Hello, everyone!

I am going to tell you a bit about myself. I love reading and writing. I play the flute and I love it when I get reviews because I know my stories are being read and my work is getting out there. So, please read my stories and review. I LOVE YOU ALL!

Girl Comebacks!

Man: Where have you been all my life? Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine? Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living? Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign? Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the ends of the world for you. Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Woman: If I could see you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put u and i together. Woman: Really? I'd put f and u together.

Man: Your eyes, they're amazing. Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

Man: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? Woman: About as much as when you got kicked out of Hell.

Guy: I'd like to call you. What's your number? Girl: It's in the phone book Guy: But I don't know your name Girl: That's in the phone book too

Guy: I know how to please a woman Girl: Then please leave me alone

Guy: I can tell you want me Girl: Ohhhh, your so right, I want you to leave

Guy: If you were a hamburger at McDonalds you would be McGorgeous Girl: Would that be under your McLame Burger

Guy: Did it hurt when you fell out of heaven Girl: Not nearly as bad as when you fell on planet rejection

Guy: Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again Girl: No, but sure...next time just be sure to keep walking

Man: If we were the last people on Earth, then will you be mine? Woman: If we were the last people on Earth, you would be dead by now.

Girls, copy and paste this on your profile!

A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit
some friends one evening
and time passed quickly as each shared
their various experiences of the past year.

She ended up staying longer than
planned, and had to walk home alone.
She wasn't afraid
because it was a small town and she lived
only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm
trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from
harm and danger.

When she reached the alley, which was a
short cut to her house, she decided to take it.

However, halfway down the alley she
noticed a man standing at the end as though he
were waiting for her.

She became uneasy and began to pray,
asking for
God's protection.

Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness
and security wrapped round her, she felt as
though someone was walking with her.

When she reached the end of the alley,
she walked right past the man and arrived
home safely.

The following day, she read in the
newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same
alley just twenty minutes after she had been there.

Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and
the fact that it could have been her, she began to
weep.

Thanking the Lord for her safety and to
help this young woman, she decided to go to the
police station.

She felt she could recognize the man, so
she told them her story.

The police asked her if she would be
willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify
him.

She agreed and immediately pointed out
the man she had seen in the alley the night
before.

When the man was told he had been
identified, he
immediately broke down and confessed.

The officer thanked Diane for her bravery
and asked if there was anything they could do
for her.

She asked if they would ask the man one
question.

Diane was curious as to why he had not
attacked her.

When the policeman asked him, he
answered, "Because she wasn't alone.
She had two tall men walking on either side of
her."

Amazingly, whether you believe or not,
you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of
teenagers will not stand up for God?

Even when you can't see Him, GOD is there! Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?

If you aren't ashamed to do this, Please pass this on. Jesus said,

"If you are ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of you before my Father."