"The third proved problematic. Until the case reached its end, I was reduced to nothing but an absent gaze. Think of it this way: I was a pair of abstract eyes walking around wearing my flesh as a disguise. Living as such, there was no point in expecting any form of societal responsibility or human reaction."

-Kiyoshi Kasai, Bye-bye Angel

Writing this right now seems utterly pointless. I'm not really of importance, just the fact that I'm writing tells you that I'm breathing, correct? If you'd really like to know, my current identity would be of Silence Seraphin. I write, fantasize, live-that's pretty much my life in a gist. I guess you could say I'm pretty boring (laughs). I'm the kind of person you'd find lying down lazily on the bed all day with a warm blanket and the laptop in front of her. And then you'd notice the chocolaty smell of the room and then you'd go, 'This girl's nuts.' No, I'm not. I don't like nuts, except maybe macadamias, but that's beside the point.

I like drawing and papering the remaining wall-space in my room with pictures I make. My guardians complain about the nasty Copic-marker scent that's usually disguised by the scent of Tide and chocolate. I collect books. Since my small room doesn't really allow for much storing space, my bookshelf can only hold so much.

As I'm staring at it now, I count 52 novels, 13 Photoshop and computer how-tos, four large stacks of partially-used notebooks and sketch-books, 116 graphic novels and manga, two jars of Vaseline, a pig lamp, a Pandapple plushy, five school textbooks, 30-or-so classical, alternative rock, traditional, punk, grunge, and trance CDs, a few antiques, a Tootsie-roll plushy, iPod crap, and crayons. Then there's my desk. I don't think you need a description of the mess on there-the mayhem that includes countless art supplies, a desktop computer, books, more crayons, more iPod crap, Skullcandy headphones, homework, socks, pants, pajamas, T-Shirts, plushies, sketch-books, screen-tones, and four manuscripts for ongoing stories I'm doing. Gah... my room's chaos. I can't really move off my bed, so that's why I'm always lazy-ing around it.

With the seemingly random things scattered around my room, I'm pretty sure you can deduct what kind of chronic schizophrenic person I am. Note that I haven't given out any more information. Chances are you might know me in real life. I'm particularly finicky about people knowing me from online, so I'll put this to a short. Also, I've only described these things so you can partially decode my personality. I'm not expecting you to make a mad dash at the neighborhood otaku, wondering if that's me. A sound 94 chance says that it's not me. I don't really enjoy leaving my house, but when I have to, namely for my 'required education,' I'm an entirely different person around other persons, mostly because my façade tells me to. Quite vexing, but I've gotten used to it (laughs). This is how my friend A tells me: "God, you have two different personalities. When you're around people, you're cheerful. Then you retreat into this creepy secluded hermit when you're around close friends or alone." I feel none different.

Any-who, to finish off this seemingly endless personal rant, I need reviews! The lack of reviews is disappointing me; I've read other fan fictions that are, in my opinion, scantily-written, but they have so much more praise and critique than mine does. My conclusion is that my writing style is too boring. Perhaps my prose should be purposely made worse for 'constructive criticism?' No, that'd be cheating. But, in all modesty, please review! Or I'll discontinue my stories here. In all seriousness, if I don't get people appreciating it, what's the point of posting it? If I don't get an increase in reviews and viewers, I'll be forced to read them myself for my own pleasure (which is what I do while locked up in the bathroom and my bedroom, mind you.)! I'll offer anybody a soda pop if they review! Or perhaps a strawberry German Chocolate cake would suffice...?

That's enough about me. Onto my rant about my stories...

THE RANT, TAKE ONE:

The first story I wrote... gah, no. What's with the arch tone?

THE RANT, TAKE TWO:

@ I can't do this. L Let's hope three's the charm...

THE RANT, TAKE THREE:

The Legends of Alkali: This is an original story that I couldn't be bothered to make an account on FictionPress for (laughs). And so comes out the story of a regular boy named Jimmy, who succumbs to his dreams of a world called Alkali, where there are beings, called 'Siens,' that control the elements. When he somehow gets a hold of the legendary Mirage Orb, the one thing that controls the life on Alkali, however, he is sent spiraling into an adventure-making new and seemingly impossible friends, including Fire-Sien Shin, Earth/Water/Air hybrid Ayumi, Earth Clan leader Michiyo, the Avatar herself, Notte, her Earth/Fire hybrid accomplice Aiko, evil (yet preposterously stupid) David and Ilizar, Dark Siens, Air Siens, Light Siens, Fire Siens, Water Siens, Earth Siens, you name it! And all over a dream world with a dunce of an Avatar... Complete, 15 chapters

Valentin Omedetou: This is a story I wrote on whim for a contest on that website for Naruto fan fictions... I've forgotten the name of the site (laughs). Hinata seems haunted by the thought of loving two men- Naruto and Sasuke. When she is forced to do nothing but the old 'Eenie Meenie Miney Mo' trick to pick between the two, she's wracked by nerves to finally tell Sasuke how she feels and give him her chocolate on Valentine's Day. There, she's caught by love-boy himself, who couldn't bother to train with a certain shy, raven-haired Hyuuga girl preoccupying his mind. Complete; one-shot

Un Jeu De Folie: Further Flower is an orphan. Abandoned of familial love, she is recognized by Quillish Wammy for her exceptional hacking and intelligence levels, and taken in at the Wammy House. When she arrives, however, she is met by nothing but trouble-she is faced by a sugar-obsessed detective, an albino ten year-old with toy robots, a girly leather-donning boy with chocolate, and a gorgeous red-haired boy who seems to be brooding over his recent loss of his favorite hobby-video games. Can she console him to forgive Mello for telling Roger about his lack of focus while playing video games? Can she beat him at Guitar Hero for his apologies? Can he finish cleaning her room on time for the end of the week? Or can she give him the love both of them are missing? We welcome you to join the mayhem. Complete; one-shot

The Yakuza Tattoos: A series of one-shots detailing modern Yakuza Japan-in the slums, where the shunned dwell, with the scent of blood and the sounds of ricocheting bullets in the air. Only the yakuza can comfort each other, that is, if their lonely hearts will allow them to depart from their violent ways. Death cannot separate two lovers, even when they are split with the most forbidden of all tasks... So far, it's NagatoxKonan, and I can't seem to find the inspiration for another one... maybe I'll make the next one NarutoxSasuke or something. Ongoing; one-shots

The Sakurazaki Chronicles: Tsubasa: A very painful sort of story to write. There's really not a sense of freedom in writing pre-Shippuuden... Sakurazaki Setsuna, or as her alias is in the world of underground kendo competitions, is travelling via train to Tokyo, where she is expected for her championship tournament for the top kendo practitioner, a tragic event occurs, and the train crashes in a bomb. Unknown to her, this signs the Third World War, but she dies and is sent to a parallel universe three years younger, a place that both shocks and amazes her. In the Naruto world, she is greeted by all the familiar people that she only knew in black-and-white weekly manga segments, but now, she falls in love with the ever-colorful Uchiha Sasuke, a person that she had sworn to hate ever since she had read his character... SasukexOC Ongoing; 7 chapters

The Sakurazaki Chronicles: Sora: The sequel to Tsubasa and a whole lot easier to write. This takes place in Shippuuden Naruto, where 'Setsuna' finds herself in the Akatsuki headquarters in Amegakure, in the presence of God and his Messenger. With her newly discovered Rin'negan eyes, she'll rule beside him, and help fulfill the God's Deed. However, inevitably, she becomes smitten with the first Uchiha brother, Itachi, after she's returned to her true, more mature age. Now 19, she's unaware that her eyes and purpose of her being in the Naruto world is to destroy it completely, starting with her friends... ItachixOC Ongoing; 14 chapters

NOT YET POSTED BUT STILL EXISTS SOMEWHERE ON THE DESK:

The Sakurazaki Chronicles: Nocturne: Sakurazaki Setsuna finds herself in yet another world after dying an unavoidable death in the Naruto World, and finds herself in the place she'd rather commit suicide than being in-Twilight. She drops her 'Setsuna' alias, and names herself Fate Amorosa. However, she discovers that Miss Meyer, the crazy Prozac lady who wrote the series isn't so bad with descriptions after all, when it seems that the people are in fact, a lot more gorgeous than life-and that another love triangle will erupt, bursting another flame into something that will turn out to be a war between two species. I think this is going to be JacobxOCxJasper. I'm really not entirely sure, but I enjoy those two characters, as much as I genuinely dislike Twilight. I started this in my Twilight-bashing phase, and will probably end it very quickly, because that phase is ending and my hate for it will never diminish. Enjoy it if you will.

The Sakurazaki Chronicles: Morte Aeterna: The sequel of the sequel of the sequel-oh my. It's a bit surprising that I'm actually planning and writing this far ahead, but this is Death Note, and oh my, my Death Note phase will flare and just keep flaring. Fate Amorosa is dead once more and finds herself on her unique, spiraling path to ultimate death. She's turned into an innocent eight year-old now, and feels weak. Her only choice is to stay in the alleyway in which she appears in and hope that she is found by the right people. Captured by a thug in London, she is rescued by the sympathetic Thierry Morello and taken to Wammy's House, where, to her utter satisfaction, the boy destined to be the world's greatest detective is. Falling into an unlikely relationship with the inhabitants of the house and with L Lawliet himself, the new Fate, Silence Seraphin, is challenged by the most difficult and unsolvable cases ever-including love and its impending doom upon her for the third time. LxOC, based on a clue in Death Note, where there's a rumor that L had a possible romance with the only girl assigned to his investigative team before Kira, named Silence Seraphin.

The Sakurazaki Chronicles: Permanea Nota: Silence is faced with a problem. The year 2004 is here, and she knows it's not long before a certain Yagami Light in Japan finds a black notebook labeled Death Note. After all, spending 15 out of the realistically speaking, 35 years of your life with the man you most certainly love gives you the immediate thought to protect him, no matter what. So when L and S go to Japan to find the culprit of the serial killings, Silence knows what's going on. Protecting L is her main priority and knowing what the killer will do is a plus. She takes the roll of being L for him as he works from the locked penthouse suite twenty floors from where Kira is being chained to Silence. The couple secretly plan out how to reveal Light... but how, if one more problem is posed? Hopefully, with Silence there, she can prevent the death of the one man she's actually ever really loved... LxOC. A bit duller than the one I can freely write, again. I'd have to follow the plotline of the original for this one, but for the other Death Note-centric one, I can do whatever I'd like with it. And the plot thickens...

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

These 'sequels' are subjective. They're going to change greatly, we all know that, pertaining to what exactly Setsuna/Fate/Silence's past is, because I haven't exactly really figured out that yet. I know Yuko the Witch is involved, and so is Negima!, strangely, Tsubasa, xxxHolic, oh my. Seems as though my OC has no real home after all, but merely started out her memories as a baby in the xxxHolic world, and had many other homes before that, but simply couldn't remember because of her undeveloped infant brain. I feel bad for her, though. After all, in Morte Aeterna, she refers to life as a straight line, but hers being the only unique one that spirals downwards, then upwards when she dies again, and then goes down from Square One. I don't have anything planned after Permanea Nota, so I can hope that she finally dies happy with L and I don't have to make up more damned random names for her on the spot. Lolz. I hope you expect a whole deal more of random one-shots from me, because that's what you're going to get, no matter what (laughs). You can stop my really super-long stories, but stopping the equilibrium of one-shots coming from my brain every science and English period during school will never succeed. Alright, with that, I'm out, with one last message, in the words of Min Ayahana-sensei...

"Love and courage and hope-Holy Up!"