I was a Norwegian sailor - and now, exiled from my home land, I wander the seas, barefoot, reliving the glory days of the Pirates, plundering wealthy yachts and pleasure cruises. Banished for the slaughter of an entire herd of raindeer, I was cast out from my home and left to fend for myself with nothing but a Walkman and a cart of eggs. I kidnapped a Jewish banker and made him my first mate, liberated an entire factory of child laborers and signed them on as my loyal crew. Hmm...must have been high the day I wrote this? Or it's just the Vicodin kicking in. Oh well. Private, United States Marine Corps |
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