Human AU. What starts out as a normal Friday night for the "Bad Touch Trio" soon becomes an opportunity for Francis to use his favorite word in reference to his best friends. Unfortunately, Gilbert and Antonio couldn't possibly have fallen for people who would return their feelings easily, but Francis is determined to help them out despite his own relationship-or lack thereof.

Ludwig Beilschmidt, a German immigrant in New York, living under the roof of your typical lower class American family, the Jones', makes a bit of cash on the side with common detective work. Finding lost pets, lost jewelry, those sorts of things. Amelia apparently has other ideas when she brings in Arlovskaya...and a murder case. Could Feliciano Vargas really be responsible?

Arthur Kirkland knows there's nothing wrong with his friend Ivan Braginskis weight, but he'd been told he's bias, especially since his ex Alfred was a big boy too, until Francis came along and stole him. As Arthur and Ivan grow closer, it becomes clear that Alfred and Francis aren't done with Arthur yet. Human AU, one and done.