Welcome to the Drunken Tavern

Want fanfic and saving yourself from the Boring Legions of Boredom? The Drunken Tavern is here to address that problem! Here in the Drunken Tavern, we strive to create works of literature to entertain and sometimes inspire readers worldwide. Our writers continue to work as a cooperating collective to bring you amusement through reading, featuring your favorite characters from your favorite shows, games, and other works of literature. Should you have any requests for a certain story or plot, please do not hesitate to ask via review or private messaging. Likewise, please do not hesitate to review our works and stories and express your honest opinion/s about them. However, please abide by the FanFiction guidelines for reviewing works and stories. Please note that publishing new stories and updating existing stories may take some time, as most of our writers consider writing fanfiction a hobby, and possess moderate to little commitment towards it. As always, your patience is appreciated during writing and updating. If you have more questions, please refer to the FAQ below or ask through reviews or private messaging.

Copyright Notices and Guidelines

Please note that all works and stories posted on this site are works of fiction, and whatever names, characters, locations, incidents, objects, certain situations and proverbs/quotes that are copyrighted or trademarked legally belong to their respective owners, with the sole exception of fan-made original characters, are products of each author'(s') imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to locales or actual events or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. Due consideration and disclaimers are always given in each and every published work by the Tavern. We continue to abide by the guidelines aforementioned by FanFiction.net, and have no desire whatsoever to disobey these guidelines.

Drunken Tavern: An Inspection

Drunken Tavern Help Desk and Support Line (The Bar and Telephone) - Operated by Suggestions, Inquiry, & Requests Interactive (SIRI). The inbox is under the control of SIRI, and all messages are directed to her. She forwards messages and sends messages when required.

The Whine Cellar - Operated by miztah Han. Writers in training are stationed here under his tutelage.

The Kitchen - Where Mom is.

The Back Room - Where the monsters that are not writers are kept.

Tavern 1st Floor - Rooms of the Drunken Tavern Juniors. Too many posters and flowers.

Tavern 2nd Floor - The virtual home of the Drunken Tavern Unholy Trinity / The Triumvirate / Game Master Gurus / whatever.

Tavern 3rd Floor - Restricted Access! Prison Cells of the Drunken Tavern Elites.

The Attic - You do not want to know what's in there.

List of Drunken Taverners

The Drunken Tavern Elites

Drunken Rookie (Founder, Developer, Editor-in-Chief, most drunk)

Panacea447 (Founder, Developer, sometimes drunk)

The Drunken Tavern Juniors

Kowalski4Evah!!! (Writer, too many toys, currently drinking)

Soft-Kitty (hatchling writer, stone cold sober, loves nuts)

ChainsawGirl123 (don't ask, just-just don't ask!!!)

Triksterr206 (newest addition! mailbox-basher sold separately)

The Drunken Tavern Triumvirate

CalmKlawd (Writer, backstabber, cheat, thief, my best friend, hangover P)

TerraNovA (writer, obsessed about -- things, drinks only iced tea)

DepressioN (too loud, scoundrel, my other best friend)

Drunken Tavern Help Desk and Support Line

Suggestions, Inquiry, & Requests Interactive (She's a woman, you know!)

Prime Minster of Awesomeness

miztah Han (chief consultant, mentor, writer, village elder, heavy drinker, AWESOME!)

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)

FAQ with CalmKlawd (6-6-2011)

Q: Why do you call yourselves the Drunken Tavern?

A: It was explained to me when I first hopped aboard this crazy train. We call ourselves Drunken because of the fact that inspiration can come to a writer during even the most boring and mundane moments, where a seeming gap in the time - space continuum can blossom into a good story. Most of our writers are inspired this way: when they think of nothing, they suddenly get struck with an idea that will later turn into a great story. This 'drunkenness with boredom' or what we termed 'The Stupor of Nothingness' is our most frequent way to come up with a good plot, and later, a great story. Crazy right? (oops, you're the one asking the questions! Next,)

Q:Are you guys really drunk when you write your stories?

A: No, we most certainly aren't! It's all explained in the question above. Rest assured, we are not even allowed to drink because of our country's drinking and alcohol laws for minors. And managing to focus, let alone write stories, while drunk is an impossibility. Enough with the crazy questions please!

Q: What genres do you mostly write on?

A: Me? I'm mostly into the action/adventure stuff. But I really don't focus much on writing fanfic, my schoolwork can sometimes pile up to a about a week or so to finish. Rookie's main genre is whatever; Panacea447, Kowalski4Evah!!!, Chainsaw G, S-Kitty (_) and Triksterr are our romance specialists (they're all girls, in case you're wondering); Me and DepressioN are the action/adventure specialists; TerraNovA is our local mistress of whodunit, mystery and suspense; and lastly our mentor, miztah Han, doesn't do any actual writing, but coaches us to improve our writing skillz (oops!) and get us more interested in literature. Thanks Mizta H.!

Q: What projects are you guys currently working on?

A: Well, DepressioN and I took over Rookie's 'Dr. Blowhole's Revenge' so he can focus on 'Only When I Sleep' (still working on its plot during free time, so that'll come out sometime later). Hmm, Penny447 and Triksterr are working on something epic (as far as I know). S-Kitty and Chainsaw-G are still under schooling from Teacher Awesomeness (we have standards, in case you're still wondering, we don't just publish whatever fanfic is written). Kowalski4Evah!!! is coming out with a Penguins' romance (the name is self-explanatory) and TerraNovA is working on a project coming out later this year, if she can fit in with her schoolwork and somewhat crazy detective passions...

Q: What categories do you mostly write on?

A: As of now, for cartoons like the Penguins of Madagascar. Triksterr206 and Drunken_Rookie are currently working on published PoM stories, and as above K4Evah!!! is working on a PoM fic. TerraNovA, DepressioN and I are the gaming gurus, and are currently working on plot ideas for maybe Starcraft and Warcraft fiction. More will be hopefully coming soon in the foreseeable future.

FAQ with Panacea447 (6-15-2011)

Q: How did the Drunken Tavern start out and how were its formative times?

A: Before the Drunken Tavern debuted, I had a very long and rather incessant argument with Drunken_Rookie about starting a fanfic group on this awesome site. He rejected it at first, but later agreed, and so DrunkenTavern was born. But we felt we were lacking in members, and so I traveled long and far to the distant fantasy world of Soft-Kitty and ChainsawGirl123 and beseech them to join us and later to that of my sister, Kowalski4Evah!!! (although I question her pen name, I accept it nonetheless). I then asked if TerraNovA might be interested to join, since she was a literary genius and our own local 'detective' and Private Eye (literally and metaphorically). Later, we recruited CalmKlawd (same way I got Rookie!) and Rookie later recruited DepressioN. It looked great, a band of friends and misfits, but what a band of friendly misfits needed was a mentor. Luckily, we all had the same one in mind. Miztah Han agreed to coach us, and so we were set. Or were we? Nope. We had almost everyone aboard: the comic reliefs; the lovelorn women leading rich fantasy lives they had grown to hate as much as to love; the paranoids and the mentor. *sigh* What we late realized is that every group needs an outsider, an underdog, someone who could look outside of our current predicament and see it as a larger pattern of something even larger -- or just eat butter-nougat candy bars and tell us what he doesn't understand about the sun going up and down. We found such a person, and Rookie's eleven-year old sister Triksterr206 came aboard. *sigh* I see such a great history: filled with turmoils, incessant pleading, diabolic double-crosses, heartbreaks, sappy reunions, the collapse of an era and the realization that we could make something better with what we have with each other -- or just to write awesome fanfic. Looking back and realizing maybe my friends shouldn't have appointed me to write about our history, I know only now that it took me seven minutes to write this, and about a minute and a half to read...Peace out y'all!

Q: Outside of the fanfiction, how do you Taverners interact with each other?

A: Good question, good question. And I have a good answer: as normally as normal friends interact: with all the texting, calling, tweeting and teasing, not to mention all the awesome social gatherings (that's teen colloquial term [uhhh. slang!] for PARTY!) we have together.If you ask me, and you are asking me, we're just a weird or semi-normal bunch of misfits that love and care for each other despite the teasing, the oohs! and the ahhs!, and the occasional prank on each other (Last April 1st does not count!), but we truly have each of our friends' best interests at heart.

Q: April 1st? What happened on April 1st?

A: I don't see how that's relevant to this Q&A but I'll humor you. It involves highly pressurized water cannons, duct tape, a ton of toilet paper, an octopus and a mailbox that hurled insults at all of us whenever we passed but texted us the insults whenever we didn't pass. All I'll say is that I was the primary target, so you'll understand that I'll say no more. Humored yet?

Q: A little. Will you give us more insight on each of the Taverners' personalities?

A: Alright. They're all cute, cuddly, fuzzy, and diabolically adorable. I, on the other hand, am adorably diabolic. But in all seriousness, I've taken the liberty to adding a Whine Tasters section below to address this question. Look it up if you want more insight on each and every one of our Drunken Taverners. Friendly Note: I have no idea what they're going to add on their bios, so don't blame me for not warning you about several side-effects from reading their respective bios such as drowsiness, fainting, nausea, panicking, seizures, diarrhea, Over-Informed-and-Sightly-Uncomfortable Syndrome, nostalgia, Chronic Boredom Syndrome, thanatophobia, delirium, schizophrenia, dizziness, stomachache, severe awkwardness, uncontrollable giggling and laughter, Hollywood fever, INKED (Impulsive Need to Know Everything Disorder), blinding hunger for flesh, Homer Simpson syndrome, dramatic decrease in intelligence, insomnia, hallucinations, and CalmKlawd's Disease.

Q: Alright. Final question, Will you go out on a date with me?

A: Hmmm. Depends.

Q: Depends on what?

A: Only if you agree to go out on April 1st. Peace out yo!

Whine Tasters (Up Close and Personal with our Rag-tag Drunken Taverners):

Panacea447

Hi there! My name's really Panacea, but my friends call me Penny, and my last name is for me to know, and you to find out; but since I never want want you to find out, then it's just for me to know. I'm mostly into romance, action/adventure, and suspense, so you might want to expect me writing on these genres. I write mostly on whatever I'm feeling at the moment, usually when I'm bored and have almost nothing to do, and mostly for the Penguins of Madagascar, The Fairly OddParents, The Simpsons, and Futurama for shows, but I haven't actually developed them (homework =P !); I also have written out some Tekken fanfics, although I'm not quite sure they're really that good. I'm also into World of Warcraft, and I'm a girl XD! I'm currently swamped with schoolwork, so it might take me a while to update on stories. Until then, peace out yo!

CalmKlawd

Seriously Penny, 'CalmKlawd's Disease'? Now I have no idea whether you're kidding or not! . I am one third of DrunkenTavern's Guru-Gamemasters, the others being DepressioN and TerraNovA. I'm comfortable speaking to strangers, even more if I'm anonymous, on the wary chummy levels, anything above that I'll need more duct tape. So you'll understand that I don't give out my name. I mostly write on the genres of Action/Adventure, but I'm also into suspense and comedy. I'm also into games, won't tell you which, just check them out later and narrow it down.

Soft-Kitty

Ummm, looks like my bio is accurate about one thing, I really do love nuts. Probably because I am nuts lol. Ummm, I'm into the Romance genre, and thanks to TerraNova and her fantastical writing talents, to Mystery/Suspense genre as well. The only two personal things I'll really share is that I'm eight years old, so my writing won't be so great until miztah Han says so. He is really a good teacher and I wouldn't know what I'd do without him. And that I really do love cats!

Triksterr206

Like SK, I am kinda young too. And wrote one story but it actually turned out to have pretty good reviews. I swear, I didn't really expect that. I hope that I can come up with more fanfiction. Problem is, I can't really think about any other genres but romance! So Mr. H is currently giving me advice on other genres but it seems hopeless. So, I'll just stick to the romance instead. Thanks Mr. H for trying but it really isn't going to work out. About the stories, I write romance for the Penguins of Madagascar (just one actually) but I'd love to write about Tekken ( particularly LEO who is just indescribably awesome. He can kick my face any day! I also have some ideas for Deathnote, Spongebob, Big Time Rush and iCarly. As for the personal side, on the intellectual: I am not smart; I make mistakes in writing all the time. On the physical side: I only excel in Taekwondo (it's really popular here in the Philippines) and please do note that I am small.

TerraNovA

Can't talk! Too busy playing Starcraft II!

DepressioN

I am so depressed, and oh how I hate the night...

Suggestions, Inquiry, and Requests Interactive (S.I.R.I.)

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