Kili and Fili Inc
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Joined 05-15-14, id: 5732163, Profile Updated: 08-31-14
Author has written 4 stories for Hobbit, Lord of the Rings, Ranger's Apprentice, and Frozen.

Hey everybody! We are Kili and Fili! (No, I'm not Smeagol speaking in plural form, this is literally two people here.) ;)

Anyways, we will probably write mostly parodies, our specialty. Our first parody? Well, thank your for asking. Our first parody will be "A Calculating Problem." Hehehe. And you'll just have to wait and see what THAT one's about. I know, we've come up with so many funny stories, don't be afraid to cry, 'cause you'll probably get a little bit...well, a lot bit...overwhelmed with laughs.

OUR NEXT PARODY SHOULD BE UP BY MIDNIGHT ON SEPTEMBER 19th. Yes, we're planning to stay up all night writing it. :P

First, let's hear a little bit about Fili, (who only gets to go first because she's older) *pouts in a corner* Me: I WANTED TO GO FIRST! *throws flower vase at Fili*.

Sup dude!! I'm Fili the Awesome. (You can call me Fili, if you want to) A little bit about me...hmm...lets see:

1) I am TOTALLY A LEGOLAS FANGIRL!!! And for any of you girls try to take him, He's MINE!!! ( I am NOT GAY!! I AM A FEMALE!!!)

2) My sister and I share most of the same things so if this sounds redundant than...well, sorry deal with it.

3) I watch only one tv show and it's Burn Notice. I know pretty awesome. *sarcastic eye rolling*

4) I play sports. Only softball though, sometimes I'll call it baseball cause I can play just as good as any boy could. And I'm not lie'n.

5) Last but not least I LOVE: Narnia, Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, Star Trek, Pirates of the Caribbean, and I guess the Hunger Games is ok. I only like the first one, really.

So now back to Kili who will probs do most of the talking, 'cause I'm the quieter one of the two of us. :)

Now, here's a bit about me, Kili. And even though my name is Kili doesn't mean I'm a guy. I'm 100% female. :D

1. My heart is a prisoner to...well...let's just say the Heir of Isildur, the Hope of Middle-Earth, Son of Arathorn... *sighs dreamily.* And if you don't know who I'm talking about then you must not be a Lord of the Rings lover so scram.

Sorry about that. I got a little bit angry for a minute at all those people who just don't seem to know who ARAGORN IS!!! That's what makes me SO mad. And when people call him Strider. I'm the only one who can call him Strider...well, besides the hobbits, of course.

2. I watch the TV show Burn Notice. Which is super cool. In case you haven't noticed.

3. Uh, I'm a Hobbit fan (anxiously awaiting The Battle of Five Armies--the 3rd Hobbit movie. Woohoo!) LOTR fan, Narnia fan, Star Wars/Clone Wars fan, Pegasus (by Kate O'Hearn) fan, and Pirates of the Caribbean, and uh...well...Hunger Games kind of...I guess. Oh, yeah. And Burn Notice. As you can probably tell, I'm a little more...talkative that Fi. She's kind of...laid back.

Well, we can't wait to see ya'll at our stories! Parodies, actually. So, if you're ready for some big laughs...then come on down to...KILI AND FILI INC.!!!!! (yeah, I know. That lines is from the Price Is Right. Except for the Kili and Fili Inc. part. That's ours. Not theirs.)

We're both in highschool and we both love zebras. All right, fine. *After a heated argument* FiFi wants to say she likes lions, too. I don't. But she does.

Just one more thing about us, we will not tolerate any cussing unless you wanna pay a quarter to the Cuss Jar. It will be at all of our stories. We'll be waiting for someone to slip up so we can get paid. No I'm just kidding we don't get paid for this. JK. no I didn't mean that. JK. You're not gonna fall for that again, are you? yeesh.

Sorry, Kili got control of the keyboard for a minute and I had to wrestle her away. (No, not really)

Last thing I have to say is that we are both Christians and we both believe that Jesus Christ came down to earth to die on the cross for your sins and mine. And that is why our cuss jar is pretty empty right now.

I Thessalonians 5:15

"See that none render evil for evil unto any man; but ever follow that which is good, both among yourselves, and to all men." KJV

Okay, so, at the end of each chapter of our stories we will have the name and artist of an awesome song that we like, which most of them will be Christian songs we have heard on Air1 (91.9), the totally awesome radio station. Well, some of the songs they don't play on that station, but they are by good bands with awesome talent and a great message.

If you would like some other great authors to check out, look at our favorites tab which is right below our profile.

Kili and Fili

FOR GONDOR!!!!

FOR FRODO!

FOR ASLAN!

FOR NARNIA!

FOR...uh...Davy Jones?! Wait, what?...

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

The Arda Campaign by Lord Exar Kun reviews
When a Separatist anti-gravity well generator prototype goes haywire Jedi knights Obi-Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker will find themselves blasted into a strange world called Arda. Where they will join on a quest to destroy this strange thing called the Ring of Power. However general Grievous a mysterious dark Jedi and a droid army have also landed in the realm of Shadow in Mordor.
Crossover - Star Wars & Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Fantasy - Chapters: 45 - Words: 482,230 - Reviews: 457 - Favs: 325 - Follows: 310 - Updated: 11/28/2018 - Published: 9/13/2013 - Anakin Skywalker, Obi-Wan K., General Grievous, Aragorn - Complete
The Chronicels of the mixed up people by EvenstarWarrior reviews
What happens when Legolas ends up on the HOME I, and is confronted by Luke Skywalker? When Princess Leia meets the Narnians for the first time? Or when two Sith Lords meet the Dark Lord Sauron? When Aragorn is imprisoned by Miraz, how will he escape? Will Edmund help what remains of the Fellowship? Find out what happens.
Crossover - Star Wars & Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Sci-Fi/Fantasy - Chapters: 9 - Words: 17,860 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 14 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 7/26/2015 - Published: 4/13/2014 - Luke S., Darth Vader, Aragorn, Legolas
A Tale of Two Rangers by NarusseRussandol reviews
Aragorn and Faramir, missing their old lives as rangers, decide to spend a week in Ithilien. A chance meeting with bandits has dastardly consequences. COMPLETE!
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Angst - Chapters: 23 - Words: 44,346 - Reviews: 121 - Favs: 28 - Follows: 35 - Updated: 7/5/2014 - Published: 2/14/2014 - Aragorn, Faramir - Complete
Hunting Orc by BlackShaftedArrow reviews
When Faramir and Aragorn are captured by Orcs, it is up to Legolas to rescue them. But with Faramir injured, it proves to be harder than the elf thought. NO SLASH CHAPTER 13 REVISED! So, if you were as annoyed with Elrond treating Aragorn before Faramir, then there you go! :)
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 13 - Words: 18,983 - Reviews: 95 - Favs: 30 - Follows: 25 - Updated: 6/9/2014 - Published: 4/8/2014 - Aragorn, Legolas, Faramir, Elrohir - Complete
Wayfaring Strangers by MorierBlackleaf reviews
As a child who seeks to prove himself to his Elven foster family, Estel has run away from Rivendell, only to be found by a Wood-Elf who was on his way to the hidden valley. When the two are attacked by Orcs, Estel is then faced with keeping both Legolas and himself alive in the woods, while injured, lost, and without supplies. Has a K(plus) rating for mild violence. AU
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Adventure/Friendship - Chapters: 24 - Words: 72,743 - Reviews: 127 - Favs: 191 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 4/11/2014 - Published: 3/11/2014 - Aragorn, Legolas, Elrohir, Elladan - Complete
Strangers From Distant Lands by Keldae reviews
A ship bearing four Jedi crash-lands on a strange, backwater planet. With no way to get back to the Republic, the Jedi offer their services to a planet-wide war that may affect the rest of the galaxy...
Crossover - Star Wars & Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Drama/Adventure - Chapters: 6 - Words: 20,020 - Reviews: 206 - Favs: 252 - Follows: 375 - Updated: 12/27/2013 - Published: 8/14/2011 - Obi-Wan K., Qui-Gon J., Frodo B., Aragorn
Lord of the Hunger Games by Archiril reviews
A new version of the famous books. What if Aragorn and Legolas in Northern Fangorn accidently turn up behind the fence of District Twelve and are forced to enter the Hunger Games? I made it as realistic as possible, so please R&R! : NO SLASH!
Crossover - Lord of the Rings & Hunger Games - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Mystery - Chapters: 20 - Words: 53,064 - Reviews: 260 - Favs: 145 - Follows: 100 - Updated: 8/22/2012 - Published: 3/29/2012 - Legolas, Katniss E. - Complete
By a Friend's Hand by Niroveka reviews
First Place Winner for the Mellon Chronicles Jan. FF Contest. They are the best of friends, they will die for each other...but what will happen when they are cast into a unknown world, and are forced to live their worst nightmare? NONSLASH
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,546 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 58 - Follows: 8 - Published: 2/23/2005 - Aragorn, Legolas - Complete
Mire by Cheryl W reviews
Aragorn is injured in a mire. (no slash) Story is now Complete
Lord of the Rings - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 9 - Words: 38,515 - Reviews: 225 - Favs: 180 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 11/11/2003 - Published: 10/14/2003 - Aragorn - Complete
Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Araluen: Frozen reviews
When Araluen gets hooked on 'Frozen' songs (featuring Let It Go feat. Gilan Davidson) Halt is driven up the wall. Chaos ensues. Rated T for mild references to alcohol and the word 'hell'. Which is only said like once. NO SLASH
Crossover - Ranger's Apprentice & Frozen - Rated: T - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,620 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 5 - Published: 10/24/2014 - Halt, Will, Gilan, King Duncan - Complete
The Arena of Doom reviews
Welcome to the Arena of Doom, the place Lord of the Rings characters meet their demise...and sometimes it can be quite gruesome. NO SLASH
Lord of the Rings - Rated: K+ - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,116 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 1 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/24/2014 - Denethor, Aragorn, Faramir, Legolas - Complete
Kili's Blind Date reviews
When Kili gets a message from Christian Mingle that they found him a match, he goes on a interesting date with...someone.
Hobbit - Rated: K - English - Parody/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,128 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 1 - Published: 5/26/2014 - Fíli, Kíli, Tauriel - Complete
A Calculating Problem reviews
When a calculator falls into Middle-Earth and lands in the middle of the company of thirteen dwarves, and one wizard, and one hobbit, things get interesting...Read if you like to laugh.
Hobbit - Rated: K - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,484 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 5/25/2014 - Fíli, Gandalf, Kíli, Bilbo B. - Complete