![]() I love to read fanfics about twilight, Gallagher girls, maximum ride(the lake house),heist society and more.. I am the girl that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the girl that people look through when I say something. I am the girl that spends most of her free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the girl that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the girl that doesn't spend all her time on MySpace, or talking to a girlfriend on a cell phone or regular phone. I am the girl that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the girl that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the girl who knows and is proud to be who she is, doesn’t care if people call her weird (it's a compliment), who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with Twilight and Maximum Ride, who can express herself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a guy to complete her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the girls who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not alone: Iheartjake, TeamJacob101, Boysareadrag, The Dawn Is Breaking, twilite addict, The Lonely Teenager, AliceDaSpaz, Skittle.Rocke, Silent_Broken_Heart, St. Fang of Boredom, Nova Ride, IheartZacharyGoode. XJamesBondX x--Converse-Queen--x ~TWILIGHT OATH~ And I promise to remember Esme 1. You accidentally enter your password on a microwave. 98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile. If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile. It takes 47 muscles to frown, 13 to smile and absolutely none to sit there with a dumb look on your face. there were 3girls They were looking through peoples The girl slowly came upon this one It had creatures in the background and the man She started laughing with her friend commenting on how ugly he was. Right then, an instant message came up. It said: SatanStalker: So how do u like my XxLoVemExX: What?? XxLoVemExX: Who is this anyway?? SatanStalker: Well, you should know; XxLoVemExX: How do you know that im looking at ur pro?? SatanStalker:I know when people look at my MySpace. XxLoVemExX: What? That doesnt make SatanStalker: I just do. Satanstalker: Especially to pretty girls like you. Satanstalker: With very nice legs I might say. At the time the girl was wearing high She started to pull them down a little bit to cover what XxLoVemExX: Ok whatever man youre starting to scare the living sht out of me. SatanStalker: You should be afraid. SatanStalker: You wouldnt want an ugly guy like me touching your legs huh? I mean thats what you They were in shock. Her friend: Holy crap man just block him The girl: Ok holy crap, you think hes SatanStalker: I am. SatanStalker: Well it wouldnt really XxLoVemExX: What? My house? SatanStalker: Yeah, youre alone so its XxLoVemExX: Ok I think Im going to leave now because youre freaking me out. SatanStalker: Your screen name says SatanStalker has just signed off. The girl and her friend were really friend: Whatever lets just go upstairs trust me I doubt hes really coming. Its just a joke from someone. They went upstairs and were having a pillow fight. All of a sudden the girls friend said she had to go to the bathroom. The girl said ok. Ten minutes later the girl noticed that her friend was She goes and knocks but no one said she opens it and finds her friend there on her neck sliced with blood all over the ground. with her head nailed to the wall. Just her head. If you do not repost this in the next two one in your room, and one killing your parents at that Tonight at 1:30am. Well what are you waiting for? Repost or you are going to die. The Percy Jackson Pledge: I promise to remember Percy I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool! You know you live in 2009 when... 1. You accidentally enter your password on a microwave. 2. Hi. 3. The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they don't have AIM/LiveJournal/MySpace. 4. You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the TV. 6. Your evening activity is sitting at the computer. 7.As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends. 8. You read this list, and keep nodding and smiling. 9. You think about how stupid you are for reading this. 10. You were too busy to notice number five. 11. You actually scrolled back up to check if there was a number five. 12. And now you're laughing at your stupidity. 13. Put this in your pro if you fell for it. You know you did. BLONDE LOGIC January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight. February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels..."duh"...bottles won't fit in typewriter!! March - Got excited...finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months...box said "2-4 years!" April - Trapped on escalator for hours...power went out!! May - Tried to make Kool-Aid...8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!! June - Tried to go water skiing...couldn't find a lake with a slope. July - Lost breast stroke swimming competition...learned later, other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!! August - Got locked out of car in rain storm...car swamped, because top was down. September - The capital of California is "C"...isn't it?? October - Hate M & M's...they are so hard to peel. November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days...instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!! December - Couldn't call 911..."duh"...there's no "eleven" button on the phone!! What a year! 16 ways to maintain a Healthy level of insanity 1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars, see if they slow down. 2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don’t disguise your voice. 3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that. 4. Put a garbage can on your desk and label it “IN” 5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone is over their Caffeine addictions, switch to expresso. 6. Finish all your sentences with “In Accordance to the Prophecy”. 7. Dont use any punctuation 8. As often as possible, skip rather than walk. 9. Specify that your drive thru order is “To Go” 10. Sing Along at the Opera 11. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don’t rhyme. 12. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day. 13. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream “I WON I WON!!” 14. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling “Run for your lives, they’re loose!!” 15. Tell your children over dinner, “Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go.” 16. Send this to your friends to make them smile, It’s called therapy. 23 Ways To Annoy People In An Elevator 1)CRACK open your bag, peer Inside and ask “Got enough air 2) STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting 3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, 4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you 5) MEOW occasionally. 6) STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: “You’re 7) SAY -DING at each floor. 8) SAY “I wonder what all these do?” And push all the buttons. 9) MAKE explosion noises when someone presses a button. 10) STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: “I have 11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: “Is that your beeper?” 12) TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone. 13) DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other 14) WHEN there’s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the 15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back 16) ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones. 17) HOLD the doors open and say you’re waiting for your friend. After a 18) DROP a pen and wail until someone reaches to help pick it up, then 19) BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift. 20) PRETEND you’re a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and 21) SWAT at flies that don’t exist. 22) CALL out “Group hug” then enforce it. 23) When the lift is going down scream “we’re gonna die" Check this out... I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool! 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. "If you two are going to kill each other, at least do it outside. I just finished cleaning!" 2. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. "If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week." 3. My mother taught me LOGIC. "Because I said so, that's why." 4. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you aren't coming to the store with me!" 5. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. "Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident. 6. My mother taught IRONY. "Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about." 7. My mother taught me about THE SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS. "Shut your mouth and eat your supper!" 8. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. "Will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck!" 9. My mother taught me about STAMINA. "You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone." 10. My mother taught me about WEATHER. "Your room looks like a tornado went through there!" 11. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. "If I've told you once, I've told you a million times, don't exaggerate!" 12. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. "I brought you into this world, and I can take you out of it too!" 13. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. "Stop acting like your father!" 14. My mother taught me about ENVY. "There are millions of less fortunate children around the world who don't have wonderful parents like you do!" 15. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION. "Just wait until we get home!" 16. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. "You're going to get it when we get home!" 17. My mother taught me about MEDICAL SCIENCE. "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they're going to freeze that way!" 18. My mother taught me about ESP. "Put your sweater on! Don't you think I know when you're cold?" 19. My mother taught me HUMOR. "When the lawnmower cuts off you toes, don't come crying to me!" 20. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up." 21. My mother taught me GENETICS. "You're just like your father." 22. My mother taught me about MY ROOTS. "Shut that door! Do you think you were raised in a barn?" 23. My mother taught me WISDOM. "When you're my age, you'll understand." 24. My mother taught me JUSTICE. "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!" Here's a joke... there are 3 men who need to get across a lake... the 1st one prays to God asking for the strength to get across... he gets big muscles and swims across... but almost dies 5 times... the 2nd 1 prays to God for the strength and the tools he needs to get across... he gets his big muscles and boat and rows across... but he almost dies 3 times... the 3rd 1 prays to God, for the strength, tools, and the brains... he turns into a woman... walks 4 yards... and crosses the bridge Your a book-aholic if... You can randomly open to a page and know exactly what's going on. Read the book until 4 A.M., then get back up at 7 to continue reading. You write fanfictions about the book. You try to get all of your friends (and everyone else in the entire world) to read it. Everything reminds you of the book. You quote random lines all the time. You've gotten incredibly bored in class, and debated on doing something your favorite character can do to escape the class You've read a book more than five times. You've read a book with 400+ pages in less than two days. You've found yourself trying to impersonate a character. If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile. If you ever tripped over your own feet, copy this into your profile. If you're one of those people who gets excited at just two Reviews copy this into your profile. If you ever wondered who made up all the 'copy this into your profile' thingies then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE! If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile If you think that disclaimers are the most annoying things EVER Copy and paste this to your profile. you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, copy this into your profile. If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile. If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE! If you have inside jokes...with yourself...copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever ran into a tree, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile. If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your pro! I'm the kind of person that walks into a door and apologizes. At last! My plans for world domination are complete! MAHAHAHAA? Oh look, something shiny...must go look. Note to Self: Normal is just a setting on washing machines I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going, and hook up with them later. The sooner you fall behind the more time you'll have to catch up. You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder! 'It's always in the last place you look' Well DUR! Because you stop looking after you find it! HELLO! If you have ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile. "Please Note: CHRISTMAS IS CANCELED Apparently you told Santa that you have been good this year...he died laughing." "God made man, and then he said, "I can do better than that," and made woman." - Adela Rodgers St. Johns To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research. If you can't fix it with duck tape you haven't used enough! I just joined the Light side! You wanna know why because, they have CUPCAKES! f you have the most RANDOM dreams, copy this. If you hear voices of the characters in your head...copy and paste this on your profile. If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile. 98 percent of authors confuse "you're" and "your". If YOU'RE one of the 2 percent who knows how to tell them apart, copy and paste this into YOUR profile. If you hate how ice cream trucks have the uncanny and irritating tendency to come by when you're writing in the summer, especially during unfitting moments such as tragic scenes or angst chapters, copy and paste this in your profile. If you have noticed the similarities, copy and paste this into your profile: McDonalds: Burger King, Subway: Quiznos, Disney: DreamWorks, Nestlé: Hershey, Kellogg’s: General Mills If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile (at least I THINK I'm not dead...) If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile. If you think everyone's out of their mind, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or the vice versa copy this into your profile. If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile. If you think that life without computers is useless then copy this to your profile. My best friend is insane, if you think your best friend is insane, put this in your profile. Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, put this in your profile. If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation, put it in your profile. If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile. If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile If you have ever walked into a wall, copy this onto your profile If you have ever fallen out of a chair backwards...copy/paste this into your profile. If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this on your profile. If you've ever sung a song you hated so much, copy and paste this into your profile If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile. If you're on the computer, paste this on your profile. If you’ve ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile If you get really good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile If you are in lala land most of the time copy this onto your profile. If you've ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever done homework, were reading a story on fanfiction, were writing a story for fanfiction, were talking to a friend, or were watching TV at the same time, copy and paste this into your profile. If you randomly check your email every five minutes while on the computer, copy this into your profile Then sometimes I lie awake at night and ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night." Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way you're a mile away from them and you have their shoes. Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up. Life isn't passing me by; it's trying to run me over. You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it. The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy. Smile... it makes people wonder what you're up to. I know Karate, Kung Fu, and 47 other dangerous words. Weird is good. Strange is bad. Odd is what you call someone who you can't decide what to call them. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, which means weird is good! If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile. If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this to your profile. If you've ever had an argument with yourself, copy this to your profile. ( I LOST!!) If you've ever had a conversation with yourself, copy this to your profile. If you've ever lost a bet to yourself, copy this to your profile. If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile. If you have ever wondered why the heck Canadians and Americans have to spell 'colour' differently, and use different units of measurement, copy this to your profile. If you have ever tripped on a person, copy this into your profile. (yep, and successfully knocked them down then I asked them why they were in my way. ) I'm the kind of girl who walks into a door and apologizes. I'm the kind of girl who would rather act stupid than smart. I'm the kind of girl who would burst out laughing in a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday. I'm the kind of girl who would get fired at the M&M's company for throwing out the W's. I'm the kind of girl who gets drunk off soda and loves every minute of it. You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then? I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my readymade fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you bunghole! (Yes I am the type of person that says bunghole!) We fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But us teenage girls our good at one thing: Staying Strong. I see Normal people! QUICK!! Take a picture!! What’s the relationship between UFO's and smart blondes? you hear about them all the time, yet have never seen one (Sooo not true. The second smartest person in my class (who is just barely behind me in the race) Is... You guessed it BLONDE!) Slinky + Escalator = Endless fun They say, "Guns don't kill people. People kill people." Well, I think the gun helps. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people. Since a running back runs forward, why is he called a running back? Why is it when we laugh in school the teachers say do you find something funny? When obviously we do This has got to be one of the cleverest DORMITORY: ASTRONOMER: DESPERATION: THE EYES: GEORGE BUSH: THE MORSE CODE : SLOT MACHINES: ELECTION - RESULTS: SNOOZE ALARMS: A DECIMAL POINT: THE EARTHQUAKES: ELEVEN PLUS TWO: If you think that Writer's Block sucks, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think that writing or reading Fanfic stories is fun and addicting, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you are addicted to Fanfiction, copy and paste this onto your profile. If boys at your school annoy you paste this onto your profile. If you wish that a fictional character was real, copy and paste this to your profile. Don't think of your self as an ugly person. Think of yourself as a beautiful monkey. A stranger stabs you in the front; a friend stabs you in the back; a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends only poke each other with straws. "We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police do." You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor. Music is like candy-you throw away the rappers. Life isn't a garden so stop being a hoe. If life gives you lemons, throw them back at the jerk who gave 'em to ya and demand chocolate. if you think some people must be on suger highs when they write their stories copy and paste this into your profile. Give a person a fish, you feed them for a day; Teach a person to use the Internet, they won't bother you for weeks. Some people are like a slinky..not really good for anything, but you can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target. If someone says there are a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if someone say that there is wet paint somewhere you have to touch it? Don't frown, even when you’re sad, someone could be falling in love with your smile. I'd rather be hated for who I am than be loved for who I'm not. Oops, I appear to have fallen on your lips. My heart is not a playground I'm not so good at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment? Dear Heart, I met a boy today, prepare to shatter. To a guy love is only a chapter but to a girl its her whole book. All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative. When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear. You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it. I hate it when people say: "When life give you lemons, make lemonade." Well, you know what, life never gave you water and sugar, so you can only make lemon juice. "Life is short" What? Name one thing you do that is longer than life. "Don't you wish you could have your cake and eat it too?" What is the point of having a cake if you can't eat it? "Lol(all the time)" If you laugh out loud that much, then you have issues. You go girl and don't come back! I had a dream and in it something eats you. It's not your fault but I'm blaming you anyway. I'm cute your not seems so unfair. Does it hurt being so dumb? It's sad your own Mom dresses you liket that. Life. Get one. It's not my fault your icky. But I'm only mean to people who tell me to be nice. Like I need your approval. Ways to annoy people at the cinema: Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!" Go, "Oooooh..." whenever anyone kisses. Clap when the good guy gets killed. During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?" Whenever the bad guy is doing something devious, say, "Watch out!" Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes. Tell the man selling popcorn that the bathroom is flooding. Yell out what is going to happen. Wear a cape and when it's your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman! Hahaha!" and run away. Say that they cannot sit next to you because you invisible friend already is. Dress for every movie as if it were the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Use empty chairs next to you as catapults with candy. Aim at specific people behind you and see if you can hit anyone in the back row. Wear 3D glasses. Complain loudly how bad the effects are. Bring a flashlight. In the middle of the film do shadow puppets on the ceiling. Bring a remote control. Complain that you can't change the channel. Sit in the front row, the minute the movie starts run out screaming. Every time a character's name is mentioned do the Richmeister. (for a guy named Nick say, the Nickmeister, the Nickenator, Nickarino...) Bring a beach ball. Toss it around. Try to start a wave. Become a bookie. Take bets on who will die first. Sit in the back and throw eggs at the projection window. Every time someone curses cover your ears and scream, "No profanity!" Sing with the theme music. Bring and use your own air freshener. At the ticket booth, request tickets for really old movies, "I'll have two tickets for the Goonies." Throw spit wads on the screen. Try throwing them on the upper part of the screen so they can't get scraped off. Pass around a collection plate and see if anyone contributes. Point a laser pointer at the screen. Give the audience a laser light show. Bring a book and a bright light. Start reading the book with the light on. When someone asks you to turn out the light, yell, "Shh, I'm trying to read!" Use binoculars. Stare at the audience rather than the movie. Bring a Nintendo laser gun. Shoot at the screen. Clap loudly every time a person walks into the theater late. When someone kicks the back of your chair, scream, "Ahhh, whiplash!" Ask what the theater's return policy on popcorn is. Ask the person at the ticket window, "Do you work here?" Start a standing ovation at the end of the movie. Quote all dialogue 4 seconds after it is said on the screen. Get up frequently and leave the room while singing "Let's all go to the Lobby to get ourselves a treat" Every time there is a gun shot scream, "Hit the floor!", jump on the floor, and cover your head. Wear one of those "cat in the hat" top hats. Play musical chairs, getting up frequently and moving right next to someone sitting by themself. Bring your own beanbag chair and sit in the aisle. Before the movie begins, tape fart cusions to various chairs in the theater room. Bring a portable air popper, pop your own popcorn. Bring a watergun and shoot it at anyone who begins talking then say very loudly, "SHH!" Before the commercials start and people are just coming in and shout so that people outside can hear, "I'M SO VERY SORRY! YOU'RE TOO LATE!" Tie a cardboard box around your waist and walk up and down the aisles shouting "Get your popcorn, peanuts!" Cough really loudly right at the most important part of the movie, so nobody can hear it, like when the killer's name is going to be said. Laugh hysterically during the sad parts in the movie, cry during the funny ones. Bring a pager or cellphone and set them off every 5 minutes, you can also set off a watch alarm if you have a loud one. Say "Shhhhh" every 5 minutes. Pass by a room that's showing a movie you've already seen, put your head into the room, and scream the end. You Know You Live In 2008 When You... 1. You accidentally enter your password on a microwave. Did you know: Kissing is healthy. Bananas are good for period pain. It's good to cry. Chicken soup actually makes you feel better. 94 percent of boys would love it if you sent them flowers. Lying is actually unhealthy. You really only need to apply mascara to your top lashes. It's actually true, boys DO insult you when they like you. 89 percent of guys want YOU to make the first move. It's impossible to apply mascara with your mouth closed. Chocolate will make you feel better. Most boys think it's cute when you say the wrong thing. A good friend never judges. A good foundation will hide all hickeys... not that you have any. Boys aren't worth your tears. We all love surprises. Now... make a wish. Wish REALLY hard!! WISH WISH WISH WISH Your wish has just been recieved. Copy and Paste this into your profile in the next 15 minutes and... Your wish will be granted. 1) 4 invites 3 and 8 to dinner at their house. What happens? 3 constantly cleans everything and 8 insists on cooking a ton of food 4 keeps disapearing. 2) 9 tries to get 5 to go to a yoga class. What happens? 5 hexes 9 into oblivion because he is an idiot for trying that even if she does need it. 3) You need to stay at a friend’s house for the night. Do you choose 1 or 6? Well both are fighters and awesome hard choice but 1…she is CIA what can I say 4) 2 and 7 are making out. 1 walks in...Their reaction? In my mind 1 is 2s mother so she would be like wait until your father gets home and we will talk, I am okay with this but we still need to talk. 5) 3 falls in love with 6. 8 is jealous. What happens? Kind of creepy since 3,6, and 8 are all females. 6) 4 mugs you in a dark alleyway. Who comes to your rescue? 10, 2 or 7? 10 would help 4, as would 2 since in my mind they are cousins…so I would go with 7 since she is not related to 4 in any way. 7) 1 decides to start a cooking show. 15 minutes later what is happening? The cooking area is burning down since 1 can not cook to save her life. 9) 3 has to marry either 8, 4 or 9. Who do they chose? Most likely 9 since he is the only guy in the choices. 10) 7 kidnaps 2 and demands something from 5 for 2's release. What is it? Make her the top of her Transfigurations class if she is not already. 11) You get to meet either 1 or 6. Who do you chose? Again hard to choose but 1 since I like spy type stuff 12) 10 challenges 4 to a chariot race. Why? To prove he is better than 4 since he is always trying to prove that. 13) Everyone gangs up on 3. What happens? She starts crying and cleaning. Then after a while she yells. 14) Everyone is invited to 2 and 10 wedding except for 8. How do they react? Does not care since they do not know each other. 15) Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a witch and 6 is not 16) 10 gathers everyone around to tell them a fairy tale. How does it go? Oddly since 10 is not the type to tell fairy tales. this is the sadest and sweetest thing ever: I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a Cashier hand this little boy some money back. The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old. The Cashier said, 'I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll.' Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?'' The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.'' Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly. The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand. Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to. 'It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her.' I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her after all, and not to worry. But he replied to me sadly. 'No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there.' His eyes were so sad while saying this. 'My Sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.'' My heart nearly stopped. The little boy looked up at me and said: 'I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall.' Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me 'I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't forget me.' 'I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister.' Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly. I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. 'Suppose we check Again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?'' 'OK' he said, 'I hope I do have enough.' I added some of my money to his with out him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for the doll and even some spare money. The little boy said: 'Thank you God for giving me enough money!' Then he looked at me and added, 'I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that mommy could give It to my sister. He heard me!'' 'I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.'' 'My mommy loves white roses.' A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket. I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind. Then I remembered a local news paper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl. The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy? Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the news paper that the young woman had passed away. I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial. She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest. I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed for ever. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him. repost or don't your choise but if it touched your heart i suggest you do. it made my cousin cry when she read over my shoulde(i hate it when people do that) i havent cried for 4 years! so i didnt cry but it still touched me. i guess i built an emotional wall nothing gets to me anymore. at least not that i show on the outside. just coz i had to learn to be tough and stick up for myself doesnt mean i dont have a heart. Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES! If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile paste this in your profile If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile. My best friend is insane. If you agree, or if you have an insane friend, copy this into your profile! If you think those kids should just give the Rabbit his cereal put this in your profile! If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile. If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile. If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile. 98 of the internet population has a Myspace. If you're part of the 2 that can resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile. 92 percent of the teenage population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said that it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. put this in your profile if you're part of the 8 percent that would be laughing Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, then weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile! In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile. If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile If you ask me to list my three all time faviorite books, I'd give you at least forty. I love music, I like almost at least one song from every kind of music. I'ma crazy, random, nice, mean, sweet, caring, anoying, and funny person (theres probaly others... but yeah.) Somethings that make me smile, 1. Anything funny, 2. My faviorite stories being updated, 3. Being me, 4. Heres a few others, FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?" FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you. BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..." FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall. BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?" FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince. BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you. FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying. BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!" FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda. BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you. FRIENDS:Will sit at the side of the pool withyou at that time of the month. BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in. FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain. BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!" FRIENDS:Will help you move. BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies. FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!" FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink. BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food. FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa. BEST FRIENDS:Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS! FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail. BEST FRIENDS:Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we messed up! FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry. BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore. FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number. BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial. FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back. BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue." FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you. BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story... FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door. BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME. FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone. BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell. FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies) BEST FRIENDS: Are for life. FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough. BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste! FRIENDS: Would read ignore this. BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this shit! I’ve built a wall not to block anyone out but to see who loves me enough to climb over. You know what makes letting go of a crush so hard? The fear that the moment you let go, they'll catch on. I'm right! You're wrong! Any questions? "It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 muscles to smile, but only 4 muscles to reach out and slap someone." Bite me and I'll bite back. You see that girl over there? That's my best friend, YOU break her heart... I break your face! You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it. Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't a good evening. I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it! Never knock on Death’s door, ring the doorbell and run away, he hates that . One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions. Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door . Silence is so freakin loud! You say I've lost my sanity. But you can't lose what you never had . A good friend will comfort you when you're boyfriend breaks up with you...but a best friend will go up to him and ask "It's because you're gay isn't it?" When life gives you lemons, scream at life- I mean, seriously, what good is lemons without the sugar? I can't make lemonade without sugar, can I? One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject. 92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breath. I'd be part of the 8 percent laughing their ass off. When she starts cursing at you tryin to act all tuff , Kiss her and tell her you love her When she steals your favorite hat, Let her keep it and sleep with it for a night When she says that she likes you, SHE REALLY DOES MORE THAN YOU COULD UNDERSTAND! When she grabs at your hands, Hold her's and play with her fingers Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her you love her Stay up all night with her when she's sick. Watch her favorite movie with her or her favorite show even if you think it's stupid. Let her wear your clothes. When she's bored and sad, hang out with her. Kiss her in the pouring rain. Guy: My phone seems to be broken. Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk bye again? there's always a little truth behind "just kididng", a little knowledge behind "I dont know" a little emotion behind "I dont care" and a little pain behind "It's okay" When a boy is not arguing ... he is thinking deeply. When a boy says ' I love you ' ... he means it. Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?" Woman: "It's in the phone book." Man: "But I don't know your name." Woman: "That's in the phone book too." Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore. Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down. Man: Your place or mine? Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine. If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em. If ya can't join 'em, bribe 'em. If ya can't bribe 'em, blackmail 'em. If ya can't blackmail 'em, kill 'em. If ya can't kill 'em, you're screwed. Reality is for people who lack imagination. Taste the rainbow - Eat CRAYONS! When she start's cussing at you, Kiss her and tell her you love her I WANT A GUY... who would move the hair away from my eyes and then kiss me, hold my hand in line at the mall and make all the girls jealous. Someone who would sing showtunes to me at random moments. Who would let me sleep on his chest. A BOY who would get mad at someone if they called me UGLY or were mean to me. I want someone who would call me 3 times a day if he went away. He would always admit that I'm right Someone who would let me gossip to him and just smile and agree with everything I said. Someone who would make fun of me just to make me laugh. He would take me to the park and put his hands around my waist and give me big bearhugs all the time. He would tell all his friends about me and SMILE when he did. He would never be afraid to say "I love you" in front of his friends, and we'd argue about silly things and then make up. I want a boy who would kiss me at midnight on New Years and COUNT STARS with me. Who would put his arm around me the minute we sat down next to each other. Who would stay home with me on a Friday night, just to help me make dinner and watch movies together under the same blanket. He wouldn't be afraid to KISS ME, no matter where we are. Someone who would tell me I'm beauiful but not too often, who would make me laugh like NO ONE else could. A guy who would QUOTE SHAKESPEARE just to tell me that I'm BEAUTIFUL in HIS eyes Recite lines from THE PRINCESS BRIDE, then kiss me. But mostly, I want someone who would be my best friend and would never BREAK MY HEART 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE 2. My mother taught me RELIGION 3. My mother taught me TIME TRAVEL 4. My mother taught me LOGIC 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT 7. My mother taught me IRONY 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS 9. My mother taught me CONTORTIONISM 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA 11. My mother taught me WEATHER 12. My mother taught me HYPOCRISY 13. My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE 14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION 15. My mother taught me: ENVY 16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION 17. My mother taught me: RECEIVING 18. My mother taught me: MEDICAL SCIENCE 19. My mother taught me: ESP 20. My mother taught me: HUMOR 21. My mother taught me: HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT 22.My Mother taught me: Genetics 23. My Mother taught me about my Roots 24. My Mother taught me Wisdom 25. My mother taught me about Justice Beginnings are scary. Endings are usually sad, but it's the middle that counts the most. At some point I'll finally tell you that i miss you. Cheers...to another awkward moment! I run with scissors it makes me feel dangerous ;)... Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience. Real friends don't let you do stupid things... alone. If you can’t live without me, Why aren’t you dead yet? Love your enemies. It'll make 'em crazy. Silence is golden but duck tape is silver. If aliens are looking for intelligent life WHY ARE YOU SCARED?! Practice makes perfect...but some say nobody is perfect so why practice I am a bomb technician... if you see me running try to keep up When life give you lemons, keep them, because hey, free lemons. Some people are like a slinky, not really good for anything but you can't help smiling when one tumbles down the stairs Few girls admit their age. Few guys act theirs. Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you a good friend will always bail you out of jail. a true friend is standing next to you Kids are the future. Be afraid. Be very afraid. Things you think people would know. On a Myer hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping". (Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair). On a bag of Chips: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special?) On a bar of Palmolive soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap". (And that would be how?) On some frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost". (But, it's just a suggestion). On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down". (Well...duh, a bit late, huh)! On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating". (And you thought?...) On packaging for a K-Mart iron: "Do not iron clothes on body". (But wouldn't this save me more time?) On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication". (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year olds with head colds off those forklifts.) On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness". (And...I'm taking this because?) On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only". (As opposed to...what? on the moon?) On a Japanese food processor:"Not to be used for the other use". (Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.) On Nobby's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts". (Talk about a news flash!) On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts". (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?) On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly". If you can’t convince them, confuse them. A synonym is a word you use when you can’t spell the word you first thought of The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on Have you ever noticed that if you rearrange the letters in Mother-In-law it spells "Woman Hitler?" Dinosaurs extinction wasn’t an accident, Barney came along and the all committed suicide A stranger stabs you in the front, a friend stabs you in the back, and a boy stabs you in the heart, but a best friend just sits there poking you with a spork The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list. If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong I didn’t say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you 'The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so she can tell when she's really in trouble. Good girls are bad girls that never get caught I don't have an attitude; I have a personality you can't handle. Before Mount Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain on Earth? Can a man legally marry his widow's sister in the state of California? Clara Clatter was born on December 27th, yet her birthday is always in the summer. How is this possible? He has married many women, but has never been married. Who is he? How many of each animal did Moses take on the ark? How many times can you subtract the number 5 from 25? How much dirt is in a hole 4 feet deep and 2 feet wide? I know a word of letters three, add two and fewer there will be. If a rooster laid a brown egg and a white egg, what kind of chicks would hatch? If two's company and three's a crowd, what are four and five? If you were in a dark room with a candle, a woodstove, a match and a gas lamp which do you light first? If you were standing directly on Antarcticas South Pole facing north, which direction would you travel if you took one step backward? Is an old hundred dollar bill better than a new one? No sooner spoken than broken. What is it? Some months have 30 days, some months have 31 days; how many have 28? Take off my skin -- I won't cry, but you will! What am I? The more it dries, the wetter it gets. What is it? The more you take, the more you leave behind. What are they? There is a clerk at the butcher shop, he is five feet ten inches tall, and he wears size 13 sneakers. He has a wife and 2 kids. What does he weigh? What can burn the eyes, sting the mouth, yet be consumed? What can go up a chimney down but can't go down a chimney up? What can go up and come down without moving? What can pass before the sun without making a shadow? What can you catch but not throw? What crime is punishable if attempted, but is not punishable if committed? What do the numbers 11, 69, and 88 all have in common? What do you serve that you can't eat? What do you throw out when you want to use it, but take in when you don't want to use it? What goes up white and comes down yellow? What grows up while growing down? What one word has the most letters in it? What starts with a T, ends with a T, and has T in it? What travels around the world yet stays in one corner? What two words contain the most letters? What's the difference between here and there? Which is correct to say, "The yolk of the egg are white," or "The yolk of the egg is white?" Which moves faster: heat or cold? You answer me, although I never ask you questions. What am I? You can't keep this until you have given it. There is $21.00 in 1 dollar bills that has to be split evenly among the 2 fathers and 2 sons. How is this possible? A Man walked up to his house and he heard his wife scream " John Don't do it!" and the man ran inside and saw his wife, dead on the floor. Around her was a Baker, Milkman, and a Doctor. The man goes up to the Milkman and says "U did It!". How did the man know he did it? What do you call a country, where all the cars in it are pink? There is an ancient invention still used in some parts of the world today that allows people to see through walls. What is it? What question can someone ask all day long, always get completely different answers, and yet all the answers could be correct? In a certain city, 5% of all the persons in town have unlisted phone numbers. If you select 100 names at random from that city's phone directory, how many people selected will have unlisted phone numbers? There is a horse tied to a rope. The rope is 10 feet long. There is a bale of hay 23 feet in front of the horse. The horse is able to eat the hay, yet does not break the rope. How is that possible? After a man had been blindfolded, someone hung up his hat. The man walked 100 yards, turned around, and shot a bullet through his hat. How is such a feat possible? At a posh restaurant I was having dinner with a noted historian. We were discussing the relative merits of Woodrow Wilson, when my friend turned to me and said, "I'll tell you all you need to know about the character of Woodrow Wilson. Why when he ran for president, his own mother didn't even vote for him!" How is it possible to shave three times a day and still grow a beard? A man fell off a 20-foot ladder and landed on the sidewalk, but he did not get hurt. Why not? Why are 1980 pennies worth almost $20? Which is correct: 18 plus 19 is 36. Or 18 plus 19 are 36? Is it physically possible for you to stand behind your mother, and for your mother to stand behind you at the same time? In a marathon race what does the winning runner lose? Why didn't Beethoven finish the Unfinished Symphony? What has holes but holds water? David's father has three sons : Snap, Crackle and _ ? What is harder to catch the faster you run? What is the beginning of eternity, the end of time, and the beginning of every ending? What do some men have they don't want, but would not part it for a million dollars? A hundred feet in the air, but it's back is on the ground. A father's child, a mother's child, yet no one's son. Forward I am heavy, but backward I am not. What do you fill with empty hands? What has a foot on each side and one in the middle? What kind of coat can be put on only when wet? What object has keys that open no locks, space but no room, and you can enter but not go in Mary left on a horse on Sunday, was gone for four days, and came back on Sunday. What is once in a minute, twice in a moment, and never in a thousand years? What gets larger as you take more from it? What questions can you never ever answer with a "yes"? If a train was on its way to Florida and it tipped over, If you are in a one story house that is all blue, what color are the stairs? If you are in a room with no doors or no windows The maker doesn't want it. Four men sat down to play, In a tunnel of darkness lies a beast of iron. It can only attack when pulled back. What can be swallowed, but can also swallow you? What's better than the best thing and worse than the worst thing? What two things can you never eat for breakfast? Why is it so easy to weigh fish? What kind of nut has no shell? A girl named Julie threw a ball. Pretend you're a bus driver. You start at New York and fifty people get on. There was a pond. While on my way to St. Ives Q: If a plane crashed on the border of England and Scotland, where would they bury the survivors? Q: If the red house is on the right side and if the blue house is on the left side where's the white house? Your Guy Side: You love hoodies. Total= 18 YOUR GIRL SIDE: You wear lip gloss/chapstick. You hate wearing the color black You like hanging out at the mall. you like make-up (heavy dark eye make-up) Total= 6 For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are and add a stereotype to the list.)italics, bold and underlined - personal comment The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'mBLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... Post this on your profile if you hate racism! YOU KNOW YOU'RE OBSESSED WITH PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS WHEN: 1) You buy everything you see with an owl or trident on it. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxPercabeth~4evaxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx You Know You’re Obsessed With Percy Jackson When… You go to the Empire State Building and you ask for the 600th Floor. (He laughed at me!! So rude!!) There’s a thunderstorm going on and you scream, “CALM DOWN, ZEUS!” Every time you use the Internet, you thank Hermes. When you see Harry Potter, you think of Percy with glasses. You burn food to see if it smells good. You see an owl, you go, “Hi Athena!” You’re in a running/swimming race and you’re praying and sacrificing to Hermes/Poseidon. You think that your favorite singer is a child of Apollo. Someone close to you dies and you give them money (LOTS of it) just in case… Everyone else is creating a Twilight family and you create a PJO family. You go on a cruise and you hope the boat isn’t The Princess Andromeda… You’re on a boat and you pray that Poseidon is in a good mood. You’re in the air (hang-gliding, cliff-diving, bungee jumping, flying, in a plane, etc.) and you hope Zeus is in a good mood and won’t blast you out of the air. You go to Aunty Em’s and say you’re camera shy. You find your true love and thank Aphrodite for sending him/her to you. You know Muse is the best singers. Get it, the Nine Muses?? Bring a blue plastic hairbrush with you everywhere. When it gets really cold randomly, blame Kronos. You get a Greek mythology calendar for Christmas (so sad and true). You get really mad at Hades when a family member dies. You sometimes try to control water. You don't read anything but PJO for the majority of your middle school life. You've gone to Google maps and looked up Camp Half-Blood’s address. Even though not diagnosed, you claim you have ADHD or dyslexia and blame it You yell "Annabeth!" everytime you see a NY Yankees hat. You make the PJO characters on Sims, as Miis on the Wii, and other video Anytime you see an orange shirt, you look at the front of it to see if it is You are a PJO character for Halloween. Recite lines randomly from the books. When you see/hear about anything myhtology-related, you talk about how it Buy anything New York or San Francisco-related. You are suddenly obsessed with Adidas shoes because they have the Hermes You claim that Percy IS real and lives in New York no matter how much your friends argue with you. You have dreams about PJO characters/events (That has happened to me You carry a ballpoint pen in your pocket. That everytime you pick up a pen, you think it'll turn into a sword. Everytime you play dodgeball, you bring a suit of armor. You go to San Fransisco looking for the Old Sea Man. You find yourself praying to Poseidon for rain. Whenever your internet slows down, you yell at the sky and say "HERMES! WHY You stuff your (ahem) Harry Potter books in the back of your closet so you When someone gets married, you say: "I hope you shall not anger Hera" In the beginning of your first History class, you burst out "Will we be You pretend (or actually) faint when someone asks "Who's Percy?" When someone mentions the name Percy (like Percy Weasley) you scream When someone dies, you pray to Hades to allow them to go across Styx for You are known to scream names of the characters at random times.(Not me.) You've got any copy of any book in all your backpacks/binders incase of You pray to Athena when you don’t study for a math test. And when you flunk said test, you blame her irritation on Percabeth. You pray to Athena when you don’t study for a math test. And when you flunk said test, you blame her irritation on Percabeth. You make a list of characters never to anger, like this one and why: When you steal your friend's pen you believe it's justified because your dad is the god of thieves, and you thought it was Riptide and had to check to make sure Percy was still alive. You write fanfiction constantly, even when you're not at your computer. When your mom grounds you from the computer, you blame it on a combination of Nemesis, Hera and Hermes' little joke. You want Hephaestus to fix your iPod when it breaks. You give all your siblings god parents (Poseidon, Zeus, Hades.) You quiz fellow fans on the minor gods and win. You spend time doing pointless research at , just because Rick Riordan linked it on his site. You plan several statements to avoid Apollo's lines and remember he's a player, should he ever hit on you, and several ways to get out of being cursed. You imagine the gods alone, and what they really do on the Superbowl. You think Percy's extended family needs extensive therapy. You want Kronos buried under Witchita, Kansas in a safe deposit toothpick box. No one will ever look there, and hopefully he'll be too tiny to bother the locals. Your mother thinks you need to get a boyfriend, as does your father to cure your obsession. You blame your little brother's desire to turn off your Internet in the middle of this review on Hermes' anger that you've joked about all of them. You imagine random unwritten PJO moments during class and laugh. When one brave soul unaware of your obsession broaches the question of why you were laughing, you try to explain. They think you are nuts because you are laughing at Hades' wild card of Nico. You think of creative names for Percy besides Seaweed Brain, such as kelphead16 because his head is full of kelp and there's an 85 chance he'll die at the age of sixteen. You think of creative names for Zeus such as GreeceLightning! Get it?!? Greece-Grease? You wonder if you'll be able to drive a car come your 16, provided Percy saves the world, because of that. You know you're obsessed when you lose something, and say, "Come on Hermes! You think all the popular girls at your school are children of Aphrodite. And say to all the braniacs at your school if Athena is okay. (Don’t hurt me Athena). You go on YouTube and look at PJO themes for characters. You read page 287 of BotL over and over again or say the lines in your head You and your other PJO obsessed friend cracks up if any one mentions the word You and your PJO obsessed friend start a fan club with only you two in it. You get other people obsessed. You have constant vivid dreams about the fifth book. You spend most of your time thinking what will happen in the fifth book. You jump up and down at the idea of LT becoming a movie. You know exactly what someone means when they say LT, SoM, TC, BotL, TLO, PJO and Your favorite quote of all time comes from PJO. You and your friend has "diss-wars" using PJO CHARACTERS (My friend Athena is When someone dies, you give them a sack of red rubber balls for Cerberus. Every time you see a guy in a wheelchair you think "Chiron!!” You find yourself saying things like "Oh my gods!" and "What the Hades?" When your boyfriend dumps you, you take the oath of the hunters (not that I When you burn yourself, you curse Hephaestus/Hestia. ~You put an offering to Demeter next to your garden. ~You go up to a teacher in a wheelchair and say, "I know who you really are, Chiron…" Ten Signs of Obsession with a Book (Series) or Movie 10. You are constantly thinking about it. 9. You have at least a billion characterizations and opinions about it and want to discuss it 24/7. 8.You are thinking of parodies for it and posting them in fanfiction.net. 7.You have a billion questions you want to ask the author (e.g. Does Annabeth have a bellybutton? How does Edward react when he hears sixties' music?). 6. Your friends and immediate family notice that this book (series) or movie is all you ever talk about. 5. You daydream about it when you are bored. 4.You are constantly thinking of sequels or prequels and putting them on fanfiction.net. 3. When you doodle, it happens to be one or more characters or a symbol in the book (series) or movie. 2.You reread/rewatch the book (series) or movie on a daily basis. 1. You think about it every night before you go to sleep. some of my favorite 'copy and paste this onto your profile if...' You cried when you finished TLO You've read every book in the PJO series at least 5 times You eat, sleep, and breath Percabeth Every school notebook you own has PJO stuff scribbled on each page You're in love with a fictional character (PERCY JACKSON) You've been caught for reading in class for multiple times You and your BFF call yourselves geeks because you sit around and talk about PJO You own homemade replicas of things from the PJO series You dream of going to Camp Half-Blood Ways to Annoy people at the cinema: Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!" Go, "Oooooh..." whenever anyone kisses. Clap when the good guy gets killed. During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?" Whenever the bad guy is doing something devious, say, "Watch out!" Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes. Tell the man selling popcorn that the bathroom is flooding. Yell out what is going to happen. Wear a cape and when its your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman! Hahaha!" and run away. Say that they cannot sit next to you because you invisible friend already is. Dress for every movie as if it were the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Use empty chairs next to you as catapults with candy. Aim at specific people behind you and see if you can hit anyone in the back row. Wear 3D glasses. Complain loudly how bad the effects are. Bring a flashlight. In the middle of the film do shadow puppets on the ceiling. Bring a remote control. Complain that you can't change the channel. Sit front row, the minute the movie starts run out screaming. Every time a character's name is mentioned do the Richmeister. (for a guy named Nick say, the Nickmeister, the Nickenator, Nickarino...) Bring a beach ball. Toss it around. Try to start a wave. Become a bookie. Take bets on who will die first. Sit in the back and throw eggs at the projection window. Every time someone curses cover your ears and scream, "No profanity!" Sing with the theme music. Bring and use your own air freshener. At the ticket booth, request tickets for really old movies, "I'll have two tickets for the Goonies." Throw spit wads on the screen. Try throwing them on the upper part of the screen so they can't get scraped off. Pass around a collection plate and see if anyone contributes. Point a laser pointer at the screen. Give the audience a laser light show. Bring a book and a bright light. Start reading the book with the light on. When someone asks you to turn out the light, yell, "Shh, I'm trying to read!" Use binoculars. Stare at the audience rather than the movie. Bring a Nintendo laser gun. Shoot at the screen. Clap loudly every time a person walks into the theater late. When someone kicks the back of your chair, scream, "Ahhh, whiplash!" Ask what the theater's return policy on popcorn is. Ask the person at the ticket window, "Do you work here?" Start a standing ovation at the end of the movie. Quote all dialogue 4 seconds after it is said on the screen. Get up frequently and leave the room while singing "Let's all go to the Lobby to get ourselves a treat" Every time there is a gun shot scream, "Hit the floor!", jump on the floor, and cover your head. Wear one of those "cat in the hat" top hats. Play musical chairs, getting up frequently and moving right next to someone sitting by themself. Bring your own beanbag chair and sit in the aisle. Before the movie begins, tape fart cusions to various chairs in the theater room. Bring a portable air popper, pop your own popcorn. Bring a watergun and shoot it at anyone who begins talking then say very loudly, "SHH!" Before the commercials start and people are just coming in and shout so that people outside can hear, "I'M SO VERY SORRY! YOU'RE TOO LATE!" Tie a cardboard box around your waist and walk up and down the aisles shouting "Get your popcorn, peanuts!" Cough really loudly right at the most important part of the movie, so nobody can here it, like when the killer's name is going to be said. Laugh hysterically during the sad parts in the movie, cry during the funny ones. Bring a pager or cellphone and set them off every 5 minutes, you can also set off a watch alarm if you have a loud one. Say "Shhhhh" every 5 minutes. Pass by a room that's showing a movie you've already seen, put your head into the room, and scream the end. The Difference Between PJO FANS and NORMAL PEOPLE NORMAL PEOPLE: say OMG! NORMAL PEOPLE: go to a psychiatrist to tell their feelings NORMAL PEOPLE: say shut up or i'll tell on you! (HAHAHAHAHHAHAAHHA) NORMAL PEOPLE: think that PJO fans are stupid PJO FANS: know that normal people are stupid (yup like, TOTALLY) NORMAL PEOPLE: when being chased yell HELP ME SOMEBODY! PJO FANS: when being chased use their awesome demigod powers (AWESOME) NORMAL PEOPLE: get nervous/scared during thunderstorms PJO FANS: yell at Zeus to calm down (uh huh) NORMAL PEOPLE: would choose somewhere sunny to go for vacation PJO FANS: would try and find Camp Half Blood (you know, I've thought 'bout doing that. go on google and search delphi strawberry service. actually, I'll do that right now) NORMAL PEOPLE:don't have this on their profile PJO FANS: MUST have this on their profile! (yyyyyyaaaaayyyy PJO ROCKS) How to Tell if You're a Writer -If you talk to yourself. you know you are obsessed with Greek mythology and PJ when:
2. if you curse you say Gods not God (defo) 3. you correct people outloud or under your breath if they use the singular form of Gods. (yep) 4. you read the entire series in a week or less (i took 1 day!!) 5. you study your eyes, ersonality trates and skills and try to figure out if you could possibly be a demigod and who would be your godly parent. (Athena, Poseidon or Zeus) 6. you can name at the least the council of Gods at mt olympus. (yepidoo) 7.if someone pronounces something wrong you correct them 8. you know the myth and if someone gets something worn or misses detaild you interupt (always) 9. you believe the myths 10. you wish you could go to camp half blood and train 10. you actualy WANT AND WISH YOU HAD ADHD AND DISLEXIA 11. you wish they taught greek at your school and if they did you would study hard and be top of the class.(normaly i never revise but yes if they taught greek i would 12. they dont each greek at your school so you try to teach yourself ( I started with the alphabet) Daddy's poem Her hair was up in a pony tail, her favorite dress tied with a bow. Today was Daddy's Day at school, and she couldn't wait to go. But her mommy tried to tell her, that she probably should stay home. Why the kids might not understand, if she went to school alone. But she was not afraid; she knew just what to say. What to tell her classmates of why he wasn't there today. But still her mother worried, for her to face this day alone. And that was why once again, she tried to keep her daughter home. But the little girl went to school, eager to tell them all. About a dad she never sees, a dad who never calls. There were daddies along the wall in back, for everyone to meet. Children were squirming impatiently, anxious in their seats. One by one the teacher called, a student from the class, to introduce their daddy. As seconds slowly passed, at last the teacher called her name, every child turned to stare. Each of them was searching, for a man who wasn't there. "Where's her daddy at?" she heard a boy call out. "She probably doesn't have one," another student dared to shout. And from somewhere near the back, she heard a daddy say, "Looks like another deadbeat dad, too busy to waste his day. "The words did not offend her, as she smiled up at her Mom. And looked back at her teacher, who told her to go on. And with hands behind her back, slowly she began to speak. And out from the mouth of a child, came words incredibly unique. "My Daddy couldn't be here, because he lives so far away. But I know he wishes he could be, since this is such a special day. And though you cannot meet him, I wanted you to know. All about my daddy, and how much he loves me so. He loved to tell me stories he taught me to ride my bike. He surprised me with pink roses, and taught me to fly a kite. We used to share fudge sundaes, and ice cream in a cone. And though you cannot see him, I'm not standing here alone. "Cause my daddy's always with me, even though we are apart. I know because he told me, he'll forever be in my heart. " With that, her little hand reached up, and lay across her chest. Feeling her own heartbeat, beneath her favorite dress. And from somewhere in the crowd of dads, her mother stood in tears. Proudly watching her daughter, who was wise beyond her years. For she stood up for the love of a man not in her life. Doing what was best for her, doing what was right. And when she dropped her hand back down, staring straight into the crowd, she finished with a voice so soft, but its message clear and loud. "I love my daddy very much, he's my shining star. And if he could, he'd be here, but heaven's just too far! You see he was a fireman and died just this past year when airplanes hit the towers and taught Americans to fear. "But sometimes when I close my eyes, it's like he never went away." And then she closed her eyes, and saw him there that day. And to her mother's amazement, she witnessed with surprise, a room full of daddies and children, all starting to close their eyes. Who knows what they saw before them, who knows what they felt inside. Perhaps for merely a second, they saw him at her side. "I know you're with me Daddy," to the silence she called out. And what happened next made believers, of those once filled with doubt. Not one in that room could explain it, for each of their eyes had been closed. But there on the desk beside her, was a fragrant long-stemmed pink rose. And a child was blessed, if only for a moment, by the love of her shining bright star. And given the gift of believing, that heaven is never too far. They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but then an entire life to forget them.. |
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