Why ...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Why ...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

Why ...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

Why ...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

Why . ...do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

EVER WONDER ...

Why the sun lightens our hair,
But darkens our skin ?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Why? Good question.

A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit
some friends one
evening
and time passed quickly as each shared
their
various experiences of the past year.

She ended up staying longer than
planned,
and
had to walk home alone. She wasn't
afraid
because it was a small town and she lived
only
a
few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm
trees,
Diane asked God to keep her safe from
harm
and
danger.

When she reached the alley, which was a
short
cut to her house, she decided to take it.

However, halfway down the alley she
noticed
a
man standing at the end as though he
were
waiting
for her.

She became uneasy and began to pray,
asking
for
God's protection.

Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness
and
security wrapped round her, she felt as
though
someone was walking with her.

When she reached the end of the alley,
she
walked right past the man and arrived
home
safely.

The following day, she read in the
newspaper
that
a young girl had been raped in the same
alley
just
twenty minutes after she had been there.

Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and
the
fact
that it could have been her, she began to
weep.

Thanking the Lord for her safety and to
help
this
young woman, she decided to go to the
police
station.

She felt she could recognize the man, so
she
told
them her story.

The police asked her if she would be
willing to
look
at a lineup to see if she could identify
him.

She agreed and immediately pointed out
the
man
she had seen in the alley the night
before.

When the man was told he had been
identified,
he
immediately broke down and confessed.

The officer thanked Diane for her bravery
and
asked if there was anything they could do
for
her.

She asked if they would ask the man one
question.

Diane was curious as to why he had not
attacked
her.

When the policeman asked him, he
answered, "Because she wasn't alone.
She
had
two tall men walking on either side of
her."

Amazingly, whether you believe or not,
you're
never alone. Did you know that 98 of
teenagers
will not stand up for God?

Repost this as Love vs. Sex if you truly
believe
in
God..

PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what... and if you stand up for him he will
stand up for you.
I bet 93 percent of you people that read this won't reposy

America's Intelligence:

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(And that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure?)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation..)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(But no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(Somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

50 THINGS YOU DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT ME UNTIL YOU READ THIS:

1, What color is your toothbrush?

Ummm... purple

2, Name one person who made you smile today:

Lady in a car that i thought was my mom's that I got in.

3, What were you doing at 8 am this morning:

Sitting in the auditorium at school waiting for the bell to ring

4, What were you doing 45 minutes ago?

Taking a shower

5, What is your favorite candy bar?

Kit Kat...or Hershey's...no... Kit Kat

6, Have you ever been to a strip club?

No, being a girl myself I don't really care about naked woman.

7, What is the last thing you said aloud?

"Shoot! I lost my phone again1" (Keep in mind that I had just found it 5 minutes before)

8, What is your favorite ice cream flavor?

Cookies and Cream!!

9, What was the last thing you had to drink?

Water, i just came from basketball practice

10, Do you like your wallet?

Of course I do! It's got money, check card, and my permit in there! Did I mention it's PRETTY?

11, What was the last thing you ate?

A Hotdog

12, Have you bought any new clothing items this week?

Not that I recall.

13, The last sporting event you watched?

Football

14, What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?

The White cheese stuff in the black bag at Walmart! i don't really remember what it's called

15, Who is the last person you sent a text message too?

Lindsey, asking her who it was

16, Ever go camping?

Yeah, I LOVE camping! Except when it's rainy and when you're face gets eaten off by bugs sitting on a rock near a tree on a waterfall

17, Do you take vitamins daily?

Yes, my dad kind of forces me.

18, Do you go to church every Sunday?

Most Sundays...

19, Do you have a tan?

I don't need one (Asian)

20,Do you prefer Chinese food over pizza?

Depends on what i feel like having

21, Do you drink your soda with a straw?

No, I don't feel it necessary to go spend extra time digging out a straw

22, What did your last text message say?

Finally found my phone!

23, What are you doing tomorrow?

Going to school-Economics, Weight training, interior design, musical appreciation, then i have to go to basketball practice

25, Look to your left, what do you see?

A bed that i should probably be in at the moment

26, What color is your watch?

Silver (present from parents last Christmas

27, What do you think of when you hear Australia?

Movie with Nicole Kidman and hugh jackman that i saw on this weekend and kinda wanted to go see

28, What is your birthstone?

Peridot (Had to look that up)

29, Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru?

I go in

30, What is your favorite number?

12

31, Who's the last person you talked to on the phone?

Chelsea asking her about this project for our World Lit class

32, Any plans today?

I went to school-Child Development, World Lit, Math, Biology

33, How many states have you lived in?

Three-New Jersey, Florida, Georgia

34, Biggest annoyance right now?

Stupid people!

35, Last song listened to?

Why-Rascal Flatts

36,Can you say the alphabet backwards?

No, I admit i tried for like 5 seconds when i was in like 3rd grade.

37, Do you have a maid service clean your house?

No. I don't believe in paying for something I can do myself.

38, Favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time?

Black Flats

39, Are you jealous of anyone?

yes, the freaking amazing basketball players on Varsity

40, Is anyone jealous of you?

I kinda get the feeling that they are sometimes, but i'm careful not to rub it in their face after that...(Well sometimes)

41, Do you love anyone?

Of course! Who doesn't?

42, Do any of your friends have children?

Nope, we're all about fifteen. No wait my neighbor who's like 20 something has a kid

43, What do you usually do during the day?

School. Basketball Practice, Homework (Wow... that's doesn't seem very interesting when it's put that way..)

44, Do you hate anyone that you know right now?

No I just passionately dislike them

45, Do you use the word 'hello' daily?

Only if I have to answer the phone, normal conversation I use the shorter words like Hey and occasionally hello or hi

46, What color is your car?

Invisible

47, Do you like cats?

They're ok. i have one, but i prefer dogs

48. Are you thinking about someone right now?

No, do I count?

49, Have you ever been to Six Flags?

yes about 3 or 4 times

50, How did you get your worst scar?

I don't really remember, but I was probably playing or running or something, and tripped.

DON'T DRINK WATER: fish have sex in it.

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.

Dain bramaged.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. But if the doctor is cute, feck the fruit.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but if the doctor is question is Carlisle Cullen, get those apples the hell away from me.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.

You can't make a person love you. You can only stalk them and hope for the best.

Come to the dark side. We have cookies.

I know Karate, Kung Fu, and 47 other dangerous words.

A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me. I'm afraid of widths.

"If something goes wrong, blame the guy who can't speak English." - Homer Simpson.

I'm so gangsta. I carry a squirt gun.

One night I looked up at the beautiful stars and began to think... where the HECK is my roof??

People are like SLINKIES. Basically useless. And yet it's so amusing to watch them fall down the stairs.

Smile... it makes people wonder what you're up to.

I'm smiling because they haven't found the bodies yet.

My heart? Yeah. It's not a playground.

Let's flip a coin: Heads, Edward and I will be together. Tails, we'll flip again.

Tears wash the windows of our souls so we can see ourselves more clearly. -Exodus 19:5

Oops! I appear to have fallen on your lips.

We fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But us teenage girls our good at one thing: Staying Strong.

Arguing with yourself is normal. It's when you argue with yourself and lose that's weird.

Sometimes I wonder, "Why is the frisbee getting bigger?" Then I get hit in the face.- that happens alot.

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you do criticize them, you're a mile away and have their shoes.

When life throws you lemons...OMG! You're pregnant!

Of course it's in the last place you look for it. Why in hell would you keep looking for it if you already found it?

When you get caught looking at him, just remember he was looking back.

I live in a world full of bunnies and unicorns. But those bunnies are cutting themselves and the unicorns are acting all emo again...

You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you fall off a cliff, I laugh even harder.

Whoever said "Nothing's impossible" never tried slamming a revolving door.

Silent is golden but duck tape is silver

Note to self: Normal is just a setting on washer machines.

You know it's a bad day when you fall out of bed and you miss the floor.

Behind every bitch there's a guy that made her that way.

Having the love of your life say "We can still be friends" is like having your dog die, and your mom say you can still keep it.

Dance like no one's watching. Sing like no one's listening.

You call me a bitch? Because a bitch is a dog. Dogs bark. Bark grows on trees. Trees are a part of nature. Nature is beautiful. I know I'm beautiful, thanks for noticing.

Sometimes you've got to smile and walk away... Hold your tears in and pretend like you're okay.

Being mature is overrated.

Being weird is like being normal, only better.

I see regular people!

I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me.

Anyone can reach the stars. If you can't reach them, catch one that falls.

Smile... it confuses people.

Labels are for cans, and in case you haven't noticed, I'm not a can!

Don't yawn in the shower. You might drown. -Bill Cosby

The dinosaur's extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide.

There's a ME in AWESOME but there's also a WE.

I was gifted but the psychiatrist took away my super powers.

Slinky + Escalator = Endless fun

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us how to walk and talk, then the rest of our lives telling us to sit down and shut up.

Palm Reader: -gasp- "You're going to die. But don't worry, you'll live through it."

Therapist = The/rapist (scary thought -shudder-)

Excuse me. Have you seen my sanity? I think I've lost it...

I used to care, but I take a pill for that now.

I call you squishy and you shall be mine. You will be my squishy! -Dory from Finding Nemo

One out of four people are insane. Look at three of your friends. If it's not them, it's you.

They say, "Guns don't kill people. People kill people." Well, I think the gun helps. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

One day we're going to look back at this, laugh nervously, then change the subject.

If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, then why practice?

Isn't it funny that the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures'?

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip 'n slide.

I don't obsess, I think intensely.

Evening news is where they say, "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it's not.

The light you see at the end of the tunnel is the headlight of a fast approaching train.

You know, there are times when we're dirt broke, hungry and freezing, and I ask myself, "why the hell am i still living here." and then they call and i remember.

Someone should sue Disney for making every little girl believe shes found her prince charming.

Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask myself, “Is life multiple choice questions or true or false questions?” and then a voice inside my head says, “We hate to tell you this, but life’s a 1,000 word essay.

Sunglasses are in the two splash category. The first splash is the sunglasses falling into the water. The second splash is you jumping in after them.

Life is like a box of chocolates, don't eat them too fast.

Life is like a roll of toilet paper, the closer you get to the end, the faster it goes.

Is he gay or European?

Music man took my soul...

Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun!

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.

Men are like slinkies. They bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs.

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance that little indestructible black box is?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
So what's the speed of dark?
How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a Train stops On my desk, I have a work station..
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
Should women put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans?
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do . . . write to these men?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
Why can't you find fresh sardines in the fish market?
Why do so many old people eat at cafeterias?
Why does an "X" stand for a kiss?
Why does the word "Filipino" start with the letter F ?
Why are the copyright dates on movies and television shows written in Roman numbers?

The greatest lies are the ones we tell ourselves.