Sakura's a psychic, Naruto's a swordsman, and Sasuke is a wizard. Kakashi, meanwhile, is the unfortunate jounin assigned to train them. Get ready to see familiar personalities from these three. Can Konoha survive this trio? Can the world? Please read and review. truly, Christopher Scott: A Gentleman Thief

A place for odd story bits that drip out of my brain.

Crackfic, AU. The Third Hokage granted Uchiha Itachi's request to spare the Uchiha children, only to realize too late that they were all horrible devil children. Literally. Which may be why Naruto fits right in with the rest of the little monsters Sasuke's too busy raising to brood.

At the Chunin Exams, Naruto learns he has a rep in Mist. Tazuna really should stop drinking before he tells a story.

A missive to the Gotei 13 from Yamamoto.

AU: Itachi didn't kill the clan, instead he and his friends are teaching the next generation to drive them (and maybe the rest of Konoha) crazy. Won't that be fun?

When Hinata use the castration palm to defend Naruto and Ramen saves the world, you know you entered the world of randomness. Come! Rame won't be built in one day! And now with lemon !

Whitebeard is dead and even in the four blue seas pirate crews are rising up at every island to pursue One Piece in response to Newgate's last words... well, at least most of them are. A certain four crews couldn't care less about such matters as they have their own goals to fulfill. AotFS follows these crews through their respective blue seas prior to entering the Grand Line!

After he and his team have an accident with the Fountain of Youth, the now two year-old Naruto somehow manages to save the day. Melting Gaara's heart with his cuteness and inspiring others to do good and to defeat Orochimaru and the Akatsuki along the way

A challenge response to Akun50's 'Unique Power-Ups' thread on The Fanfiction Forum. Kakashi is about to have a very bad day. Team 7 centric. No longer a one-shot.

All ninja have issues, this is a well known fact. Some ninja have weirder or scarier than others. Some ninjas lust after things they'll never obtain, some ninjas raise dangerous animals, some ninjas just want people to stop being afraid of them. Some of the habits ninja get into start when they're young, as can be seen here: Inside the Minds of Ninjas. Oneshots Crackfics.

Growing up Naruto had two father figures: Teuchi of Ichiraku's Ramen and the Hokage. What if he had decided to emulate Teuchi rather than the Hokage?

The adventure continues! Ichigo and company have successfully rescued Rukia from Soul Society. All they want now is to relax. Yeah, like that's going to happen. As always, no plan survives first contact. Sequel to "Not Quite as Planned". Read that first or you'll be completely lost.

For those who wanted the Chicken Chapter from The Consequences of Drunken Experiments to become its own story. Things go off into left field and the Uchiha Massacre gets derailed when the giant chicken that an intoxicated Orochimaru created escapes and a young Naruto finds it.

And Start Your Very Own Secret Ninja Organization. Three months into Naruto's training trip Jiraiya must leave him behind to go to check on a situation in Iwa, leaving Naruto to his own devices. Naruto thinks everything he did makes perfect sense, Kiri thinks he is a cult leader and Tsunade thinks she doesn't get paid enough to deal with this. 100 drabbles format.

Four different people from four different time-lines travel to the past for various reasons, and end up in the same time-line upon which they wreak havoc. Follow the adventures of the "time traveling" Naruto, Kakashi, Jiraiya, and Tenzo.

Adopted with permission from Rorschach's Blot. Naruto sets out to retrieve his team's wayward sensei and comes back with...her?

Itachi must have been crazy, thinking he could curse Sasuke. No one falls in love with only one kiss! Unfortunately the curse is all too real as Sasuke discovers after and unfortunate incident with a certain annoying blond. Sasu/Naru YAOI WARNING LANGUAGE Possessive Perverted Sasuke in later chapters

Due to a moment of inattentiveness on his first C-Rank, Uchiha Itachi aged 7 loses the very individual he should be watching. Hopefully he can get his pint-sized diaper-clad charge back before anyone realizes that he's missing...Meanwhile, Uzumaki Naruto aged 2 is having the time of his life as he explores the world around him and makes friends with the Konoha wildlife.

"Naruto Uzumaki has left the village to form a cult, Hokage-sama." The Chunin said, and Hiruzen sighed. "Oh yes, I forgot to mention that his cult worships the nine Bijuu and their Jinchuriki, sir." AU, OOC, totally a Crack fic. T for possible language. Ch. 1-4 Rewritten.

After Izuna's adventure ends, he and Madara go to another world to search for the Sage of the Six Paths' hidden legacy. What they find is a cursed job, another branch of the family, and that they're stuck there for a year.

Most Hidden Villages have a person assigned to take care of their jinchuuriki. Konoha doesn't. Why? Maybe there's a reason.

A few hours can be the difference between the funny story about how your mother went into labor while shopping for biscuits and "Cleanup on aisle 7". A few hours can also lead to a different name and a different life as a result. Unfortunately for Tesco James Potter, there's a prophesy he has to fulfill before he can live as he wants to: Well away from any lunatic wizards.

It was a freak accident. A series of events joined together to achieve the impossible. Now Naruto, Sakura, and Sasuke are living their lives over and over again, with no end in sight. So they decided, be it a blessing or a curse, to make the most of the situation they find themselves in. They will live by their own rules and do whatever they want to do. This is their story.

Sasuke inadvertently imitates the First Hokage when he steals the Second Hokage's scroll of prank Jutsu from Naruto, and learns a jutsu that's "Guaranteed to stop any enemy in his tracks". Upon seeing it confuse the enemy, and not seeing how it does so, he uses it again and again... Short oneshots, not in chronological order.

Orochimaru creates something that never should have existed while under the influence... A series of unrelated oneshots.

Ino raises a very interesting point the day they announced the genin teams. Why are there always two boys and only one girl on every squad? Watch, as the futures of the rookie nine get changed forever by one little question! (Eventual Pairings)

The War for the Fake Karakura town has begun. Unfortunately the match ups got a bit mixed up, and now an entirely different set of fights are taking place. Do the Captains of Soul Society stand a chance against Aizen? Will the Espada match up to our expectations? Will we actually get a fulfilling conclusion to this story arc? Not if Tite Kubo has anything to say about it.

After the first four Hokages are mysteriously returned to life, Konoha has to deal with the fact that they now have five Hokages, amongst other things. AU in which a perpetually drunk Madara lives long enough to do his own dirty work in the lead-up to the 4th Shinobi World War and Hashirama and Tobirama's personalities got swapped.

Kakashi thought he knew what he was getting into when he arrived at the training ground that morning. But for some reason, it was decided that he'd thought wrong. So, what exactly is poor Kakashi supposed to do now? Rating subject to change and pairings undecided (though likely to have at least NaruHina)

(Most of) the story of America's founding 10,000 years ago.

Over the course of his life, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore has had many ideas that toed the line between brilliance and lunacy. That was his thing. But hiring Team Samui and their space case master to help in the fight against the Dark Lord? Well, that goes so far beyond crazy that, with a little effort and a lot of luck, it might just wrap right back around into genius.

The name, Team 7 is too boring for the flamboyant group of friends, Naruto Sasuke and Sakura. Poor Kakashi, he's going crazy because of his crazy students. Friendship fun ambition equals? Calculated chaos.

"Have you found out how to get past that beast of Hagrid's yet?" ...Snape kicks Harry out of 'Remedial Potions', but as we know from The Philosopher's Stone, there is another Occlumens in the school good enough to keep out the Dark Lord. Stupid oneshot.

Sakura finds as scroll with a jutsu that allows you to see who you were in your last life in the library. The results for Naruto were interesting to say the least.

Rewriting the Book of Dobby. Harry Potter has had enough, and now - with a little help from his friends - he's decided to bring the fight to the Death Eaters in a way they cannot understand. Turn out those lights! Don't you know there's a war on?

Episode 14: These are the Loops that never end...

Years after Pirate King Luffy's execution, a young Minkman hopes to find the Strawhat's legendary treasure. This is her story, told from the eyes of her navigator, running on borrowed time just like her. NotFirstPerson MForLimeLater SubmitYourCharacters