A challenge response to Akun50's 'Unique Power-Ups' thread on The Fanfiction Forum. Kakashi is about to have a very bad day. Team 7 centric. No longer a one-shot.

Hey, wouldn't it be cool if someone took as many fanfic cliches as possible and stuffed them all into one story? No? Well, I went ahead and did it anyway. Multi-chapter Mockfic. This summary is actually a lot better than I originally thought.

Sasuke and Sakura finally realize their destiny to be with each other...on their deathbeds. Fate decides it isn't the end and sends them back in time to right the wrongs. But is it really the past?

A strangely beautiful female has arrived and been accepted into the Akatsuki, and she, incredibly, manages to have all the male members twirled around her finger. But Konan, Konan feels that something's wrong, and that prediction was-unfortunately-very right. Slight bit of Pein/Konan if you squint (squint really hard). Warning: Obvious Mary-Sue.

Kakashi thought he knew what he was getting into when he arrived at the training ground that morning. But for some reason, it was decided that he'd thought wrong. So, what exactly is poor Kakashi supposed to do now? Rating subject to change and pairings undecided (though likely to have at least NaruHina)

You know, maybe there was a good reason why Naruto didn't learn Hiraishin no Jutsu during the time-skip...

Mid-timeskip, Sakura misses Sasuke. So much that she takes it upon herself to go find him. Alone. Without telling anyone. What, dangerous? Don't be silly. ItaXSaku. Squee. Mockfic, OoC, 4th wall breaking. Not one of my better works, but here you go.

Sequel to 'What's the Worst That Could Happen'. Naruto and Kyubi are in a hopeless situation with absolutely no logical way of getting out of it. But hey, since when has a little thing like logic ever stood in the way of a good fanfic plot? Mockfic.

In the manga, when Itachi killed his clan and mind-raped Sasuke, he gave him some strange words to live by. What if Sasuke actually took those words to heart? Not Yaoi.

You may never look at Harry/Tonks the same way again. Mockfic.

Finally, the story at its original end! See how things were supposed to turn out! And if you believe this really is the original ending, I have a Bridge in Grass Country to sell you...

Gaara knew that being the youngest Kazekage in history would be difficult, but nothing could have possibly prepared him for something like this. Mockfic. I am highly proficient at summaries.

You know the typical high school fic? Well Naruto doesn't. Warning: Fourth Wall breaking. Mock fic. Also, I'm awesome at summaries!

Ten year old Sasuke interupts a white haired middle aged man peeping on some girls. He soon finds that perverts are some of the worst people to tick off.

Shortly after the Godaime Arc, someone decides that Tsunade needs to stick around a bit longer than she normally would. Updated to fix the format.

When Kakashi needs to leave on an ANBU mission, he doesn't want Team 7 to simply lay about with the Chuunin Exams coming up, so he pays a Jonin to take over while he's away.

Sasuke shocks everyone by retiring from Team 7.

Who is this mysterious man who suddenly appears out of nowhere to save the lives of our Konoha heros from the likes of Orochimaru and Akatsuki? ...Gee, who do you think? Mockfic.