Look alive,Sunshine. I'm Lyndsey,AKA RevolverPosion. I'm crazy,and I like a lot of stuff. For exzample:

Fanfiction: Dalton by CP Coulter,The Chatroom by IJustFellDownTheRabbithole,Trurh Or Dare by TheFatalIllusion and This Is A Pen by TotalDramaKindomHearts.

Charecters: PJO/HOO:Percy,Annabeth,Nico,Travis and Connor,Rachel(I calls her RED.),Luke,Piper,Mitchell,Lacey,Leo,Hazel,Frank,Reyna,Dakota,Gwen,Thaila,and others. THG: Katniss,Peeta(Haha,Peenis..),Prim(HOW COULD SHE DIE? THE ANGONY!),Haymich,Cinna,Octavia,Flavis,(The other lady,what's her name? Oh yeah!)Veina,Effie,Finnick(That was Fred Weasley all over again!),Annie(I wanted to hug her),Greasy Sae,and the children. I don't like Gale,I blame him for Prim's death. HP:Harry,Hermionie,Ron(The Golden Trio!),Bill,Charlie,Fred(HE IS NOT DEAD! I REFUSE TO BELIVE IT! IT WAS A TYPO!),George,Cedric,Luna(She makes a lot of sense.),Draco,Blaise,and others that I can't remember. I can't stand Ginny. Glee: Kurt,Blaine(KLAINE!),Rory,Brittany,Santana,(BRITTANA!) Puck,Artie,Quinn,Sam,Mercedes(FOX,Y U NO PUT SAMCEDES?). Dalton: Pretty much everyone except Adam and Laura. Supernatral: Dean,Castiel,Sam(Though he tends to piss me off...).

FAVORITE FICTIONAL CHARECTER HALL OF FAME!

Bascicly,my top favorite charecters. Travis and Conner Stoll(The Fred and Gorege of Camp Half-Blood!),Percy Jackson(The most heroic Seaweed Brain and my half brother!) Luke Castellan(I had to look on the Wikipiedia page for his last name! Anyway,sacrficing himself in the end? That was awesome!) Nico Di Angelo(Two words: Pure Badass.) Leo Valdez(FLAME ON!) Fred and Gorege Weasley(Do I need to explain?) Kurt Hummel (My fashion insperasion.) Blaine Anderson (Is that much hairgel really nessarry?) Dwight Houston (He needs to get in my bed. Seirously.) The Tweedles (See? NERF guns are not only for kids!) Finnick Odiar (Oh my gosh,he is NOT DEAD.) Dean Winshester (HE IS HOTHOTHOT.)

Music: My Chemical Romance,Panic! At The Disco,Adam Lambert,Maroon 5(Adam Levine is sexy :D) One Direction(What? They are cute and I love their music!) AWOLNATION,Green Day(Billie Joe is sexy for an old guy),All American Rejects,Neon Trees,Blink-182,Falling In Reverse,Avenged Sevenfoldothers that I'll add on later

Web Shows: Smosh(SHUT UP!),Tobuscus(Also Hothothot.),Shane Dawson(He's wierd,but funny!),Kids/Teens React,MyMusic(TheFineBros!) others...

Fanfiction stories deitails/outfits:

Somebody That I Used To Know: A Glee/Dalton fic. An old friend of the Tweedles comes to visit them. Outfits: None yet. I'm trying to figure out how to make another chapter.

Wait,Ray Toro Is My Uncle? Lisa Count's life is tunned upside down when she discovers that her uncle is in her favorite band! Outfits: The shirt: Once again,trying to figure out how to add a chapter.

We protected the stone.

We opened the chamber.

We freed the prisoner.

We entered the tournament (and won the cup).

We fought for The Order.

We discovered the Prince.

We found the hallows (and beat the crap out of You-Know-Who).

Remember Diagon Alley, The Burrow, and Hogwarts

Remember the chosen one-the Boy Who Lived.

Just because the books and movies are over, doesn't mean his legacy is.

HARRY POTTER FOREVER!

1. YOUR GANGSTA NAME:(first 3 letters of real name plus izzle): Lynizzle

2. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (color and animal): Pink Panther

3. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, and current street name): Dat'elle Hubbel

4. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, last 3 letters of mom's maiden name): Davlyion

5. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (color, drink): Black Punch

6. YOUR ARAB NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms maiden name, 3rd letter of your dads middle name, 1st letter of a siblings first name, last letter of your moms middle name): Yvehma

7. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mothers middle name): Amiea

8. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one your pets): Black Winter

9. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (fruit, and something that can go wrong) Cherry Driver

10. YOUR PIRATE NAME: (color, pirate accessory ) Silver Sword

11. YOUR STARBUCKS NAME (a name different from your real one you use at starbucks) Voldermort

12. YOUR KILLJOY NAME (just two random words, like Party Poison, or Jet Star) Revolver Posion

13. YOUR DJ NAME (a word that means cool, any two letters, a number) Epic LS9

IMPORTANT- Teenage girls who are NOT in love with Twilight are fast becoming an endangered species. If you are part of this endangered species, copy and paste this in your profile. :D :D :D

If you are a witch/wizard and your Hogwarts letter is just a little late put this on your profile!

I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.

One of the greatest pleasures in life is doing what people say you can't.

A good story is an old story with a new twist.

Growing old is manditory. . .growing up is optional.

Laughter is good for the soul...and for creeping people out.

I can quote Hetalia characters, got a problem? (PASTAAA!)

I was wondering why the Frisbee was getting bigger and then it hit me.

Is that your girl-friend/boy-friend/gender-neutral chibi thing?

Boredom/free-time =longer profile (i.e. adding more random crap, like I'm doing right now)

Did you know the average person only reads three books per year? If you do not even believe it is possible to read that little, copy and paste this to your profile.

(\)_(/) (='.'=) This is Bunny. (")_(") Copy and paste Bunny into your profile to help him gain world domination!

1.My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE."If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."

2. My mother taught me RELIGION. "You better pray that will come out of the carpet."

3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"

4. My mother taught me LOGIC. "Because I said so, that's why.

5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."

7. My mother taught me IRONY. "Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck?"

10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."

14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."

16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home."

17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You are going to get it when you get home!"

18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way."

19. My mother taught me ESP. "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me."

21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. "Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"

24. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you get to be my age, you'll understand."

25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

50 Things NOT to do at Hogwarts

1. I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor will I insist that their House colors indicate that they are “covered in bees”.

2. No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can do, I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class.

3. Growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is not “an extra credit project for Herbology”.

4. “I’ve heard every possible joke about Oliver Wood’s name” is not a challenge.

5. I am not allowed to attempt to breed a liger.

6. I will not go to class skyclad.

7. The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball.

8. I will not use Umbridge’s quill to write “I told you I was hardcore”.

9. I will stop referring to showering as “giving Moaning Myrtle an eyeful”.

10. Polishing my wand in the common room is acceptable. “Polishing my wand” in the common room is not.

11. If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.

12. House elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers.

13. Starting a betting pool on the fate of this year’s Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher is tasteless and tacky, not a clever money-making concept.

14. I will not start every Potions class by asking Professor Snape if today’s project is suitable for use as a sexual lubricant.

15. Adding the name “Bueller” to Professor Binns’ roster is not funny. (I would do this XD)

16. “Springtime for Voldemort” is not an acceptable suggestion for the class play.

17. Seamus Finnegan is not “after me Lucky Charms”.

18. I will not refer to the Weasley twins as “bookends”.

19. I will not refer to the Patil twins as “bookends”.

20. The Slytherin prefect is named Draco Malfoy, not “Rocky Horror.”

21. It is exceptionally tasteless to tell Professor Lupin that “Once you go Black, you never go back.”

22. I will not call Lucius Malfoy “Jareth”.

23. I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class.

24. I am not to refer to the Potions classroom as “Kitchen Stadium”.

25. I will not tell Ron and Hermione to “Get a room” whenever they start to fight.

26. The Forbidden Forest is forbidden for a reason.

27. I am not a tribble Animagus.

28. I am allowed to have a toad, rat, cat, or owl. I am not allowed to have a reticulated python, snow leopard, Tasmanian devil, or piranha.

29. I do not weigh the same as a duck.

30. Remus Lupin does not want a flea collar.

31. Sirius Black is not #24601.

32. I will not lick Trevor.

33. I will stop asking the Arithmancy teacher what the square root of -1 is.

34. I am not being repressed.

35. Calling Lucius Malfoy “Luscious Mouthful” is just plain gross.

36. I will not change the password to the prefects’ bath to “Makes getting clean almost as much fun as getting dirty”.

37. There is no such thing as an Invisibility Thong.

38. I am not a Pinball Wizard.

39. Asking “How do you keep a Gryffindor in suspense?” and walking away is only funny the first time.

40. I will not offer to pose nude for Colin Creevey.

41. I will not offer to pose nude for Dean Thomas.

42. It is a bad idea to tell Professor Snape he takes himself too seriously.

43. It is a bad idea to tell Professor McGonagall she takes herself too seriously.

44. Sir Cadogan is not one of the knights who say “NI”.

45. I will not offer to prepare tandoori owl.

46. I will stop asking when we will learn to make “Love Potion Number Nine”.

47. I will not ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick.

48. I will not greet Professor McGonagall with “What’s new, pussycat?”

49. There is not now, nor has there ever been, a fifth House at Hogwarts, and I am not a member of that house, nor am I its founder.

50. I will not take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.

51. "Beaters do it with Wood" is not funny,even if the only people not laughing are the Weasley twins and Oliver.

Favorite Quotes From Avatar the Last Airbender

"Hey, Zuko here! But...I guess you already knew that..."

"You're Zuko's costumes great! Except your scars on the wrong side," "The scar's not on the wrong sde!"

"Do they have bathrooms in the spirit world?" "As a matter of fact, they do not,"

"I knew it was only a matter of time! Appa ATE Momo!"

I promise to remember Harry

Each time I see lightning

And I promise to remember Ron

When I see red hair that's blinding

I promise to obey school rules

For Hermione's sake of course

And I promise to remember Malfoy

When my heart fills with remorse

I promise to remember Ginny

Whenever I see an adoring fan

And I promise to remember Neville

When someone says no, but they say 'I can'

I promise to remember Luna

Whenever I see the moon

And I promise to remember Fred and George

When I see someone acting like a loon

I promise to remember Dumbledore

When I see someone with long, grey hair.

And I promise to remember Molly

When someone tells me they care

I promise to remember Tom Riddle

Whenever I am scared

And I promise to remember Hedwig

When someone says 'I have always cared'

Yes I promise to love Harry Potter

Wherever I may go

So that all may see my obsession

Because I know what the Potter fans know.

Harry Potter isn't an obsession...

it's a way of life you know...

THINGS YOU DON"T WANT TO HEAR DURING SUGURY
1.OOPS!
2.Has anybody survived 500ml of this stuff before?
3.if this is his spleen, then what's that?
4.come back here with that, bad dog!
5.DAMN! page 47 of the manual is missing!
6.wait a minute, my manual doesn't say that.
7.What edition is your manual?
8.Steril, schmerial.
9.the floors clean,right?
10.nurse, could you stop that thing from beating? it's throwing my concentraion off.
11.let's hurry this up, i don't want to miss Baywatch.
12.FIRE FIRE! EVERYBODY GET OUT!

Ouran Host Club Personality Type!

Tamaki Prince Type:

You are French

You’re a very romantic person

You flirt a lot with girls/boys.

Easily fooled by things that wouldn't fool most.

You're overly eccentric in everything you do.

You care about your family deeply even if they don't return the feelings

Your birthday is April 8th

You're slow when it comes to your own feelings.

Total: 1

Kyoya Cool Type:

You wear glasses

You are known for being "evil"

Your favourite foods are anything spicy

You excel in everything you do Your birthday is November 22.

You hate waking up in the morning. (Sometimes)

You never like to do anything unless it has a benefit

Total: 2

Hunny Loli Shota Type:

You're the shortest out of your friends.(Other way around)

You love cakes and sweets.

You have a stuffed animal that has special meaning to you.

You are/have taken a martial arts class

You are close to your cousins.

You look a lot younger than you are.(Other way around)

You're born on February 29th

Your favourite subject is math

Total:4

Mori Wild Type:

You're the tallest out of your friends

You only talk when you need to

You're protective of people you care for.

Your favorite food is Japanese food

When bad things happen you tend to blame yourself a lot.

Your birthday is May 5th

You're not much of a leader but more of a follower

Total: 4

Hikaru Devil Type:

You and your sibling have a strong bond

You're a very cynical person

You like to mess with your sibling

You're the oldest sibling

Your birthday is June 9th

You like Italian food

You get jealous easily

You don't make friends easily

Total:2

Kaoru Devil Type:

You like to play games

Favorite subject, English

You enjoy cosplay

You're nicer than your siblings

Your birthday is June 9th

You're very forgiving

You'd rather give someone something and go without to make that person happy

You like playing tricks on people

Total:6

Haruhi Natural Type:

You don't care about trivial things like appearance

You're tight with money

You get along with guys well

You're blunt about everything

You're an excellent cook.

You have a hard time understanding love

Your birthday is February 4th (No, but extremely close. It's the second. Ground Hogs day!)

People feel like they can open up and talk to you easily

Total:4

Result: Yay! I'm Kaoru!

A is for Academy, which is where the Ouran students attend

B is for Boy-Lolita, which is Mitsukuni Haninozuka

C is for Cosplay, which the Hosts do every day

D is for Debt, which is 8 million yen

E is for Emo Corner, which is Tamaki's depression spot

F is for Female, which is Haruhi's true gender

G is for Guy, which Haruhi has to dress and act like to pay off her debt

H is for Hikaru, who is the confused one of the Hitachiin Twins

I is for Innocent, which Honey claims to be

J is for Jealousy, which Hikaru expresses towards Haruhi and Arai

K is for Kaoru, who is the sweetest of the Hitachiin Twins (and the best...)

L is for Love, which is the feeling that Hikaru doesn't quite understand

M is for Mori, who is the strong and silent type

N is for Nekozawa, who will put a curse on you if you don't watch your back

O is for Ootori, which is a big name in the medical business

P is for Puppet, and its name is Belzeneff

Q is for Quiet, which basically describes Mori

R is for Roses, which every Host Club member has in their own color

S is for Swimsuit, which the Hitachiin brothers would like to see Haruhi wear

T is for Tamaki, who considers himself as the "King" of the Host Club

U is for Usa-chan, which is the name of Honey's stuffed bunny

V is for Vocals, which Renge uses a lot

W is for Wonderland, where Haruhi got stuck.

X is for X-Ray Vision, which the Hitachiin Brothers wish they had. (...yeah, i know they do...they probably already have it. that's what the smirks are for. -_-)

Y is for Yaoi, which the Ouran show has a lot of thanks to the Hitachiin Twins

Z is for the Zuka Club, which Haruhi was almost forced to join

If you have never heard or seen the Ouran Alphabet before until now, copy and paste this into your profile

Random quotes from Gerard Way!

"Everyone expects you to act like a kid so you might as well do so...go throw a TV out of your hotel window."

"One day your life is gonna flash before your eyes...make sure it's worth watching."

singing* "Everybody tie your shoes, clap clap! Everybody tie your shoes, clap clap! Everybody tie your shoes, I don't care about you, everybody tie your shoes, clap clap!" XD

Interviewer: Bob, Frank, Ray, and Mikey are hanging on the edge of a cliff. Who would you save first?

Gerard: I'd jump too

When God said, "Let there be light", Gerard Way said, "say please."

You know you're a My Chemical Romance Freak when

1. Your carpet is soaked with drool after watching them play on TV

2. You cry when u hear them play your favorite song live

3. You hear someone say My Chemical Romance and you snap to attention

4. You stand your ground and defend them when someone tries to criticize them

5. You feel like burning the TRL building down

6. You read a story and claim you saw one of the band members names, though its not there

7. You have a MCR song for every point in your day

8. You lick the TV when there on it, Mmm..MCR

9. You recite the words to the song when someone even mutters just a word of it.

10. You Live by the words of My Chemical Romance

11. You've asked your parents millions of times if you could make MCR your religion!

MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE BIBLE

Gerard Way puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".

Mikey Way can slam revolving doors.

The chief export of The Frank Iero is pain.

Mikey Way counted to infinity...twice.

Frank Iero can divide by Zero.

The grass is always greener on the other side. Unless Gerard Way has been there, then its soaked with tears and blood.

The Frank Iero once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.

Gerard Way sleeps with a night light. Not because Gerard Way is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Gerard Way.

Mikey Way is the reason Waldo is hiding.

A Tsunami is water running away from Bob Bryar.

Bob Bryar doesn't get brain freeze. Slurpees know when to back the fuck off.

Mikey Way can speak braille.

Jeeves asks Ray Toro.

If The Bob Bryar is late, time better slow the fuck down.

Geico saved 15 a year by switching to Gerard Way.

Ray Toro went back in time and stopped the JFK assination by catching the bullet in mid air. JFK's head just exploded in sheer amazement.

Gerard Way has to sort his laundry into three loads: darks, whites, and bloodstains.

The most effective form of suicide known to man is to type "Frank Iero" into Google and hit "I'm Feeling Lucky!"

Jesus walked on water. Gerard Way walked on Jesus.

When Frank Iero gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.

Gerard Way doesn't use pick-up lines, he simply says, "Now."

Mikey Way is like a Tsunami, if you can see him coming it's already too late.

Bob Bryar ate the Stay Puff Marshmellow man.

Ray Toro didn't vote for Pedro. He deported him.

Ways to Tell If You're a Real My Chemical Romance Fan

1.MCR fans know more songs than "Welcome to the Black Parade."

2. Real MCR fans know Gerard Way's brother's name.

3. Real MCR fans shout 'YES!' when one of their songs comes on.

4. Real MCR fans punch their cousins/brothers/parents/friends for dissing Gerard's hair.

5. Real MCR fans punch their cousins/brothers/parents/friends for dissing Gerard in general.

6. Real MCR fans know the names of everyone in the band and what they do.

7. Real MCR fans shop for hours just to find a jacket like the band's have for a MCR concert.

8. Real MCR fans take time to right on the front of all their underwear "I love Gerard."

9. Real MCR fans ask their mom "What's for dinner?" and are disappointed when she doesn't say Gerard.

10. Real MCR fans start smoking because they think they will be how like Frank and Gerard. not really

11. Real MCR fans ask for Bob the Bryar for Christmas and cry when they don't get him.

12. Real MCR fans do dirty things with their MCR action figures and are proud to admit it.

13. Real MCR fans sleep with a picture of MCR and actually have to wipe off the drool stains.

14. Real MCR fans piss themselves when they see them... on the television.

15. Real MCR fans would admit to let them rape you.

16. Real MCR fans go in a rendition of Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge when they hear a guy in a restaurant say "So Long"

17. Real MCR fans have this on their profile.

18. Real MCR fans giggle everytime Gerard Way says the word 'way' in his songs

19. Real MCR fans will scream "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, insert band member name here!" on his birthday, regardless of how quiet the room is.

20. Real MCR fans watch "Life On the Murder Scene" twice a day then apologize to plants.

21. Real MCR fans often zone out, listening to MCR in their heads, and when someone asks them a question they scream the lyrics they were just thinking of.

22. Real MCR fans write 'my' and 'romance' around the word 'chemical' when in science class.

23. Real MCR fans when hearing any word even slightly associated with MCR on the television, instantly freak out and turn up the volume.

24. Real MCR fans eat skittles and drink coke zero three times daily.

25. Real MCR fans have every MCR picture possible saved on their computer, and admit it proudly.

26. Real MCR fans have actually read and re-read and re-re-read etc. any MCR webpages they could find.

27. Real MCR fans can listen to a MCR song repeatedly and not get tired of said song. (no matter how many times you listen!)

28. MCR fans hear New Jersey and instantly think MCR MCR MCR MCR MCR!

29. Real MCR fans try their hardest to mention MCR in any project at school.

30. Real MCR fans spaz out when they see the word 'way' in books, on trucks, anywhere.

Put this on your profile if you love MCR! _ * _ _ _ _ _My Chemical_ _Romance_ _.

Copy and paste this onto your profile if you hate Cartoon Network for the cancellation of Teen Titans! (Well, I still watch it..)

Ninety-eight percent of teenagers have tried smoking pot. If you're one of the two percent who hasn't, copy this and paste it in your profile.

95% of teens would be crying if Justin Bieber was on a 100 ft tall building about to jump. If you are one of the 5% who would yell "DO A FLIP!", add this to your profile.

92% of American teens would die if Ambercrombie and Fitch/American eagle told them that it was uncool to breathe. if you are one of the 8 that would stand there laughing, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you hate Duncan from TDI/WT for kissing Gwen and making Courtney mad,copy and paste this on your profile.

The girl you just called fat? She is overdosing on diet pills.
The girl you just called ugly? She spends hours putting makeup on hoping people will like her.
The boy you just tripped? He is abused enough at home.
See that man with the ugly scars? He fought for his country.
That guy you just made fun of for crying? His mother is dying.
Put this as you're profile if you're against bullying.
I bet 95% of you wont put this on your profile, but I'm sure the people with a heart and backbone will.

If you are madly in love with a fictional character copy this onto your profile! (Damm,that's a long list.)

If you've ever screamed at a book or the TV copy this!

If you've ever done the evil laugh copy this onto your profile.

If you've ever started singing in a silent room copy this onto your profile.

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "Where to begin?"

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think those kids should just give the Rabbit his cereal put this in your profile!

If you think your insane because you say so, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile

If you personally think you are a demigod, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever crashed into a wall, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever ran into an inanimate object and apologized, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever tripped on air, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have ever pushed a door that says "pull" or vise versa, copy and paste this to your profile.

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile.

If there are times where you just want to annoy someone for the heck of it copy this into your profile

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of the effects, copy and paste this into your profile.

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile.

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile!

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever zoned out for five consecutive minutes, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.

Ninety-Five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimieKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, That Bloody Demon, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienel, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmuisc, piratesswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minamoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy the Mary-Sue Slayer, Harry's Girl 01031992, Dawn over the Valley, Captain Samantha Lovegood, LilyGinnyBlack, Lilyre, Hermione16, iLoVeMoOnYnPaDfOot, Someone aka Me,Yourcool79, Give up your Prejudices, MyNameIsCAB, Shatchi, LE Trex, ImmaBeatYouWithaCrowbar, LeoValdezgirl77,XxxImNotOkayxxX

COPY AND PASTE THIS ONTO YOUR PROFILE IF YOU LOOOOOOVE The Outsiders! :D :D :D :D :D

If you believe in God and are 100% proud of it then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are NOT like other girls, then copy and paste this into your profile

96% of girls would cry if they saw Justin Bieber about to jump from the Empire State Building. If you're in the 4% that would bring a cooler, a lawnchair, and shout, "DO A FLIP!" then copy and paste this in your profile.

If you love greasers, are a self-confessed greaser fan, and are a proud member of TEAM GREASER and can't stand Socs...COPY AND PASTE!

You say Edward, I say Ponyboy.
You say Bella, I say Sandy.
You say Jacob, I say Sodapop.
You say Washington, I say Tulsa.
You say Vampires, I say Greasers.
You say "How romantic," I say "Let's do it for Johnny!"
Put this in your profile if you love The Outsiders. :D

If you wish that a fictional character was real, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you know in fact Sodapop Curtis is BLOND, but don't the heck mind when Rob Lowe played him, copy and paste.

If you think we should all go back to the 50's-early 60's, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you support Sodapop Curtis, copy and paste this to your profile.

I've been diagnosed
with Obsessive Curtis
Disorder put this on your
profile if you've caught it too!

I'm A Greaser, A JD And A Hood
I Blacken The Name Of Our Fair City
I Beat Up People
I Rob Gas Stations
I Am A Menace To Society
Man, Do I Have Fun!

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, SpottedLilly, Alleyanna Cullen, danceswithwings119, gottaluvtwilight,freexflyer, Green.Winged.Mistress, MoonStarWithWings, Yourcool79, MyNameIsCAB, Shatchi, Gabby510, twilightobsessedOECD, Aceraptor123, Person95,therealmax,FaXnEsSisADDICTION(kelsey),LE Trex, ImmaBeatYouWithaCrowbar, LeoValdezgirl77,XxxImNotOkayxxX

A black man walked into a restaurant and sat down. A white waiter approached him. The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen, sir...When I was born I was BLACK, when I grew up I was BLACK, when I'm sick I'm BLACK, when I go into the sun I'm BLACK, when I'm cold I'm BLACK, when I die I'll be BLACK. But you, sir, when you're born you're PINK, when you grow up you're WHITE, when you're sick, you're GREEN, when you go in the sun you turn RED, when you're cold you turn BLUE, and when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" Post this on your profile if you hate racism

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs cpoy and psate it in yuor pofrile.

I am the girl kicked out of her home because I confided in my mother that I am a lesbian.

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother tight through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried our daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I have ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.

We are the couple who had the realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting the management called on me.

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court says I am an unfit mother because I now live with another woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I didn’t have to always deal with society hating me.

I am the man who stopped attending church, not because I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most, love

.:Repost this if you believe homophobia is wrong:.

Friend:calls your parents Mrs. and Mr.

Best Friend:calls your parents mom and dad

Friend:has never seen you cry

Best Friend:has always had the best shoulder to cry on

Friend:never asks for anything to eat or drink

Best Friend:opens the fridge and makes herself at home

Friend:asks you to write down your number

Best Friend:they ask you for your number (because they can't remember it)

Friend:borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back

Best Friend:has a closet full of your stuff

Friend:only knows a few things about you

Best Friend:could write a biography on your life

Friend:will leave you behind if that's what the crowd is doing

Best Friend:will always go with you

True Friend:

You will stay by me

When my bf breaks my heart

You will let me cry on your shoulder

When I need you to be alone with my bf

You will stay away...but block the door

If I get drunk,

You will drive us home.

When my mom and dad kick me out,

You will let me stay with you.

If someone calls me names,

You will kick their ass.

If I want to smoke,

You will take my pack.

When I lose my money gambling,

I know you'll give me money (not for gambling)

If I get put in jail,

You will be right next to me.

If I get killed,

You won't be at my funeral.

You will be killing whoever killed me.

And...

I would do the same for you!

Best friends.

True Friends Forever!

Girl:I'm always here for you.

Boy:I know.. :(

Girl:What's wrong?

Boy:I like this girl so much...

Girl:Talk to her

Boy:I don't know.She won't ever like me...

Girl:Don't say that.You're amazing.

Boy:I just want her to know how I feel.

Girl:Then tell her.

Boy:She won't like me...

Girl:How do you know that?

Boy:I can just tell...

Girl:Well just tell her.

Boy:What should I say?

Girl:Tell her how much you like her.

Boy:I tell her that daily.

Girl:What do you mean?

Boy:I'm always with her.I love her.

Girl:I know how you feel.I have the same problem.But he'll never like me.

Boy:Wait.Who do you like?

Girl:Oh,some boy.

Boy:Oh...she won't like me,either.

Girl:She does.

Boy:How do you know?

Girl:Because,who wouldn't like you?

Boy:You.

Girl:You're wrong,I love you.

Boy:I love you,too.

Girl:So are you going to talk to her?

Boy:I just did...

A friend is like a flower,

a rose to be exact,

Or maybe like a brand new gate

that never comes unlatched.

A friend is like an owl,

both beautiful and wise.

Or perhaps a friend is like a ghost,

whose spirit never dies.

A friend is like a heart that goes

strong until the end.

Where wuld we be in this world

if we didn't have a friend?

You say,I say:

You say Twilight,

I say Harry Potter.

You say vampires,

I say wizards.

You say Bella,

I say Hermione.

You say Jacob Black,

I say Remus Lupin.

You say the Volturi,

I say Lord Voldemort.

You say Stephenie Meyer,

I say J.K Rowling.

You say Renesmee,the half-blood vanpire,

I say Severus Snape,the half-blood prince

You say Forks,

I say Hogwarts.

You say Edward Cullen,

I say Harry Potter.

You call me weird,

I say I'm a fan,so get over it!

There was a little boy

He found a picture of a girl on the sidewalk

As time went on he got married

And still he kept the picture.

His wife asked,"Honey,where did you get this picture?"

"I don't know,why?"

"Because I lost this picture when I was nine..."

When a guy says you're HOT

He's looking at your body.

When a guy says you're PRETTY

He's looking at your face.

When a guy says you're BEAUTIFUL

He's looking at your heart.

If you're asking if I need you,

The answer is forever.

If you're asking if I'll leave you,

The answer is never.

If you're asking what I value,

The answer is you.

If you're asking if I love you,

The answer is I do.

When I first saw you,

I was afraid to meet you,

When I first met you,

I was afraid to kiss you,

When I first kissed you,

I was afraid to love you.

But now that I love you,

I'm afraid to lose you.

From start to finsh I wonder why

The cuts look good in this messed up lie

The blood that trickles down my arm

People all stare at the girl who self-harms

"The emo" they call me

I turn to my name

They act out slicing their wrists

I hang my head in shame

I can't help my feelings

Of being alone

I hide myself for the day

Just longing to go home

I sprawl on my bed

With my razor in hand

And take myself away

To a much better land

I stare in the mirror

And let myself cry

Looking forwars to the day

That I finally die

Best Friends:

Through tears and fights,

Through smiles,

I knew everything

Would be alright,

Through love and hate,

Through betrayal and debate,

For you I will always have faith,

Being your sister(me brother) as well as your

Best friend I knew

This friendship wouldn't end,

By your side I will always stand

And you'll stand by mine,too

Because that's what best friends do,

So no matter what happens with us

In life,

Through all of the wrongs

And all of the rights,

I'm her for you to be a best friend that's true,

Cause I love you and that's what

Best friends do.

Friend:calls your parents Mrs. and Mr.

Best Friend:calls your parents mom and dad

Friend:has never seen you cry

Best Friend:has always had the best shoulder to cry on

Friend:never asks for anything to eat or drink

Best Friend:opens the fridge and makes herself at home

Friend:asks you to write down your number

Best Friend:they ask you for your number (because they can't remember it)

Friend:borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back

Best Friend:has a closet full of your stuff

Friend:only knows a few things about you

Best Friend:could write a biography on your life

Friend:will leave you behind if that's what the crowd is doing

Best Friend:will always go with you

FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.

REAL FRIENDS: Are the reason you have no food.

FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr./Mrs.

REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM.

FAKE FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong.

REAL FRIENDS: Will sit next to you saying “Damn … we really messed up … but that sure was fun!”

FAKE FRIENDS: Never seen you cry.

REAL FRIENDS: Cry with you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.

REAL FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it’s yours.

FAKE FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.

REAL FRIENDS: Can write a book about you, with direct quotes from you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.

REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door.

REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say “I’M HOME!”

FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile.(AKA. Drinking Buddies)

REAL FRIENDS: Are for life.

FAKE FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.

REAL FRIENDS: Not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what’s wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!

FAKE FRIENDS: Make you say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.

REAL FRIENDS: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out.

FAKE FRIENDS: Will ignore this.

REAL FRIENDS: Will repost this

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or the vise versa copy this into your profile

If you ever tripped over your own feet, copy this into your profile

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

Either grab a writing utensil and a piece of paper or just remember your answers. Apparently Don't peek at the answers, because it ruins it completely D:

1) If you are strait write the first name of a person of the opposite sex that pops into you head. If your gay, write the name of the person of the same sex that pops into your head. If you bi, than write the name of the first person that pops into your head... (it has to be the first)

2) What is you favorite color out of red,black,blue,green,yellow?

3) Your first initial?

4) Your month of birth?

5) Which color do you like more,black or white?

6) Name a person of the same sex as yours.

7) Your favorite number?

8) Do you like California or Florida more?

9) Do you like the lake or the ocean more?

10) Write down a wish(a realistic one)

ARE YOU DONE? IF SO SCROLL DOWN. (DON'T CHEAT...FOOL...)

THE ANSWERS;

1. You are completely in love with this person.

2. If you choose:

Red-You are alert and you life is full of love.

Black-You are conservative and aggressive

Green-Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back

Blue-You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you love.

Yellow-You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.

3.If you initial is:

A-K You have a lot of love and friendship in your life.

L-R You try to live you life to the maximum and your love life is soon to blossom.

S-Z You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4.If you were born in:

Jan-Mar: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you will fall in love with someone totally unexpected.

April-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last very long but the memories will last forever.

July-Sept: You will have a great year and will experience a major life changing experience for the good.

Oct-Dec: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soul mate.

5.If you choose;

Black: Your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard at the time but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.

White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do anything for you, but you may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend.

7. This is how many close friends you will have in your lifetime.

8. If you choose:

California: You like adventure

Florida: You are a laid back person

9.If you choose:

Lake: You are loyal to your friends and to you love. And you are very reserved.

Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.

10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday.

Sad

I was walking around in a store. I saw a cashier hand this little boy his money back saying "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll." Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?'' The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' Then she asked him to stay there for 5 minutes while she went to look around. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to. "It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for this Christmas. She was so sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her." I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus will bring it to her after all, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there." His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'' My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall." Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me." "I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister." Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "What if we checked again, just in case you do have enough money?'' "OK" he said "I hope that I have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!" Then he looked at me and added "I asked yesterday before I slept for God to make sure I have enough money to buy this doll so that mommy can give it to my sister. He heard me!''"I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'' "My mommy loves white roses." A few minutes later, the old lady came again and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local newspaper article: 2 days ago, which mentioned of a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car, where there was one young lady and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-assisting machine, because the young lady would not be able to recover from the coma. Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young lady had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever. The love that this little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him. Now you have 2 choices: 1) Repost this message. 2) Ignore it as if it never touched you. have a heart.

10 Ways to Annoy Carlisle Cullen:

10. Tell him only to address you in a cute English accent.

9.Call him Carlisle, but be sure to pronounce the “s”. When he corrects you, give him a weird look and tell him the “q” is silent.

8.Ask if blondes really do have more fun.

7. Inquire as to what he actually does on his night shift on the hospital, with all the pretty nurses in the ER.

6. Instead of telling him to “get lost” in an argument, tell him to swim to France.

5. When he annoys you, respond with “times have changed, old man”.

4. Ask what type of superhuman power compassion is – what does he do in a fight? Love the enemy to death?

3. Leap out from behind the desk in his study when he isn’t expecting it and spray him with Holy Water.

2.Call him McSteamy or McDreamy.

And the Number One way to annoy Carlisle Cullen?

1. Run around the Emergency Room screaming “I’ve been bitten! I’ve been bitten!”

10 Ways to Annoy Jasper Hale:

10. Beg him not to eat you.

9. Inform him that he seems to be the “depressed” Cullen.

8. Go up to him, look him in the eye and ask if he is hungry.

7.Spell his name with two “a”’s (Jaspar) and call him Jaspar Cullen. When he objects, saying his name is Jasper Hale, wave your hand at him and tell him all that blood must havegone to his brain.

6. Tell him only girls feel emotions. Then giggle and run away.

5. Dress up in a cape and fangs and leap out in front of him when he is least expecting it, proclaiming you have come to suck his blood.

4. Send out waves of lust and see how he reacts.

3. When he gets too close made your fingers into the sign of the cross and cry, “The power of Christ compels you!”.

2. Splatter red paint all over his and Alice’s room and videotape his reaction.

And the Number One way to annoy Jasper Hale?

1. Whenever he says anything, snap to attention, shout “Sir, yes sir!” and salute, army style.

10 Ways to Annoy Edward Cullen:

10. Sing “Discovery Channel” by the Bloodhound Gang in your head whenever he is near.

9.Hotwire his Volvo and take it on a joyride.

8. Tell him the relationship he is having with Bella is practically pedophilia and he could be sent to jail for it.

7. Ask how Tanya is.

6. End every argument with “Bite me, Edward.”

5. Call him Romeo both behind his back and to his face.

4. Whenever he complains or argues, reply with “What are you gonna do Edward? Go to Italy?”

3.Tell him his hair isn’t bronze, it’s ginger, and he should stop denying himself – he’s a ranga.

2.Whenever he leaves a room or says goodbye, get down on your knees and beg him not to go, not again.

And the Number One way to annoy Edward Cullen?

1.Take his silver cell phone and change the ringtone to “Like a Virgin” by Madonna.

10 ways to annoy Emmett Cullen:

10. Tell him he looks like a creepy stalker rapist.

9. Inform him, as politely as possible, that he has grizzly in his teeth.

8. Ask who wears the pants in his relationship.

7. Try to stab him through the heart with a stake.

6.Tell him brawn is out, scrawn is in.

5. Inquire as to how he feels to be the least-liked Cullen male.

4. When he is around, wonder aloud what Rosalie calls him in bed.

3. Ask if he is overcompensating for something with that jeep.

2. Ask if he is overcompensating for something with those muscles

And the Number One way to annoy Emmet Cullen?

1.When he denies the above claims, respond with "That's not what Rosalie said!"

10 ways to annoy Alice Cullen:

10. Take her credit cards and shopping vouchers, hold them above your head and tell her to "Jump for them."

9. Tell her if she were just a few centimeters shorter she could legally be a midget.

8. Wear the trashiest possible clothing whenever you can.

7. Tie her up in a straight jacket. When she protests, tell her she needs to go back to the loony bin.

6. When you go into the sun with her, fall into a twitching heap on the ground and moan "I'm melting."

5. Pelt her with cloves of garlic.

4.When she gets a vision, ask if her "spidey senses" are tingling

3. Trip her and ask her if she saw it coming.

2. Ask her what you will be doing in five minutes every ten minutes.

And the Number One way to annoy Alice Cullen?

1.E-mail her dozens of application forms for the position of speaker on psychic hotlines.

10 ways to annoy Bella Swan:

10. Ask about Eric.

9. Ask about Mike.

8. Ask about Jacob.

7. Ask about Edward.

6. After asking about all these boys, inquire as to how much she is paying them, and where in the white pages she looked for fake fan boys.

5. When she complains about not being a vampire, throw glitter on her and claim she sparkles just like a vampire in the sun.

4.Ask if the thought of Edward biting her makes her... happy.

3. Say that since Edward is technically dead, she is into necrophilia. Tell her that is sick and wrong and, she should stop with her weird fetishes.

2. Tell her we all know the real reason she married Edward- the honeymoon.

And the Number One way to annoy Bella Swan?

1. Tell her that you and Jacob imprinted on each other, and are getting married. Tell her you are pregnant, and will be with him forever. Video tape the reaction.

10 Ways to Annoy Rosalie Hale:

10. Tell her that, because everyone thinks she and Jasper are twins, they should get together. When she asks why, say that Incest is in at the moment.

9. Call her “Ice Queen” behind her back and to her face.

8. Whenever she argues anything, respond with “Whatever, bimbo.”

7. Claim that being a human ain’t so great.

6. When she argues the above claim, respond with “Whatever, bimbo.”

5. Try to exorcise her and her evil ways.

4. Tell everyone that Edward didn’t go to Italy because Rosalie said Bella was dead – he went to Italy because he envisioned Rosalie’s ugly face.

3.Call her “Hoe-salie” at least once, to her face.

2. Remind her that Edward chose a pathetic human girl over her.

And the Number One way to annoy Rosalie Hale?

1.Steal her silver cell phone and change the ringtone to “Roxanne” by The Police. When she asks why the hell you did it, say that she reminds you of Roxanne.

10 Ways to Annoy Esme Cullen:

10.Let it slip what Carlisle really does during his night shifts at the hospital, with all of the pretty nurses.

9. Tell her all about the names of your future children, when you want to have them, what genders you want them to be, etc.

8. Ask her if her hair looks like caramel, does it taste like caramel?

7.Politely ask if Carlisle asks her to dress up as “Nurse Naughty” in the bedroom and if he demands she calls him “Doctor Dreamy”

6.Tell her that Carlisle is much too old for her, and that he is clearly a cradle-snatcher or phedophile.

5. Take a chunk of her hair, put it in a blender with milk and hand back the final product, claiming it’s a caramel milkshake.

4.Tell her what the nurses at the hospital really think of Carlisle – then smudge lipstick on Carlisle’s shirt collar and spray him with perfume. Laugh loudly when Esme notices, and videotape the reaction.

3.Ask if she likes Carlisle’s cute little English accent. When she says she loves everything about Carlisle, call her an “uncultured swine” and storm off.

2. Inquire as to how she jumped off a cliff and survived. When she can’t answer, ask if she is secretly Batman.

And the Number One way to annoy Esme Cullen?

1.Anonymously send her a package of baby clothing in the mail.

10 Ways to Annoy Jacob Black:

10. Never use English around him – instead, bark.

9. Call him a space heater.

8. Tell him that dogs make good pets, not good partners.

7.Ask him if he has RSVPed to the wedding yet.

6. Inform him that real men sparkle.

5. Walk up to him and claim you have imprinted. Say you love him and demand his paw in marriage.

4. Tell him that even though he may run at a boiling 108.9 degrees, Bella doesn’t find him hot.

3. Inquire as to how Leah is… and if he dreams about Sam the way Leah dreams about Bella.

2. Ask him if he likes to do things… doggy style.

And the Number One way to annoy Jacob Black?

1. Make him a day-by-day flip calendar, counting down the amount of time Bella will remain human.

Emmett's the strongest, Edward's the fastest, but Jasper can sit alone in a corner and still make people jealous.

MURPHY'S LE

FAVORITE QUOTES ABOUT OR FROM RENT:

-"I was a boyscout once- and a brownie, till some brat got scared!"

-"You're drunk."

"No I'm not."

-"You gonna put that trashcan back?"

"No!"

-"You can take the girl out of Hicksville, but you can't take the Hicksville out of the girl!"

-"Merry Christmas, bitches!"

-"Happy Kwanzaa, crackers!"

-*cut line from Collins* "Thanks, you honk-headed albino fuck!"

-"Hey Mister, she's my sister!"

-"My cat had a fall, and I went through hell!"

"It's like losing a- how'd you know she fell?"

-In interview about Jonathan Larson:

WJ Heredia: singing "But they purloined my coat- Well you missed a sleeve!"

Jonathan Larson: "That was the wrong key..."

-WJH: "AHH AHH I GOT IT- and scene."

-WJH: "But when he was crying and holding me, I wanted to cry- it took all of my energy not to cry with him- and of course, we all know that corpses don't cry."

-Idina: "We were all so worried that the shi- that the MOVIE!"

-Idina: "I just, I'm ready to be like-" *pretends to drag on a cigarette* "-Last night I had a dream..."

-Anthony: "Are you gonna kick some ass?"

Jesse: "Aw, I'm gonna kick e'rybody's ass! Me and Angeh - that's Angeh over there!"

Anthony: "ANGEH! ANGEH!"

-WJH: "Hello, children!" *blows a kiss*

Jesse: "Now say that like a normal person."

WJH: "Hey kids, what's up? How you doin'?"

Jesse: "What is going on up wit y'all?"

-WJH: "Look at that - LOOK AT THIS!" *flashes cheesy smile*

-WJH: "I am st-yling!"

-Adam: "I was completely fascinated by this group of people. I remember meeting Anthony and recognizing him, like, ”I know this guy. Who the fuck is this guy?” And it was just from Adventures in Babysitting and all these movies."

-Rosario: "I thought Adam was gonna be like 'OH MY GOD!'" *runs*

Adam: *yeah right face*

-Rosario: "I'm trying to be a lady with my little skirt on, not trying to kick people and police and stuff like that, you know, whatever."

Jesse: "As if!"

-Adam: "We had no idea we were going to be on the cover until it actually came out. And as soon as I saw it, the fucking vain fucker that I am was not even excited. I was like, 'That is the worst picture.'"

-Adam "When I go to Santa Fe, and I’m singin’ on the fuckin’ rocks? While we were shooting it, I was like, ”This is a bad idea. This is a baaaad idea.” But I’ll tell ya, it was fun to do."

-Adam: "Get out of my mind! AHHHH!"

-Jesse: "Oh shit! I forgot how fast you are!"

WJH: "AH HA HA!"

(You have to admit, the fact that they couldn't stop laughing after that is the most adorable thing ever!)

-Question: This one’s for Anthony. If I were to take you out to dinner, what would you like for dessert?
Audience: Oooooohhhhh…
Anthony: …that’s kind of personal. No. But I’d like… sorbet. Or a vegan cobbler, which I make very well by the way.
Adam: He likes it with a penis.
Audience: *dies laughing*
Wilson: *dies laughing even more*
Tracie: It’s okay, Anthony. I like it that way too.

-Tracie: "How come when little girls wear tiaras in public they're cute, but when I do it I'm crazy? That just doesn't seem fair..."

-Rosario: "It's nice to be nice, Kim."

Tracie: "...Whatever."

-Tracie: “Hey, Renthead. Why don’t you be in the movie? Would you like that? Would that be fun for you?”

-Tracie: "They're making me beautiful."

-Jesse: "Rosario, say hello to the kids!"

Rosario: "Wazzup!!"

-Anthony: "Okay, that was real, authentic Rosario Dawson love right there for Tracie Thoms."

-Anthony: "There is only one you for all time. Fearlessly be yourself."

-Tracie: “It was easy being a lesbian with her because she’s so damn sexy, I just kept my hands on her booty. Really, she’s ridiculously hot. […] But she really is amazing, it’s insane. And probably illegal. Performing alongside someone so talented and iconic and just fills the screen as she does is one of the most memorable things I’ve experienced in my career. I can’t… how does anyone even put it to words? She’s just… one in a million.”

Tracie: "I'm the horniest motherfucker on the road!"

Rosario: "Did you just hit a boat?!"

-Anthony: (behind the camera) “Give each other a kiss.”

Idina: "I'm going to get red lips all over her."

Rosario: "I don't mind, but then her woman is right there. She is going to get mad at me."

Tracie: *pissed-off face*

-Jesse: "And there we were, sitting at these tables, and we were like, This feels so stupid to sit here and just sing the songs. Anthony was the brave one. Anthony just got up, and stood on a table. And then it exploded."

SSER-KNOWN LAWS:

1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

2. He who laughs last thinks slowest.

3. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

4. Those that live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

5. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

6. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90 probability you'll get it wrong.

7. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog.

8. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

9. The things that come to those who wait will be the things left by those who got there first.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

11. A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.

12. The shinbone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.

13. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

14. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of Jury duty.

15 Things to do at Wal-Mart

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera; & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

When life give you lemons, shut up and eat your damn lemons

I was going to kill the ugliest person alive but then i thought I'd let your mom live one more day

Karin so fat even Naruto don't believe it!

Smile. It makes the world wonder what you're up to.

There are two things that are infinite. The universe and human stupidity. And I'm not so sure about the universe.

Out of my mind. Be back in five minutes.

Normality will be restored as soon as we figure out what it is.

Be yourself. That's crazy enough.

You always get whats coming to you; unless it gets lost in the mail.

Silence is golden but duct tape is silver. I guess I can settle for second place.

They say guns don't kill people. People kill people. Well, I think guns help. I mean, if you just stood there and yelled, "BANG!" i don't think you'd kill many people

Flying is not inherently dangerous- crashing is.

I have animal magnetism-- when I go outside, squirrels stick to my sleeves.

The trouble with real life is that there is no background music

I have not lost my mind; its backed up on a disk somewhere

Beware the letter 'G'. It is the end of everything.

Forecast for tonight: darkness

If you try to fail and succeed, which one did you do?

I am reading a most interesting book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.

How come when you mix water with sugar, you get glue and then when you add eggs and sugar you get cake? Where does the glue go?

If everything seems to be going well, you obviously overlooked something

Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall through a sewer hole and die.

Hell is full of musical amateurs

There is a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line

I'm not random I just have many thoughts

I'm the kind of person who walks into a chair and apologizes

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it

-sticks hand in electric box- CHIDORI!!

If you had a life you would stop talking about mine

We're not retreating! We're advancing in a different direction!

Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever, you keep on talking

The below statement is true

The above statement is false

Heaven doesn't want me there and Hell knows I'll take over.

Don't make me angry, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies

Wanna know how to keep an idiot busy? Take him into a round room and tell him to sit in a corner.

People are like slinkies. Basically useless and yet its so amusing to watch them fall down stairs

In a world of cheerios, be a frootloop!

Earth first. We'll screw up the other planets later.

God must love stupid people...he made so many

There is no great genius without a mixture of madness

When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.

You, you, and you panic. The rest of you follow me.

Lately the only thing keeping me from becoming a serial killer is my dislike for manual labor.

PMS: Every woman's legal right to be a bitch.

Always forgive your enemies, nothing annoys them as much

If you can't dazzle 'em with brilliance, baffle 'em with nonsense

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

When life gives you lemons make grape juice, lay back, and let the world wonder how you did it.

I'm mature and you're not. Nah nah nah nah nah nah!

Eat healthy. Work right. Die anyway.

I have a dream and in it, something eats you.

Its sad your own mom dresses you like that.

Everyone is beautiful on the inside. If you think bones and guts are beautiful.

Its always funny until someone gets hurt. Then its hysterical

My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems

If aliens are looking for intelligent life, why the hell are you scared?!

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.

I met Nicole Richie!! No wait, that might've been a twig...

Looking for a perfect girl? Go buy yourself a barbie doll.

If idiots could fly this place would be an airport.

I know KUNG-FU and 42 other dangerous words

Me and the gummy bears have a plot to rule the world but shhh its a secret!

Quick, whats the number for 9-1-1?

You should always proofread what you write in case you any words.

I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and crap out a better conversation than you.

I ran into my ex today. Then I put it in reverse and hit him again.

By the time you finished reading this you'll realize you just wasted 5 seconds of your life

I burst laughing out in class today...I got that joke you told yesterday

Hi! I'm human. What're you?

Have you considered suing your brain for non-support?

I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass!

Everyone has a right to be ugly, but you're abusing that privilege.

If we were to kill everyone who thought you were stupid, it wouldn't be murder; it would be genocide!

I'd like to leave you with one thought...but I'm not sure you have anywhere to put it!

Wherever there is life there is love

I may not be perfect but at least I'm confident

Sometimes all we need are each other

Life is like a circle. No wonder I'm so dizzy.

Yeah I'm a loser, but I'm the coolest loser you'll ever meet

A friend would call you a retard but a best friend would call you one and act like one with you.

Boy break hearts so why don't we break their necks?

One night, I looked up into the sky. I began counting the reasons why I love you. I was doing great until I ran out of stars.

When they laugh, we'll laugh along too. Because we know better. We know.

I wanted to send you something SEXY... but the mail man told me to get out of the mail box...

I'm NOT SHORT!! ... I'm fun sized!

Pixie sticks! Cause not every kid can afford crack!

Patience is what parents have when there are witnesses!

When you call us BITCHES we just look at each other and crack up, because we knew that WAAAAAAAAAAY BEFORE YOU DID!

Last night I lay in my bed looking up at the stars and thought to myself, WHERE THE FUCK IS MY CEILING!?

Am I pissing you off-fa-fa?

We are the people our parents warned us about!

Have you ever wondered if your mom kissed you goodnight after giving your dad a blow job? YOU ARE NOW!!

Someone told me its illegal to kill someone for pissing you off...crap...!

I have the kind of friends where if my house was burning down, they'd be roasting marshmallows and flirting with the firemen! (Yeah and they probably start it too..)

RAWR!! That means I love you in dinosaur!

Grant me the serenity to accept things I can not change... And the shovel to hide the bodies of those who piss me off...

Its not that I'm not a “people person”... its just that I'm not a “stupid people person”.

Lets play Simon Says! Simon Says... GO FUCK YOURSELF!!

You and me are friends. You fight, I fight. You hurt, I hurt. You cry, I cry. You jump off a bridge... I'm gonna miss your dumb ass!

I will not be a naughty girl. I will not be a naughty girl. I will not be a naughty girl. I will not be a... aww who am I kidding!

When a boy tells you to “Suck It!” Just smile and say “Sorry but my mother told me to never put SMALL things in my mouth!”

If I promise not to kill you... can I have a hug?

Some people are like slinkies... they're really good for nothing! But they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs! (

I don't have a short attention span, I just... Oh look a kitty!

I love this RETARD I call my BEST FRIEND!!

I didn't hit you... I simply high-fived your face!

Exactly how much fun can I have before I go to hell?

HELL- Where all the fun people end up!

Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning the devil says “Oh crap she's up!”

Note to self: It is illegal to stab people for being stupid!

They keep saying the right person will come along... I think a truck hit mine!

It better to have loved and lost then to live with the PSYCHO the rest of your life!

Only You!... can help me hide the bodies!

I'm smiling cause I'm your sister, I'm laughing cause theres nothing you can do about it!

When I die, I'm going to haunt the fuck out of you people! (Someone unknowingly quoted Dwight Houston OMG)

Hello, and welcome to the Mental Health Hotline

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3,4,5, and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to your mother ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which button to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer.

If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696969696969696969696.

If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key unil a representative comes on the line.

If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, and date of birth, social security number and your mother's maiden name.

If you have post traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000.

If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short term memory loss, press 9.

If you have short term memory loss, press 9.

If you have short term memory loss, press 9.

If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you.

If the opposite of 'pro' is 'con', then what's the opposite of 'progress'?

We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police

I'm not littering...I'm donating to the Earth.

Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.

Sarcasm is one more service I offer. Compassion costs extra.

Don't tell me the sky's the limit, when there's footprints on the moon

Don't look at me with that tone of voice!

You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.

Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren’t, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimieKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, That Bloody Demon, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienal, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minomoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy The Mary-Sue Slayer, Random Little Writer, SamanthaFantasyFan, The-Good-Die-Alone, Daughter of a Renegade, Littlewhisker, Patronus Charm, Duskgrowlthevampire, Wanna Bet On a Bear Hug, HarryPotterismyentirelife,XxxImNotOkayxxX

A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 percent of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 percent of the people that read this won't repost it?

Advice That Guys Should Try And Take...

When she acts shy- Say you love her

When she runs away from you- Chase her

When she puts your face near hers- Kiss her

When she kicks and punches- Hold her tight

When she is silent- She is thinking of how to say 'I love you'

When she ignores you- She wants all your attention

When she pulls away- Grab her by the waist and never let go

When you see her at her worst- Tell her she look beautiful

When she says nothing's wrong- A million things are going through her head

When she screams at you- Tell her you love her AND mean it

When you see her walking- Sneak up behind her, grab her by the waist and give her a kiss

When she is scared- Hold her and tell her everything is going to be all right cause you are there

When she looks like something is the matter- Kiss her and tell her not to worry

When she hold your hands-

Play with her fingers

When she stares at your mouth

Kiss her

When she pushes you or hits you like a dumb ass cuz she thinks she’s stronger than you

Grab her and don’t let go

When she starts cursing at you trying to act all tuff

Kiss her and tell her you love her

When she's quiet

Ask her what’s wrong

When she ignores you

Give her your attention

When she pulls away

Pull her back

When you see her at her worst

Tell her she's beautiful

When you see her start crying

Just hold her and don’t say a word

When you see her walking

Sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she's scared

Protect her

When she steals your favourite hat

Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night

When she teases you

Tease her back and make her laugh

When she doesn't answer for a long time

Reassure her that everything is okay

When she looks at you with doubt

Back yourself up

When she says that she likes you

SHE REALLY DOES MORE THAN YOU COULD UNDERSTAND!

When she grabs at your hands

Hold hers and play with her fingers

When she bumps into you;

bump into her back and make her laugh

When she tells you a secret

Keep it safe and untold

When she looks at you in your eyes

Don’t look away until she does

When she says it's over

She still wants you to be hers

When she reposts this bulletin

She wants you to read it

- Stay on the phone with her even if she's not saying anything.

- When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go

- When she says she's ok don’t believeit, talk with her

- Because 10 yrs later she'll remember you

- Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her

- Treat her like she's all that matters to you.

- Stay up all night with her when she's sick.

- Watch her favourite movie with her or her favourite show even if you think it's stupid.

- Give her the world.

- Let her wear your clothes.

- When she's bored and sad, hang out with her.

- Let her know she's important.

- Kiss her in the pouring rain.

CRAZY QUOTES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?" -Albert Einstein

"What is the most innocent place in any country? Is it not the insane asylum? These people drift through life truly innocent, unable to see into themselves at all." -Arthur Miller

"Insane people are always sure that they are fine. It is only the sane people who are willing to admit that they are crazy." -Nora Ephron

"Sometimes it's to your advantage for people to think you're crazy" -Thelonious Monk

"If you want to increase your insanity, avoid the asylum" -Amy Cameron Farmer

If these apply to you or anyone you know, Copy and paste to your profile.

1 scary way to break up This is so wrong...so it just kinda freaked me out. I don't really believe this but this is sooo scary!! DO NOT stop reading this or something bad will happen!! One day, Sarah was walking home from school when her boyfriend drove by and honked at her to get in. She got in his car and he drove her to the lake. Her boyfriend said he was going to tell her something very important. Sarah could have sworn he was going to propose. However, he flicked her off, pushed her in the lake and yelled, "I am breaking up with you, you awful !! I hate you and I think that maybe you should just end your life! DUMB !!" He laughed and drove off. It was a very cold day. Sarah climbed out of the lake, freezing cold, and feeling the worst she had in her entire life. She got home went in a hot bath, and slit her wrists and died in the bathtub. Her parents yelled and screamed at her to get out until they finally broke the door down. They saw no body, but the entire bathroom was dripping with her blood. Her mom went insane and killed herself three days later, her dad is in prison, accused of murder. Later that week, Sarah's ex-boyfriend was taking a shower when she came from the drain, rotting and bloody, with a razor in her hand and said "Goodbye Jason." She cut his throat before he could scream. If you do not repost this with the title "1 scary way to break up", you are a heartless ...and Sarah come to you in the shower from the drain, and will kill you the same way she killed her boyfriend. 24 ppl have broken this chain and died you have 13 minutes! Repost this or you will die!

You're Too Big a Harry Potter Fan when...

You mutter nonsense Latin words under your breath.

You call your least favorite teacher Snape.

Your computer says "You've Got Mail" and you run outside looking for an owl.

You actually ask for a broom for Christmas.

You mutter "lumos" under your breath every time you turn on a flashlight.

You sort everyone you meet into the four Hogwarts houses. (Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff and Slytherin.)

You were burned when you couldn't get through the flames of your fireplace.

You had to go to the hospital after you broke your nose running headfirst into the wall between platforms nine and ten.

You point a normal things like parking meters and say "Look at the things these muggles dream up!"

You try on every piece of silvery fabric your mom has to see if you turn invisible

Before getting up to get something, you always try to summon it first. Accio TV remote!

You were reduced to tears when you finally had book 5, 6, and 7 in your hands.

You refer to your Chemistry class as Potions

You spend hours tapping bricks in special orders hoping that a secret entrance to Diagon Alley will appear.

When playing chess, you yell orders to the chess players and get upset when they don't move.

You yell into the "tellyfone."

You get extraordinarily emotional every time you hear "Hedwig's Theme".

Despite being an American, you use the word "wicked" all the time because Rupert Grint does.

You get thoroughly overexcited every time you see a word somewhere that is distantly linked with HP (ie. Saint Hedwig's).

You name all of your pets after HP characters.

You know that Harry's birthday is July 31, 1980, Hermione's birthday is September 19, 1980 and Ron's birthday is March 3rd, 1980 even though it never said in the books.

You refer to Voldemort as "You-Know-Who", and your friends don't have any idea who you're talking about.

You were kicked out of the movie theater for standing on your chair, throwing your shoe at the screen and yelling "THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN IN THE BOOK!" over and over again, even for the most trivial differences.

You count the days until you're old enough for your apparating license, and everyone else thinks you're talking about driving.

You know you're too obsessed with Harry Potter when:

1) You accidentally called your friend Ginny because she has red hair.

2) Instead of studying for an extra important exam, your reading HP.

3) Your Sims game has a whole neighborhood devoted to the wizarding world.

4) Your friends give you The Look when you say Harry.

5) Your sister thinks your really a witch in disguise.

5) You dress up as a HP character and practice wandless magic.

6) Your cell rings and you absentmindedly wave your pencil and say "Accio cell phone"

7) You fall out of your chair in class because your daydreaming about Harry Potter.

8) Your parents have banned Harry Potter books from your possession.

9) You scream whenever you see anything Harry Potter.

10) You screamed when you and a friend were at the mall and you saw a Harry Potter book countdown poster.

11) Your friend knows exactly what to get you for your birthday, every year- a HP poster.

12) You are rebelling against JK Rowling's pairings...in Social Studies.

13) You think your math teacher is a Death Eater.

14) When people ask the person your with what's wrong with you, they look at them pointedly and say "Don't ask"

15) You're actually reading this.

16) You have spent more than healthy time on Harry Potter sights.

17) You're convinced that your Hogwarts letter is late...and that Harry is distantly related to your uncle.

18) One of your stuffed animals is named Crookshanks.

19) You have worse symptoms than this list.

20)You are laughing right now, saying yes to every statement!

The Rules of Hogwarts

1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball

2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office

3) I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter

4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show you the pointy hat trick

5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar

6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination

7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after my lucky charms"

8) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this years Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's taste-less, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.

9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus's "time of the month"

10) I am not allowed to make light sabre sounds with my wand

11) I am not allowed to give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they're real animals

12) I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force"

13) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work"

14) I will not you my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot

15) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it

16) I will not lock the Slytherin's and Gryffindor's in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive

17) I will not charm the suits of armour to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast

18) I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day"

19) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways

20) It is not necessary to yell, "BURN!" Whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor

21) I will not use the phrase, "Get a Life" when talking to Voldemort

22) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy

23) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling

24) I will stop referring to showering as "Giving Moaning-Myrtle an eye-full"

25) I will not make, "OMGWTF" a spell

26) It is not necessary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate

27) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways, not even on Halloween

28) I will not poke Hufflepuff's with spoons, nor shall I insist that their colours indicate that they're "covered in bee's"

29) "I've heard every joke possible about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge

30) I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "Told you I was Hard Core"

31) If a class-mate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm, not even if they are in Slytherin

32) House Elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers

33) I will not start every potion's class by asking Snape if the potion is acceptable as Body Lotion

34) I will not call the Weasely twins, "bookends"

35) I will not give Luna Lovegood Coast-To-Coast AM transcripts

36) I do not have an Edward Cullen Patronous

37) I will not lick Trevor

38) Gryffindor Courage does not come in bottles labelled, "Firewhiskey"

39) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween

40) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself to seriously

41) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knight's Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions

42) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet

43) "To conquer the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice

44) I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God

45) "Beaters Do It With Wood" is not funny,even if the only people not laughing are the Weasley Twins and Oliver

Girls Don't Realize These Things

I'm sorry that I bought you roses to tell you that I like you

I'm sorry That I was raised with respect not to sleep with you when you were drunk

I'm sorry That my body's not ripped enough to "satisfy" your wants

I'm sorry that I open your car door, and pull out your chair like I was raised

I'm sorry That I'm not cute enough to be "your guy"

I'm sorry That I am actually nice; not a jerk

I'm sorry I don't have a huge bank account to buy you expensive things

I'm sorry I like to spend quality nights at home cuddling with you, instead of at a club

I'm sorry I would rather make love to you then just screw you like some random guy.

I'm sorry That I am always the one you need to talk to, but never good enough to date

I'm sorry That I always held your hair back when you threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car, but when we went out you went home with another guy

I'm sorry That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere, but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend

I'm sorry If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around

I'm sorry If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work

I'm sorry that you can't realize.. I've been the one all along.

I'm sorry If you read this and know somebody like this but don't care

But most of all

I'm sorry For not being sorry anymore

I'm sorry That you can't accept me for who I am

I'm sorry I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good enough to make it in your world.

I'm sorry I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for...

I'm sorry That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.

I'm sorry That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.

I'm Sorry That I cared

I'm sorry that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.

Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?" Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.

If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'

If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things'

I'm not a perfect girl. My hair doesn't always stay in place & I spill things a lot.I'm pretty clumsy& sometimes I have a broken heart. my friends & I sometimes fight & maybe some days nothing goes right. but when I thing about it & take a step back I remember how amazing life truly is & that maybe.just maybe.I like being

υиpєяƒєт...

I'm INTO THEATRE & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.

I’m a VIRGIN, so I MUST be a prude.

I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly or crazy.

I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a Goth.

I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naïve.

I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.

I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.

I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.

I’m WICCAN, so I MUST be a devil-worshipping baby killer.

I’m A GOOD LIAR, so I MUST be an actor/actress.

I’m a BLACK BELT, so I MUST always want to kick someone’s ass.

I LIKE TO BE MYSELF, so I MUST be cocky and arrogant.

I LOVE ANIMALS, so I MUST be a vegetarian.

I’m a TREEHUGGER, so I MUST be a drug addicted hippie.

I’m INTO JIMI HENDRIX, so I MUST be on drugs.

I’m a MUSICIAN, so I MUST not be doing anything with my life.

I'm ASIAN, so I MUST love math.

I'm PUNK, so I MUST cut my wrists.

I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.

I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.

I'm IRISH, so I MUST be a alcoholic.

I'm BLOND, so I MUST be a stupid ditz.

I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore

I have A LOT OF GUY FRIENDS so I MUST be dating them all.

I have GOOD GRADES, so I MUST be a nerd

I'm a CHRISTIAN, so I MUST not be able to go out.

I have BLOND HAIR, so I MUST be easy.

I WEAR A SKIRT SOMETIMES, so I MUST be a girly-girl.

I am DIFFERENT, so I MUST be a freak.

I wear BRIGHT COLORS, so I MUST be a prep.

I LOVE TO READ, so I MUST be a geek.

I don’t TALK IN CLASS so I MUST have no friends.

Stereotypes suck! Copy, paste & add.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "where to begin?"

If you've ever wished you could go into a book/the TV and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've started having dreams featuring fictional characters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever done anything incredibly stupid for no apparent reason, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile.

To Every Girl:

To every girl that is SCARED to put her heart out there again, because she has been HURT too many times or so badly.

To every girl that has been cheated on, because she's not a slut who gives it up to any guy.

To every girl that dresses cute, not skanky.

To every girl who wants to be called beautiful, not hot.

To every girl that will spend her whole day looking for the perfect present for you.

To every girl who gets her heart broken, because he chose that bitch instead.

To every girl that would die to have a decent boyfriend.

To every girl who would just once like to be treated like a princess.

To every girl that cries at night because of another heartbreak.

To every girl that won't get down on her knees open her mouth just to get a boyfriend.

To every girl that just wants to hold hands.

To every girl that kisses him with meaning.

To every girl who just wishes he cared more.

To every girl who would just once want a guy to give their jacket up when they are cold.

To every girl who just wants him to call.

To every girl who lies awake at night thinking about him.

To every girl that just wants to cuddle.

To every girl that just wants to sleep with him without having sex.

To every girl who shows how much she cares and gets nothing back.

To every girl that thought "maybe this one could be the one."

To every girl that laughs at stupid stuff when she actually doesn't think it is funny.

To every girl who is just looking for that one and only. and is having a rough time along the way.

To every girl that doesn't want a guy who just plays with her emotions but actually cares about how she feels.

To every girl who wants words backed up with actions.

To every girl who doesn't just want to be another pretty face.

To every girl that fell for all the lies only to find themselves alone in the end.

To every girl that gave her heart away to have it shoved back in her face. never again

To every girl that has faith that "tomorrow will be a better day." And it will be.

If you are a nice girl put this on you profile under the title : "To every girl."

If you are a guy that thinks every girl should try to think about even a few of these things repost it as "I am looking for this girl" or if u have this girl put this on you profile under the title " I have this girl"

And if you can, add another line!

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.

When life gives you lemons, throw them back and ask for a Weasley or two.

Oh, they're over the rainbow. Ya know, way up high? (After someone asks you where something is)

Get over it.

Be insane... because well-behaved girls never made history.

Caution: water on road during rain.

Dementors: Turning people emo since 370 B.C

Yes, I know I am random, but you have to understand - salad.

No, the forks will fall with the spoons... it is the SPORK'S era now!

Always look for the bare necessities, and then sing the song.

It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives.

Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery.

Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.

Duct tape is silver, but silence is golden. Are you catching my drift?

A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking.

I laugh in the face of danger. Then I hide until it goes away.

A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.

I can resist everything except temptation.

You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter.

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea.

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic.

IMPORTANT!!

We all know or knew someone like this!!

One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school.His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying all of his books.I thought to myself, 'Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd.' I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on. As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed him his glasses, I said, 'Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives.' He looked at me and said, 'Hey thanks!' There was a big smile on his face.It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before. We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends. He said yes.We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him. Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again. I stopped him and said, 'Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!' He just laughed and handed me half the books. Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.. When we were seniors we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke. I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor and I was going for business on a football scholarship. Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation.I was so glad it wasn't me having to get up there and speak. Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked great.He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous! Today was one of those days.I could see that he was nervous about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, 'Hey, big guy, you'll be great!' He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled. 'Thanks,' he said. As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began, 'Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach... but mostly your friends... I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story.' I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home. He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. 'Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.' I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment. I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth. Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or for worse. God puts us all in each others lives to impact one another in some way. Look for God in others. You now have two choices, you can :1) Put this on your profile or 2) Forget you read this and act like it didn't touch your heart. As you can see, I took choice number 1. 'Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.' There is no beginning or end.. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift.

Month one

Mommy I am only 8 inches long but I have all my organs. I love the sound of your voice. Every time I hear it I wave my arms and legs. The sound of your heart beat is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy today I learned how to suck my thumb. If you could see me you could definitely tell that I am a baby. I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though. It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy I'm a boy!! I hope that makes you happy. I always want you to be happy. I don't like it when you cry. You sound so sad. It makes me sad too and I cry with you even though you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy my hair is starting to grow. It is very short and fine but I will have a lot of it. I spend a lot of my time exercising. I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes and stretch my arms and legs. I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today. Mommy, he lied to you. He said that I'm not a baby. I am a baby Mommy, your baby. I think and feel. Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again. I don't like him. He seems cold and heartless. Something is intruding my home. The doctor called it a needle. Mommy what is it? It burns! Please make him stop! I can't get away from it! Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy I am okay. I am in Jesus's arms. He is holding me. He told me about abortion. Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped. Two more eyes that will never see. Two more hands that will never touch. Two more legs that will never run. One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this

there were 2 girls named Sarah and Jane

They were looking through peoples Myspaces. Sarah slowly came upon this one Myspace. It had creatures in the background and the man looked like a psycho. She started laughing with Jane commenting on how ugly he was. Right then, an instant message came up. It said:

SatanStalker: So how do u like my MySpace??

XxLoVemExX: What??

XxLoVemExX: Who is this anyway??

SatanStalker: Well, you should know; you're looking at my MySpace right now.

XxLoVemExX: How do you know that i'm looking at ur pro??

SatanStalker:I know when people look at my MySpace.

XxLoVemExX: What? That doesn't make any sense, how?

SatanStalker: I just do.

Satanstalker: Especially to pretty girls like you.

Satanstalker: With very nice legs I might say.

At the time Sarah was wearing high shorts. She started to pull them down a little bit to cover what ever she could. She and Jane started to get worried now.

XxLoVemExX: Ok whatever man you're starting to scare the living sh!t out of me.

SatanStalker: You should be afraid.

SatanStalker: You wouldn't want an ugly guy like me touching your legs huh? I mean that's what you just said about me with your friend like a minute ago.

They were in shock.

Jane said "Holy crap man just block him hes a f*ing psycho!"

Sarah replied "Ok holy crap, you think hes watching us?"

SatanStalker: I am.

SatanStalker: Well it wouldn't really matter if you blocked me anyway; it wouldn't stop me from coming to your house.

XxLoVemExX: What? My house?

SatanStalker: Yeah, you're alone so its not a problem.

XxLoVemExX: Ok I think I'm going to leave now because you're freaking me out.

SatanStalker: Your screen name says love me, trust me that wont be a problem.

SatanStalker has just signed off.

Sarah and Jane were really scared.

Jane said "Whatever lets just go upstairs trust me I doubt hes really coming. Its just a joke from someone."

They went upstairs and were having a pillow fight.

All of a sudden Jane had to go to the bathroom.She told Sarah, and left the room.

Ten minutes later Sarah noticed that her friend was still in the bathroom and was wondering what was up. She went and knocked but no one said anything. She opened it and found Jane there on the ground dead. She started to scream but when she turned around SatanStalker was there. News the next morning said that a girl named Jane Dunbach was found dead in the bathroom; her neck sliced with blood all over the ground. with her head nailed to the wall. Just her head. And Sarah Runger was missing

If you do not repost this in the next two minutes here will be three men, one in your bathroom, one in your room, and one killing your parents at that very moment.

Tonight at 1:30am. Well what are you waiting for?

Repost or you are going to die.

When it rains on my parade, I bust out my slip n’ slide.

'Liar, liar, pants on fire' is such a crude insult. It's rough, and trashy. But, 'Teller of untruths, your trousers have combusted', is so much more sophisticated, don't you think?

When life gives you lemons, alter their DNA and make SUPER LEMONS!

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. Then you’re a mile away from them and you have their shoes.

In a world full of cheerios, be a fruit loop.

I used to be normal, until I met the freaks that I call my friends

I ran with scissors, and lived!

Taste the rainbow- Eat CRAYONS!!!

When there's a will, I want to be in it.

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

Everyone makes mistakes. The trick is to make mistakes when nobody is looking.

I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me.

Boys are like Slinky's... useless, but fun to watch fall downstairs

Life isn't passing me by, its trying to run me over.

I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road without their motives being questioned.

Never knock on Death’s door. Ring the doorbell and run. He HATES that.

I hear voices in my head. But that’s alright. Most of them are pretty nice.

The world is full of crazy people. They made me their leader.

I run with scissors….it makes me feel dangerous.

Come to the Dark Side. We have cookies.

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Am I the only one who finds it scary that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is abbreviation such a long word?

I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every second of it.

Procrastinators will rule the world... Tomorrow!

You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.

Your weirdness is creeping out my imaginary friend.

I didn’t say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame you.

Some see the glass half empty, some see it half full. Me? I just want to know who’s been drinking my soda!!!

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws.

God made man, and then he said, "I can do better than that," and made women.

Of course I’m out of mind! It’s dark and scary in there!

Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it?

There’s a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

I’m an angel, honest! The horns are just there to keep the halo straight.

God made man, and then he said, "I can do better than that," and made women.

Boys are like Slinky's, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

If at first you don’t succeed- skydiving isn’t for you.

Whoever said nothing is impossible has never tried slamming a revolving door.

Normal people scare me….but not as much as I scare them.

Sanity? I never had such a useless thing to begin with!

There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, it is usually an oncoming train.

Silence is golden but duct tape is silver.

What is this “normal” you speak of? Stay away I don’t want to catch your “normal”!

Pssh. Normal is just a setting on the washing machine.

I used to have super powers but my therapist took them away.

Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you’re up to.

Always take the time to smell the roses but remember sooner or later you’re gonna inhale a bee.

I never repeat myself, so pay close attention the first time, because I never repeat myself.

I’d explain it to you but your brain would explode.

When all else fails bring out the duct tape.

I find 'good morning' a contradiction of terms.

If you can't convince them, confuse them.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

What happens if you get scared half to death... twice?

Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one

I don't need your attitude. I got one of my own.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.

Very few personal problems can't be solved through suitable application of high explosives.

There are three types of people: those who can count, and those who can't.

Worst excuse for not turning in homework: I couldn't find anyone to copy it from.

I see regular people! Run for your lives!

If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?

Experience is the thing you have left when everything else is gone.

I hear voices, and they don't like you.

Normal people scare me. A lot.

I would be more scared if you were aiming for the person next to me.

What you call stupidity, I call selective understanding.

I think they named oranges before they named carrots. "Hey, what are these?" "They're Orange." "What about these?" "Ah Shoot!"

I'm not so good with the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.

I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

Embrace the inner rebel - don't sit up straight.

One day, your prince will come. Mine? Oh, I killed him with an AK-47. Common sense speaking here. Wait. What? You're not supposed to do that? You're lying.

I write for the same reason I breathe; if I didn't I would die.

You can slam a revolving door... into someone you don't like.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Why can pizza get to your house faster then an ambulance?

Why are they called apartments when they all stick together?

Don’t tell me the sky’s the limit when there are footprints on the moon!

The world is out to get me. Hide me in your closet and don’t let it find me.

There’s nothing better than a good friend except a good friend with chocolate!

I never make stupid mistakes. Only very, very clever ones.

If annoyed further, I shall spork your eyes out.

Growing old is mandatory. Growing up is optional.

Slinky Escalator = Endless Fun

I’m bored…run for your sanity.

You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor.

Life is life a corndog. I just haven’t figured out why yet.

When life hands you lemons, make apple juice and let the world wonder how.

When life gives you lemons, squirt it in life’s eye and see how much life likes lemons then.

Don’t walk in my footsteps. I tend to walk into walls or off the occasional cliff.

Who ever said that words don't hurt never got hit by a dictionary.

Never turn your back on someone, they just might stab it.

The walls we build around us

Are they to protect us from the demons outside?

Or are they to keep sealed the demons already within ourselves?

To isolate our hearts and thus turn them to solid ice

How we scream in pain when the light warms our hearts

Do we fear to feel the pain of loving again?

Or do we fear hurting the ones who love us?

We turn our eyes away from the windows to our souls

Do we fear to look inside ourselves and be forced to see our demons?

To face what we have been hiding from...

The people from your past will always be a part of who you are now. Trying to forget them is useless. There is no reason or sense in letting their memories go.

Be careful of your enemy once and of your friend a thousand times, for a double crossing friend knows more evil.

A kiss blown is a kiss wasted... the only real kind is a kiss tasted.

Distance never separates two hearts that really care, for our memories span the miles and in seconds we are there. But whenever I start feeling sad, because I miss you, I remind myself how lucky I am to have someone so special to miss.

Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.

One story has to its end- but only so the next one can begin. The future is still full of uneasy and unanswered questions so let’s continue our journey to our answers!

Destroy is such a strong word! I prefer ‘redecorated for free’.

Everyday I think people can't get any stupider, and everyday I'm proven horribly wrong.

If Tylenol, Duct Tape, and a Band Aid can't fix it, then you have a serious problem.

A good friend will bail you out of jail. Your best friend will be sitting next to you in the cell saying 'That was freakin’ awesome!'

If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?

No one is a virgin, the world screws us all.

Scientists say 1 out of every 4 people is crazy, check 3 friends; if they are okay, you're it.

When life gives you lemons make grape juice. Then sit back and let the world wonder how the hell you did it.

I'm an angel! Honest! The horns are just there to keep the halo up straight!

Smile because it’s the second best thing you can do with your lips.

I reject your reality and substitute my own.

I want a guy who would move the hair away from my eyes and then kiss me. Hold my hand in the line at the mall and make all the other girls jealous. Someone who would sing to me at random moments. Who would let me sleep on their chest. A boy who would get mad at someone if they called me ugly or was mean to me. I want someone who would call me three times a day if they went away. Someone who would let me gossip to him and he would just smile and agree with everything I had to say. He would throw stuffed animals at me when I acted dumb and then kiss me a million times. Someone who would make fun of me just to make me laugh. He would take me to the park and put his arms around my waist and give me big bear hugs all the time. He would tell all his friends about me and smile when he did it. And we’d make out in the pouring rain. He would never be afraid to say, “I love you,” in front of all of his friends, and we’d argue about silly things and then make up. I want a boy who would kiss me at midnight on New Year’s Eve and count stars with me. Who would stay home with me on a Friday night just to help me make dinner or watch movies under the same blanket. Someone who would tell me I’m beautiful, but not too often. Who would make me laugh like no one else could. I want a guy who would give his hoodie to me and snuggle up next to me when it’s cold. A boy who would come up behind me and wrap his arms around my waist and whisper “You look beautiful today.“ But mostly, I want someone who would be my best friend and would never break my heart.

If you still believe in fairy tales & want one of your own, copy and paste this to your profile.

On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. (But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box) Do not turn upside down. (Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating. (Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (But wouldn't that save more time? Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate machinery. (We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness. (One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: keep out of children. (hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation...)

On a string of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor: Not to be used for the other use. (Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts. (but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. (somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)

On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands. (Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

On Rock, Paper, Scissors I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to "magically wrap around" Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody! A rock would tear that stuff up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, "Oh shoot, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you!"

A Minnesota couple decided to vacation to Florida during the winter. They planned to stay at the very same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So, the husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida on Thursday. His wife would fly down the following day. The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her e-mail address, and without realizing his error, he sent the e-mail. Meanwhile...somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral. He was a minister of many years who was called home to glory following a sudden heart attack. The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she fainted. The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read: To: My Loving Wife Subject: I've Arrived Date: 16 May 2003 I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send e-mails to your loved ones. I've just arrived and have been checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is not as uneventful as mine was. P.S. Sure is hot down here!

9 Things I Hate About Everyone

1. People who point at their wrist asking for the time... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their duff to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk 5 feet to the TV and change the channel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn Right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

5. When people say while watching a film, "did ya see that?" No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor!

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?"... Didn't give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8. When people say "life is short". What the hell?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do thats longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?" If the bus came, would I be standing here??

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica(real name)(i always change my penname)(tehehehe) I'veComeToTakeYourCheese, Vampire Scooby, blissfulmemories, Misfit Band Geek, Inuyashagrl101, Yamahato Yokimoko-san, Wind797, Darkmanu,Mira94, spy master123, livingintheclouds, HarryPotterismyenirelife,XxxImNotOkayxxX

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Tsuyu Mikazuki, WeaselChick, Revenant666, darkflame1516, AirGirl Phantom, Agent of the Divine One, pointless people of Pluto, itachikakashi, xXxLuna-of-the-ChosenxXx, grim's-little-girl, Kuro Fenikkusu, Flyboy254, Flame Swordsman, HarryPotterismyentirelife,XxxImNotOkayxXX

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, Sparrowflight, Frostpaw, Crazy Rayne, Ceata, Mira94, livingintheclouds, HarryPotterismyenirelife,XxxImNotOkayxxX

I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Harry Potter, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone.: Iheartjake1220, FaerieRose13, Dancer4Life15,Marigold Winters, SparklingTopazEyes, 7HockeyStarVampireObsessed7, xshoppingshortiex, AlexRussofan, Twilighting.Ensures, Rosalie Sawyer, Angel JJK, HarryPotterismyentirelife,XxxImNotOkayxxX

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you have ever had done something or said something that made perfect sense to your real friends and only caused your "peers" to look at you strangely and roll their eyes, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you sometimes talk to yourself copy and paste this onto your profile.

Paste this in your profile if you're a procrastination addict.

If you don't watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If Fanfiction to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random, or anything similar, post this in your profile.

If you or your best friend is insane, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever busted a move or burst into song for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think rap is the most awful thing to ever be called "music," and that rappers are wanna-be's who are being paid to make fools out of themselves and can't even sing, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie (or show) so many times that you can quote it word for word. And you do at random moments; copy and paste this in you're profile

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are strangely obsessed with these copy-paste things, copy and past this into your profile.

If you have ever started laughing uncontrollably, copy and paste this into your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you have a fanfiction account, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever spelled your name wrong, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ran up a "Down" escalator, copy this into your profile.

If you ran down an "Up" escalator, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen up stairs, copy this onto your profile.

If you have ever fallen off a stair rail and hit your head on the stairs, copy this onto your profile..

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similiar, copy this into your profile.

98 of teenagers do drugs, have sex, and drink alcohol...put this in your profile if you like chocolate chip cookies.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile. Oh the ironie...

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile.

If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are addicted to wizards and would like to become one, post this onto your profile.

The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.

1.You have 10 dollars and need to buy snacks at a gas station. What do you buy?

Nutella, Reese's, and Oreos.

2. If you were reincarnated a creature, what would you want to be?

Um...A Beavcoon! :D

3. Who's your favorite redhead?

WEASLEY TWINS!!!

4. What do you order when you're at IHOP?

Pancakes. Duh.

5. Last book you read?

The last book I finnished was this Harry Potter prodry called Barry Trotter,and the book I'm reading now is The Golden Fleece.

6. Describe your mood.

Hungry(I'm gonna go eat after I finnish this!)

7. Describe the last time you were injured?

Friday. I smacked my hand on a chair really hard and now there's a bruise :(

8. Of all your friends, who would you want to be stuck in a well with?

Ashley,because then we'd actully have a chance of getting out.

9. Rock concert or symphony?

Rock.

10. What is the wallpaper of your cell phone?

I got my phone turned off,so I don't really remember,but I think it was Murnro Chambers :/

11. Favorite Soda?

Orange!

12. What type of shirt are you wearing?

Black with "Save Ferris" and Cameron from Ferris Buler's Day Off

13. If you could only use one form of transportation, what would it be?

The TARDIS

14. Most recent movie you have watched in theatres?

Um...I don't remember,but the last movie I watched was Step Up Revolution.

15. Name an actor/actress/singer you have had the hots for:

One Direction!!!

16. What’s your favorite kind of cake?

RED VELVET!!! :D

17. What did you have for dinner last night?

Food.

18. Look to your left, what do you see?

My dog in her cage.

19. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?

Nope.

20. Favorite toy as a child?

My dolls.

21. Do you buy your own groceries?

Hell no! I'm thirteen!

22. Do you think people talk about you behind your back?

Oh, I don't think... I KNOW.

23. Whens the last time you had gummy worms?

Over a year.

24. Whats your favorite fruit?

Mangos.

25. Do you have a picture of yourself doing a cartwheel?

No,I can't do cartweels :(

26. Do you like running long distances?

No,I'm fast,but I can't run for more than 5 minutes.

27. Have you ever eaten snow?

Who hasn't?

28. What color are your bedsheets?

Blue and brown and green.

29. What’s your favorite flower?

Roses.

30. Do you do ballet?

No, I do hip hop.

31. Do you listen to classical music?

No.

32. What is the 1st TV Theme song that pops in your head?

Happy Days(It's this really old show)

33. Do you watch Spongebob?

Sometimes.

34. What temperature is it outside right now?

Cold.

35. Do people consider you smart?

Uh... Does my mom count?

36. How many piercings do you have?

1 on each ear.

37. Are you signed on AIM?

What is that?

38. Have you ever tried gluing your fingers together?

HELL YEAH.

39. How do you feel about your family?

Their very...intrestring.

40. Do you have an iPod?

No.

41. What time do you go to bed?

10 pm

42. What CD is currently in your CD player?

Vices and Virtures by Panic! At the Disco.

43. What movie do you know every line to?

Ferris Buler's Day Off.

44. What is your favorite salad dressing?

Ranch.

45. What do you want for Christmas this year?

A iPod.

46. What family member/friend lives the farthest from you? Where?

My friends on the internet.

47. Do you like hugs?

Yes.

48. Last time you almost had a heart attack?

Tumblr. 'Nuff said.

49. What's the way people most often mispronounce any part of your name?

They don't misspronounce it,they just misspell it.

50. Last person you hugged?

My couisn.

Your favorite Hunger Games character and why:

Fiinnniiiiccccckkkkkk!

Random asdfmovie quotes:

"I baked you a pie!"

"Oh boy, what flavor?"

"PIE flavor."

o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o

"Die, potato!"

pulls out gun* "Not today."

o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o

"No! I'm allergic to adorableness!"

o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o

"Joey, did you eat my sandwich?"

"I am your sandwich."

o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o

"I like trains."

o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o

"I am a stegosaurus!"

o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o

"THROW THE CHEESE!!!"

o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o

"It's so beautiful out here."

"Yeah. Just me, you, and the moon."

"AYYYE!!! You guys should kiss!!"

o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o

"Hello, parking meter!"

"Hello!"

o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o

22 Things to do in an Elevator 1. CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?" 2. STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off. 3. WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves. 4. GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral. 5. MEOW occasionally. 6. STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly 7. SAY -DING at each floor. 8. SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons. 9.MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button. 10. STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on." 11. WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?" 12. TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone. 13. DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space." 14. WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you. 15. PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more. 16. ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones. 17. HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?" 18. DROP a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!" 19. BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift. 20. PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers. 21. SWAT at flies that don't exist. 22. CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it. Spread the Stupidity

One for Girls! (A) A couple is lying in bed. The man says, "I'm going to make you the happiest woman alive!" The woman replies "I'll miss you..." (B) Dear Lord, I pray for wisdom to understand my man, Love to forgive him, And Patience for his moods. Because, Lord if I pray for Strength, I'll beat him to death. AMEN (C) Q:What do you call an intelligent, good-looking, sensitive man? A: Gay.

Mummy...Johnny brought a gun to school He told his friends that it was cool And when he pulled the trigger back It shot with a great crack Mummy I was a good girl I did what I was told I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold But mummy when I went to school that day, I never said goodbye I'm sorry mummy I had to go, but mommy please don't cry When Johnny shot the gun he hit me and another And all because he got the gun from his older brother Mummy please tell daddy that I love him very much And please tell Chris, my boyfriend, that it wasn't just a crush And tell my little sister that she is the only one now And tell my dear sweet grandmother that I'll be waiting for her now And tell my wonderful friends that they were always the best Mummy I'm not the first I'm no better than the rest Mummy tell my teachers I won't show up for class And never to forget this and please don't let this pass Mummy why'd it have to be me no one deserves this Mummy warn the others, mummy I left without a kiss And mummy tell the doctors I know they really did try I think I even saw a doctor trying not to cry Mummy I'm slowly dying with a bullet in my chest But mummy please remember I'm in heaven with the rest Mummy I ran as fast as I could when I heard that crack Mummy listen to me if you would I wanted to go to college I wanted to try things that were new I guess I'm not going with daddy On that trip to the new zoo I wanted to get married I wanted to have a kid I wanted to be an actress Mummy I wanted to live But mummy I must go now The time is getting late Mummy tell my Chris I'm sorry but I had to cancel the date I love you mummy I always have I know you know it's true Mummy all I wanted to say is "mummy I love you" In memory of the Columbian students that were lost Please if you would Pass this around I'd be happy if you could Don't smash this on the ground If you pass this on Maybe people will cry (I know i did) Just keep this in heart For the people that didn't get to say "goodbye" Now you have two choices 1) repost and show you care 2)ignore it and you have just proven you have a low-down, cold-heart (Please just copy and paste this on to your site and show that you care)

Went to a party Mom...

I went to a party, And remembered what you said. You told me not to drink, Mom, so I had a sprite instead. I felt proud of myself, The way you said I would, that I didn't drink and drive, though some friends said I should. I made a healthy choice, And your advice to me was right. The party finally ended, and the kids drove out of sight. I got into my car, Sure to get home in one piece. I never knew what was coming, Mom, something I expected least. Now I'm lying on the pavement, And I hear the policeman say, the kid that caused this wreck was drunk, Mom, his voice seems far away. My own blood's all around me, As I try hard not to cry. I can hear the paramedic say, this girl is going to die. I'm sure the guy had no idea, While he was flying high. Because he chose to drink and drive, now I would have to die. So why do people do it, Mom Knowing that it ruins lives? And now the pain is cutting me, like a hundred stabbing knives. Tell sister not to be afraid, Mom Tell daddy to be brave. And when I go to heaven, put ' Mommy's Girl' on my grave. Someone should have taught him, That it's wrong to drink and drive. Maybe if his parents had, I'd still be alive. My breath is getting shorter, Mom I'm getting really scared These are my final moments, and I'm so unprepared. I wish that you could hold me Mom, As I lie here and die. I wish that I could say, 'I love you, Mom!' So I love you and goodbye.

Read this and if you and if you don't cry, or at least feel emotion, there's something wrong with you

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile

In Remembrance: In Remembrance to Severus Snape, A Slytherin who died like a Gryffindor,

but without all the red and gold crap,

In Remembrance to Fred Weasley, Who fought bravely to the very end, And whose jokes will forever brighten his other half, And will loyally await his soul mate and brother, With many jokes, He's got forever to think of them, right?

In Remembrance to Dobby, Who was more free and full of love, Than any elf, and most humans.

In Remembrance to Remus J. Lupin, The last real Marauder, Who was not just a wonderful father, An incredible husband and a brave hero, As well as an awesome werewolf,

In Remembrance to Nymphadora Tonks, Who died for the greater good, And would probably hex me for calling her Nymphadora,

In Remembrance to Alastair 'Mad Eye' Moody, Who's motto 'Constance Vigilance' kept him alive,

In Remembrance to Tom Marvolo Riddle, A.K.A Voldemort, Who was pretty cool and cute when he was younger, But who got his ass kicked thoroughly in the end,

In Remembrance to Albus Dumbledore, Whose past and wisdom confused us, Whose seeming betrayal shocked us, But who actually turned out to be an okay guy in the end,

In Remembrance to Bellatrix Lestrange, Because it was awesome how Molly Weasley got her with the Avada Kedavra, She deserved everything she got in the end,

In Remembrance to Colin Creevey, Who we really didn't know too well, But took a lot of pictures and died fighting in the war, So he must've done something good... Besides stalking Harry,

In Remembrance to Hedwig, Harry's first real friend, Who lived and died soaring.

If you cried while reading this (like i did) copy and paste this. If you didn't, do it anyway for those who look at your profile and copy and this stuff.

RACISM IS WRONG!

Racism is wrong and can often times destroy people's self confidence. It's a horrible and cruel way to treat people. To prove that we are all alike, try this simple experiment: Hold your hand up to a light of some kind. You'll see a shadow cast nearby. Now, have someone of a different race hold their hand up too. You'll see, essentially, the same image. Five fingers and a palm. Skin color doesn't matter when you get right down to it. If you are against racism, copy this message.

"Power doesn't always make a monster, people do."

A man can smile, and smile, and be a villain. Shakespeare

If wishes were fishes we'd all live in the sea.

Normality is relative, and every one is insane to some one else's view of normal.

Being normal is vastly overrated! - Aggie Cromwell in Halloweentown

Professionals are predictable; it’s the amateurs that are dangerous.

Even the wise cannot see all ends.

Man is many things, but he is not rational.

A man once said, ”Genius is not being very smart, genius is thinking different from others.”

Man’s purpose is what he makes it to be. Scientists can argue over the facts all they want, but it’s always your choice on what you want your purpose to be, at one point or another in your life.

Experience is what causes a person to make new mistakes instead of old ones.

Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together.

If you cried during/after reading Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, copy this to your profile

If you're in denial over Tonks and Lupins death's copy and paste this into your profile.

If you loved DH, HBP, OotP, GoF, PoA, CoS, and SS/PS, and know what all those initials stand for, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that Harry/Hermione shippers are entitled to their own opinion, copy this into your profile.

If you think that Hermione/Snape are okay,but not as awesome as Hermione/Fred shippers, copy this onto your profile

If you cried when Fred Weasley died (in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows), and not afraid to admit it, copy, paste this on your profile.

If you cried when Dobby died (in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows), copy and paste this into your profile

If you want J.K.R. to make a series about the Marauders, copy this into your profile.

If you love Harry Potter, copy this into your profile.

If you make random Harry Potter references to your friends to see if they get them (they never do) put this in your profile.

If you love the Marauders AND think they are THE best, copy this into your profile.

If you liked Snape after Deathy Hallows copy and paste this in your profile.

If you always mentally make the Sirius "serious" pun whenever somebody says, "I'm serious!" copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are a Harry/Draco, Ron/Hermione, Remus/Tonks shipper and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you read Deathly Hallows in under a week, copy and paste this

If you think Remus Lupin deserves more cuddles than Jacob Black, copy this to your profile.

If someone asks you what you want for your birthday, and you reply, "An owl, so we can keep in touch when I leave for Hogwarts!" copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you wanted to punch Remus Lupin in the gut for thinking that he was "too old" for Tonks, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you agree that Tonks is a way better nickname than Dora (as in Nymphadora), copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you agree Pansy Parkinson should be sent to a Dog Kennel, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you LOVE IT when you stumble across a Draco X Harry slash, copy and paste this to your profile.

CATCHPHRASE TIME!! Ron's: Bloody hell. & Are you MENTAL? Hermione's: I've got to go to the library! Harry's: Er.

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree. The
boys dont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree

Things i shouldn't (minus the not) do at Hogwarts: "Refer to Neville Longbottom as the Cowardly Lion, Ron Weasley as the Scarecrow, Draco Malfoy as the Tin Man, Hermione Granger as Dorothy, Dumbledore as the Wizard of Oz, Professor McGonagall as the Good Witch of the North, and Professor Umbridge as the Wicked Witch of the West."

Professor Flitwick … does not know where Snow White is.

Professor Snape … has no wish to get in touch with his ‘feminine side’.

Professor Lupin … has no need for a flea collar. Ever.

Professor Moody … the best ‘teaching’ Hoqwarts has seen in a while.

Professor McGonagall … does not take herself too seriously. It is a bad idea to tell her.

Professor Dumbledore … should be referred to as ‘Professor’, ‘Headmaster’ or ‘Sir’, not ‘Dude’, ‘My Leige’ or ‘Tim the Enchanter’.

Harry Potter … is more Emo than Draco Malfoy.

Draco Malfoy … disagrees.

Hermione Granger … has PMS and a wand.

Ron Weasley … is very afraid.

Luna Lovegood … is perfectly sane, thanks very much.

Ginny Weasley … wants her Hogwarts toilet seat.

Fred Weasley … knows if he and his twin giggle at an idea for more than fifteen seconds, they may assume that it’s against the rules and therefore should not carry it out.

George Weasley … knows he and his twin will carry it out and are not remotely sorry.

Lily Evans … swears she is not in love with James Potter.

James Potter … doesn’t believe her.

Remus Lupin … would prefer less jokes about ‘his time of the month’.

Sirius Black … killed by drapery.

Andromeda Black … is going to marry a muggle – screw the consequences.

Bellatrix Black … is quietly going insane.

Narcissa Black … would like a new hairbrush.

Lucius Malfoy … does not like to be referred to as ‘Luscious Mouthful’.

Voldemort … does not think it would be funny if HP were to put on earmuffs and pulled out a mandrake in his presence.

Gryffindors … will jump off a cliff.

Slytherins … will push someone else off.

Hufflepuffs… will call five hundred others and build a staircase.

Ravenclaws … will get hold of a flying carpet.

Read this and if you and if you don't cry there's something wrong with you.

A Dads Poem

Her hair was up in a pony tail, her favorite dress tied with a bow.

Today was Daddy's Day at school, and she couldn't wait to go. But her mommy tried to tell her, that she probably should stay home.

Why the kids might not understand, if she went to school alone.

But she was not afraid; she knew just what to say. What to tell her classmates of why he wasn't there today. But still her mother worried, for her to face this day alone. And that was why once again, she tried to keep her daughter home.

But the little girl went to school eager to tell them all. About a dad she never sees a dad who never calls. There were daddies along the wall in back, for everyone to meet.

Children squirming impatiently, anxious in their seats. one by one the teacher called a student from the class. To introduce their daddy, as seconds slowly passed.

At last the teacher called her name, every child turned to stare. each of them was searching, for a man who wasn't there.

"Where's her daddy at?" she heard a boy call out.

"She probably doesn't have one," another student dared to shout.

And from somewhere near the back, she heard a daddy say, "Looks like another deadbeat dad, too busy to waste his day."

The words did not offend her, she smiled up at her Mom and looked back at her teacher, who told her to go on.

And with hands behind her back, slowly she began to speak. And out from the mouth of a child, came words incredibly unique.

"My Daddy couldn't be here, because he lives so far away. But I know he wishes he could be, since this is such a special day. And though you cannot meet him, I wanted you to know. All about my daddy, and how much he loves me so. He loved to tell me stories, he taught me to ride my bike. He surprised me with pink roses, and taught me to fly a kite. We used to share fudge sundaes, and ice cream in a cone. And though you cannot see him. I'm not standing here alone. "Cause my daddy's always with me, even though we are apart I know because he told me, he'll forever be in my heart"

With that, her little hand reached up, and lay across her chest. Feeling her own heartbeat, beneath her favorite dress. And from somewhere in the crowd of dads, her mother stood in tears. Proudly watching her daughter, who was wise beyond her years. For she stood up for the love of a man not in her life. Doing what was best for her, doing what was right. And when she dropped her hand back down, staring straight into the crowd. She finished with a voice so soft, but its message clear and loud.

"I love my daddy very much, he's my shining star. And if he could, he'd be here, but heaven's just too far. You see he was a fireman and died just this past year when airplanes hit the towers and taught Americans to fear. But sometimes when I close my eyes, it's like he never went away."

And then she closed her eyes, and saw him there that day. And to her mother’s amazement, she witnessed with surprise. A room full of daddies and children, all starting to close their eyes. Who knows what they saw before them, who knows what they felt inside. Perhaps for merely a second, they saw him at her side.

"I know you're with me Daddy," to the silence she called out.

And what happened next made believers, of those once filled with doubt. Not one in that room could explain it, for each of their eyes had been closed. But there on the desk beside her, was a fragrant long-stemmed pink rose.

And a child was blessed, if only for a moment, by the love of her shining star. And given the gift of believing, that heaven is never too far.

‘They’ say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.

Send this to the people you'll never forget and remember to send it also to the person that sent it to you. It's a short message to let them know that you'll never forget them. If you don't send it to anyone, it means you're in a hurry and that you've forgotten your friends.

Take the time...to live and love. Until eternity. May you be blessed.

"if at first you don't succeed, try walking around the brick wall."

"I’m not clumsy…the floor just hates me." Anonymous

"Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door..."

"You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor."

"I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the law."

"Ever stopped to think and forgot to start again?"

"You cry, I cry. You laugh, I laugh. You fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder."

The difference between humor and tragedy is that humor is when it happens to someone else."

"Who ever said that words don't hurt never got hit by a dictionary."

A repair shop: We can repair anything. (Please knock hard on the door - the bell doesn't work)

Girl Comebacks!

Man: Where have you been all my life? Woman: Hiding from you.

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

Man: Your place or mine? Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.

Man: So, what do you do for a living? Woman: I'm a female impersonator.

Man: Hey baby, what's your sign? Woman: Do not enter.

Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman: Unfertilized.

Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.

Man: I would go to the end of the world for you. Woman: But would you stay there?

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Man: Your eyes they're amazing. Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.

“So there are 3 tomatoes. A mother, father and a baby,” Harry started.

“Tomatoes don’t reproduce like that,” Ron said, not getting it.

“It’s a joke Ron…okay so they are going for a hike in the woods and the baby starts to fall behind,” he continues. Everyone is casually listening except Ron who is listening intently for the joke part.

“So the dad tomato runs and squashes the baby and says KETCHUP!” Harry starts to laugh. Hermione looks at him.

“That’s barbaric. How could a dad kill his son?” She says. Ginny laughs at how stupid the joke was and after about 5 minutes Ron starts to laugh.

“What are you laughing at Ron?” Harry asks.

“I get it!” Ron says. The whole group of people around him start to laugh. “What? What’s so funny?” Ron asked confused.

“Nothing Ronald.” Hermione said through muffled giggles.

NOTE: NOT MINE! i found it on Thereareonlythreemarauders profile. i don't know if it comes from one of her stories or not, but whatever. just thought i'd give credit! ;)

I have seen almost every single HP ( except 6), including the awesome part one and 2 of DH.

SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT!

In HP and the DH movie part one, i cried even before the title popped up cuz

of Hermione Obliviating her parents. i didn't cry in the books cuz i was like 'eh'

but seeing it happen just made it so much worse! i laughed later on when

everyone drank the Harry Potter Polyjuice XD but then i cried again when

Hedwig got killed. at the end of the movie i cried cuz Dobby died, and they

didn't even show the tombstone!!! D: of course, they also cut out a lot of

the information that was in the book that was needed. i hate the person

that directed this HP movie. he was an idiot. he doesn't get what

we HP fans have to see in the movie to be satisfied that it's correct. now, part 2.

WHY WHY WHY WHY?! ohmigosh i came SO close tothrowing up when Severus

kept hitting the window. i was bawling my head off from the moment ol' Tommy

boy told Lucius to bring Severus. i didn't stop crying until half-hour after i got home.

seeing Remus and Tonks and Fred just laying on the ground all dead... anyway, the

dragon scene was awesome! and i LOVE the way Bellabitch (Bellatrix) died... *feels

malicious* and when Ron FINALLY got off his arse and kissed Hermione... i was

elated! :D

okay i'm done with my spoiler/rant :)

Is it wierd that I've seen every Twilight movie,yet can't stand Twilight?

Congrats for making it to the end of my profile! Hope you enjoyed it!