Welcome to my page. To start off, I'm obsessed with the book series of Twilight, Vampire Diaries, Percy Jackson, Kane Chronicles, and Heroes of Olympus. I'm in LOVE with the anime Durarara!!/デュラララ!!, so much so that I created the first English role-playing site on the interent for it, so if you are interested, please join us at Durarara!!/デュラララ!! Role Play because we'd love to have you :3 it doesn't matter what your role-playing history is, we appreciate any experienced role-players and teach any first time role-players how to role-play, so don't let anything stop you!

I've met AMAZINGLY AWESOME authors on fanfiction: magicangel33, Epic Secret Mythology, MidnightRose24, Taylur, and ThePhonyOversized. Check them out! They're amazing!

WARNING LABELS THAT KINDA SCARE ME

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( But that's the only tme I have to do my hair!).

On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...And why do you bother to ask?...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (andI'm taking this because?...)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash!!!!!!)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

On a Package of Artificial Bacon: REAL Artificial Bacon (So your bacon's not fake fake bacon, it's REAL fake bacon)

COPY AND PASTE

If you run into inanimate objects...and then blame them for it copy and paste this in your profile

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever just been too confused to understand anything, put this in your profile.

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever tripped down the stairs copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped up the stairs copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

SARCASM

Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.

If you can smile when things go wrong, you have someone in mind to blame.

I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.

Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.

I’m smiling. This should scare you.

The universe is laughing behind your back.

Nothing is more discouraging than unappreciated sarcasm.

If you’re one in a million, there are six thousand people exactly like you.

Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.

I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

Blows are sarcasms turned stupid.

A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

I’m not sure what’s wrong… But it’s probably your fault.

This place is so weird that the cockroaches have moved next door.

The world will end tomorrow (unless postponed by rain).

I never admit or deny anything it makes me more interesting.

By the time you read this you’ve already read it.

Whatever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much. You’re not that good.

Don’t be humble. You’re not that great.

I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.

He was happily married – but his wife wasn’t.

He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.

If you’re too open-minded, your brains will fall out.

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.

Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.

Sarcasm I now see to be, in general, the language of the devil.

The grass may be greener on the other side but at least you don’t have to mow it.

There’s too much blood in my caffeine system.

Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.

"Shut up, will you?” “Oh, I’m sorry, Your Highness, should I go get you your coffee and tea now?"

I'm multi-talented: I can talk and piss you off at the same time

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Paper is supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? Why the hell can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why isn't notebook paper constantly suffocating students while they take notes in class? I'll tell you why: because paper can't beat anybody; a rock would tear that stuff up in 2 seconds. When I play rock/paper/scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to beat me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my already clenched fist and say, "Oh shoot, I'm sorry. I thought paper would protect you!"

When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking that I think that you're thinking I'm thinking because if you think that I think what I think I'm thinking then we've got a problem?

Honesty is the best policy but insanity is the best defense.

I'm not crazy, my reality is just different than yours.

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.

Love your enemies… it pisses them off.

A POINTLESS LIST!!!!!

1. You can't lick all of your teeth with your tongue.

2. You just tried to do the above.

3. The first truth is a lie.

4. You're smiling now because you're realizing you're an idiot.

5. You'll copy this into your profile for some other sucker to read it.

6. There's still a stupid smile on your face.

ADD stands for Attention Defici- look, a squirrel!!

When life gives you lemons, make grapefruit juice, and let life wonder how the heck you did that!

If you think rock paper scissors solves everything then copy and paste this in your profile.

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

If you ever HAD slapped someone, copy and paste this onto your profile

MENTAL HEALTH HOTLINE

Hello, welcome to the mental health hotline.

If you have obsessive compulsive disorder, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personality syndrome, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

If you suffer from paranoid schizophrenia, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transfered to the mothership.

If you are hearing voices, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which button you press. No one will answer anyway.

If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696.

If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the pound button until a representative comes on the line.

If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's and grandmother's maiden names.

If you have post traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 911.

If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep. Or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short term memory loss, please try you call again in a few minutes.

If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our representatives are busy.

Chuck Norris Jokes!

There is no such thing as evoulution, only a long list of animals Chuck Norris as allowed to live!

When Chuck Norris walks into the bathroom the mirror breaks becuase even it knows not to stand between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris!

Chuck Norris's tears can cure cancer. Too bad Chuck Norris doesn't cry!

Chuck Norris does not need to read. He just stares down the book til it gives him the info he needs!

If you misspelled "Chuck Norris" on Google it doesn't say "Did you mean Chuck Norris?" It says: "Run while you can!"

The reason babies cry when they are born is becuase they are born into a world with Chuck Norris!

Chuck Norris doesn't need a watch to tell time, Chuck Norris tells the watch what time it is!

Chuck Norris was the first man on Mars. That's why there is no life there.

Chuck Norris can do a whellie on a unicycle!

Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norrised!

Annoying things to do on an elevator: read this!:) very funny!!

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag,
peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in
there?"

2) STAND silent and motionless in the
corner facing the wall without getting off.

3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt
and strain to yank the doors open, then
act as if you're embarrassed when they
open themselves.

4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake
and ask him or her to call you Admiral.

5) MEOW occasionally.

6) STARE At another passenger for a
while. Then announce in horror: "You're
one of THEM" - and back away slowly

7) SAY -DING at each floor.

8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And
push all the red buttons.

9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone
presses a button.

10) STARE, grinning at another passenger
for a while, then announce: "I have new
socks on."

11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look
around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"

12) TRY to make personal calls on the
emergency phone.

13) DRAW a little square on the floor
with chalk and announce to the other
passengers: "This is my personal space."

14) WHEN there's only one other person
in the elevator, tap them on the
shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.

15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they
give you a shock. Smile, and go back for
more.

16) ASK if you can push the button for
other people but push the wrong ones.

17) HOLD the doors open and say you're
waiting for your friend. After a while,
let the doors close and say "Hi Greg,
How's your day been?"

18) DROP a pen and wail until someone
reaches to help pick it up, then scream:
"That's mine!"

19) BRING a camera and take pictures of
everyone in the lift.

20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant
and review emergency procedures and
exits with the Passengers.

Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die.

Guys should be like lattes - rich, strong, and hot

Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is cute, screw the fruit!

Boys are like trees - they take 50 years to grow up.

Girls are like phones. We love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!

FYI: you are NOT bringing sexy back

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.

Myspace my Youtube and I'll Google your YAHOO

Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.

Was that an earthquake, or did I just rock your world?

What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?
'Hold my purse.'

Don't hate yourself in the morning - sleep till noon.

Therapist = The/rapist... scary thought

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

I live in a world full of bunnies and unicorns...but the bunnies are cutting themselves and the unicorns are acting all emo again

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!

Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!

-If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried

-Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

-Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

-Guns don’t kill people. Bullets kill people.

-Trying is the first step toward failure

-A friend would bail you out of jail. A best friend will be sitting next to you in the cell saying "That was fun"

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

I ran with scissors, and lived!

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder

We is friends u cry i cry u laf i laf u jump off a bridge, i gonna miss ur ims

"Wal-Mart, do they, like, sell walls there?" - Paris Hilton

Fergie taught me how to spell delicious and glamorous. But not so much tastey!

Huh, it figures. All the good guys are taken, vampires, or both.

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.

I agree with the dictionary. gals before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

I don't obsess! I think intensely.

There are three kinds of people in the world; ones that can count and ones that can't count.

I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people.

when life gives you lemons spit lemons into lifes eyes

when life gives you lemons make grape juice and let the world wonder how you did it

98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile.

92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your head off!

If you think those stupid kids should just give the rabbit the freakin' Trix, copy this into your profile

If you think the Coca-coca Puff Turky-Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this into your profile.

If you think that the kids should stop chasing Lucky and leave the leprechaun alone, then copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think Fred should just let Barney have the freakin' Coco Pebbles and stop chasing him, then copy and paste this in your profile.

If you think that the Cookie Crisp wolf should stop coping the Trix Rabbit and needs to get his own life, copy and paste this into your profile.

My mind works like lightning...one flash and then it's gone.

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why not.

Sticks and Stones may scar my skin but words slice through my soul within

This isn't just goodbye, this is I can't stand you.

iIf olive oil comes from olive's then where does baby oil come from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Whoever said nothings's impossible, they never tryed slamming a revoling door!

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there ... I'm gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt”?..

Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man : If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys dont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy.So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality they are amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

I'm not as think as I drunk you am!!

Silent is golden but duck tape is silver

You call me a b? Because a b is a dog. Dogs bark. Bark grows on trees. Trees are a part of nature. Nature is beautiful. I know I'm beautiful, thanks for noticing.

If you still have to think 'righty tighty, left loosy' when opening, well, anything, copy this into your profile.

A friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend continues walking while saying, "Walk much dumbass?"
A friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "RUN, -BEEP- RUN!"
A friend wipes your tears when your rejected. A best friend goes up to him and says, "It's because your gay isn't it?"
A friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "THAT WAS AWESOME , LETS DO IT AGAIN!!" or "Dang, we screwed up."
A friend will always be like "well you deserve better". A best friends will be prank calling him saying "you will die in seven days".

If you and your friend break out into song in a public area put this on your profile

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

I agree with the dictionary. Girls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?

Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?

Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do . . . write to these men?

Why is dyslexic so hard to spell?

Why is verb a noun?

Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we're already there?

Why is it called after dark when really it's after light?

You know you live in 2010

when...

1.) You accidentally enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years. (Shorty: I play it on my ipod!)

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is they dont have a screenname or myspace.

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the TV.

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job...

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all your friends.

9.) And you were too busy to notice number 5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a number 5.

11.) Now you are laughing at yourself stupidly.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did

Here's a joke...

there are 3 men who need to get across a lake...

the 1st one prays to God asking for the strength to get across...

he gets big muscles and swims across...

but almost dies 5 times...

the 2nd 1 prays to God for the strength and the tools he needs to get across...

he gets his big muscles and boat and rows across...

but he almost dies 3 times...

the 3rd 1 prays to God, for the strength, tools, and the brains...

he turns into a woman...

walks 4 yards...

and crosses the bridge

Percy Jackson & Friends School Day Schedule (That I USed To USe In Middle School But This Became So Nostalgic, I Just Couldn't Remove It :'3):

Monday: Made up PJO Character (Ferguson)

Tuesday: The Heros of Olympus Character (Piper McLean)

Wednesday: Kane Chronicles Character (Sadie Kane)

Thursday: PJO Character (Thalia)

Friday: Freebie Day (Nuff Said)

The schedule above is what a bunch of my friends follow everyweek. We act like our favorite character from the books. Freebie day is when your any of your characters or all of them changing hour by hour(*cough*my awesome best friend Relyt-Son-Of-Artemis-And-Pan who's on fanfiction.net too*cough*).