Patrick Star told a story to his friend to cheer him up, but he never knew the full tale. He never knew the trials the Ugly Barnacle faced, nor the heartbreak he endured. The story has been lost to time, and remains only as a whisper on the wind. [Satire, parody, occasional strong language.]

When Lightning McQueen gets into a horrible car wreck during a race, Will he survive and be able to race again? Times are really getting tough, and a rival just had to come at the wrong time. Who is this strange car that suddenly wants revenge on McQueen?

DISCLAIMER: I DID NOT WRITE THIS The infamous WORST FANFICTION EVER posted here, unedited, for ur "lulz" -Originally by Tara Gilesbie -Rated M for the "Then he put his thingie into my you-know-what and we did it for the first time." line! -There is more than 1 chap per page

Because the relationship between the Phantom and Christine is far too powerful for mere spoken word; when the music goes quiet, a silent language takes its place...in the form of flowers. A Phantom/Christine told in 250 word drabbles.

AU. In Harry's third year he must learn the many truths about the new DADA teacher, Professor Black, and an escaped convict, Remus Lupin. Eventual SBxRL.

Petunia married a biochemist, and Harry grew up reading science and science fiction. Then came the Hogwarts letter, and a world of intriguing new possibilities to exploit. And new friends, like Hermione Granger, and Professor McGonagall, and Professor Quirrell... COMPLETE.

Harry decides he wants to try Animagi, and persuades Hermione to help... this changes them... a lot. Crossover, of sorts, with Pokemon. Mew!Harry. Not as stupid as it sounds.

The story of Remus Lupin's life, told through a book for his son, Teddy. Non-explicit male on male content from chapter 5. RL/SB.

Takes place right after Randall Boggs was illegally banished.A young Cajun college student saves him.She takes it upon herself to help this unknown creature.But he soon becomes a handful.Always degrading and being snarky but she can't just kick him out.

Harry is sent an anonymous Christmas present; it's time to meet the real Golden Trio… perhaps the adults should run for cover? Warning: OoC, Spoilers to Christmas of OoTP, AU, Crossover.

Photos line the walls, each one has a story to tell. Set in The God Complex simulation pre-The Doctor's arrival. Slight language, and a little bit scary at points.

Pansy preferred shallowness to serious self-reflection. Now forced into exile after the war, she struggles to find a word to describe herself. Entry for Round 1 of the Quidditch League Fanfiction Competition.

TT: So, what are you doing? TG: im on omegle getting hot chicks skype usernames TT: And I presume that you are speaking to one of these "hot chicks"? TG: nah im talking to some guy named the doctor TT: The Doctor?

Full of fansongs written by yours truly! Contains Homestuck parodies, lyrics for already made Homestuck songs, raps and more! I'm open to requests, but most of them will be personal ideas unless otherwise specified. Rated T for curse words. Song 11: A Jade-ified version of "Coward Montblanc".

Set in modern day high school. Erik is a loner. No friends. Christine is beautiful and kind. Erik lusts after her. When they become unlikely friends, she longs to see his face. Will her curiosity turn into much more? WARNING: AWESOMENESS INVOLVED.

What happens when the postman is given a special delivery for someone who never shows up? I do not own Pokémon!

Second entry in the MSEA Files. The sequel to "Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way vs Canon." There's a new Sue in town; Sapphire, an annoyingly smart, annoyingly pure, annoyingly modest, annoyingly pretty, annoyingly sweet, annoyingly desirable girl. You can panic now.

"Dad, how did you get mom pregnant if you should be physically incapable of getting an erection?" In which Edward and Bella give their daughter the talk only to find she knows more than they thought. CRACK.

Severus Snape has an accident with a time turner, ends up in early 20th century France. Written as a Christmas present for my roommate. Not romance - just a "wouldn't it be fun if they met" fic.

After the kiss, Erik wakes up to find himself on the set of the 2004 movie, playing himself. At the same time, Gerry is taken back to 1870 and is now the actual Opera Ghost. Someone must have divided by zero.

What if, instead of a human becoming a ghost, a ghost... became human?

The Story of Voldemort's daughter as she accepts her destiny

The wily warrior, lost half a world from home. The wily hunter, trapped and expected to die. Both the cleverest of their times. How would Odysseus and Foxface compare?

Dib never expected that tripping Zim on the way home from Skool would change everything. But when Zim wakes up with amnesia, things start to get serious. NOT ZimxDib, no matter how much it seems like it. NOT DEAD!

Ted plus Internet. Marshall plus conspiracy theories. Robin is relieved that it's not another cat video. Oneshot.

Someone's been sending England flowers that all represent love, since a week from Valentine's Day. Will he find out who it is and why the person has been doing it? Written for Valentine's Day, rated T for language. USUK.

James is convinced there's a werewolf at Hogwarts. Sirius and Peter aren't so sure...

First entry in the MSEA Files. There's a new student at Hogwarts by the name of Ebony Way, and she seems pretty screwed up in the head. Rated T for language and canon rape. And eye rape, probably.

Twenty-six new contestants-one for each letter of the alphabet-are competing in the sequel to Total Drama Chris. Day 12 has ended: everyone's had their fun at Izzy's amusement park, but who's had enough? And who is the eleventh person voted out?

A ghost hybrid, a psychic detective, a ghost hunter's conference in Santa Barbara, and a teensy little murder investigation with Danny as the suspect. What can possibly go wrong?

Lightning McQueen has the most biggest and unexpected surprise for his Girlfriend, Sally Carrera. But she also has a surprise for Lightning that he probably would have never expected to happen yet... What's the big secret she's hiding? -HUMANIZED- R&R!

"Achillea Millefolia, Tom." - This was for the 'Flower Language' challenge.

The epic Twilight saga, complete with sparkly vampires, hot shirtless werewolves and one stupid human. Now with FREE swearing and sexual references!

My own sequel to Cars 2. An enemy agent has a bone to pick with Mater and his spy buddies, and will do anything for revenge. Even if it means blackmailing another car. A monster is about to be unleashed. Will Mater and co. stop it in time? Find Out! R&R.

Meg takes notice of something no one else seems to see...

Cars 2. SPOILERS. During a quiet night of a mission with Finn, Holley reflects on the incident in the clock tower and her relationship with her new field partner. Slight to moderate Holly/Finn, pure cotton-candyish fluff.

A girl by the name of Millie finds her way through life with the help of her family and friends. MCR fanfiction.

US/UK fics about flowers and their meanings. A chance encounter in the kitchen may be the only chance America would ever have to figure what his feelings truly are, and what he really wants. Last chapter!

... Are the inmates! Jeremy Johnson is a new doctor at the Danville Mental Rehabilitation Center; where he goes on fun and terrifying adventures with the some of the best people he's ever known. Too bad they're the patients.

Harry has a dream and takes the Order along with him. What will they do? Who will they encounter? And why is Harry wearing ruby-red trainers?

After losing everything except his life in a tragic accident, James finds himself starting over. He opens a flower shop, and enjoys success. What he didn't count on was seeing a familiar face from his past, and the events that occur thereafter. JAML

Semi-based on AVPM/S. James and Lily's wedding was...interesting, to say the least.

Crossover HP and Beauty and the Beast. Because of a spell cast by Grindlewald just before his death, Albus was transformed into a hideous beast. Who could ever learn to love a beast?

Take a large chocolate factory, an eccentric Chocolatier, five Golden Ticket winners and their family members. Throw it all together and it makes a GREAT story. Throwing a witch in the mix? Well... that makes a different story altogether...

James, Remus, and Sirius are given a laptop and stumble upon fanfiction. This is their reactions! -COMPLETE!-

Love potions, hallucinations and slash ahoy! AU, slash

Strong Bad's always had an active imagination. So when he suspects Homestar Runner of being a robot, no one believes him. But what if he was right? AU, slash

Voldemort decides on creating another Horcrux, and Snape is rendered speechless at what it is. Oneshot. /AVPM-related/

Memoria, memory, memorial: there are languages that speak louder than words, and Neville Longbottom speaks them.

He expresses himself through floriography — US/UK. Rated for hints at self-harm and other mature themes.

What if these things happened? A list of what-ifs from harry Potter. Could be used as a prompt list.

Teddy Lupin enjoyed researching every type of flower that could somehow be construed to mean love.

The Malfoys take an evening walk through the Malfoy Manor gardens, and Narcissa teaches Lucius about the language of flowers. LMxNM.

What if Harry never hid his Curse from his friends and professors when they were reunited that summer.

Carly's cousin Jade is experiencing the Pokemon world firsthand. Can she deal with her feelings for the Violet City Gym Leader, help stop an evil organization, AND find out about her real past? *Somewhat AU* *OC x Falkner*

If there's a Dark Dragon, why not a Light Dragon?

Do your fanfics suck? Make them suck less by following these steps.

A year after Total Drama Island, Chris has the 22 contestants return for more horrible challenges. Heather struggles with her past misdeeds, Lindsay struggles not to be stupid, and a lot more involving your favorite campers in a new season of the show!

Hermione and Viktor both receive offers to teach at Hogwarts and they haven't seen each other in over 10 years. Are they as close as they once were? Or even closer? Had to move the rating up to T for chapter 9...it has some not so happy language in it.

Tohru goes to Hogwarts. Bad summary, I know, but if you want more, read the fanfic. For now genre will be friendship, but it may change, depends on where I take this. ON HOLD

ON HIATUS / Welcome to the Pretty Skitty Cafe, where the girls are adorable, the boys are delicious, and the kitchen's even yummier! With frilly pink uniforms, Skittys up to her ears, and a cast of colourful characters, Kim's life is about to become a rollercoaster.

Esme and Renesmee enjoy a quiet afternoon planting flowers. A very cute, fluffy one-shot sure to bring the warm fuzzies!

After Penny's tragic death, Captain Hammer attempts therapy.

Ever wonder 'Why don't they just do that' "A lot of the greatest wizards haven't got an ounce of logic." Harry and Hermione, however, were raised in the muggle world and are therefore fully capable of thinking things through...A collection of of one-shots

So maybe everything didn't work out perfectly for Harry. Still, most of his friends survived, he'd gotten married, and was about to become a father. If only he'd have stayed away from the Veil, he wouldn't have had to go back and do everything AGAIN.

One-shot. Movie night at the Tower becomes weirder when the Titans see a little of themselves in the characters. Meta rambling ensues, featuring Disney's "Enchanted" as the medium. Rob/Star and BB/Rae

A series of 101 drabbles. Please Read and Review! I don't own anything!

Yes, this is the fic you think it is. Goths, slash, het, Mary-Sue OCs, vampires, crappy writing, swearing Dumbledore, cliffhangers, OOC situations continuously, senseless plot, hackers, uncared for Muggle activities, wagnst… R&R. The worst fic ever made.

Crazy pokemon/harry potter fanfic....my first crossover. Please review!

I wrote this when I was at a sleepover....! FLUFF! Plz review!

It is a sappy, half baked, over the top, romance novel but instead of rotting away in cheap-buys bins and magazine racks, it's at the top of the best-seller list. And that really bothers me, so lets go in depth to the Reasons why Twilight SUCKS.

Based on Staria 007's story "HP Curse of the Elemental". Harry Potter and five other Hogwarts students must master a new form of magic to take down Voldemort and his new ally Noxus, Lord of Shadows. Slight gender bender. Rated T for safety.

While on break Hermione stumbles upon Harry Potter fanfiction and decides to make a list of things that are inaccurate about them. Complete for now, but I might add more to the list later.

Why did Edward stop hunting criminals? During those brief ten years, he was just like a superhero...So why? Because he met someone. A man named Sherlock Holmes.

Chronicling Dumbledore's never-ending and sometimes desperate attempts to fill the Defense Against the Dark Arts position with anyone but Snape and Snape's persistent attempts to land the job anyway.

Shamelessly playing on the fact that they are played by the same actor, the true backstory of Edward Cullen is revealed, at last!

For Danny Fenton, death has come sooner than for most. But when he has the chance to go home, to protect the ones he cares most about, how he can he say anything but yes? There’s only one catch: No one can know that he isn’t a mortal anymore. DxS HIATUS

My take on the 100 Drabble Challenge as issued on deviantART. Written, obviously. Romance, angst, drama, tragedy, and sneak peaks at various ideas sitting on my hard drive. Challenged by Me The Anon One.

Harry gains these new abilities and this knowledge about creatures that he never even knew existed. Harry Potter/Poke'mon crossover. First crossover story, hope you like it.

Sirius tells Remus that the Marauders are going to become Animagi for him - includes Butterbeer, Broomsticks, and good ol' fluff. Challenge fic. Remus/Sirius slash!

What happens when Danny Phantom, Ben 10, AND American Dragon:Jake Long meet. Well you have to read the story to find out. Teen Titans added in later chapters. Editing. Rated for mild cursing.

COMPLETE. Two years after defeating Voldemort, Harry falls into an alternate dimension with his godfather. Together, they embark on a new life filled with drunken debauchery, thievery, and generally antagonizing all their old family, friends, and enemies.

Sam suffers everyday for Danny's death and keeps blaming herself. But what happens when he returns from the dead? Rated for later chapters.

My first fanfic. What might've happened if Voldemort had a daughter? HIATUS.

After fourth year, Harry had a agruement with his relatives, and runs off into the woods, where he is cursed for the rest of his life. Warning Gender bender story. Pairings HP,CL,GW NL,LL

Post Deathly Hallows. There is peace Beyond the Veil... At least, until an argument breaks out amongst the Marauders.

Okay, just a bunch of oneshots that pop in my head. I'm gonna try to make it to 100. Mostly DxS.

Danny hears a VERY awkward conversation between Dash and Sam. Rated for how your mind interperates things.

On a rainy Saturday afternoon, Vlad remembers something that no one could ever imagine... his daughter.

We first met him as Doc Hudson. Then... The Fabulous Hudson Hornet... But before that... He was just Jesse Hudson. A street kid the world forgot.

A list of absolute no nos when residing with Erik.

Alternate Universe. After being given a second chance after her death Sam makes sure no one will have to suffer the death she did, but what happens when she meets a certain ghost boy...

Book II of the Ember Trilogy. Ember has no memory of her life, and wants to know about it. She, Danny, Sam, and Tucker go on a quest in the Ghost Zone to find the answers.

A brief rewrite of Phantom of the Opera, done in the style of the Dick and Jane books. (You know, "See Spot run," and all that.) Light, parody fun. Enjoy!

Book I of the Ember Trilogy After "Fanning the Flames", Ember is brought back from the Ghost Zone by Vlad Masters, and sent to destroy Danny against her will.

Marzipan visits Strong Sad. He's been taking some new medicine and has been experiencing some changes. This story starts off slow, but please read all of it.

What is up with the Strong Brothers? What is the relationship with Homsar and Homestar? These questions and more answered.

HPThe Last Unicorn Xover Harry, pregnant, dying, encounters one of his ancestors. One Shot

... or, Draco Dracianna. Based on Cassandra Claire's "Draco Dormiens"--- when a polyjuice potion goes wrong, Harry and Draco get stuck looking like each other. But what if Draco's really a girl?!