A new year is here. So excited to see what people have thought up.

Sayings that I love:

It's bad to suppress your laughter: it goes back down to your hips.

Stressed, depressed, but well dressed.

Everyone has a photographic memory... Some just don't have the film.

After Tuesday even the calendar says W T F.

Never get jealous when you see your ex with someone else because our parents taught us to give our used toys to the lees fortunate.

Men are like bank accounts: without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.

Stress: the confusion created when one's mind overrides the body's basic desire to choke the living shit out of some jerk who desperately deserves it.

Good friends don't let you do stupid things... Alone.

Men are like videos... After 3 days you want to return them.

When you really, really want to slap someone, do it. Just say "mosquito" when you do.

Don't be a woman that needs a man... Be a woman a man needs.

Drink coffee: do stupid things faster with more energy!

My daily affirmation:

I deserve to be happy. I will accomplish my goals. I will achieve something meaningful in my life. I am worthy of love.

An English professor wrote the words "a woman without her man is nothing", and asked the students to correctly punctuate it. All the mallets wrote " a woman, without her man is nothing." All the females wrote " a woman: without her, man is nothing." PUNCTUATION IS POWERFUL!!!!