Hi there! Here's a little about me (because that's what these profile thingys are for right?)

I'm homeschooled, and have been all my life. I love to read, and now I love to write. I'm going to college as an English Major and I will Minor in music, specifically piano performance. I've played the piano for 16 years and I hope to be a music teacher in the future.

I live in the southern region USA and am a competitive Irish Dancer. I love theatre and dance, and my goal in life is to be the proud owner of a sailboat.

My two best friends are UpToNoGood12 and fanficmaster29.

If any of you are interested, my tumblr can be found HERE: You'll find a lot of fandoms/fanart and reblogging of sarcastic/funny/generally entertaining posts and once in a while I might post some of my own art as well!

I would like to apologize for the lack of updates! With school starting up, it's going to be hard to find time to write. But, rest assured I have not abandoned my stories, and will attempt to update ASAP! Thanks for reading...Dolfin

Dear Readers,

I regret to inform you that due to a set of rather distressing circumstances, my main story needed to be removed from ff.net. I'm incredibly sad about this, since I've received only the nicest and kindest of reviews and I've met many good friends from the conversations that started here. On a happier note, I am working on something similar that might make up for the sudden absence of my story. I hope you will all continue to read my other shorter works on here, but I can promise the story will not be back on ff.net. My apologies.

I know everyone says that coping someone is the greatest form of appreciation, but when someone takes your story - almost word for word, and posts it as their own work it's more than a little upsetting.

I love you all, and thank you for your support and reviews.

I'll let you know when you can expect more full-length works from me :)

Dolfin

DISCLAIMER: If any of the fandoms that I will be writing from actually belonged to me, my name would be famous or I would be dead. Therefore, I don't intend to claim ownership for any characters, titles, settings, or anything else that belongs to or is otherwise copywritten by someone who is obviously not me. Niether will I state the obvious with a disclaimer in EVERY SINGLE STORY. The movies, books, tv shows, ect. belong to their creators and not me. I only take credit for my own storylines and my own original characters. Thank you.

Favorite Actors: Jack Davenport, Tom Hiddleston, Johnny Depp, David Tennant, Robert Downey Jr., Jude Law, Bennedict Cumberbatch, Martin Freeman, Richard E. Grant, Martin Shaw, Anthony Andrews, Ian McKellen, Liam Neeson, Mark Harmon, and Ewan McGreggor.

Favorite Movies: Sherlock Holmes (2009), The Scarlet Pimpernel, Lord of The Rings, Harry Potter, Star Wars, Howl's Moving Castle, Pirates of The Caribbean, and The Avengers.

Fvorite TV Shows: BBC's Sherlock, Dr Who, BBC's The Scarlet Pimpernel, Psych, The Legend of Korra, Smash, and NCIS.

Favorite Books: The Scarlet Pimpernel, Sherlock Holmes, Eragon Series, Fablehaven Series, Harry Potter, Chronicles of Narnia, The Time Travelers, The FIRST Hunger Games, Larklight, and so many more, I can't possibly list them all!

Favorite Music/Bands: The Beatles, Owl City, Train, Jason Mraz, Transiberian Orchestra, anything by John Williams and/or Hans Zimmer, Classical (Especially Chopin), and most movie themes.

Quotes:

They seek him here,
They seek him there,
Those frenchies seek him everywhere!
Is he in Heaven?
Or is he in Hell?
That demmed elusive Pimpernel!
Sir Percy Blakeney (The Scarlet Pimpernel)

I don't sufffer from isnanity, I enjoy every minute of it! Sirius Black (Fanfic)

Most people think time is a strict progression from cause to effect, but ACTUALLY, from a non-linear, non-subjective viewpoint, it's a big ball of wibbly-wobbly...timey-wimey...stuff. The Doctor (Dr Who Episode: Blink)

Three serial suicides and now a note! Oh, it's CHRISTMAS!! Sherlock (A Study In Pink)

Sherlock: Shut up!
Lestrade: I didn't say anythin-
Sherlock: You were thinking it was annoying!
(A Study In Pink)

Me? I'm dishonest, and you can always trust a dishonest man to be dishonest. Honestly! It's the honest ones you want to watch out for because you never know when they're going to do something incredibly...stupid. Captain Jack Sparrow

Will Turner: You want me to find this?
Jack Sparrow: No, you want you to find this, because the finding of this finds you incapacitorilly finding and or locating in the discovering of the detecting of a way to save you're dolly belle 'Ol what's her face. Savvy?
Will Turner: This is going to save Elizabeth?
Jack Sparrow: How much do you know about Davy Jones?
Will Turner: Not much...
Jack Sparrow: Yeah it'll save Elizabeth.
(POTC Dead Man's Chest)

Cutler Beckett: You're Mad.
Jack Sparrow: Good thing to, 'cause if I wasn't this would probably never work.
(POTC Dead Man's Chest)

The ability to speak does not make you intelligent. Qui-gon Jinn (Star Wars: The Phantom Menace)

Space, it turns out, is not empty. Virtually the entire universe is made of stuff we know nothing about. National Geographic

With every passing hour our solar systen comes forty-tree thousand miles closer to globular cluster 13 in the constellation Hercules, and still there are some misfits who continue to insist that there is no such thing as progress. Ransom K. Fern

That intelligent creatures exist in outser space is proven by the fact that they have not contacted us.

A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the word you first thought of. Burt Bacharach

When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

From now on, we live in a world where man has walked on the moon. It wasn't a miracle, we just decided to go. Jim Lovell (Apollo13)

Outside a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside a dog, it's too dark to read. Groucho Marx

Two great things about being a writer: The voices in your head are normal, and daydreaming is mandatory.

When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever is left, however improbable, must be the truth. Sherlock Holmes

Dear God, what is it like in your funny little brains? It must be so BORING! Sherlock Holmes (BBC Sherlock)

Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the universe. Albert Einstein

I'd call you a genius except I'm in the room. Dr Who

We at the FBI do not have a sense of humour that we're aware of. "K" (Men in Black)

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

Watson: Get that out of my face.
Holmes: Its not in your face, its in my hand.
Watson: Then get what's in your hand out of my face!
Sherlock Holmes (2009)

Oh, the English and thier STUPID sense of fair play! Citizen Chauvelin

Being weird is like being normal, only better.

I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me.

Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright.

Boys are like Slinky's... useless, but fun to watch fall downstairs

There cannot be a crisis this week; my schedule is full.

Slamming a revolving door really is possible-you just won't get a BOOM.

Life isn't passing me by, its trying to run me over.

One day, will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject

When angry, count to ten, when very angry, swear.

It takes 42 muscles to frown, 28 to smile and only 4 to reach out and slap someone.

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people.

As you make your way through this hectic world of ours, set aside a few minutes each day. At the end of the year, you'll have a couple of days saved up.

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world wonder how you did it.

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.

Life is like a pack of gum... I've yet to figure out why.

Be insane... because well behaved girls never made history.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

Never knock on Death’s door, ring the doorbell and run away, he hates that.

Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out.

One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.

It’s always the last place you look. Of course it is why would I keep looking after I found it?

Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

"You know I hate that preposterous title!"
"Yes - that is why I use it."

Use your imagination--or you can borrow mine. -Murdock (The A-Team)

I love the smell of a revolution in the morning. It smells like hushpuppies. -Murdock

What we need is a little distraction. You got an atomic bomb? -Murdock

(After being accused of crashing a plane) No,no,no,NO; I merely relocated the aircraft with extreme prejudice because of a TOTAL LOSS OF THRUST AND LIFT FUNCTIONS!!!!! -Murdock

My size? My size is the amount of space I fill up. Thanks for asking. -Murdock

As soon as I find out who I am you'll be the first to know. -Murdock

I'm allergic to bullets. Especially those headed my direction. -Face (A-team)

I sometimes wonder if the manufacturers of foolproof items keep a fool or two on their payroll to test things. -Alan Coren

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception. -Groucho Marx

I believe in rules. Sure I do. If there weren't any rules, how could you break them? -Leo Duracher

If you're going to make every game a matter of life or death, you're going to have a lot of problems. For one thing, you'll be dead a lot. -Dean Smith

Some people are alive only because it is illegal to kill them.

My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right. -Ashleigh Brilliant

Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult. -Charlotte Whittond

English is a funny language--that explains why we park our car on the driveway and drive our car on the parkway. -Mark Grasso

Those who think they know everything are very annoying to those of us who do. -Terry Marchal

A word to the wise isn't necessary, it is the stupid ones who need all the advice. -Bill Cosby

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in Australia. -Charles Schulz

I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three. -Elayne Boosler

An expert is a man who tells you a simple thing in a confused way in such a fashion as to make you think the confusion is your own fault. -William Castle

You can't have everything... where would you put it? -Steven Wright

Love your enemies. It makes them so mad. P.D. East

My doctor says that I have a malformed public-duty gland and a natural deficiency in moral fiber, and that I am therefore excused from saving Universes. Douglas Adams

A signature always reveals a man's character - and sometimes even his name. Evan Esar

Who says nothing is impossible? I've been doing nothing for years.

Protect me from knowing what I don't need to know. Protect me from even knowing that there are things to know that I don't know. Protect me from knowing that I decided not to know about the things that I decided not to know about. Amen. Douglas Adams

Lord, lord, lord. Protect me from the consequences of the above prayer. Douglas Adams

You want to know were I'm from? Well, phisically, I live in the lovely United States of America. Mentally? You probably don't want to know...

Captain, I wish to report a mutiny. I can name fingers and point names. Captain Jack Sparrow

Lionel Logue: I believe sucking smoke into your lungs will kill you.
King George VI: My physicians say it relaxes the throat.
Lionel Logue: They're idiots.
King George VI: They've all been knighted.
Lionel Logue: Makes it official then.
(The King's Speech)

Irene Adler: Why are you always so suspicious?
Sherlock Holmes: Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically?
(Sherlock Holms 2009)

I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Dr Suess

Politicians are people who pretend they know what they're doing and get away with it.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away... if well-aimed.

I'm not so good at advice; may I interest you in a sarcastic reply?

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

Note to self: Normal is just a setting on washing machines.

When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing with you... you're just not laughing.

The statistics on insanity are that 1 of every 4 people has some kind of mental illness. Look at your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you.

I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?

The longer I live, the more convinced am I that this planet is used by other planets as a lunatic asylum.

I reject your reality and substitute my own. (Mythbusters)

Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night."

People who say it can't be done should not interrupt those of us who are doing it.

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.

Excuse me... have you seen my sanity?... I think I lost it.

It doesn’t matter whether the glass is half empty or half full just drink it and get it over with.

Those who throw objects at crocodiles will be asked to retrieve them.

Education is important, school however, is another matter.

A recent survey stated that the average person’s greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you’re telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy?

STRESS: a condition brought on by over-riding the body's desire to choke the living daylights out of some jerk who desperately deserves it.

WARNING: trespassers will be shot. WARNING: survivors will be shot again.

That which does not kill you, will probably try again.

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

If everything is going well, you've obviously overlooked something.

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

A day without sunshine is like. . . well, night.

Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end-to-end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them.

If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in the dark.

When nothing goes right...
go left.

I'm not RANDOM. You just can't think as FAST as me!

I have the cape. I make the WHOOSH noises!!

Whose joke was it for the fear of long words to be called hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia?

Smile: it confuses the enemy.

Those that ignore history are doomed to repeat it; those who studied history are doomed to know its repeating.

A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

Of course violence isn't the answer. 'Violence' is the question and 'yes' is the answer.

I refuse to engage in an intellectual battle with an unarmed man.

The problem with reality is a lack of background music.

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."

I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.

Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.

By the time a women realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she's wrong.

Drunkenly addressing pirates* "Come on then! Who wants some? Form an orderly line and I'll take you all one by one!! James Norrington

Jack Sparrow: My compass is unique!!
James Norrington: 'Unique' here having the meaning of 'Broken'.
Jack Sparrow: True enough!

James Norrington: A pistol with no additional shots nor powder, a comapss that doesn't point north...*pulls out sword* And I half expected it to be made of wood. You are, without a doubt, the worst pirate I have ever heard of.
Jack Sparrow: But, you HAVE heard of me!

"When in doubt, look intelligent." Garrison Keillor

"Of course I'm sane, when trees start talking to me, I don't talk back." Rincewind, Discworld Series

"Anybody remotely interesting is mad in some way." 7th Doctor

"Imagination is more important than knowledge." Albert Einstein

"Friendship's more lasting that love and more legal than stalking." Jane, Coupling

"We have to stay alive long enough to not get dead." Anthony DiNozzo

The goons in the tuxedos are armed! Murdock (The A-team)

Live today like it's your last day... but pay the bills and dress appropriately just in case it isn't. - Mrs. Luchini

You might call it stalking, I call it intense following.

A stranger stabs you in the front, a friend stabs you in the back, a boyfriend stabs you in the heart, but best friends just poke eachother with straws.

Life is like a piano. The white keys represent happiness and the black keys represent the sadness in between. But in the end, you'll realize the black keys make music too.

Humans: You're nothing more than an accidental byproduct of nature, existing on a tiny speck of dust, lost in a midless universe, and are doomed to perish forever in a reletively short time.

When all is lost, improvise!

When jumping is the sole option, you jump and make it work. Patton Burgress (Fablehaven)

But the only way of discovering the limits of possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible.

I have not failed I've only found 10,000 ways that won't work! Thomas Edison

Revenge: I don't threaten. I make promises.

My mind rebels at stagnation. Give me problems, give me work! Give me the most abtruse cryptogram or the most intricate analysis and I am in my own proper atmosphere. But I abhor the dull routine of existance. I crave for mental exaltation. Sherlock Holmes

Will- “You remind me of me.”
Ellie- “That can’t be good.”

Look at yourself, now look at me, now back to yourself, then back to me. Sadly you are NOT me. But, if you ditched that navy uniform and got yourself a bottle of rum you could act like me. Look down, now back up. Where are you? You are on a ship with a person your person could act like. What's in my hand? I've got a jar of dirt! Do you have a jar of dirt? I didn't think so. Therefor, I suggest you just follow along quietly and try not to do anything...stupid. (revised version of a comercial I saw...obviously a Jack Sparrow quote!)

When life gives you lemons, you make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it. When life gives you more, you throw them back, because really, who likes lemons? And when it gives you even more, squirt them in their eyes and see how much life likes lemons then.

A good friend will bail you out of jail. But a Best Friend will be sitting next to you saying "Let's do it again!"

When in doubt, make words up!

If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving isn't for you!

An idiot is a window washer on the 44th floor who steps back to admire their work.

Why be difficult, when with just a little more effort, you can be impossible?

Don't you dare tell me that the sky is the limit while there are footsteps on the moon!

I was going to take over the world but I got distracted by something sparkly.

WARNING- lost kids will be sold to the circus

I intend to live forever- so far so good

Some say the glass is half empty. Some say the glass is half full. I say "Are you gonna drink that?"

If you lend someone 20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

Once you've been in a mental institution, people are going to look at you funny.

The police never think it's an funny as you do.

Today I will be happier than a bird with a French fry.

I'm up to no good . . . want to join me?

I was so far behind, I thought I was in first.

I'm bored. If you value your sanity, you'll run away now.

Chaos . . . Panic . . . Yep! My work here is done!

It takes skill to trip over flat surfaces. (oh yeah, I gots skills . . .)

WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!! But it's ok. I have a helmet.

I'm nobody. Nobody is perfect, therefor, I am perfect!

Knowledge is power, power corrupts. Study hard, be evil.

Procrastinators unite! . . . . tomorrow.

To be honest with you, I'm a liar

I will stab you with a spork

If it weren't for law enforcement and physics, I'd be unstoppable!

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.

It is impossible to travel faster than the speed of light, and certainly not desirable, as one's hat keeps blowing off.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking that I think that you're thinking I'm thinking because if you think that I think what I think I'm thinking then we've got a problem.

I'm not crazy, my reality is just different than yours.

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.

A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.

There's too much blood in my caffeine system.

The world will end tomorrow (unless postponed by rain).

I'm smiling. This should scare you.

Intelligent doesn't have to mean educated. And Creative doesn't have to mean talented.

By the time you read this you've already read it.

Don't let your mind wander, it's far too small to be let out on its own.

I will defend, to your death, my right to my opinion.

A person who aims at nothing is sure to hit it.

Tact is for people who aren’t witty enough to use sarcasm.

Farewell, trusted friend. I’ll always be with you at your side. Looking over you, haunting you, probably wailing. Shawn Spencer

I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.

The only gracious way to accept an insult is to ignore it; if you can't ignore it, top it; if you can't top it, laugh at it; if you can't laugh at it, it's probably deserved. J. Russel Lynes

I wear a necklace, cause I wanna know when I'm upside down.

Dustin Farnum: "I've never been better! In the last act yesterday, I had the audience glued to their seats."
Oliver Herford: "How clever of you to think of it."

I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top. English professor, Ohio University

Common sense is not so common. Voltaire

Perhaps imagination is only intelligence having fun. George Scialabra

Insane: Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence. Ambrose Bierce

Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

If you're alone, I'll be your shadow. If you want to cry, I'll be your shoulder. If you want a hug, I'll be your pillow. If you need to be happy, I'll be your smile. But anytime you need a friend, I'll just be me.

There are big ships and small ships. But the best ship of all is friendship.

It is the friends you can call up at 4 a.m. that matter.

Are we not like two volumes of one book?

Only your real friends will tell you when your face is dirty.

Friends are the sailors who guide your rickety boat safely across the dangerous waters of life.

I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.

You get ideas from daydreaming. You get ideas from being bored. You get ideas all the time. The only difference between writers and other people is we notice when we're doing it. Neil Gaiman

Sanity is madness put to good uses. George Santayana

Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change.

I haven't lost my mind; I have a tape back-up somewhere.

No man is sane who does not know how to be insane on proper occasions.

When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained. Mark Twain

May the weight of your spoon forever tip over your pudding cup.

What's your biggest secret?
Cant tell. It wouldn’t be a secret anymore and then the answer wouldn’t be valid therefore there is no answer to this question. If there was an answer to this question it would most likely be floating about somewhere in the 7th dimension where sounds are visible.

"What's wrong with archeologists?"
"I'm a Time Traveler. I point and laugh at archeologists!" Dr. Who (10th Doctor)

HE is too skinny for words! You give him a hug, you get a papercut!! -Donna Noble

This is my timey wimey detecor! It goes DING When there's stuff! Dr. Who (10th Doctor)

My pants are squeaking...is that normal?! Padfoot

Laughing makes you live longer...unless you die laughing...hmmmm that could be a problem. Moony

Phil Davis: I think it's ridiculous, impossible, and insane!
Bob Wallace: Anything else?
Phil Davis: Yes, I wish I'd thought of it first.

Bob Wallace: I don't know what you see in this tall drink of charged water, but after you get to know him he's almost endurable.

Phil Davis: When what's left of you gets around to what's left to be gotten, what's left to be gotten won't be worth getting, whatever it is you've got left.
Bob Wallace: When I figure out what that means I'll come up with a crushing reply.

Semper Fi.

Lt. Gillette: "What, exactly, are we to be "keeping a sharp eye" for?"
Jack Sparrow: "Anything what could render this mission unsuccessful. Cannibals, savages, ferocious man-eating beasts... large moths... the French..."
(taken from the wonderful fanfic Some Sort of Misunderstanding written by Agent047!)

Lt. Gillette: "Just how far are we going?"
Jack Sparrow: "Far? Well, I suppose that would depend on your perspective, wouldn't it? Distance is such a relative measure, you know, so it really is difficult to say with any amount of certainty how far, exactly, we are, in fact, going."
James Norrington: "So, you don't know."
(Also taken from Some Sort of Misunderstanding.)

Jack Sparrow: "Who goes there?" *Pistol shot* "All clear!"
Lt. Gillette: "Yes, it's most providential that you were here to protect us from that innocent field mouse."
(Taken from Some Sort of Misunderstanding!Seriously people, if you haven't gotten the memo by now, GO READ THIS STORY! Savvy?)

Lt. Gillette: "Your broken compass is going to lead us to a place that you've never seen before?"
Jack Sparrow: "First of all, my compass is not, nor has it ever been, broken. And secondly, yes. Savvy? Leave me alone."
(Once again, taken from Some Sort of Misunderstanding.)

Jack Sparrow: "Commodore, do you trust me?"
James Norrington: "About as far as I could throw you."
Jack Sparrow: "Which is how far, exactly?"
James Norrington: "In prison, Mr. Sparrow."
(All of the aformentioned quotes from the equally aforementioned fanfic Some Soret of Misunderstanding, belong to the wonderful writer!)

Lt.Gillette: "Sparrow, do you realize that we could kill you now and fear no legal repercussions?"
Jack Sparrow: "Can't. They took all the weapons."
Lt. Gillette: "We could strangle you."
Jack Sparrow: "You wouldn't."
James Norrington:"Don't push your luck."
(The above quote ALSO belongs to Agent047 and her wonderful fanfic!)

I couldn't wait for success, so I went ahead without it.

All power corrupts, but we need electricity.

Creativity is the sudden cessation of stupidity.

If your ship doesn’t come in, swim out to meet it!

Be yourself – everyone else is taken.

I don't think there's a punch-line scheduled, is there?

Good morning, I see the assasins have failed!

"I have an invisible bruise! How does that happen!?"
"You ran into an invisible chair, duh." Daily Dialogue

When my friends start one of their "Edward vs. Jacob Wars" I just scream "Severus Snape!" And they all shut up.

Slinkey Escalator = Endless Fun!

Boy: "My brain hurts!!"
Friend: "What Brain!?"
Boy:"THE ROCKS IN MY HEAD. I LIKE TO PRETEND THEY'RE A BRAIN!"

''I have never seen a Burger King under construction. They just kind of show up''

Lt. Groves: "Gillette, you look like death."
Lt. Gillette: "You're not such a pretty sight yourself. But then, you never are."
Lt. Groves:"Working with you every day takes its toll."
Once again, from one of my most favoite fics, Some Sort of Misunderstanding!

"Private, what are you doing?"
"Evesdropping, sir. On a private officer's meeting."
"You should't be doing that! ...hear anything good?"
(From "Dreamer" comic! amazing work! _)

When in doubt, push random buttons!

There's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, it's usually an oncoming express train.

There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.

Slinky Escalator = Endless fun

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

I used to have superpowers, but then my therapist took them away.

Always take the time to smell the roses...and sooner or later you'll inhale a bee.

It's always darkest before dawn...so if you're gonna steal the neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

I can't write a poem! Poets use too many words! This guy wrote a TEN PAGED poem describing a VASE! I could describe this vase in... two words:
*Throws it on ground; it shatters.*
It's broken.

By all means continue destroying my possessions. I daresay I have too many. Dumbledore

Why is it when some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?

A rejected invention: Instant water! Just add water!

Don't ever attempt a staring contest with a brick wall, they cheat a lot.

“He who hesitates” always seems to be walking directly in front of me.

He’s not dead… he’s electroencephalographically challenged.

When people ask for advice, I say, “Use your best judgment,” which they clearly don’t have if they think I’m the right person to be asking.

It doesn’t matter what temperature the room is. It’s always room-temperature.

If it doesn’t fit, force it; if it breaks, it needed replacement anyway.

Sometimes, I pretend to be normal, but it gets boring. So I go back to being me.

There are two rules for success: 1.Never tell everything you know.

I may look calm, but in my head, Iv'e already killed you three times.

I typed in "me" on Google and got more than 10 million hits. I'm more famous than I thought!

We're friends. When you laugh, I laugh. When you cry, I cry. When you jump off a bridge, I get my boat and save your retarded self.

I dig, You dig, He dig, She dig, We dig, They dig... -It's not a very good poem, but It's very deep.

Some people just need a hug. Around their neck. With a rope.

I changed all my passwords to "incorrect", so that my computer just tells me when I forget.

You can't always control who walks into your life, but you can control which window you throw them out of.

I am not what I think I am. I am not what you think I am. I am what I think you think I am.

When life gives you one thousand reasons to cry, show life that you have one thousand reasons to SMILE.

"Look at this. What is it?"
"I'm surpised you've forgotten, My Lord."
"I haven't forgotten. It's a rhetorical question."
..."No. It's a potato."

"I always thought you weren't supposed to go down into the creepy dark tunnel, or jump into the mysterious hole that
randomly opened itself in front of you…" Kivi

Oh, your younglings don't know about me, do they? Pity. I always hoped to be a
scary bedtime story." - Pythios

Jareth: C'mon Erik. You agreed to the same rules as everyone else. Where's your sense of artistic integrity?
James: Vacationing in Guam with your sense of self preservation, apparently.

Gus: A lot of things were weird, Shawn, like your irrational fear of tassles!
Shawn: Irrational!? Gus, what purpose to tassles serve on shoes?!
Gus: I dunno-
Shawn: I do! It's EVIL!

A friend told me I was delusional. I almost fell off my unicorn.

Doors are for people with no imagination.

Life is too important to be taken seriously.

Our desitney is within us, you just have to be brave enough to see it.

If my mind can concieve it and my heart can believe it, then I know I can achieve it.

Every artist was first an ametuer.

Gus: Did you just throw a cordless phone into a tree?
Shawn: A mans life was in the balance, there wasn't really another option!
Gus: You're buying us a new phone, Shawn.

In youth we learn, in old age we understand.

It is unwise to be too sure of ones own wisdom.

Do not pity the dead, pity the living, and above all pity those who live without love. Dulmbeore

A simple "hi" could lead to a million things.

Before God we are all equally wise and equally foolish. Albert Einstein.

Logic will get you from A to B, but imagination will take you everywhere. Albert Einstein

To be inspired is great, to inspire is incredible.

Sometimes you have to stop thinking so much and just go where your heart tells you.

Art is the only way to run away without leaving home.

"I'm the Doctor. I'm a Time Lord. I'm from the planet Gallifrey in the contellation Kasterborous. I'm 903 years old and I'm the man who's gonna save your lives and all six billion people on the planet below. You got a problem with that? In that case, Allons-y!" The 11th Doctor

James: "What is in it for you?"
Jack: "I was always rooting for you mate."
James: "I do not believe you answered my question Mr. Sparrow. You say there is a way to bring Synnove back, yet there is no benefit in such an endeavour for you."
Jack: "Balthazar gets his daughter back, Soren gets his sister, you get Synnove back by your side, and we get to explore unknown territory. If there is one thing for certain about unknown territory it is that it always holds treasure."
Soren: "But it is unknown, so how can you know what is there?"
Jack: "Pirate!"
(From The Reclamation byt KeggyChaos!)

Norrington: "What were you shooting at?"
Jack: "The bloody pigeons! Think they own the place, well, I showed them. Nobody roosts on Captain Jack Sparrow!"
Gillette: "Birds?"
Norrington: "You were shooting at birds."
Jack: "Serves them right. Trying to take over this ship with their flapping and their feathers and their pointy little beaks, which, I might add, are sharper than they look. Tried to steal my hat, they did, and one had the nerve to sit right on top of my very head. So, in answer to your previous question, Commodore, yes, we are, in fact, under attack."
Norrington: "I must ask you, Mr. Sparrow, to exercise a bit more prudence in discharging your weapon."
Jack: "If your humble opinion does not find chasing away winged fiends a prudent use of discharging my weapon, then I suggest you find a new opinion, mate."
Norrington: "My humble opinion is that you should be in the brig. Lieutenant Gillette will escort you there before you cause any more trouble."
Jack: "I don't particularly like Lieutenant Gillette. Could I request a different escort?"
(From The Alliance byt Agent047)

When i was using "can", I was using it's secondary model form as a verbal modifier, asking for permission , as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher, you'd know that.

Copy and Paste:

If you ever become so obsessed with a book that you spend a whole day with your head in it and totally oblivious to the outside world copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "where to begin?"

If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you and/or your best friend is insane, copy and paste this into your profile.

10 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity. (I LOVE THIS :D)

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.
3. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
4. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds"
5. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
6. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
7. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."
8. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.
9. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
10. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity...Copy and Paste this into your profile!!!

If you believe in God and Jesus Christ His son... Then copy and past this on your profile. If you ignore him, in the Bible, Jesus says... "If you deny me before man, I will deny you before my father in Heaven..."

If you're in love with a character that doesn't even exist, copy this into your profile.

If you know a video game/book/movie character that needs to exist, copy and paste this into your profile.

The majority of POTC fangirls squee over only Jack or Will. If you squee over James Norrington in any way, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've ever seen a movie SO many times that you can quote it word for word. And you have at random moments; copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think of Gillette and Groves everytime you think of POTC4, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you don't have a boyfriend, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you talk so fast no one can understand you unless they try really hard and even then it's a struggle, copy this into your profile.

If you don't have a myspace and you don't want a myspace, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer.

If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

Pluto was declared no longer a planet on August 27, 2006, because it was "too small" and "off its orbit" for some scientists' likings. If you think Pluto should still be a planet, copy and paste this to your profile.

Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile.

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As Part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 2 letters shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments wil enkourage the removal of double leters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be droped from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German lik zey vunted in ze forst plas.

If zis mad yu smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.
Some of my friends actually took this seriously. If you had a good laugh or if you just think it's funny, copy and paste it into your profile, and pass it onto others who could have a good laugh.

BEST FRIENDS

FRIENDS: Lend you their umbrella
BEST FRIENDS: Take yours and say 'RUN RUN!'

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS:Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS:Would be sitting next to you saying "Man we're screwed up!"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Won’t tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when you’re not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your crap and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are temporary
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when the guy rejects you
BEST FRIENDS: Will call him saying "seven days"

FRIENDS:hides you from the cops.
BEST FRIENDS:is probably the reason they're after you in the first place...

FRIENDS:will go to a concert with you.
BEST FRIEND: will help you kidnap the band.

FRIENDS:will help you up when you fall.
BEST FRIENDS: will trip you again and/or sit on your back to keep you down.

FRIENDS: Will ask whats wrong
BEST FRIENDS: Will go to the person who made you sad with a shovel

FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter
BEST FRIENDS:Will re-post this!

If you have ever heard of National Talk Like a Pirate Day, copy this into your profile.

If you have not only heard of National Talk Like a Pirate Day, but you also walked around school telling people "Happy National Talk Like a Pirate Day!", which gets you strange looks, copy and paste this onto you profile.

If every time you hear the word rum, you automatically think of Captain Jack Sparrow, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you think Gillette and Groves should be brought back in Potc 5, copy and paste this into your profile.

85 percent of people who read Harry Potter think Luna Lovegood is crazy. If you are part of the 15 percent who thinks she rules, copy this into your profile.

If you stubbornly believe in dragons, elves, dwarves and what-not, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you daydream 24/7, copy this into your profile.

If you feel that classical music is AWESOME, but under appreciated by others, copy this.

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. After a good meal, they laid down for the night and went to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend. Holmes said: "Watson, look up and tell me what you see.”

Watson said: "I see a fantastic panorama of countless stars".

Holmes: "And what does that tell you?"

Watson pondered for a moment: "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Why? - What does it tell you, Holmes?"

Holmes was silent for a moment then spoke: "Someone has stolen our tent." (This is for those of us who think so hard that we miss the simple things in life. I'm guilty!! Are you?)

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile!

You know you're addicted to Pirates of the Caribbean when...

- You buy anything you see with PotC on it, even if the thing is completely useless.

- You drink rum even though you don't really like it!

- You don't just quote the movie, you regularly quote the deleted scenes and outtakes.

- You quote it without realizing it.

- You say "I'm disinclined to acquiesce your request" instead of 'no'.

- You correct people who forget to say Captain Jack Sparrow.

- You walk like Jack.

- You get really excited about 'Talk Like A Pirate Day'.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you've ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of it's effects post this in your profile.

If, for any particular reason, you have laughed during a movie that wasn't funny, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are insane, enjoying every second, and proud of it, copy this and paste it into your profile.

If you love rain, put this into your profile.

If you've met your not-blood related twin (in resemblance or personality), copy and paste this in your profile.

If you realize that copying and pasting things into your profile is pointless, yet you do it anyways, copy and paste this into your profile.

I'm that girl
The one that likes books more than boys.
The one who pretends not to be sad, just to make others happy
The one who always wonders what she did wrong
The one who writes to escape
The one who just wants to help
The one that really wants to make a difference
The one that sticks to her values
The one that refuses to believe that this is it
The one that will do anything to make a better tomorrow
The one who won't give in
The one who won't give up
-by linguisticsrock, Copy and Paste if you can relate to this.

YOU MAY BE OBSESSED WITH STAR WARS IF you understand any of this

you have painted or drawn a picture in which there are at least two suns in the sky.

you have ever insulted someone by calling them 'sleemo.'

you know how to write in Aurebesh

you have ever been surprised to open a refrigerator and find that the milk is not blue.

you have quoted lines from the Star Wars movies unintentionally

you wave you hand in front of you to open automatic doors

when an object was out of your reach, you have extended your hand toward it and expected it to come to you.

you have attempted to use a glowstick as a miniature weapon.

you address your teachers as "Master."

you have looked for Ewoks when entering a wooded area.

you refer to children as 'younglings,' elevators as 'turbolifts,' and bathrooms as 'refreshers.'

you've memorized the Jedi code.

your favourite book of the Bible is Luke.

If you are a MOVIE QUOTER, which means you go around quoting movies for fun, copy and paste this in your profile!

If you have ever forgotten what you were talking about in the middle of a sentence, copy and paste this into your profile.

If your one of the people who could perfectly understand Captain Jack Sparrow's confusing rants and when your friends all had confounded expressions on their faces you were like, 'well duh that made perfect sense.' Copy this into your profile.

If you go around singing "I've got a jar of diiiirt, I've got a jar of diiiirt, and guess what's in it!", copy and paste this to your profile.

If your computer has all three POTC soundtracks on it and you can name them by listening to them for less than ten seconds, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think Will is a whelp, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you're the kind of person who will burst out laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday copy and paste this into your profile

If you solemnly swear you are up to no good copy and paste this into your profile

If you have an annoying younger --or older-- sibling, please copy and paste this in your profile.

If you've ever seen a movie or a TV show so many times you can quote it word for word and you do at random times or when the moment seems to need a quote, even when whoever you are quoting it to doesn't understand it; put this in your profile.

If there are characters on a certain show/movie that you HATE BEYOND ALL REASON... copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hear the voices of characters in your head, put this onto your profile.

Copy and paste this into your profile, or else.

If you feel like poking someone right now, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, paste this into your profile.

If you have ever wanted to slap someone, but restrained yourself, congratulations and copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever suffered severe emotional stress from something completely fictional copy and paste this onto your profile.

Mental Hospital Phone Menu:

Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital!

Please select from the following options menu:

If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.

If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway.

If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.

If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.

If you have low self-esteem, please hang up our operators are too busy to talk with you.

If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever.

If you are blond, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up.

If you're on a mission to make the world's longest fanfiction profile, show the world I accept you as my rival by copy and pasting this on your profile.

If you get way to excited for books, movies, ect. to come out, copy this into your profile.

If you're impatient copy/paste this into your profile, but HURRY!!

If you are one of the few who can honestly say that you've never been to Myspace.com, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Some people like Dreamworks more than Pixar, and some people like Pixar more than Dreamworks. If you're one of those people who likes them both and think that arguing which one is better is silly, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like smiley faces, then copy this into your profile :D

30 of 100 kids go to college. the other 70 either drop out or don't have the proper skills to. If you are on of the 30 that KNOW that your going to college put this on your profile.

If you are one of the few that actually has any regard to the rules of FanFiction.Net, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have written an awesome story, but can never seem to finish it, copy this to your profile.

If you ever wished you could talk to animals or be an animal, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are on fanfiction.net for some other reason than writing pure romance fics or totally rearranging the original story because some slash romance story didn't happen, copy this and paste it onto your profile.

If you're weird, copy this into your profile.

If you have weird taste in anything, copy this into your profile.

If you're quiet a lot but you're ALSO really loud, copy this into your profile.

If you have strange dreams that never, ever make any sense whatsoever, put this into your profile.

.eliforp ruoy otni etsap dna ypoc ,sdrawkcab siht daer ot hguone trams era uoy fI

If you have ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile.

Fancy a challenge? Try this: I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! Tahts so cool! If you could read that put it in your profile!

"I walk, talk, eat and sleep on earth, but I live my life in a completely different world." If this sentance describes you, copy and paste on your profile.

- If you spend all your time wishing a fictional character was real, copy and paste this into your profile.

- If you think British men should still walk around in those amazing powdered wigs and fancy uniforms, copy and paste this into your profile!

- If you got teary-eyed in the movie theater when Gillette and Groves were murdered in On Stranger Tides, copy and paste this into your profile.

- If you resent the fact that the otherwise brilliant Jerry Bruckheimer and his crew find the Navy guys uncared for and disposable, then DOGGONE copy and paste this into your profile!

- If you've ever laughed for 10 minutes straight, copy and paste this onto your profile.

-If you are so cool that you actually read through all of these, copy this into your profile!!!

Fanfiction: Because 87% of all original endings stink. :P
Fanfiction: Because 95% of all plot twists are either predictable or stupid.
Fanfiction: Because my favorite characters always die. *sob, nods*
Fanfiction: Because sometimes evil deserves to win.
Fanfiction: Because sometimes authors just don't know which of their own characters go together best. *cough, cough*
Fanfiction: Because most authors aren't willing to write multiple versions of their stories just so we can see every possibility that arises. GRRM.
Fanfiction: Because all stories shouldn't have an ending; there should always be another adventure.
Fanfiction: Because sometimes there's no one your age and gender who you can relate to.
Fanfiction: Because sometimes you want to be in that story yourself.
Fanfiction: Because you have no other way to express the ideas in your head.

If you have a long bio/profile, and wish to hereby enhance the length of said autobiographical document, copy and paste this to aforementioned world wide web page to make said autobiographical document increase in length, number of words, interestingness, and other things which would be known as fun, copy and paste this piece of information to your said autobiographical document...