Girl: Do I ever cross your mind?
Boy: No
Girl: Do you like me?
Boy: No
Girl: Do you want me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you cry if I left?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you live for me?
Boy: No
Girl: Would you do anything for me?
Boy: No
Girl: Choose--me or your life
Boy: My life

The girl runs away in shock and pain and the boy runs after her and says...

The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.

The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.

The reason I don't want you is because I need you.

The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.

The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.

The reason why I'm not willing to do you anything for you is because I would do everything for you.

The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Find the guy that calls you beautiful instead of hot,

who calls you back when you hang up on him,

who'll lay under the stars for hours and listen to your heart beat.

Or will stay awake just to watch you sleep.

Wait for the guy that kisses your forehead,

who keeps your picture in his wallet,

who wants to show you off to the world even when your in sweatpants,

who holds your hand in front of all his friends,

who thinks your beautiful without makeup,

one who is constantly telling you of how much he cares and how is lucky to have you,

THE one who turns to his friends and says THAT'S HER!

the guy that for some freaking reason I can't find

If at least once a week, someone misspells or mispronounces your last name wrong...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If the Jonas Brothers said breathing wasn't cool 95 percent of girls would be dead. If you would be part of the 5 who'd laugh their ass off at them, copy this into your profile.

If you have a ridiculously long profile, copy and paste this onto your profile to make it longer.

If you are anti-social sometimes copy this into your profile (not sometimes. all the time)

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

And…if you have ever been kidnapped and nearly eaten by evil flying squirrels before your vampire boyfriend saved you, then you found a flamethrower and vanquished the squirrels shouting “Die, squirrel beasts, die!”, copy this into your profile.

65 percent of Teenagers spend more time watching TV rather then read, if you are part of the 35 percent who read more that watch TV then cut and paste this to your Profile

If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the Trix, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this and paste it on your profile.

If your like Sharpies, penguins, cookies, close friends, and the internet, copy this to your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE that it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile.

98 percent of the population has a myspace. If you're one of the 2 percent that isn't an emo bastard, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you love copy and paste its, even though there useless, copy this in your profile.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile.

If you think iPods were gifts from the gods copy and paste this onto your profile

If you have a tendency to talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

92 percent of the teenage population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said that it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Put this in your profile if you're part of the 8 percent that would be laughing your butt off.

If you've ever tried to impress a guy, but ended up making yourself look horrible then copy this to your profile!

Instead of doing it yourself, you like to copy. If that describes you, paste this into your profile.

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

If, for no reason, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile

If you have ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile.

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

Words of Wisdom:

I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To.

If at first you don't succeed, cheat, repeat until caught, and then lie!

Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway.

Constipated People Don't Give A Crap.

"I didn't lose my mind, I sold it on ebay."

When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Random Quotes!

"I think my cat is going to kill me."

"Na na na na na na na na Batman squirrel!"

"I wanna poke a squirrel!"

"OMG I'm like a piece of toast!"

"Join the army, visit exotic places, meet strange people, and then kill them."

"I made you a cookie, but I eated it."

"Warning. Your computer has a virus and needs to be hit several times."

"Never hit a person with glasses, hit them with a baseball bat!"

"May I borrow a pen? I need to stab you in the eye."

"Before you die, you see...the muffin."

"Hard work is not judged by the ink on the page, but by the ink on the hands"

- "love is like war; bloody hard work"

- "like the morning dew, each day is a new beginning and a new chance for all"

- "as long as you are loved, evil will never swallow you whole"

- "the earth is our mother... and we are the children with her blood on our hands"

- A movie/music/book lover. (Alright, so maybe I can't stay away from talking about books for even a few lines. It's not an obsession. -eye twitches- Really.)

- A girl who will probably stay single forever. (Thanks to being a hopeless romantic. But if you're a romantic guy teen...hey ; Lol, kidding. Sort of. Yes, I am. I dunno)

-It's the kind of relationship where we have a secret handshake, and she begs him to watch Disney movies with her, while he begs her to watch a scary movie instead. It's where they laugh and joke all the time, but they're serious when it's time to be serious. It's where neither of them have to say 'I love you' because they know with all their hearts they love each other. It's where they can mess around on her couch, and then she'll laugh at him when he tries not to look guilty in front of her dad. It's the kind of love everyone dreams about-

-There's that one quote, 'when I'm around you the sky is a different blue'. What happens when I'm around you, and the goddamn sky is gray?-

-So here's to teenage romance, and not knowing why it hurts like hell-

-With bloodshot eyes, I'll watch you sleeping. The warmth beside me, is slowly fading- (Tears Don't Fall, by Bullet for My Valentine)

-It's sad when people you know, become people you knew...When you can walk right past someone like they were never a big part of your life. How you used to be able to talk for hours, and now...you can barely even look at them-

-I miss you...alot-

-& she's so scared to get close to anyone because everyone who said they'd never leave...left-

-Beginnings are scary endings are s a d It's the middle that counts the most;; don't look too hard for happy endings because you might just miss the best part of the story-

-People hold onto something because they're afraid nothing that great will ever happen to them again-

-If you can't hear my heartbeat ;; then you're too far away-

- just because she comes off strong doesn't mean she didn't fall asleep crying & even though she acts like nothing is wrong, maybe, just maybe -- she's really good at lying -

-After a year in therapy, my psychiatrist finally said to me, "Maybe...life isn't for everyone." -

-You want a song of glory? Well I'm fucking screaming it at you- (Box Full of Sharp Objects by The Used)

-Falling in love was the best idea I ever had- (Same song as above)

- Forged in war, born of death, saved by love - Jasper Hale

- I'd tell her that I'll never know what it was like to be her. But I do know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in, but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside, to try to kill the thing on the inside. - (Girl, Interrupted)

- "You're a good friend and I love you and all...but if we ever get chased by zombies, I'm totally tripping you." - (Me to a friend of mine)

-Who are you to judge the life I live? I know I'm not perfect - and I didn't live to be. But before you start pointing fingers, make sure your hands are clean- (Bob Marley)

-You know you're in love when reality is finally better than your dreams- (Dr. Seuss)

-People will always talk about you. Might as well give them something to talk about- ;)

-A wise girl kisses but doesn't love, listens but doesn't believe, and leaves before she is left- (Marylin Monroe)

-And you can quote me on the quote, unquote- (Dane Cook)

-Love is when two people who care for each other get confused- (Bob Schneider)

-Why do we kill people who kill people to show people that killing people is wrong?-

-Strike a pose; & act like your famous-

-The hardest thing in this world is to live in it- (Buffy)

-To live is the rarest thing; most people only exist-

-It's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be real hard. And we're gonna have to work at this everyday, but I wanna do that...because I want you. All of you...forever-

-Behind every untrusting girl is someone who made her that way-

-"You think I lifted a van off you?" His tone questioned my sanity- (Twilight)

-When life offers you a dream so far beyond any of your expectations, it's not reasonable to grieve when it comes to an end- (Twilight)

-But I'm tired of trying to stay away from you Bella- (Edward Cullen) -gasp&orfaint-!

-And so the lion fell in love with the lamb...What a stupid lamb. What a sick, masochistic lion- (Edward and Bella)

(I would also just like to take a minute to point out that Edward and Bella so brought the word 'masochistic' back. I mean, no one even knew that was a word, or used it, until them. Just saying.)

-I dazzle people?- (Edward Cullen, lol)

-Do you remember when you told me I couldn't see myself clearly? You obviously have the same blindness- (Bella Swan)

-You're wrong you know. You are worth it- (Jasper Hale Cullen)

-Cullen boys...because they don't make them like that anymore- ;)

-Stupid, shiny Volvo owner- (Twilight)

-Bella's all about the extreme sports these days- (Alice Cullen)

-Boys in books...are just better-

-I have more fictional boyfriends than you do. Beat that!-

-Hello, my name is: GOD- haha

-I run with vampires-

-Edward Cullen is so bringing sexy back-

-I'll be your Bella if you'll be my Edward-

-It's funny how someone can break your heart and you still love them with all the little pieces-

-Happiness. It made the whole dying thing pretty bearable- (New Moon)

-It's not about right. It's not about wrong. It's about power- (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

-She's like a woman fighting for more than life. She fights like fighting is her life. It is the air she breathes, and she knows she will win because...there is no alternative- (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

-Who really cares if you're in your house, or in a big open field? There is always something to surround you. You can pretend like you're free, but you're not. Not really. You will always be trapped. Four walls of plaster or the roundness of the encroaching atmosphere. I see no difference-

-Your mom- (Some genius)

-Well...you're a flower!- (Me)

-It's pretty sad when you think about it. But I don't think about it- (My friend)

-Yeah, none of those freaky Virgos here- lol (Jacob Black)

-It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have every done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known- (Sydney Carton from A Tale of Two Cities)

-The trouble with most of us is that we would rather by ruined by praise than saved by critiscm- (Norman Vincent Peale)

-It is in our idleness, in our dreams, that the submerged truth sometimes come to the top- (Virginia Woolf)

-Obstacles are things you see when you take your eyes off the goal- (E. Joseph Cossman)

-You don't have to have a reason to feel good - You can feel good for no reason at all-

-The best things in life aren't things- (Art Buchwald)

-Let us endeavor to live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry- (Mark Twain)

-"Good causes" seem to be quite expensive, especially compared to how cheap the bad ones are- (Me)

-I look in the mirror & force myself to not look away. You can't look away from the truth. This reality that grips me is making me fall undone. When did this reflection change, & where did this thing come from?- (Me)

-Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience - Lol! (Some Genius)

-Wait 'til there's someone to cry about, someone to fight it out, someone to say you're the reason they breathe-

-Aerodynamically, the bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn't know it, so it keeps flying anyway-

They say guns dont kill people, people kill people. But i think guns help...If you just stood there and yelled BANG, i doint think that would kill to many people.

Most people are only alive because its illegal to shoot them

Its not cheating unless you get caught

I hope life isnt a joke, because i dont get it.

Best friends are the people that know all about and still put up with you!

If you know someone who is slower than a herd of turtles stammpeading through peanut butter, put this on your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious preppy people PLEASE copy this in your profile

If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think those kids should just give the Rabbit his cereal put this in your profile!

f there are times where you just wanna annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile

ADHD is Automatic Death by Hyperness Disorder

Before you criticize some one, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you’re a mile away and you still have their shoes.

If, for no warning, you have laughed during a movie part that wasn't funny, put this in your profile.

The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.

If you've ever forgotten how old you are when someone asked you, copy and paste this onto your pro.

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you memorize the complete biographies and physical traits of every character in Twilight (or almost, at least). Crazy is when you write Emmett or Edward Cullen is hot on your homework instead of doing it. Crazy is when you call everyone in the phone book that has the last name Cullen. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done to the list!

You laugh, I laugh. You cry, I cry. You hurt, I hurt. You jump off a bridge, I get a paddle boat and save your stupid ass.

A friend helps you up when you fall a best friend continues walking while saying, "Walk much dumbass?"

A friend gives you their umbrella in the rain a best friend takes your and says, "RUN,Bitch,RUN!"

A friend wipes your tears when your rejected a best friend goes up to him and says, "It's because your gay isn't it?"

A friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, THAT WAS AWESOME, LETS DO IT AGAIN!!

I read Eclipse and I wanted to kick Jacob Black REALLY REALLY HARD

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull, or vice-versa, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever run into a tree, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you're one of those people who gets excited when you see just two reviews, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever stopped in the middle of a busy street to look at something, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever went to tuck your hair behind your ear, and end up accidentally poking yourself in the eye, copy this to your profile.

If you forgot your phone number when someone asked you for it, copy this to your profile.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile.

If u think rock paper scissors solves everything then put this in your profile!

If you've ever wondered why Bush won't leave the friggin' war and let the remaining soldiers live, copy and paste this onto your profile.

My best friend is insane, if you agree or if you have an insane friend then copy this to your profile

If you like chocolate as much as I do copy this in your profile.

Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun!

Friends will always be like "well you deserve better" but best friends will be prank calling him saying "you will die in seven days"

Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.

Therapist = The/rapist... scary thought

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then

And God(CARLISLE) said "Let there be Edward,"...and it was gooooood

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.

Don't yawn in the shower. You might drown. -Bill Cosby