A collection of (hopefully) humourous drabbles featuring Lily and James - as requested by friends and followers.

He could shut out every bit of him that recognized her, but the most primitive part of him still did. That was the problem. She went too deep. It was all too easy to be cruel, and to hate her – but to forget her? To forget she was in the room? That was the part that still felt impossible. AU, DHr. WIP

This is a story about something that happened quite a while ago when your parents were still teenagers. As a matter of fact, this story happens to be about a pair of teenagers who would be parents, were they still alive... James/Lily.

"James looked at her and she felt like her skin had suddenly caught fire. 'It's got one hundred percent, absolutely nothing to do with your essay.'": Featuring professor!James, student!Lily, and both parties' abandonment of better judgment. L/J. AU smut edition.

An all human AU set in a boarding school just five miles outside of the quaint town of East Summers. Where familiar faces come together and friendship, rivalry, jealousy, and a 50s style diner ensures that the next two years are far from relaxing. A high school story (hopefully) with a difference. (all of the seven feature but only lets me add 4 characters *sigh*)

Their love story would eventually shape the future of their kind, but these kinds of things tend to take their time.

A series of quick, unrelated drabbles surrounding everyone's favourite couple. L/J.

"An invisible red string connects those who are destined to meet regardless of time, place, or circumstance. The string may stretch or tangle, but it will never break" James and Lily haven't always been on the best of terms, and after an unfortunate incident in their fifth year, it seems as if they will never even be friendly. We know differently however. Canon-compliant.

It may have taken him a while to get to this point, but James Potter is happy with his life; as the captain of the pirate ship Fawkes, no-one tells him what to do or where to go. But when he agrees to carry a passenger - for a fee, of course - his life takes a rather interesting and wholly unexpected turn, and the past may be about to catch up with him. Jily AU, cover art by Viria.

She'd come without a date, dressed as Sandra D, and the owner of the bloody house, the host of the party she was attending, perhaps uninvited, the unfairly fit bloke staring down at her, was actually dressed as her fictional boyfriend. Danny bleeding Zuko. He was really, really fit. Based on a headcanon by comealongraggedypond. Thanks, Jess!

"Stiles, you can't live with Lydia! You're gonna start feeling stuff again, and one day she's going to bring a guy home and you're gonna be jealous and try to kiss her to prove your love and then, that's it. You're alone and homeless." Stiles considers this. Then he shrugs. "Nah," he says, waving a hand dismissively. "I think it's gonna be fine."

"Percy," she murmurs, threading her fingers through his untidy black hair, which is longer than usual. He may be the heir to his own kingdom, but there's nothing about him that seems regal yet. Percy Jackson is still a boy. Her boy.

Princess Diaries AU. When Percy finds out he's a prince, it kind of hard for him to believe. Future king of Olympia? Yeah, right. Tell it to the orderlies at the loony bin. He doesn't have the looks, the vocabulary, the money - he's probably the furthest thing from royal. But with guts and some help from his pretty bodyguard, he'll find a way to make it happen.

In which Academy Award winner Lily Evans discovers the periphery of internet fandom and the existence of Prince James's gold star system.

Lily Evans is planning on seeing the New Year in alone, then just getting through the rest of the year with as few problems as possible. Unfortunately for Lily Evans, very little in her life is that simple. Still, what difference can a year make? 1977 through the eyes of L & J. Cover art by Viria. All Harry Potter characters, places etc are the property of JK Rowling.

Lily and James exchange letters throughout their summer. Madness ensues. Set in the summer before seventh year. L/J.

AU - a mash of The Little Mermaid and Percy Jackson. Not quite as stupid as it sounds. [canon couples]

Annabeth's the girl who hardly ever loses a race, and Percy's the new kid who doesn't have time for track team. It's a love story waiting to happen. AU.

She knew him in Hogwarts; wildly popular, overly confident and a massive flirt. Honestly, she'd never expect to see him again when he left school but now he's back and, oh goodness... he's going to be working side by side with her now, isn't he? L/J. Slightly AU-ish.

Modern AU Jily/Marauders: In which there is no war, Lily is a Muggle, and the Marauders set up a bakery. Cover art by viria.

"Between you and me, love, the kitchen is more of a boy's club." Lily applies to be a cook at a cafe Severus works at, but is hired as a waitress instead while two inexperienced gits get her job. James/Lily Muggle Restaurant AU. Warning for Very Strong Sexist Language.

Lily Evans is excited to get her big break: a companion on Doctor Who. That is, until she realizes how unbearable her co-actor is. On hiatus.

Lily intended to spend one night on James's pirate ship and leave with her purse a bit heavier. Now she's stuck on board, which might be less annoying if she could figure out where they were bloody going, if half the crew didn't suspect her of sabotage, and if she weren't falling for the captain. And why on earth is his cat wearing an eye patch?

AU. Oneshot. Lily is fond of laser tag, but when the Marauders find out she has no one to play with, they invite themselves along to a game.

Over the course of their life together, Percy and Annabeth Jackson share many different types of Fridays.

Lily is dreading spending New Year's Eve at a family party - and seeing in the new year with her sister's vile fiancé. Fortunately, James is quite adept at taking matters into his own hands.

And as she watched his back, she realized that this was one of the very best feelings in the world. But there were so many. Especially when it concerned him. This boy she met at eleven and fell in love with at seventeen.

When Remus falls ill just as the Christmas trees are due to be decorated at Hogwarts, James steps in to help Lily. Fluttery feelings abound.

War. Terrible war. England burned to the ground – he has won. The world belongs to him now – to the solely Lord of magic – and to him alone. The nation he has divided in four estates; four districts, each separated by three sectors. To prevent a further rebellion, he created what would be later known as - The Menial Games.

It's the holidays and Hermione Granger, usually not much of a drinker, stocks up her liquor cabinet. Draco Malfoy uncharacteristically makes a grand gesture. And someone falls off a roof. Written for DHr Advent 2013. Inspired by Bridget Jones's Diary. One-shot. DM/HG.

"If you must know, I heard a rumor that a pretty girl was going to be here." "Oh. And?" "The gossips were wrong, of course, as per usual." James surprises Lily with an unexpected visit to a Slug Club party.

Marauders Era Jily/Hunger Games AU. Voldemort has already taken over Hogwarts, where he still allows muggleborns to attend - provided they are entered into a competition forcing them to fight to the death.

In order to appease his mother - and escape the clutches of Octavia Talbot - James must request the help of the one person who would never do him a favour ... or would she?

She was dramatic. He was dynamic. She was precise. He was impulsive. He was James, and she was Lily, and one day they shared a kiss, but before that they shared many arguments, for he was cocky, and she was sweet, and matters of the heart require time.

Lily has always considered herself ordinary. But as she enters her 7th year, things start changing and Lily starts going a bit mad. Suddenly, she's Head Girl, her mates are acting strangely, and there's a new James Potter she can't seem to get rid of. PRE-HBP

"You're a diamond, Lily, you can't be broken." He is wrong, because diamonds can be broken by other diamonds. James/Lily, one-shot.

Being a college student leaves precious little time for the fun stuff. A tale of shameless flirting, cuddling, and strange uses of the shower wall.

Lily Evans' and James Potter's relationship has always been a complicated story; it's just about to get a lot more complicated. And so is everything else. They might not know each other well, but they're about to know each other a lot better. Cover art by anxiouspineapples.

Even when everything is going wrong, sometimes you can find that one person who is absolutely right. (Jily Muggle AU)

Neither Prince James nor barmaid Lily had any interest in running the Kingdom of Gryffindor. This is the story of how they changed their minds.

Percy has been through many Camp Half-Blood t-shirts in his lifetime. Every one has its own story to tell. / T for swearing.

Snippets of Hermione's life before Hogwarts.

It was the utter Jamesness of the afternoon which made Lily realise that she was tired of waiting, tired of making the second move; tired of letting time take its course. LJ oneshot

"A scrap of paper escapes her and flutters to the floor. As she leans beneath the table to reach for it, she spots something else – another bit of parchment, folded and worn." L/J – oneshot.

Lily and James define "friendship" rather differently. Jily oneshot, with a Remus cameo!

The direction of a life can be changed by the simplest things.

LilyJames one-shot. They all expect her to push him away or tell him to get a life, but his arm is warm and reassuring against her back. She compromises.

LilyJames. Lily won't admit to anything, even to her dormitory ceiling.

James was vaguely aware that the sky outside his window produced a bright crimson. He could have thought of blood. He could have thought of the fate right before him. His last thought, at the end, was of Lily's smile.

As N.E.W.T.s quickly approach, Lily Evans struggles with her once-perfect Boggart spell, while James Potter cannot seem to master the Patronus Charm. A strange journey through a long-lost room within the castle guides the two Heads through their troubles, leading them to an unexpected end where they find much more than the ability to master their magic.

"His name was Terrence Hunter, muggle-born and all kinds of perfect, but Lily couldn't help but note the lack of callouses on his fingers, the way his brown curls crowned his kind face a little too immaculately, the way his eyes were of the wrong hue…how there wasn't a pair of spectacles for her to remove before he leaned in to kiss her." Three-shot. JPLE.

In the small town of Olympus, two high schools fight over who has the best athletes, brains and artists. For decades, their rivalry has reached extreme levels of intolerance and even violence. However, things start to change when the mayor's wife, for her own gain, decides to exchange some students. A High School/Human AU where things actually make sense![Canon pairings/Leyna].

"Despite her abject dislike for him and two-thirds of his friends, her friends had solicited the Marauders to orchestrate Lily Evans' seventeenth birthday party, and the results were… Well, brilliant, if he did say so himself." One-shot.

AU. if a certain person doesn't hear a prophecy, does it still come true?

James's first Quidditch match as captain does not go as planned.

L/J. It doesn't surprise her at all that James Potter comes rushing into the Hospital Wing only an hour after she lands herself there. And for someone she doesn't even like all that much, she's still glad to see him.

Lily Evans' relationship with James Potter is anything if not colorful. She can't help but watch as he makes his way into her heart, decorating her life with the promise of vibrant shades and hues. L/J. Read and review, please?

A one-shot to honor Lily and James's tragically short life.

James poses as an advice charm in Lily's diary. He's really got to start thinking through his shenanigans.

The story of a Golden Snitch and two people in love.

"Mum!" James snapped, apparently on the verge of hysteria. Running his fingers through his hair he looked down at his smug mother with wide eyes. "Y-You...What did I tell you about talking to Hogwarts students? And, oh God, you had to talk to Lily!"

"It's kill or be killed.' I remind myself. But as I look down at the sleeping redhead, the realisation hits me. I cannot, and will not, kill someone that I'm in love with." AU: James and Lily, in separate districts, are reaped for The Hunger Games.

Contrary to popular belief, it's not always the man who does all the chasing.

He did not wish her a happy birthday, and when she stared him down until he made eye contact with her, he only flashed her a small smile and turned away. This was proving to be the worst birthday ever.

"I can't stand you, Granger. Every second I'm with you is like pure, agonizing torture. But I have to save you. Do you understand?" Draco/Hermione.

Lily muses on just why James Potter's hair should be used as incriminating evidence against him in a court of law. And perhaps does a bit more than muse. L/J drabble

James and Lily share a moment on the bench outside Honeydukes as they wait for their mates to join them.

I anticipated the question, as I had since fourth year, and interrupted him before he could even start, still adamant that I would not ever date a git like Potter. I couldn't help the smile that crept onto my face. "Not on your life, Potter."

This is a story about two people who bonded over coffee, became friends, broke each other's hearts and tried to deal with the aftermath.

In which much Jägermeister is consumed, Severus passes out, and Lily meets the maybe guy of her dreams. James/Lily; CambridgeUni!AU.

He's being a pansy. He should be kissing her. He should have snogged her senseless the moment they set foot in his dormitory. Really, she should be lying naked underneath him, writhing and screaming his name at the top of her lungs.

"And I think since I'm an attractive toerag, you're a very pretty cow. The loveliest cow I've ever seen. Except you don't have black spots." Fun oneshot. R&R?

It seemed to take an age for them to realise. LilyxJames.

"It makes her feel more steady even though the ground beneath her turns. She worries, though. She's always been a worrier." L/J.

"All right, fine. Tell me what it would take for you to go out with me." "A miracle." L/J one-shot

ONE-SHOT. James Potter had never been one to second guess himself or hesitate when it came to girls. If it was any other bird, then he would have asked her to dance... but she was Lily Evans and she really messed him up.

Because Lily Evans is most definitely not boring, and James Potter is most definitely a complete idiot.

The Three Broomsticks is the setting for five significant scenes in Lily and James's relationship.

For six summers, Lily's parents hear all about that Potter boy. Then comes the seventh.

"Bring – me – back – my – tart!" - In which Lily requires pudding, and James provides. L/J

Lily Evans needs a minute to figure something out - and it's a little hard to think straight around James Potter. L/J one-shot.

It started out as a simple quest - he wanted to see her smile again. That alarmingly beautiful, incandescent smile. But over time, it turned into something more. An L/J one-shot.

When Lorelai inadvertently befriends Tristan, Rory's life becomes infinitely more complicated. Set at the end of the summer following the Season One finale. [Trory]

You blush when you see her hand slip into his pants. JPLE Main , One-Shot.

“Are you coming?” James demanded. Lily raked her eyes over him with marked disinterest and rolled her eyes. “No.”' 7 years at Hogwarts, 7 years of Quidditch, 7 questions asked and only 6 refusals? Fluffy LJ oneshot.

Percy’s not the only one who has someone they love come to them in a time of need. Set during The Titan’s Curse. Percy/Annabeth.

As if Slughorn wasn't bad enough already, now you'll never be able to see him again without spontaneously combusting from shame.

When tragedy hits, it's no wonder that she's the one standing beside him, ready and willing to fulfill a promise neither ever forgot. The surprise instead comes in the realization that the love they shared was one that had not altered despite the heartach

Spell engineering has never been so complicated than when an afternoon of trying and trialing leaves James and Lily in an interesting position. LJ-oneshot.

A list.

LJ. “Prolong every single movement; like you’ve learned to do with so much else, make every second count.” T, just to be safe. R&R?

When Lily Evans sits next to a pot of amortentia in potions, she can't help but admit her feelings for a certain head boy. Now, how does she find out if he still feels the same way about her? L/J

When your boyfriend doesn't turn up for breakfast, forgets to walk you to Potions, practically ignores you in said Potions lesson and then makes up pathetic excuses to get out of spending time with you you know something's wrong. JL

Lily and James: their epic as the fanfiction authors love to tell it. In a nutshell.

It was the little things she took notice of in the beginning, how her stomach seemed to clench when she saw him talking to other girls, how she blushed slightly whenever he paid her a compliment. Then, she knew she was doomed. Oneshot. LilyJames.

COMPLETE! One date, that was it. Just one date to pacify Potter’s insane desire to go out with her. But things are never easy for Lily Evans.

So, by now you have read a fic entitled 'I Was Called Mary Once'. Had you been pondering how we got there? Hmm... maybe you should read this prequel! Read and Review!

Lily Evans has been distracted lately…and it’s all because of James Potter and his stupid, unbuttoned shirt. Hardly any fluff, but plenty of shirtless James for everybody. Seventh year fic.

You will do well to note that these are probably the most historically important and perfect documents you will ever enounter. I graciously allow you to join me as I prank, babble and blither my way through school. I am Sirius Black and I am sexy.

Maybe my bunny slipper is being held for ransom! I can see someone like Pansy using my most capacious weakness against me in order to receive artificial love to satisfy her girly lusts!

Oneshot Nine moments in the lives of Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger. Tie in a little mythology, sprinkle with angst and romance, and step back. 8/15/08: CURRENTLY NOMINATED AT THE QUIBBLER AWARDS!

Can James Potter, Marauder and troublemaker extraordinaire, ever convince Lily Evans, Prefect and good girl, that they were meant to be? Now complete!

In her seventh and final year at Hogwarts, Lily Evans finds herself facing a tragedy that leaves her life in pieces. She ultimately finds great strength both within herself and those she never would have expected. FINAL CHAPTER UP July 8 05!

Torn apart as realization dawns upon the Gryffindor Golden girl, a potions class goes awry and she is transported back into the medieval times with none other than the not so despicable Draco Malfoy. Bitter sweet DHr. Side G?. Complete

Narcissa watching Draco watch Hermione. She draws some very startling conclusions. One Shot. Complete.

One shot. Here, read this speech. I went through a lot of pains to get it. It belongs to a certain best man, who read it at a certain wedding. LJ

Vernon loved normalcy almost as much as you did and these people were not normal. He hated them, but then again, you hated them more. [One-shot.]

In which Sirius finds a howto guide, truths are discovered, and James and Lily are unwitting pawns in the game of love. COMPLETE

Hermione's mother is pressuring her into finding a boyfriend. On a whim, she applies and is accepted into the wizard version of The Bachelor. But what happens when The Bachelor is none other than Draco Malfoy himself? Funny fic! COMPLETE!

An innocent walk to the common room is the trigger for a reassessment of feelings, as Lily Evans begins to realise that there is more to her maddening suitor Potter than meets the eye.

This is a Draco/Hermione fic. Basically, they're forced together for a class project and things take off from there. It's awfully long. **FINISHED!!!!!**

5 years later, Tristan and Rory finally met for the first time since that night. They have grown up, graduated from university, and shoved the events of that night to the back of their heads. But did they really forget? [w/ epilogue!]

The Daily Prophet has introduced a new opinion column to replace Rita Skeeter's. Minister Fudge claims it's just a publicity stunt, but many have already written to You-Know-Who for all kinds of advice.