"Curiosity killed the Cat

But Satisfaction brought it back"

‘Ello duckies, Cat here.

I’ve been a member of ff.net for quite a few years and have finally worked up the nerve to post some my stories. So, I think I will explain about my writing style, preferences’, dislikes, etc.

~~~~Posting Dates

"I love deadlines. I especially love the swooshing noise they make as they go flying by." ~Unknown

Asking an artist of any kind to turn something in by a precise date is like telling the rain to stop after a certain point. It just doesn’t happen. Therefore, if I ever say that I will do something by a specific point in time, you are hereby advised not take me seriously and not get your hopes up. No matter how good my intentions were at the time, the sad truth is that it just won’t get done.

~~~~Pairings

“The laws of gravity cannot be held responsible for people falling in love.” ~ Albert Einstein

I will only write pairings that I actually believe belong together and would work together. I do have a few guilty pleasures that I read, but I don’t think I’ll be writing any of them unless I am very bored. These are only the pairings that I have stories in the works for, so I’ll probably have more up eventually.

By the way, I seem to have a problem with canon, so…

Side Note: I will never bash any characters that are not inherently evil. I may poke fun at them, but I won’t destroy them.

Ships I Sail:

Harry/Hermione - I don’t care what JKR says, the books were all leading up to them getting together, not him and SuperFanGirl and certainly not her and TeaspoonBoy.

Harry/Draco - ...They're hot together, alright. And in the really wel written fics, they, well they work for some reason.

Hermione/Severus - um...ITS ALL PHOENIXWRITINGS FAULT! She got me hooked on the pairing because of her bloody "The Problem with Purity" story, so all blame for any SSHG plot bunnies i may have goes straight to her.

Sirius/Remus - I love Tonks, really I do, but when I got to the part in the book where it said that she and Remus were together, I had to do a double take (This was, incidentally, before I fell in love with SBRL, for which I blame “Shoebox”).

Robin/Raven - I also love Starfire, but just… no.

Zuko/Katara - They’ve got the chemistry and Aang is twelve and shorter than her! It just works, alright.

Haruhi/Kyouya - Tamaki is adorable, but Haruhi would kill him.

Ships I Sink:

Lily/Severus or Harry/Severus - ….shudder. And to clarify, I don’t dislike Snape. I think he has a lot of goodness in him, deep down….very, very deep down. But he is still a bitter old man who continues to hold a childhood grudge against child who had nothing to do with the way his father acted as a teenager. That and Lily and James belong together, damnit. And as for Harry, the bitter old man grudge still applies.

Tonks/Remus - Same argument as inSBRL.

Ron/Hermione - Ick. Just ick.

~~~~Language

“English is a language that lurks in dark alleys, beats up other languages, and rifles through their pockets for spare vocabulary” ~ James D. Nicoll

Right, if you haven’t noticed so far, I’m a bit British. You see, Mummy dearest was born in jolly old England, somewhere abouts in Sussex. She moved to the states when she was a teenager and eventually lost most of the accent, but not the vernacular, which I picked up from her and my very welsh Grandma. Usually I can tone it down for my distinctly American fics, except for the word ‘bloody’. I use ‘bloody’ a lot. A lot, a lot. I can never seem to exclude that particular word because I use it so much in my daily life that it just doesn’t seem ‘British’ to me.

“In certain trying circumstances, urgent circumstances, desperate circumstances, profanity furnishes a relief denied even to prayer.” ~ Mark Twain

As for swearing, well…. I can be very colorful, if I choose to be…. and I usually do.

~~~~Rants

“A Fanatic is one who can’t change their mind, and won’t change the subject.” ~ Sir Winston Churchill

This is reserved for my many long-winded soapbox speeches. I don’t have any at the moment, but rest assured, it won’t stay that way for long.

~~~~Stories

"The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense." - Tom Clancy

The only story I’m working on now is Harry Potter and the Butterfly Effect, which is written in answer to a challenge issued by Reptilia28.

As soon as I saw the challenge specs, my muse Tallulah promptly kicked me over the head and started wildly gestulating. So I thought that it would be a good fic to start out with.

CHALLENGE SPECIFICATIONS:

Harry is killed at 17 during a fight with Voldemort. He's sent to his Death's office (explained later) and finds out that this isn't the first time that this has happened.

Harry's Death (who can have a human name) is mad at his arrival. Apparently, people dying before their time is a black mark on the various Deaths' records, and Harry is getting perilously close to getting this particular one fired.

When Harry asks what was supposed to have happened, Death goes off on a rant saying how he was supposed to have killed Voldemort, found his soulmate ("Some Granger girl...") and lived to be a centennial age. But since Harry keeps getting into life-threatening situations for one reason or another, he keeps dying before that happens. Harry is surprised about the soulmate part.

Death gives Harry a paper to sign that allows him to retain his memories (the previous times, he wasn't given this option for some reason). Harry is deposited to a previous time of the writer's choosing.

Eventually, Harry gets it right. He kills Voldemort, gets the girl, and lives to a ripe old age of whatever. And Death doesn't get fired.

REQUIREMENTS:

Harry had to have died at least three times before this one.

The memory keeping contract must be included.

Death must refer to Hermione as "some Granger girl" when Harry's soulmate turns up in his rant.

Obviously, must be H/Hr.

Have fun.

OPTIONAL:

Dumbledore's manipulations can be a factor in Harry's premature demises.

Hermione may or may not be told of Harry's little "situation."

~~~~Ending

Well, that’s it for now. I’ll probably add more later, but not for awhile. I don’t foresee a lot of people coming here anytime soon, at least not until I post more.

Buh-bye!

"The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity." –Ellen Parn

"The power of accurate observation is frequently called cynicism by those who don't have it." - George Bernard Shaw

"Where are we going, and why am I in this hand basket?" - Bumper Sticker

“Writing is easy. Open a vein and bleed on paper.” ~Ernest Hemingway

“I think that maybe if women and children were in charge we would get somewhere.” James Thurber

“I used to wake up at 4 A.M. and start sneezing, sometimes for five hours. I tried to find out what sort of allergy I had but finally came to the conclusion that it must be an allergy to consciousness.” James Thurber

“...you wouldn't know a subtle plan if it painted itself purple and danced naked on top of a harpsichord, singing 'Subtle Plans Are Here Again.'”- Blackadder

“At no time is freedom of speech more precious than when a man hits his thumb with a hammer.” ~Marshall Lumsden

"Children, don't speak so coarsely," said Mr. Webster, who had a vague notion that some supervision should be exercised over his daughters' speech, and that a line should be drawn, but never knew quite when to draw it. He had allowed his daughters to use his library without restraint, and nothing is more fatal to maidenly delicacy of speech than the run of a good library. ~Robertson Davies, Tempest Tost

"Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny." - Guy Davenport

"Sanity is a madness put to good uses." - George Santayana

"Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact." - George Eliot

"Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth." - Sherlock Holmes (by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle)

"I'm all for keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters." ~ Frank Lloyd Wright

“When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water.”

“We may not pay Satan reverence, for that would be indiscreet, but we can at least respect his talents.” -- Mark Twain

"Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society." - Mark Twain