Let's start this sh*t!

My Name iS ExCalibuR, aNd I am a teeN (gO sue me) tHat'S gOiNg tO ROCk yOuR fRiggiN miNdS. Well NOt Really. I'm juSt HeRe fOR tHe fuN Of it aNd lOve tO See HOw deSpiCable I get witH my StORieS in geNeRal b*tC*S! YOu kNOw wHy!? 'CauSe my Shit will be HaRdCORe Stuff tHat will, Slowly CReep iNtO yOuR miNd aNd CHaNge it SO yOu CaN See tHiNgS iN a New peRSpeCtive FuCkERS! YOu guyS aRe NOt gOiNg tO fall fOR all Of tHe fuN aNd madNeSS fROm tHe fiRSt CHapteR, uNtil tHe eNd Of tHe SeRieS I plaN, fOR eveN witH tHe multiple editiNg tHe autHOR NeedS fOR tHe laCk Of SeNSe iN gRammaR RuleS, He will SHiNe iNtO a glORiOuS day wHeRe HiS wRitiNg-Style will be kNOwN, eSpeCially fROm all tHe fRieNdS He HaS tO Help Him. AS lONg aS peOple dON't Call Him meaN tHiNgS aNd iNSult Him fOR His OwN paSSiON aNd idealS aS tO wHat He tHiNkS SHOuld Have HappeNed OR migHt HappeN, He'll gaiN muCH expeRieNCe aS expeCted fROm tHe CHild, aS He iS ONly a New COmeR to tHiS ROad He waNtS tO take, but if yOu dO Help Out ON makiNg hiS StORy betteR, tHe CHaNceS Of Him beCOmiNg big iS HigH ON tHe liSt, fOR He HaS big plaNS fOR HiS idea, aNd NOt eNd HiS dReam miSeRably...

Alright, break it up people, I gave you guys some screen time because this little Asian bastard wouldn't have. Now get the hell out of here before he wakes up and notices what the hell you guys are doing! Move, Move, MOVE!

Ugh... What the hell happened, well whatever.

So I am a new writer in fanfiction.net and hope that I can continuously update on my stories, and yes these are stories, series to be accurate. It will consist of OCs, each of them having their own personal traits that may or may not be predictable (It is so predictable).

Occupation: I am afraid of internet stalkers and trolls who are assholes (so getting trolled for that).

Things I like other than stories: I like everything normal and have some personal preferences as well (Geez Louise dude, your an idiot).

Hobby: You read and/or are reading it right now (NERD!). Also, playing action video games.

Attitude (If you know who and where I am, or just someone who is not self-centered): I am insane (No not crazy, not a killer, not a psychopath, not violent, not even want to see a mammal, or a chicken, cut (but don't take it the words of description lightly people, because the author's writing does reflect on how much his mind works)).

On another note, these are the series/franchises I know of, as in either have lots of knowledge and care for or just love to watch, that may or may not matter (with favorite pairings (a guy can be sensitive asshole)):
1. Kingdom Hearts (SoraxKairi, RikuxYuffie (that sh*t is because of Shire Folk, gotta love his story), RoxasxNamine, and TerraxAqua), also this is my perspective on the story Shire Folk made, as if anyone didn't notice already.
2. Bleach (IchigoxRukia)
3. Ratchet and Clank series
4. Call of Duty Zombies (it actually has some interesting story to tell that ain't explained straight to your face)
5. Portal 1&2
6. Crash Bandicoot early franchise
7. Spyro early franchise
8. Sly Cooper franchise
9. Mario franchise
10. Legend of Zelda franchise
11. Marvel&DC universe (their shit is hardcore as fuck (and thank you for the multiverse idea))
12. Shadow of the Colossus
13. Red V.S. Blue
14. The Disney universe in the 90s
15. The CN universe in the 90s –– early 21st century
16. Mask: The Animated Series
17. Persona 3&4 ([MinatoxYukari = 3] and [SoujixNaoto = 4])
18. TF2/Team Fortress 2
19. God of War franchise (KratosxLoose-girls LOL)
20. Devil May Cry franchise
21. Kamen Rider Heisei series
22. No More Heroes 1&2
23. MadWorld and Anarchy Reigns
24. Okami & Okamiden
25. Teen Titans
26. The Batman series/franchise
27. Transformers Prime
28. Halo franchise
29. Jak trilogy & Jak X
30. Uncharted series
31. MORTAL KOMBAT!!! (FATALITY!)
32. Bioshock franchise
33. Metal Gear Solid 1-4 (METAL GEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrr)
34. Selected Abridged Series
35. Assassin's Creed series
36. My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
37. Ben 10 Original–UA
38. Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy
39. Adventure Time
40. ATLA (Kataang (fuck my life), and Tokka)
41. ALoK
42. Dark Souls 1 & 2
43. Pokémon (Just started, never got to live through the common child life for the franchise)
44. RWBY
45. The top 3 Shonen-jump mangas of the new millenia.
46. Bloodborne
47. Fire Emblem: Awakening (I ain't getting into this battle ground, I'm passionate not suicidal)
48. Game Grumps
48a. It's snowing in Mt. Fuji.

Games I have played:
- I despise myself of saying this but majority of the videogames I play right now are shooters, not that it isn't good for killing time, but I wish to play the art of the videogame world, not know about it and what symbolic meaning they have sometimes.
- KH 1, 2, & DDD
- Spyro franchise (partial)
- Crash Bandicoot franchise (early)
- Harvest Moon
- Dark Cloud (actually my sibling finished it, but I played it once still)
- Ratchet and Clank series
- Jak and Daxter (bastards in hard-ass shit)
- God of War series
- Uncharted 1&2
- Borderlands
- UMvC3 (Mahvel Ba-by!)
- Elder Scrolls 5: Skyrim (move along people, no stupid-ass memes in this profile)
- Playstation All-Stars Battle Royale (it's OK, good to play with friends, but I still have some favoritism for SSBB)
- Mortal Kombat 9 (Noob Saibot gave me nightmares, I can never see any other fatality disgusting ever again)
- Dark Souls (FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU)
- Binding of Isaac (May I remind people that all of the floors you go through are created by the mind of a 5-7 year old boy)
- Pokémon Leaf Green (ROM)
- Pokémon Emerald (ROM)
- Batman Arkham City (LET'S GO KNIGHT!!!)
- SUPER, SMASH BROTHERS!–WiiU (Ready to smash any day at any time)

Favorite Characters in different forms of Media:
- Deadpool (the merc with the mouth that breaks the 4th wall as if it were his mother-tongue)
- Sheogorath (the Daedric Prince of Madness, in other words one of my characters competitors)
- Black Baron, Madworld and Anarchy Reigns (the pimp that ain't even black, but can seriously bust a cap on yo ass)
- Toph, Avatar the Last Airbender ('cause she's tough)
- Ratchet (the alien furball that is not only a mechanical genius, but can cary multiple guns at once and use weapons that's as big as him (I'm looking at you RYNO 5))
- Clank (you might be asking why I put in the odd and sometimes intellectually humorous robot, but I always thought that he was the Hero and Ratchet the sidekick, jk)
- Dante, DMC (half demon, half human, and all awesome, until they had to reboot it (scratch what I said, the reboot is OK, gameplay wise))
- Link, The Legend of Zelda (the spirit of the warrior who fights for the light of Hyrule and has fought against all-odds to do so every time he is reincarnated, if you exclude the failure timeline)
- Haru Glory, Rave Master (the farm boy turned to hero, only he isn't an alien and uses a big-ass sword to cut through his obstacles, as well as some help from friends of course)
- Hamrio Musica (I-do-not-give-a-single-fuck about Fairy Tail's Gray, because this guy was so much more of a bad-ass than Gray ever was, is, and may or may not will be, period)
- Number 0, Monty Uno CKND (similar to Big Boss (but sadly not as badass), my reasoning stands that not only was he the cause of having Number 1, but also for the fact that he can stand alone in a fight and win, even though many of his plans are a tad unorthodox)
- Number 1, Nigel Uno CKND (odd choice, even from me, but he deserves some recognition due to his role on being the earth representative of the GKND)
- Number 5, Abigail Lincoln CKND (much more awesome than most of the characters I have seen from the series hands down)
- Solid Snake (crawling through a human sized oven/microwave, that is all)
- Big Boss/Naked Snake (no Big Boss, no Solid Snake, and he doesn't only get his strong point from there, hell NO! Just read about him in a wiki and get the game, worth it)
- Sora, Kingdom Hearts (I really didn't think of him as an awesome character, really, but ever-since I read Shire Folk's imagination as to how the story should have progressed with a different way on how he developed Sora's characteristics, I had to give him a spot in this list)
- Kairi, Kingdom Hearts (the same reason I gave for Sora, I swear people who are normal fans of Kingdom Hearts should read his stuff)
- Kamen Rider Kabuto (an evolving masked rider that began with a single mind track on killing all of his enemies without remorse, to a man struggling to comprehend what is more important, the copy or the originals; also, his suit can move at the speed of light... Yeah)
- Kratos, God of War series (not only a deservingly whiny god-slayer, but a man who knows how to treat all the ladies at once (?))
- Crypto, D.A.H.–Destroy All Humans! (the horny alien mentored by his partner Pox, who also has permission to use the deadliest weapons in his universe)
- Roland, Borderlands 1&2 (the deceased ex-crimson leader who died fighting for the people, and the character I chose first when I played borderlands, Jack deserves more than just lead in his innards)
- Ichigo Kurosaki (he reminds me a bit of myself when talking about his protective nature)
- Rukia Kuchiki (a midget soul reaper with some spunk against Mr. Stawberry, love it)
-Gatts/Guts, Berserk (The guy is a blood-thirsty ex-mercenary with a beef with a person equivalent to angels, wields a bland big-ass sword that still makes him manly, goes against all odds with fighting monsters, demons, and other magical beings, and ain't a whiny bitch (emphasis on bitch))
- Tex, Red V.S. Blue (have you seen what she did in season 8 to the Red and Blue team, if you haven't then do it right now)
- Captain America (the soldier that fights for freedom and the American way without being an alien, what else do you want?)
- Minato Arisato, Persona 3 (the silent and sleepy bluenette, and the seal for Nyx)
- Souji Seta, Persona 4 (although depicted as a swaggerific yet still stoic and a bit-random guy canon-wise, I always thought of him as the calm and collective type (Scratch it, I find the randomness quite hilarious at some times))
- Naoto Shirogane, Persona 4 (although a hard-boiled crossdresser, she is still badass non-the-less)
- The Mask, Stanley Ipkiss (the inner thoughts of a shy bank-worker who secretly wanted to live life to the fullest)
- Kefka Palazzo FFVI (the insane motherfuckin God of Magic clown mage who succeeded in conquering his world)
- Zack Fair, Pre-FFVII (a happy-go-lucky SOLDIER operative that has infinite potential as a warrior of his world)
- Spy, TF2 (even though not my favorite assassin, he is probably one of the most awesome ones since he came from one of the craziest first-person videogames have ever played)
- Alucard, Hellsing Ultimate and Abridged (who the FUCK is he? He's a fuckmothering vampire that eats people, that's what)
- Scout, TF2 (a speedster with a cheeky tongue, and does annoying but decent damage towards his enemies, my way to kill the other team)
- Ezio Auditore/Altaïr Ibn-La'Ahad (two of the most bad-ass assassins ever, end of story)
- Zero, Borderlands 2 (when both you and I saw the trailer for Zero, we all knew he would have some badassness in him)
- Optimus Prime, Transformers Universes (even in the stupid Michael Bay reboot he is still quite the awesome leader we all know and love)
- Edward Richtofen, Call of Duty: Zombies (that is one messed up zombie doctor)
- Batman (it's the motherfuckin batman, what else do I need to say 'cause Superman got nothin on him)
- Joker (if you have the Batman as your favorite character and posting it online, you have to show some love for the polar opposite of Batman, the Yin for his Yang, also he is a crazy yet somehow funny motherfucker)
- Goku, Dragonball series (although Superman may have bested him even in his prime of primes, he is still one of my favorite over the top action heros from my childhood)
- Kamina, Gurren Lagann (the most loud mouth hero I have seen to actually pull it of, without having the backlash of annoying goody-two-shoes clichéness. So let me ask you, WHO THE HELL DID YOU THINK HE WAS?)
- Stan Lee (if I ever meet him in real life, I would want to hear him just say Excelsior just once, then there's one less thing to not regret before dying (fangasm aside, it's Stan Lee, all you have to do is use the same reasoning as Big Boss, so there))
- Spiderman (give it up for the webslinger of New York, who has fought against countless foes and had many times fought against unbeatable odds, and yet he still survives (until Amazing Spiderman #700 came out, that really was not Marvel's best choice (scratch this also, I like Doc Parker); also killed Batman in DEATHBATTLE, hosted by Wiz and Boomstick)
- Lucas/Ness, Mother series (I know that many of you who will read this will not know who these children are, but here me out; each kid individually had to grow up earlier than any of the previous characters mentioned above; from a simple and peaceful life, to a devastating event and great losses that could and have shattered any children's, let-alone the average citizen's, mind, but they move on and went to distance to protect what they cared for the most)
- Solaire of Astora, Dark Souls (Do you even lift? Pfft, please. The real question is; Do you even praise the motherfucking sun?! Hail to all Sunbros)
- Gwyn, Lord of Sunlight and Cinder (this old husk of a God is one aggressive motherfucker, and his sword is still not that awesome; only redeeming part is the battle theme that fits the boss' sorrow)
- Artorias the Abyss Walker, Dark Souls (a foolish soldier that simply followed his king's orders, and bravely walked where no others would dare to even imagine to walk. This man, as blind as he was, was both powerful and honorable, unfit for the treatment he was given when he was consumed by the enemy)
- Gehrman, the First Hunter (such a sad man, like many in line of Fromsoftware's great and powerful characters. A man given purpose, then stripped away from his holdings, pushed to the point where he shackles himself within a dream filled with death and sorrow for the rest of his life)
- Jay, Deep Space 69 (have you seen what he did in the recent trilogy?! What the hell is his dick made out of?!)
- Edd Gould (I honestly feel bad for this loss. Sure, I actually don't follow him like a big fan, hell I've never been a big fan of any of the franchises I listed above, just avid ones that loves the concept of the topic at hand, but Edd is kind of different. He was a British dude who found wonderful friends who supported his dreams and goals, as they themselves became engrossed with his own ideas, to some extent. In all honesty, I kind of look up to that, because here was a guy who not only lived his dreams, but also had a fairly nice life with loving friends, and a will to fight off against cancer for six years, SIX YEARS! Of course, rather than bringing up bad memories from this little awkward moment, I still feel like as if there has to be some people on this site to at least remember his name, and I feel obligated to point a name of someone who I look up to)
- Maximillian and Simmons (Sim-mans, Simoan, DaFuq you write the guys name), YO VIDEOGAMES! (The friggin best hilarious duo in my opinion, just because their rude, Simmons is probably shrewd, and how they voice out their hype and anger is so upbeat and again hilarious that you can't help but laugh. Also, Max the real Nicolas Cage, and the fake Cage is simply a double)

Quotes:

- "What is a man? A miserable pile of secrets, but enough talk... Have at you!" Dracula, Castlevania Symphony of the Night.
- "There can only be ONE!!!" the Demoman, TF2.
- "Who touched my gun!?" the Heavy, TF2
- "Laa shay'a waqui'n moutlaq bale kouloun moumkine. The wisdom of our Creed is revealed through these words. We work in the dark to serve the light. We are Assassins. Nothing is true, everything is permitted." the Assassin's Creed oath.
- "Your eyes deceive you. An illusion fools you all. I move for the kill." Zero, Borderlands 2
- "YO! Videogames", Maximillian Dood
- "And remember, the universe has a wonderful sense of humor. The trick is learning how to take a joke", Orvus, R&C CIT
- "CHEESE, For Everyone!" Sheogorath, The Elder Scrolls IV&V
- "Screw the rules, I have money!" Seto Kaiba, YGOTAS
- "Henshin!" All Kamen Riders.
- "Would you kindly..." Atlas, Bioshock
- "Give that bitch a canon! Bitches love canons", Alucard, Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Episode 2
- "You've activated my Alu-card", Alucard, Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Episode 3
- "Do you know... The definition... Of insanity?" Vaas, Far Cry 3
- "Just who the hell do you think you are!?" Kamina, Gurren Lagann
- "Excelsior!" Stan Lee
- "In Brightest Day, in Darkest Night, no Evil shall escape my Sight, let those who worship Evil's Might, Beware my Power, Green Lantern's Light!" Green Lantern Corps Oath.
- "THIS AINT A CUT SCENE BITCH!" Maximilian Dood, early Res. 4 playthrough
- "You are a man who is a horse who is a robot; making you MANHORSEMANBOT! Mmhmm..." Stuttering Craig, Screwattack
- "Of COURSE!" M. Bison, I'm not even going to sully this villains name even further; since this is the internet and the fact that everyone probably knows this one.
- "You see a lot of strange things as a bar tender. You see a lot of strange things at the pixel palace. So, I see a lot of strange things as a bar tender, at the pixel palace", Dominic at the pixel palace
- "Jolly co-operation", Brolaire of Astora (Bitches)
- "*Sniff* *Sniff* Cheddar *Sniff* and Saraca... Jeez I'm sorry Man..." Maximillian Dood, Assist Me! Final Season
- "Have you seen muh Dick?" Maximillian Dood
- "Aah geez you look like a puppy; a blown eviscerated puppy", Alucard, Hellsing Ultimate Abridged Episode 1
- "Nudist, BEEEEEEEAAAACH!!!" Aikurō Mikisugi, Kill La Kill
- "Kick your balls in through your teeth." Jeremy Jahns, JeremyJahns – Chrono Trigger game review
- "This gay kiss!" NerdCubed, Bully Let's Play: Episode 20
- "We are born of the blood, made men by the blood, undone by the blood. Our eyes are yet to open... Fear the old Blood." Master Willem, Bloodborne
- "Kid you're really cute, but I don't know what you're saying", Marlin, Finding Nemo.
- "On my business card, I am a corporate president. In my mind, I am a game developer. But in my heart, I am a gamer." Satoru Iwata, R.I.P. and hopefully we meet in the after life.

Things I don't like in characters/stories:
- "Idiotic characters" = Characters that are supposed to be funny by acting stupid, but the character is so plainly stupid you feel like hating him/her for their actions; prime example, the main characters of modern Spongebob Squarepants (Retarded as fuck).
- "Mary/Gary Sues" = *Cricket Sounds* Ehem... *Nudge* *Nudge* Oh right, well this is a topic that is quite awkward and a bit hypocrtical for me to talk about, but I guess my characters wouldn't classify as these type of characters since something I will be adding to the series. Although I do admit that those characters sometimes just take away from the fun.
- "OOC" = Dear Lord this is something I won't hold against someone, but if you are going to write a continuation or a re-write of some form of the story close to the orignal, then don't make an OOC. Even then please to do not go completely OOC, because I have seen people that have shifted their chosen characters ever so slightly to make it better, not make it into some crap that makes this website even worse.
- "Yaoi-pairings" = Fangirls, SHUT! THE! FUCK! UP! I don't give more and/or less than a rat's ass what you disgusting people think, but that is wrong. Seriously, you bitches are horny little teenage girls who, for some reason, need to vent their desire in the form of some twisted little stories containing non-cannon bullcrap, connections that are only based on things that can barely be called evidence/proof towards this unlikely pairing, and copious amount of porn that got referenced in one of YGOTAS episodes. Now if you can't believe me then listen to this non-rant, have any of you girls writing yaoi fanfics ever heard of a bromance? You know, BROTHERLY love that is meant as brothers in arms, and added in with respect and trust that when one Bro is down, the other Bro backs him up. To be honest, I don't want to make an essay about this since I can only be here to listen to what you girls/guys (?) think about the topic and arguing back at me for, because I don't want to be clear and listen to all there is that actually flows through your minds, and even if I can't get through it, well you might see something different either ways.
- "Useless-Plot-Convenient-Assholes/Plot device" = I personally will write one down just to understand and strengthen the drama for my story, but I personally have hated these types of characters that I would skip a whole chapter or more just to not read about them. Now what exactly are these type of people, well pretty much think guys/girls that think they're hotshit, but when the going gets tough, those people just drop and cry for mommy. They are also used in drama sequences for jealous related plot in drama stories.
- "Main-Character Death" = I loath the idea of Main-Character Deaths (Hell in reality any form of forced death (forced death = murder, killing, poisoning, any form of death that is not natural to the cycle of life, unless your a non-sentient animal)) and it brings me to my knees just to think about it, because to be honest I hate people dying as a whole.
- "One-sided/overused fanservice" = Alright, so my views on this topic has changed. Originally I had a problem for fanservice because I just found it excessive. But then again, Kill la Kill came along and to me the fanservice literally had no effect on me. So in general I can see this on two sides that I've categorized this in. First would be a one-sided fanservice, because honestly I find the entertainment product to be less manipulative if both sides of the sex get to enjoy the ride. The second one is to help-out on the first problem of fanservice, because honestly if there were no ground rules for the first restriction it might as well be porn at this point, just soft-core.
- "Filler" = Unless the filler is one episode long and not the length of a fucking season. I'm looking at you Naruto. I'm fine with it, really I am, but if it is way too long then go fuck off.
- "Forgetting past-events in the story" = I can't exactly remember when I exactly go through this type of bullshit, but I know I have and it sucks from people who really go into the story for its plot. 'Update' New 52, Y U NO REMEMBER KILLING JOKE?!
- "Sassy Smart-Asses" = Emphasis on the sassy part, because my character is in this category, but more on the logic and heartless type so this shit doesn't counteract with my character.
- "Lemon oriented" = I think this is self-explanatory, plus most of the stories that are oriented as such is either half-assed OOC characters or just stupid (like plot in a porno!).
- "Half-assed pairings" = *Sigh* Ok, here's the deal. I get the argument about "If you don't like it, don't watch it." and in all honesty I have to set right that that argument is so flawed. First, how can we know something is bad if we don't experience a multitude of new and certainly foreign things to try out and judge them in through our own opinions. Secondly, sometimes people want to look into something that they know might be bad, but sometimes people just simply like to give the benefit of the doubt that somehow it's changed, and likely to the ways of their liking [insert insanity speech here]. In all honesty, even then with those expectations are justified because making bad choices in general help people to thoroughly learn from mistakes and not to repeat the same actions again, by God I know I need to repeat a small mistake at no more than twice to finally get it through my head that I have indeed done something that was wrong (and sometimes downright stupid). Anyways, back to Half-assed pairings. I suppose in this case it's very much a heavily subjective view that even I can't fully objectively argue against, because to me things like SoujixNaoto fluff would be the same as NaotoxKanji fluff (I write Naoto in this scenario first because in my opinion she would be wearing the pants in that relationship). Though I haven't read much of the latter's fanfiction, I'm pretty sure people in my position who have a dull head and only like their OTP have a hard time accepting any other legitimate attempt in making their pairings a thing. Although I will say this, a funny-as-fuck crack pairing is always good to enjoy for a nice laugh or two.

Things I hate:
- "Hackers" = Son. Of an actual. BITCH! What the hell. I thought I would never meet with one of these despicable and heinous beings of the Internet, but to have one add in a Twilight, fucking porno inducing Twilight with bullshit Fable design into my favorites list is disgusting. I know I may be over reacting, because I have given some taboo inducing stories as my favorites, but they are all justified by good stories. Each one of them had their specialties, whether it be showing the complex thought of the characters at hand, or seemingly create a new lore that somewhat upgraded the old in my opinion. But what about Twilight. Well, look into the description I gave it, and tell me both the people who saw my profile and the fucking scum of the Internet, was that story anyway similar to those I have favorited? I thought so. Well in any case, I have changed my password into something bigger and will make certain that no hacker will ever get into my account again.
- "Time-skip" = Unless you're story is nucking futs (One Piece) or is perceived by the general as non-sensical but fun, do not ever use this as an excuse to completely change or under-develop characters effected by this plan. It's a breaking technique, with rare uses of ever working if the subject has already found a defined character for him/her/itself, and if it changes then even that is too much of a gamble. Only possible solution would be a road in the middle, or create a very good mystery behind the change: Follow-up, make his change more pronounced in the latter's case and make sure hammer that down, and then address the event(s) that happened that lead to the change, if the change even works to begin with.

Some links to stuff I found that needs some recognition:
- Title image =

Plans for this profile:

-THREE: Truth

P.S.: SOME OF THE SHIT I SAID IS NOT TRUE AND ONLY PART OF THE HINT OF WHAT'S TO COME, SO STICK AROUND.