever ran into a door, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid and obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If your friends are always telling you to shut up, but you don't, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If your friends are considering torturing you to make you stop talking about a fictional character, copy and paste this onto your profile. (SHADOW THE HEDGEHOG, BITCHES!!!!!!)

If you have ever had a paper cut and sucked on the blood, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you are extremely obsessed with British boys and their accents, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are obsessed with Fanfiction, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If people think you're mentally insane, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think it would be absolutely awesome if you were mentally insane, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are in love with a fictional character, copy and paste this onto your profile. (love you Shadz!)

If you have ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have read fanfictions until at least five a.m., copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you like being random, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you like reading or writing anything, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, so weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile! (I would be proud of being weird even if it wasn't good!)

92 percent of American teenagers would die if Ambercrombie and Fitch said that breathing wasn't cool. Copy and paste this onto your profile if you would be one of the 8 percent laughing your ass off.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said "pull" on it, or vice versa, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimieKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, That Bloody Demon, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienel, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minomoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy The Mary-Sue Slayer, Random Little Writer, SamanthaFantasyFan, EdwardAddict, Supergirrl, Elemental-ANimal, Mother Nature's Daughter, Hikuya, Briar Elwood, Megan Cooper, xxTunstall Chickxx, PoisionedRoses, Krystaltopaz23, Bella Cullen-Luckier Than You, purpledemon21/Purple Snowe,

If you are weird, insane, crazy, abnormal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random, or anything similar, copy and past this onto your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are hyper, like being hyper, and are always hyper, COPY AND PASTE THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE! NOW, BITCHES! BEFORE THE SQUIRRELS COME TO YOUR HOUSE WITH A SEARCH WARRANT!

If you absolutely HATE obnoxious, snobby people, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have inside jokes with yourself and only yourself copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you were insane, crazy, and/or random, before being crazy, insane, and/or random was cool, copy and paste this into your profile. (I thought it was always cool...)

If you have ever run into a tree, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever purposefully run into a tree, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you want to sue, fire, set fire to, and/or kill the weatherpeople for giving you false hope so many times, copy and paste this onto your profile so we know who to call when we lead a mob ;) (the time is near, my little piggies... LOL)

If you believe preps travel in packs, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you don't dance to avoid injury to yourself or others, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever tripped while walking up stairs, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you read people's profiles just to see if there's anything you can copy and paste onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever ducked when you walked under something that is already a mile above your head (sarcastically), copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have no problem with homosexuality, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever been standing up and suddenly fell down with no cause, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you get wonderful grades and yet know nothing, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Ninety-eight percent of teenagers have tried smoking marijuana. If you are one of the two percent that hasn't, and you hope you never will, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever forgotten your own name, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever forgotten your own phone number, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever gone for months without checking your email, and then came back to find more than a hundred of them, copy and paste this onto your profile. (I got up to flippin' FOUR HUNDRED AND FIFTY FOUR!)

If you have ever laughed during a part in a movie that wasn't funny, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you tend to talk to yourself, and enjoy your own company, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever slapped yourself for no reason, copy and paste this onto yur profile.

If you have ever gotten so sidetracked in a conversation that both sides ended up forgetting why the conversation started, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you could easily finish an entire novel in mere hours (including author's notes, prologues, epilogues, footnotes, etc.) copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you take pride in how much you scare people, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you love scaring people but don't enjoy getting scared, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you enjoy the books in the Twilight Saga, but hate the movies, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you are Team Edward Cullen, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

I am: A Dramatic Uke!

Intense, untrusting, and with a flair for dark drama, the Dramatic Uke experiences the world on a different level than most. Creative and deep feeling, they are experts at human emotion, and can see right through to your real motives and weakness. However, they are ruled by their own thoughts and emotions, sometimes too much. As they cannot escape the darkness within their soul, they find themselves drawing in the Sadistic Seme - the only one who can make them forget...

Take the quiz for yourself!

What a Boyfriend SHOULD do:
When he walks away from you, angry, follow him.
When he stares at your mouth, kiss him.
When he pushes you or hits you, grab him and don't let go.
When he starts cussing at you, kiss him and tell him you love him.
When he's quiet, ask him what's wrong.
When he ignores you, give him your attention.
When he pulls away, pull him back.
When you see him at his worst, tell him he's beautiful
When you see him start crying, just hold him and don't say a word
When you see him walking, sneak up and hug him around the waist from behind
When he's scared, protect him
When he lays his head on your shoulder, tilt his head up and kiss him
When he steals your favorite hat, let him keep it and sleep with it for a night
When he teases you, tease him back and make him laugh
When he doesn't answer for a long time, reassure him that everything is okay
When he looks at you with doubt, back yourself up
When he says that he likes you, know he really does more than you could understand
When he grabs at your hands, hold his and play with his fingers
When he bumps into you, bump into him back and make him laugh
When he tells you a secret, keep it safe and untold
When he looks into your eyes, don't look away until he does
When he misses you, surprise him by showing up on his doorstep
Stay on the phone with him even if he's not saying anything.
When he's mad, hug him tight and don't let go
When he says he's okay, don't believe it, talk with him- because 10 years later he'll remember you
Call him at 12:00am on his birthday to tell him you love him
Call him before you sleep and after you wake up
Treat him like he's all that matters to you.
Tease him and let him tease you back
Stay up all night with him when he's sick
Watch his favorite movie with him or his favorite show even if you think it's stupid
Give him the world
Let him wear your clothes
When he's bored and sad, hang out with him
Let him know he's important
Kiss him in the pouring rain
When he runs up to you crying, the first thing you say is: "Whose ass am I kicking, babe?"

Be Against Abortion!
Month One
Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.
Month Two
Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.
Month Three
You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.
Month Four
Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.
Month Five
You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?
Month Six
I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!
Month Seven
Mommy
I am okay.
I am in our Night Mother's arms.
She is holding me.
She told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?
Every Abortion Is Just...
One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.
If you're against abortion, re-post this!

For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz.
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell. (And that
I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants. (I BEG your pardon! I am not some sex-crazed asshole like most of the guys out there!)
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore.
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A TAKEN MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals.
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE/HAD STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player. (One word: gay. :p)
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO. (True, but a stupid stereotype.)
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse.
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, So I must be gay. (Eh, it's true. I'm gay and I like wearing skirts -w-)
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL/FANGUY so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker. (It's true. I stare at Shadow pictures all the time. *eyes glaze over as I think of it*)
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep.
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear skirts.
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE. (By the way, I'll probably always be a teenager at heart, so this might be here for a while.)
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy.
I have (a) FAN CHARACTER(S), so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT online with guys, so I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan.
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion.
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY. (It's true.)
I love YURI and I'M A GIRL, so I MUST be a LESBIAN.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s.
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times.
I'm ADDICTED TO FACEBOOK so I MUST get a ton of attention.
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak. (Marching band is really fun! You wouldn't think it was dorky if you ever tried it, you assholes!)
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist. (I'm not overcontrolling at all!)
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake.
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems. (And sometimes I am having problems, so fuck off.)
I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist!
I am a guy and have LONG HAIR, so I must be GAY.
I am a girl and have SHORT HAIR, so I must be a LESBIAN.
I listen to ROCK MUSIC, so I must HATE EVERYONE ELSE.
I listen to POP MUSIC, so I must be a WHORE.
I listen to RAP, R&B, and/or HIP-HOP, so I must be BLACK.
I like COUNTRY MUSIC, so I must WEAR A STRAW HAT AND PLANT CORN.
I like TECHNO MUSIC, so I must be a FREAK WITH NO LIFE OUTSIDE THE COMPUTER.
I like HEAVY METAL MUSIC, so I must HAVE A LOT OF PEIRCINGS AND WEAR BLACK EVERYWHERE I GO.
I like CLASSICAL MUSIC, so I must be an OLD-FASHIONED FUCK.
I like to act INSANE, so I must be JUVENILE.
I am IN LOVE with a FICTIONAL CHARACTER, so I must HAVE NO LIFE.

FRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when she rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask her, "It's because you’re a lesbian, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when she/he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him/her up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumbass?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince(ss).

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him/her and brings him/her to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.

BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run bitch run!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Help themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa by GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying "DAMN! We messed up! But that sure as hell was FUN!”

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Won't tell everyone else you cried... just laugh about it with you in private when you're not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.

BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story.

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowd's ass that left you.

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.

BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.

BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college.

BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Would ignore this.

BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this crap!

I LOVE MY BEST FRIENDS!!

How to Tell if You're a Writer

-If you talk to yourself. (Check)
-If you talk to yourself about talking to yourself (i.e. ‘I wonder why I talk to myself so much?’) (Check)
-If, when you talk to yourself, you sometimes speak as if talking to another person (i.e. ‘Okay, so have you ever noticed that the word ‘deliver’ could mean removing someone’s liver?’) (Check)
-If, after uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand in awe and say, ‘Wow, this is good stuff for sugar highs!’ (HELL YEAH, CHECK!)
-If you live off of sugar and caffeine. (BIG, FAT, DAZZLING CHECK!)
-If people start to notice that you tend to check your e-mail every day for a week, then suddenly disappear off the face of the planet. (Not check.)
-If your e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random. (Sometimes check...)
-If, when replying to someone else’s e-mail, you are sometimes so random that you fail to address the original message altogether. (Yeah...)
-If you tend to collect the Bic Stics people leave lying around, kind of like picking pennies off the ground. (Not check... what the hell are Bic Stics anyways?)
-If, no matter where you are in your room, you never have to so much as get up to reach a pen/pencil and paper. (Pretty much, yeah...)
-If the letters are starting to wear off on the keys of your keyboard. (No.)
-If people think you might have A.D.D. (Check.)
-If you think it’d be cool to have A.D.D. (Check... heehee!)
-If you start constantly talking in third person, past tense. (Not check, unfortunately. But I do think of my life as a book, constantly repeating what I just did in my head in vivid detail like I was writing an autobiography!)
-If you think about making lists like this, and start giggling for no ‘apparent’ reason. (Check!!)
-If your friends don’t even bother to look funny at you anymore when you start giggling for no apparent reason. (Oh, hell yes, check!)
-And finally, the number one way to tell if you’re a good writer: If you failed English 101. (Sorry, not a check.)

My name is Tiffany
I am three,
My eyes are swollen
I cannot see,
I must be stupid
I must be bad,
What else could have made
My daddy so mad?
I wish I were better
I wish I weren’t ugly,
Then maybe my mommy
Would still want to hug me.
I can’t do a wrong
I can’t speak at all
Or else im locked up
All day long.
When im awake im all alone
The house is dark
My folks aren’t home
When my mommy does come home
I'll try and be nice,
So maybe ill just get
One whipping tonight.
I just heard a car
My daddy is back
From Charlie’s bar.
I hear him curse
My name is called
I press myself
Against the wall
I try to hide
From his evil eyes
I’m so afraid now
I’m starting to cry
He finds me weeping
Calls me ugly words,
He says its my fault
He suffers at work.
He slaps and hits me
And yells at me more,
I finally get free
And run to the door
He’s already locked it
And i start to bawl,
He takes me and throws me
Against the hard wall
I fall to the floor
With my bones nearly broken,
And my daddy continues
With more bad words spoken,
"I’m sorry!", I scream
But its now much too late
His face has been twisted
Into a unimaginable shape
The hurt and the pain
Again and again
O please God, have mercy!
O please let it end!
And he finally stops
And heads for the door
While i lay there motionless
Sprawled on the floor
My name is tiffany
I am three,
Tonight my daddy
Murdered me
And you can help
Sickens me top the soul,
And if you read this
and don’t pass it on
I pray for your forgiveness
Because you would have to be
One heartless person
To not be effected
By this Poem
And because you are effected,
Do something about it!
So all i ask you to do
Is pass this on!
IF YOU ARE AGAINST CHILD ABUSE
Please pass it on.

I'm Sorry

I'm sorry
that I bought you roses to tell you that I like you.

I'm sorry
That I was raised with respect and wouldn't sleep with you when you were drunk.

I'm sorry
That I'm not physically perfect like I'm sure you would like.

I'm sorry
that I open your car door, and pull out your chair like a damn gentleman.

I'm sorry
That I'm not as pretty as you would like.

I'm sorry
That I am not some self-centered ass.

I'm sorry
I don't have a huge amount of money to give you everything you like.

I'm sorry
that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.

I'm sorry
I like to spend quality nights at home cuddling instead of getting drunk at a nightclub.

I'm sorry
I would rather make love to you than just fuck you like some random idiot.

I'm sorry
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.

I'm sorry
That I am always the one to consult when you're troubled, but will never be good enough for you.

I'm sorry
That I always held your hair back when you threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car, but when we went out you went home with another man.

I'm sorry
that I caught your boyfriend with someone else and told you. I thought that was what friends are for.

I'm sorry
That I was there at 4 A.M. to take you home when your boyfriend broke up with you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere.

I'm sorry
that I stopped being there when you needed me because it really hurt to be used as a cushion only to be thrown aside when some other dick comes into play.

I'm sorry
that I stopped answering your calls because I needed some sleep and didn't feel like being used again.

I'm sorry
that you can't understand that I'm who you should be with.

I'm sorry
That you can't accept me for myself.

I'm sorry
that I'm unable to do anything right.

I'm sorry
that nothing I do is good enough for you.

I'm sorry
That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.

I'm sorry
that I cared.

But most of all, I'm sorry
that I can't care anymore.
That I don't want to listen anymore.
That I'm done trying to make it better for you.
That I'll never be there for you again.
That I've given up.

People are always complaining about their miserable love lives, complaining to their friends about it, who are sitting there and listening, trying with all their heart to cheer that sad person up, while in their mind, they are screaming like hell, wanting so badly for their friend to look them in the eyes, to allow their friend a meaningful hug, to give that friend their own chance at love. Sometimes, when you're miserable, you just need to look at who you're talking to about it. Maybe they're your solution. Maybe they're your soul mate, who you should be dating instead of the ass who put you in such a state of ill-being. Don't wait too long; they might give up on you if you do.

If you agree with this, copy and paste it onto your profile.

Alright, peepz. So, if you want to read other stories by me which contain extremely graphic sexual themes (you lucky perverts, you), look for "purpledemon21". Anyways, that was me. I love you all... unless you're review arsonists. If you leave all-out flames on my stories, I will either scowl darkly at the computer as I delete it (if that is possible), or I will simply leave it there to allow those who wish to tell you off their chance of doing as they wish.

Have a nice day. Oh, and thank you very much for taking such a gigantic chunk of time out of your life to read all of this shit... if you did, that is.

~Snowe