There are things you must know about Bat.
Bat is turning fourteen in January.
Bat lives in Ottawa but wishes he lived in Calgary with Rinaidran Warrior. Bat is probably taller than you.
Bat is an alien cannibal and you taste good dipped in cheese.

Bat will not say where in Ottawa he lives, because he has many evil enemies. *shifty eyes* Bat will tell you, though, that he is probably the only Yuugiou fan alive that supports Mai x Yami no Bakura. He also is probably the only Wind Waker fan that likes Link x the Fairy Queen.

Bat is not the only Zelda fan that hates the new Wind Waker Deku Tree. Rinaidran Warrior thinks that the Tree looks simply evil. We also both think that Daphnes is a stupid name for a king of Hyrule because it sounds like Daphne. We think the king's name is really Harkinian, because that was his name in the Zelda: Link to the Past manga.

Now, Bat will answer questions from his future subjects and joint rulers.

Rinaidran Warrior: Why does Bat speak in third person?
Bat: Bat does not know.
DavidSchmavid: Hello, RW! So we're finally on email at the same time.
Bat: This is not a chatboard, DavidSchmavid. Bat commands you to go away.
DS: Why is Bat so mean to me?
Bat: Because you are an idiot and you taste good dipped in cheese.
RW: Yep, that's Bat's favorite comeback. You taste good dipped in cheese. Mine is a really freaky type of smile.
Bat: Bat knows, RW.
RW: *does freaky smile* ^_^

So, the people wonder, what does Bat write about? Well, Bat will tell the stupid people.

Yuugiou
Zelda: a Link to the Past
Zelda: The Wind Waker
Harry Potter
Zodiac Knights (if they even have a section for it)
Lord of the Rings

What couplings does Bat like? Well, he will tell you. BWAHAHA-*coughcough*-Hahahaha.

Mai x Yami no Bakura
Seto x Serenity
Malik x Anzu
Mai x Jou
JOU X ANZU
Link x Fairy Queen (THERE IS EVIDENCE! BAT HAS SEEN IT!)
Link x Medli
Link x Zelda (LINK TO THE PAST, RW! MALON WAS DEAD! Don't hate me, RW)
Harry x Hermione
Ron x Hermione
Harry x Ginny
Eowyn x Faramir
Boromir x Arwen
Legolas x Arwen
Legolas x Eowyn
Aragorn x NO ONE! Bwahaha-*coughhack*-hahahaha.

That is all, loyal followers. Bat is signing off now. .. ... ... ... ... .. Seriously. * * * * * * FAREWELL! *sweeps out*
RW: I'm all alone...*leaves*