I was Born to be a Slytherin and I know it. Slytherin is probably my favorite house I love reading Fanfic based around Slytherin characters especially Draco Love Fics.

Have you ever had someone tell you something really obvious if you have copy and paste this at the on your profile.

Funny Phrases:

Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Did you know...Sarcasm is your body's natural defense against stupidity.

Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer and then have them read about wars in school that solved the World's problems?

364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to take candy from strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is that?

Parents spend the first parts of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Boys are like trees- they take 50 years to grow up.

Put the CHOCOLATE in the bag and no one gets hurt.

Never take life seriously.Nobody gets out alive anyway.

Hard work never killed anybody,but why take a chance.

Note to self: Normal is just a setting on washer machines.

Being weird is like being normal, only better.

I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me.

Labels are for cans, and in case you haven't noticed, I'm not a can!

One out of four people are insane. Look at three of your friends. If it's not them, it's you.

They say, "Guns don't kill people. People kill people." Well, I think the gun helps. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

I live in my own little world. But it's okay, they know me there.

I used to be normal... until I met those freaks I call my friends

One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

I'm not afraid of Death; what's it gonna do, kill me?

If two wrongs don't make a right...try three. And then, turn off the GPS and turn left.)

Don't knock on death's door, ring the doorbell and run- he hates that!

My knight in shining turned out to be a loser in aluminum foil.

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!

"Some see the glass half full, some see it half empty. Me? i just want to know who the heck is drinking my damn soda."

I dream of a better world...where chickens can cross roads without having their morals questioned.

"The greener grass on the other side is probably just artificial turf."

Of course I'm talking to myself, who else can I trust? *suspicious look in the mirror*

"Nobody move! I dropped my brain."

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

Some people are alive today, simply because it is illegal to kill them.

People call another Guy fat. No one knows he has a serious disease causing him to be overweight.

People call an old man ugly. No one knew he had a serious injury to his face while fighting for our country in the war.

The girl you just called fat... she's overdosing on diet pills.

The girl you just called ugly... she spends hours putting on makeup, hoping people will like her.

The boy you just tripped... he is abused enough at home..

That guy you just made fun of for crying... his mother is dying.

*Post this if you're against bullying. I bet 95% of you won’t re-post this, but I'm sure the people with a heart and a backbone will.

Re-Post this to help stop racism!!:

A black man was talking to a white man and said: "I'm black. When I was born I was black. When I grew up, I was black. When I'm sick, I'm black. When I go in the sun, I'm black. When I'm cold, I'm black. When I die, I'll still be black. But you: When you were born, you were pink. When you grew up, you were white. When you're sick, you're green. When you go in the sun you're red. When you're cold, you're blue. When you die, you'll be purple. And you have the nerve to call me colored."

If you think that Women are equals to men, copy and paste this on your profile.

HUMAN STUPIDTY (WARNINGS)

This is a list of all the stupid warnings on the products most of us use daily.

1. Children's Asprin: Warning: Keep Away From Children (Pointless to invent then)

2. Peanuts: Warning: Product May Contain Nuts (What else would it contain)

3. Candle: Warning, A burning candle is fire (Duh)

4. Frozen Pizza: Warning: Do not eat before cooking (Who's tried that)

5. Butcher Knife: Warning: Keep Out of Children (Strange Warning they must have had problems before)

6. Hair Coloring: Warning: Do not use as an ice cream topping (Ice Cream topping? Really?)

7. Sleeping Pills: Warning: May Cause Drowsiness (They're sleeping pills)

8. Puzzle: Warning: Some Assembly Required (And i buy a puzzle expecting it to be put together, not)

If You/If You've

If you’ve ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile.

If you've ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this on to your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you’ve ever walked into a wall, copy this onto your profile

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are totally confused right now copy this onto your profile.

Human Stupidity 2

On a bag of Frito's! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

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