Name: Joe Morelli

Age: 32 (March 1st)

Location: Trenton, New Jersey

Favorite foods: cookies, lasagna, my mom's chocolate pudding, toast, and other "man food"

Hobbies: baseball, watching sports on ESPN, doing "guy" things, having sex with women (I am so hot) and writing about it on bathroom and/or stadium walls, belching loudly and blaming any apparent flatulence on my dog, Bob.

About me: I work as a police officer for the Trenton PD, which means I work a lot and don't have time for things like making sure my on again, off again girlfriend doesn't fool around with short Army guys who think they're all big and bad just coz they got "skillz" or get herself blown up. What is it with you women that you insist on having things like jobs and social lives? Why can't you just stay at home and cook and clean and raise babies? Why do you have to go around cheating with guys from work, when you could be WORKING at HOME by taking care of A MAN WHO LOVES YOU? Is it the tan? The smile? I could afford to get weekly spa treatments and my teeth Zoomed, too, if I were SELLING DRUGS TO CHILDREN AND KILLING PEOPLE FOR MONEY!! LOL. JUST KIDDING! Anyway, in my spare time, I like to nap in the street and let cars run over me. Some say this is boring, but if you ask me, there's not a lot you can do to top being castrated!

I'm always looking to meet new friends, especially blondes with "enhanced" features, so if you're interested feel free to add me to your MySpace. (Bounty hunters, lingerie buyers, and women with the initials "S.P." need not apply)