Greetings, people of Planet Dirt! Designation 842397, alias "Sighani", reporting for duty. Doubtless you have stumbled upon this page in order to collect random bits of information on me in hopes of catching a glimpse into my brilliant psyche. Or perhaps you were merely wandering through the infinite reaches of the universe (and if the universe is indeed infinite, are you really moving at all?) and stumbled upon this page by blind, stupid, zippadee-doo-dah luck. In any case, I hope you enjoy your visit. I have not yet become a hobo who writes stories on dumpsters in human excrement, and I do not fancy the taste of cardboard or sewer rats. I am still sane enough to know that cherry Slurpees are the best and that children are not for eating.

I read. I critique. I write sometimes. I do not flame. Even if your story is a steaming pile not fit to sully the bottom of a bum's blown-out sneaker, I will embrace it in all its filthiness, enslave your firstborn, and maybe even add lye to your bubble bath, but I will not flame. I'm nicer than that. Or maybe just too prideful to sink to such levels. In either case, it's your gain! See how generous I am?

I haven't updated my stories in quite some time. Everything on this account is likely old and horrible. Don't hold it against me. We're all dumb, eager whippersnappers at some point (except Jack Nicholson, but that's another story entirely) so we really can't blame others for our youthful failures. I have a wide range of fanfiction interests (mostly Invader Zim, Harry Potter, Kingdom Hearts, X-Men, and anything of the Final Fantasy variety), and if you like The Beatles we are automatically friends. Nothing creepy and stalkerish, but I hope you're a decent enough person (you like the Beatles, after all!) to take part in a mutual respect for impeccable tastes.

About my writing style: I like parentheticals, commas, and metaphors. Of the three, I use commas the most. And much in the same manner diabetics can slip into horrible comas in which there is no hope of waking, I sometimes slip into bouts of dark, graphic prose. Be warned. After the literary abomination that is Twilight, many people lost their tolerance for prose and metaphor. I hope you won't throw me into the same damned pit as Stephanie Meyer.

Fics:

Die Asche Meines Herzens
Jhonen Vasquez
Progress: HIATUS Chapter 2 posted. Chapter 3: 0 percent. Goldenstargirl is continuing this story--go read hers.

Guilty Pleasure
Kingdom Hearts
Progress: Complete (horrible oneshot of absolute DOOM! Plotless and utterly useless, it was written solely for the purpose of me trying to use description).

Little Wonders
Calvin & Hobbes
Progress: Complete.