Update: Just read the whole dialogue section below and you'll figure everything out. It's a bit complicated, but I'm not a simple girl (coughcough).

About Me:

I am a innocent, little girl who loves picking daisies, looking at rainbows, and eating lollipops... And I also happen to have an evil, phsycotic little plan to take over the world, mind control all the people and make them dance the Chicken Dance until they all go INSANE!! Then I shall mutate a giant chicken, a hippopotamus, a monkey, and a hedgehog and create the world's most terrifying monster: THE DREADED HIPPOMONKENCHICKHOGMUS!! Using it I shall capture the Sun's energy and use it to DESTROY the world!! MWAHAHAHA... HAHA... haha... haha... hmm... You won't tell anyone, will you?

Nationality: Alienese

Hobbies: Annoying people like YOU!! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Gender: Monkey!! (Incase you can't tell, I am OBSESSED with monkeys.)

Age: 435,677,762,993,774- But I look younger!! winkwink

Wizard: So, Princess, do you ever plan on telling them?

Princess: Yeah... I guess I should start talking now.

Wizard: I'm Princess's alternate ego, the Wizard of Chocolate.

Princess: But, you can call her Wizard. She's like my twin.

Wizard: I LIKE PIE!!

Princess: Example A. Either way, we have important news to tell you, so we must stop dawdling.

Wizard: -looking at flowers- Dawdling? Who's dawdling? I like morning glories, but...

Princess: -rolls eyes- So, I just got back from a month and a half long vacation.

Wizard: And WE weren't aloud to use computers for updating stories.

Princess: Yeah, she came too. We were both hyperventilating when we found out we couldn't update Challenged Pride.

Wizard: DON'T KILL US! Please! We'll do anything!

Princess: -falls to her knees- ANYTHING!! Holy Macaroni and Cheese please leave us be!

Random Innocent Pedestrian: -gives Princess and Wizard weird looks- Uh...

Wizard: And, please, what ever you do, DON'T EAT ME!!

Princess: -pleading- Please, we'll update Challenged Pride if you promise not to eat us!

RIP (haha, isn't that funny?): -backing away slowly- Uh... What... What the hell? Who are you?

Princess: -standing up, forgetting the groveling- I am the Princess of Chocolate! This is my alternate ego, Wizard of Chocolate!

Wizard: -stands up and bows- Thank you, thank you very much.

Both: -back down on their knees in a flash- But... PLEASE! DON'T EAT US!

RIP: ... -looks confused- S-s-ure. I won't... eat you. Just update your whatever.

Princess: Okay, THANK YOU. We shan't forget this!

Challenged Pride: So, lots of authors have summaries of their stories on their profiles, and I think I should put one up too. Only because I'm too lazy to actually go and write up the next chapter. But it's coming soon! I promise! Don't eat me!

Alright, Challenged Pride is a fic for humor and a bit of romance. Max and the flock are invited to Ella's birthday party, an original celebration at the mall called 'Amazing Race.' The story takes place when Max and Fang accidentally pick the worst possible store in the mall: Victoria's Secret. There is a birthday cake, lingerie, a skanky cashier, and lots of Fax. :) I'm going to have to work on my summary writing skills.

Quotes:

"When running is the sole option, you run. When jumping is the sole option, you jump. When fighting is the sole option, you either RUN like hell, or ya FIGHT!"~ Me

"Oh, a sadistic vampire, intent on toturing her to death, sure, no problem, she runs off to meet him. An IV on the other hand..."~ Edward

"I vill now destroy de Snickuhs Bars!"~ Gazzy

"Listen, I've been practicing my barking! Arf! Or is it bowwow? I can never remember!"~ Total

"Life isn't fair, but it is funny!"~ Me

"When life gives you lemons, you make grape juice. Then you sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it!"~ Me

"Edward is so hot, he's cold!!"~ Me

"No, Emmett, I punched a werewolf in the face!!"~ Bella

"Stupid, shiny Volvo owner!"~ Bella

"If Angela turns out to be a witch, she can join the party, too."~ Bella

"Yes, because a vampire slumber party is the pinnacle of safety concious behavior!"~ Bella

"Life sucks and then you die. Yeah should I be so lucky."~ Jake

"Holy insert a swear word of your choice here,"~ Fang

"Fang, Fang, Fang. I love you. I love you sooo much."~ Max on Valium

"A good friend will fetch you an ice pack when you have a bruise. A best friend will be the reason you even got it!"~ Me

"A good friend will comfort you when he dumps you. A best friend will go up to him and say, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"~ Twilight Journey

"Isn't it ironic that "poli" means many in latin and "tics" mean blood-sucking creatures??"~ Twilight Journey

"Unusual like what? A double rainbow? Gasoline for less than a buck-fifty? Sugar-free soda that actually tastes good?"~ Dr. Martinez

"I don't have an attitude, you stupid idiot!!"~ Athena

"Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today."~ Athena

"You laugh. I laugh. You cry. I cry. You jump off a bridge. I go fetch a rowboat to save your stupid ass."~ Twilight Journey

"Jacob may be hot... but I live in Texas, and I need a cool guy."~ Klaire

"Boys are like trees, they take 50 years to grow up."~ Twilight Journey

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Post this on your profile if you hate racism.

A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year.

She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm trees, she asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger.

When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it.

However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her.

She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection.

Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her.

When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there.

Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to cry.

Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station.

She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story.

The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him.

She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before.

When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed.

The officer thanked her for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her.

She asked if they would ask the man one question.

She was curious as to why he had not attacked her.

When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her."

You're never alone...

93 Percent Of the people who read this won't repost it.

Don't be one of those people.

Believe in God and he'll always be there to protect you.

15 Things to do in Walmart

1. Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

3. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

4. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

5. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

6. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

7. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

8. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "NO! NO! It's those voices again!"

9. Walk up to random people, give them bear hugs, and say very loudly that you missed them and they never really did get that dandruff shampoo you recommended.

10. Jump in a cart and have a friend push you while you scream "The Germans are coming!"

11. Attempt to fly off a high shelf.

12. Run up to an employee and ask "Do you like me?" If they say no, yell out "You broke my heart, you evil monster! I'm telling the manager!" and start throwing canned tomatoes at them. If they say yes just to get you away, pat their shoulder, and say "What a shame because that girl over there" point to a random person "was just about to ask you to dinner."

13. Throw confetti on random people walking into the store.

14. Walk into the baby clothes section, pick up a pink baby dress, then throw it down and run away screaming that the pink bunnies of doom came back.

15. Practice your juggling with a few Grade-A eggs.

Copy and Paste Thingamajigers (You know you luv 'em):

If you love me for boring you with these wonderful copy and paste thingies, then copy and past this is your profile.

If you have done something so incredibly stupid once in your life, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you love driving your friends insane for no apparent reason, then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever climbed a tree, fallen off, hurt yourself, and then climbed right back onto it, copy and paste the in your profile.

If your copy of Harry Potter has all sorts of crap on it from the all places you have taken it (i.e. dinner, bathroom), copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have memorized Twilight and can quote entire scenes fromt the book, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you parents have found out about a prank call that you made, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you think Fang is so smexy he is on the verge of exploding from smexiness, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you are an insane, mental weirdo and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile.

If your friends threaten you by pretending to call the mental asylum, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you have read all the copy and paste thingies up to here, copy and past this in your profile.

If you want to become an author whose books are as widely known and read as Twilight, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you can stare at your computer screen for hours trying to write a story, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you are the type of kid who think anything under a 95 is a bad grade, but tells others that their 83 is a good one, copy and past this in your profile.

If you really want me to stop writing these, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know Special A is the amazingest, awesumest, coolest, bestest, perfectest anime in the world, copy and paste this in your profile. (You know it is true)

If you think Kei is so AWESUM, copy and paste this in your profile.

K. So, you must be so freaking bored with me right now that you aren't even going to bother reading this, but if you are: Most of the quotes I got from my bffs Klaire (WorldWildlifeWings), Clare (luverofdafroggies), TwilightJourney, Taylor (school bff), and Athena (school bff)!! I made up the copy and paste things... :P

Now I gtg spaz out, cuz I just loaded myself with candy, sugar, and caffiene... MWAHAHAHA!! XP!!