Hey my name is Kathleen but you may also know me as "Alice Cullen and Jasper Hale." I am 16 and from Scotland. I love to read and write so that is why I made this account. A few of my favourite books are Twilight (Team Edward for ever!), New moon, Eclipse, Breaking Dawn, The Harry Potter Series, The Demonata Books, Mort, Reaper Man, The Hogfather, Soul Music, The Golden Compass, The Subtle Knife and The Amber Spyglass.

I also love Doctor Who. New episode on soon can't wait. Why does David Tennent have to leave he is the best Doctor ever. =(

I also should warn you that I am completely obsessed with Twilight.

Favorite...
Color: Dark Blue
Drink: Coke a cola
Number: 21
Book: Twilight
Sport: Basketball
Subject: Biology
Quote: From Eclipse, "Yes because a vampire sleepover party is the pinnacle of safty consious behavior."

Please read and review my stories.

Funny Quotes

Come to the dark side... dun dun dun...cause we got Edward Cullen.

"He gave her 12 roses, 11 real and 1 fake, and said "I'll love you until the last rose dies."

"It takes 42 muscles to frown,28 muscles to smile,but only 4 muscles to reach out and slap someone."

"Doctors say I have multiple personalities. We disagree with that."

"When life gives you lemons,make apple juice,then laugh while people try to figure out what the hell you did."

"When life gives you lemons, chuck them at the people you hate."

"It doesnt matter whether the glass is half empty or half full,just drink it and get it over with."

"I'm not afraid of Death.What's he gonna do,kill me?"

"I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you!"

If you think Mike Newton should be run over by a bus copy and paste this into your profile

If you think that bus should also take out Eric copy and paste this into your profile

If you hate Mike and you're not afraid to say it, paste this into your profile

If you think Jessica can be annoying paste this into your profile

If you support the "Make Edward change Bella into a vampire" club, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think Jacob should just stay a friend and have a happy ending copy and paste this into your profile.

If you love Emmett Cullen, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you love Rosalie Hale, copy and paste this into your profile.

If writing gives you a high way better than drugs ever could, copy and paste this into yout profile.

If you could sit in front of your computer for hours making up stuff you can copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile!

The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever fallen up a flight of stairs, copy this, put it in your profile

If you think that the Twilight series will rule the universe, copy this into your profile.

If you think that Bella and Edward were meant to be together, copy this into your profile!

If you belive your own Edward Cullen is out there somewhere, add this.

If you've ever fallen down the stairs/tripped and laughed because it was something Bella would do, then you cried cause' Edward wasn't there to catch you copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know you have an unhealthy obsession with any or all of the Cullens, but you don't really care because you don't want to heal quite frankly, post this. (I admit it, I'm overly obsessed, but I don't care!)

If whenever you see or hear the name 'Edward' you freak out and have a small fit because you love him so much and then people stare at you and tell you to shut up and let it go, post this.

If you have Twilight/New Moon/Eclipse/Breaking Dawn memorized, post this

If you love reading Twilight fanfiction copy and past this to your profile

If you want Bella and Edward to get married copy and past this to your profile.

If you want Jacob to just grow up and imprint already copy and past this to your profile. (no offense to Jacob lovers)

If you loved Harry Potter at first but once you read Twilight you fell in love with Edward Anthony Masen Cullen copy and past this to your profile.

If you spend your free time making your own Twilight 'if you evers' and 'you know your obsessed when' then copy and past this to your profile.

If you completely got over your Harry Potter obseession when you read Twilight, copy and paste this on your program

If you cried when Edward left Bella in New Moon copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think that Twilight is the best book known to woman (and man)...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've reread Twilight over four times...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If when ever you see the name Edward or anything close to Edward you start giggling uncontrollably, copy and past this to your profile.

If when ever you see the name Cullen or anything close to Cullen you start giggling uncontrollably, copy and past this to your profile.

If Every time at twilight you say 'It's twilight, it's the safest time for us' Copy this into your profile

When every you see an apple you think of twilight copy this into you profile

If you have ever been so obsessed with Twilight that whenever you hear thunder you think of vampires playing baseball. Copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever tried blocking your thoughts about how georgous Edward Cullen is because you don't want said georgous Edward Cullen to hear, copy and paste this into your profile

If you walk around you house talking to your self about something that happened in one of the twilight books Copy this into your profile

If when ever you are out in public and you hear something relating to Twilight you want to scream and squeal, but you don't 'cause you're in public, so you just get a goofy grin on your face. Post this

If you are in LOVE with Edward Anthony Masen Cullen copy and past this to your profile.

If you think that all other vampire stories are 'fakes' after you've read Twilight post this

If you think the Cullen's should have their own theme music. Copy this to your Profile

If you spit every time you hear vile Mike Newton's name, copy and paste this into your profile

If you love everything about the Twilight series copy and past this to your profile.

If you think Edward Cullen is hot...copy and paste this onto your profile.

If the only thing you think about is the Twilight series copy and past this to your profile.

If you are Obsessed/Addicted to the Twilight series copy and past this to your profile.

When ever you see a shiny silver Volvo you start following it shouting "I LOVE YOU EDWARD CULLEN!" copy this to your profile.

If your in love with a fictional character (like edward anthony mason cullen) copy and paste this is you profile

If people mistake you for a vampire, copy and past this to your profile.

If you mistake pale people at your school as vampires, copy and past this to your profile.

If you are making up your own Twilight "If You"s then copy and past this to your profile.

While reading Twilight you grabbed a dictionary and looked up the word Ostentatious and now you use it in every sentence even if it doesn't sense.

If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward, from twilight, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you're a proud stalker and obsessed love-struck girl of Edward Anthony Masen Cullen, copy this into your profile.

If when you have a child, you'd consider naming them Edward or Anthony, copy this into your profile.

AACIBD is Addicted to All Cullen’s Including Bella Disorder

AV is Addicted to Vampires

If you are addicted to vampires and would like to become one, post this onto your profile.

If you are so obsessed with Twilight that it is NOT even funny anymore, copy this into your profile

You know you live in 2009 when...

1. You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2. You haven’t played solitaire with real cards in years.

3. The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is that they don't have AIM/LiveJournal/MySpace.

4. You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the button on the TV.

6. Your evening activity is sitting at the computer.

7. As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

8. You read this list, and keep nodding and smiling.

9. You think about how stupid you are for reading this.

10. You were too busy to notice number five.

11. You actually scrolled back up to check if there was a number five.

12. And now you're laughing at your stupidity.

13. Put this in your profile if you fell for it. You know you did.

Edward Cullen: Sexier Than You Since 1901

Emmett Cullen: Stronger Than You Since 1916

Rosalie Cullen: Prettier Than You Since 1916

Alice Cullen: Quikier Than You Since 1901

Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies Since 1843

Bella Swan: Danger Magnet since 1987

TEAM ROSALIE: because deep down we all think she's awesome.

TEAM JASPER: because he can snap at me anytime.

TEAM ESME: because she's the coolest mother ever.

TEAM EMMETT: because we all love a guy with muscles.

TEAM EDWARD: because we wish all guys were this perfect.

TEAM CARLISLE: because all doctors should be this hot.

TEAM BELLA: because she's Edward's girl.

TEAM ALICE: because seeing things before they happen rocks.

Lessons Learned From Twilight

1. You can enjoy the banquet while resisting the wine.
2. The future is not set in stone.
3. Men are crabby when they're hungry.
4. Nothing beats an irritable grizzly bear.
5. True love knows no boundaries.
6. Some people are just danger magnets.
7. Even eternal enemies can work together to save something they love.
8. Forget the fangs - real vampires sparkle!
9. Soul mates exist, even if it takes 100 years to find them.
10. Porshe 911 Turbos make really great bribes.
11. Friendship is like the sun on a cloudy day.
12. Snow just means it's too cold for rain.
13. Family is about more than just blood.
14. What's worth doing is worth over-doing.
15. Losing your temper can be hair-raising.
16. "Vegetarian" has many meanings.
17. Even monsters can hold on to their humanity.
18. There are exceptions to every rule.
19. Always verify bad news before doing something stupid.
20. Hearing voices in your head doesn't necessarily mean you're crazy.
21. Love means being willing to sacrifice your happiness for another's.
22. Cold hands = Warm heart.
23. Not breathing is uncomfortable.
24. Stupid lambs and masochistic lions make quite a pair.
25. Romeo was an idiot.
26. Twilight is the saddest and safest time of day.
27. Extreme sports should not be attempted alone.
28. Life is worth very little without someone to share it with.
29. Space heaters can be very annoying.
30. Love can make even the most miserable places paradise.