Ha! You have fallen into my trap! Now that you are here, you can never Leave! Mwah ha ha! Wait, what are you doing?! No, don't you dare close the web page! Noooooooo! I am defeated!

Here's something random I thought up while I was supposed to be working:

What is real? Genuine, existing, not artificial. But what does that truly mean? How do we seperate between what is real and what is fake?

A table, solid and sturdy, made of polished oak, the wood taken on a shiny glean from the varnish. Most would say that it is real. And they'd be right, as far as we know. But, what about the concept of a table? Is that real?

Can ideas be considered real? Opinions, thoughts, beliefs, emotions, even colours? Can something intangable, something that can't be touched, felt or seen, be real? Does the mere fact that they can be experienced and considered make them real? Is the mind a real thing? If it isn't, then what is it? It exists, but does that make it real?

If we accept that the mind does exist, what of its products? When someone sees something, hears something, that no one else can experience, is it real? Some would say it is just a figment of the imagination (another thing with a questionable status of real or not) while others would say it is real to them.

But if something is real for one person, why isn't it real for others?

Take stories, for instance. Works of fiction created for entertainment, written in heavy tomes and carried in the memories of its audience. Is a story real? If thoughts are real and stories are thoughts and stories are of different worlds both similar and vastly different from our own, does that mean each time a story is thought up, a whole new world is created, made real? Or were they always real and that is why we are able to come up with them?

Well, that was fun. Did your brain just explode? Because that was my goal. Now let's see some of the things my characters have said...

Sol

"Hold on. My face has been smashed against this floor a dozen times. There are no imperfections."

"Normal is boring. The search for normal is what fills people with regret, destroys dreams, leaves people wishing for more and wondering just what they did with their life. I'm weird, I'm flawed, I'm certifiably insane, and I'm proud of it."

"So we're all in agreement, then. Let's go bite the hook like good fish and risk our lives for an inflatable toy!"

"A rose by any other name is still a man-purse."

"'You're probably just tired' is code for 'you're delusional but I'm giving you an exit'."

"A bit odd- you know what, never mind. You win. But just so you know, if we get sacrificed in some cult ritual, I'm blaming you."

"Yur such a good friend! I looove you! I'm sssooorry I missed yur baseball game."

"Unless you're planning on whacking her over the head and dragging her inside, we have no control over it."

"You. Better not. Have. RABIES!"

"Oh, the classic story of star crossed bros, never able to fist bump in public for fear of society's judgement."

"I know I'm annoying, but most people last at least a day before trying to kill me."

"Eevee, this is probably the only chance I will ever have to be a knight about to try and impale someone for fun. Don't ruin it for me."

"Death threats already? You're breaking the pattern. It goes subtle insults, overt insults, threats of bodily harm, and then death threats."

"So I should avoid the big cloud of death, then."

"Well according to paragraph seven, sentence three, word eight of the Geneva Convention, 'the'. So bite me."

"Gnarl, shut up. I'm trying to mutter insults behind your back, and your disembodied voice is very distracting."

Jak

"BURN!"

"Organ's don't speak. You can go and get yourselves killed. Jak will wait here until this one feels enough time has passed to be sure that you are dead."

"Jak just shoots fire into the sky. If that doesn't work, Jak shoots fire into the crowd. They learn to leave this one alone."

"Jak is bored. If invitation is real, then Jak might have fun. If the invitation is a trap, then Jak will have even more fun burning everything down."

Dhiren

"What are words but noise carried on the wind? Even if one coats them with venom they can do no harm if they are denied entry."

"Violence can hurt the perpetrator as much as the victim. Physical harm fades with time, but how does one heal a soul?"

"The only thing harder than accepting another's help is asking for it. But pride must give way to reason. The desert is an unforgiving place, and you will need a guide."

"The difference between stupid action and brave action is that one is done for a fickle cause, the other for a noble cause. The twisting threads of your fate has led you here, and it would appear that I have become entangled. I shall fear not the darkness when purpose is my light."

"Lashing storms and shrouded nights breed fear. Fear in turn breeds hysteria. A calm mind can weather the tumultuous and chaotic, while the hysteric crumble and prove to be their own undoing."

"What the Hell?! Holy shit!"

Eevee

"Just, wow. I can't believe I'm really talking to you right now! Or am I? Is this a dream? It better not be a dream! Sol, pinch me!"

"Sol! One does not talk to the great Dusknoir in that way! I am so sorry, Dusknoir, sir! Please forgive her! She doesn't understand the concept of manners!"

Wigglytuff

"Hide in the gift shop. The flying mutant gnomes are allergic to postcards..."

"Hide me! I formally request sanctuary."

"I like exploring, he likes 'structure' and 'organization' and 'sucking all the fun out of everything'. So, we built the guild!"

"I happily skipped over, unaware of the impending tragedy, took a big bite, then... BAM!! Mouthful of disgusting!"

"IT'S A TRAP!"

Gnarl

"A four syllable word, Sol? Be careful not to strain your little brain overly much."

"You sound nervous. Scared of what you might find at the Castle? Do you need someone to hold your hand?"

"Just what were you doing? Getting drunk at some tavern instead of doing your job, I bet. We thought you'd been killed. It's rather disappointing to see you here alive."

Rose

"Men. Can't destroy anything without making a mess. Like that business down in Spree. You couldn't just make an example out of some, no, you had to burn down half the village. Now things are going to get disorganized."

"I do believe, Sol, that you managed to tell me nothing while telling me much."

Six

"Well you don't seem to be understanding English, so I thought I'd try switching to French. I don't know. Je. Ne. Sais. Pas."

"And that's my inspiring tale of adventure. Already sold the movie rights."

"What? I'm just borrowing it. If I recall correctly, you're the thief here."

"I'll try to keep the stupid down to a minimum."

"Hey, stop calling me ‘little girl’. I prefer the term ‘miniscule female’."

Loosum

"Yeah, but it could have just as easily ended with a bullet in your kneecap."

"Another thing that needs to stay our little secret. They shouldn't leave things just laying around where anyone can take them."