If you've ever been called "Socially Stupid," copy and paste this into your profile. In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods. Comments in parentheses by Bellykid5 Comments in regular writing by Me

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (But that's the best time to dry my hair...)

On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (No purchase necessary!? No wonder America's overweight...)Encouraging Shoplifting

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (I thought you used it like irregular soap!)and how do you do that

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But... Remember guys it's only a suggestion. My Uncle Larry personally likes it frozen.)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Whoops.)A bit to late

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (Really?? I wasn't sure...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (That would explain the irregularly high medical bills...)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (That's right. Kids need to stop driving and working machinery already.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (You don't say!)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (That makes me wonder what else I could use it for...)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (And that would be...)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (You don't say!)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Who's the person that asked for directions...)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (Alright, what idiot sued for THAT!?))

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (Oops. Guess my neighbor's new nickname is Stumpy.)

On a hair straightener: "Do not use in water." (Yeah, I really want to straighten my hair while I'm washing it!!!)

On a package of pasta after the cooking instructions: "Put on fork and eat." (...I thought you used a spoon...)

On a can of bug spray:“Harmful to bees”. (NOOO NOT THE BEES! *breaks down and cries*)

On a life-saving device: “This is not a life-saving device”. (*facepalm*)

On a TV remote control: “Not dish washer safe”. (So that's why it won't work anymore...)

A New Zealand insect spray "Not tested on animals." (*facedesk*)

A Television Owner’s Manual "Do not pour liquids into your television set." (People really get payed for writing this??)

A VCR box says "Instructional video on hooking up your VCR included. (*BATMAN FACEPALM; when something is so stupid a normal facepalm just doesn't work.

A can of self-defense pepper spray "May irritate eyes." (Well, that's just a big plain DUH)

A can of windscreen de-icing spray "Spray works in sub-zero temperatures." (That helps a lot)

A cardboard sunshield that keeps sun off the dashboard "Do not drive with sunshield in place." (How else do I get the sun out of my eyes!)

A cartridge for a laser printer "Do not eat toner." (But.. It tastes so good with cheese)

A computer mouse "Do not dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at co-workers." (Up! Sorry guys, we need a new weapon.)

A container of underarm deodorant "Caution: Do not spray in eyes." (Amazing.)

A dishwasher carries this warning "Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher." (Oh...Sorry kids you need to find a new play-pen)

A popular manufactured fireplace log "Caution - Risk of Fire." (What's it supposed to do...play music?)

A rubber ball toy "Choking hazard: This toy is a small ball." (Really? I thought it was a puppy.)

A sharpening stone "Knives are sharp." (Really!) No I thought they were dull

A snowblower warns "Do not use snowthrower on roof." (And how exactly am I supposed to get a snowthrower on the roof?)

A baby stroller "Remove child before folding." (Oh. Better go get little Bobby out...)

A pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists "Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover." (Darn. Better go buy a helmet.)

An electric router made for carpenters "This product not intended for use as a dental drill." (Shoot. There goes my quick fix to this cavity.)

An "Aim-n-Flame" fireplace lighter "Do not use near fire, flame or sparks." (Okay... then how am I suppose to use it?)

A rock garden "Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth." (Well, time to get a new after school snack.)

A Fruit Roll-Up snack "Remove plastic before eating." (That's why it doesn't taste good...)

On a bag of Marshmellows: "Flammable" (Really? I thought they were fire resistant...oops...)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity copy and paste this into your profile! XD

The girl you just called fat? She is overdosing on diet pills. The girl you just called ugly? She spends hours putting makeup on hoping people will like her. The boy you just tripped? He is abused enough at home. See that man with the ugly scars? He fought for his country. That guy you just made fun of for crying? His mother is dying. Put this as you're profile if you're against bullying. I bet 95% of you wont put this on your profile, but I'm sure the people with a heart and backbone will.

A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it.

If you've ever started reading FanFiction from the moment you come home from school at four until 4 am when your mother threatens to donate your computer to a charity shop, copy and paste this on to your profile.

If you have ever yelled at the book you were reading because the characters did something stupid post this on your profile

If you've ever run into something big and obvious in public, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.

Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If Fanfiction is your way of escaping reality and the rest of the boring people in the world and truly "unleashing your imagination" then paste this in your profile and add your name: Emerald Princess 14, StardustFromThePlanetGallifrey, NarnianLady, KingdomHeartsNerd, Lady Alice101, TheOnlyMarauderette, GodofAWSOMEstuff, Katerina Riley, randomfanfictioner01, Bellykid5, ScareCrowPrincess

If you like singing songs at random points in the day, copy this into your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile. (my friends think I am weird 4 this one)

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

If Justin Bieber went missing, 97% of people would search 2% would cry and if you are the 1% poking your new prisoner with a sharp stick then copy and paste this into your profile.

Girl Comebacks
Man: Where have you been all my life? Woman: Hiding from you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine? Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living? Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign? Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning? Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple. Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the ends of the world for you. Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy. Woman: If I could see you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put u and i together. Woman: Really? I'd put f and u together.
Man: Your eyes, they're amazing. Woman: Seeing your back would be pretty amazing.
Man: Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? Woman: About as much as when you got kicked out of Hell.
Girls, copy and paste this on your profile!

That boy you punched in the hall today? Committed suicide a few minutes ago.

That girl you called a slut today? She's a virgin.

The boy you called lame? He has to work every night to support his family.

That girl you pushed down the stairs the other day? She's already being abused at home.

That girl you called fat? She's starving herself.

The old man you made fun of cause of his ugly scars? He fought for our country.

The boy you made fun of for crying? His mother is dying.

You think you know them. Guess what? You don't! Re-post if you are against bullying. I bet 99% of you won't, but re-post this if you are the 1% with a heart

Pairings I support

Horatio/Calligh

10,11,12/Evy/Luna

Amy/Rory

Percabeth

Nicosion

Jack/Gwen

Owen/Tosh

Ianto/Lisa

Rose/Meta-Crisis Doctor

Tobison

Sherlock/Me

Rhys/No-one Ha Loser

10/Marcella

Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school,

He told his friends that it was cool,

And when he pulled the trigger back,

It shot with a great, huge crack.

Mommy, I was a good girl, I did what I was told,

I went to school, I got straight A's, I even got the gold!

When I went to school that day,

I never said good-bye.

I'm sorry that I had to go, But Mommy, please don't cry.

When Johnny shot the gun, he hit me and another,

And all because Johnny, got the gun from his brother.

Mommy, please tell Daddy; That I love him very much,

And please tell Zack; my boyfriend; That it wasn't just a crush.

And tell my little sister; That she is the only one now, And tell my dear sweet grandmother; I'll be waiting for her now

And tell my wonderful friends; That they always were the best

Mommy, I'm not the first, I'm no better than the rest

Mommy, tell my teachers; I won't show up for class,

And never to forget this, And please don't let this pass

Mommy, why'd it have to be me? No one, though. deserves this.

But mommy, it's not fair, I left without a kiss.

I think I even saw one doctor, trying not to cry.

Mommy, I'm slowly dying, with a bullet in my chest,

But Mommy please remember, I'm in heaven with the rest

When I heard that great, big crack, I ran as fast as I could

please listen to me if you would,

I wanted to go to college, I wanted to try things that were new

I guess I'm not going with Daddy, On that trip to the new zoo I wanted to get married, I wanted to have a kid,

I wanted to be an actress, I really wanted to live.

But Mommy I must go now, The time is getting late, Mommy, tell my Zack, I'm sorry I to cancel the date. I love you Mommy, I always have, I know you know its true

And Mommy all I need to say is, "Mommy, I love you"

In Memory of The Columbine & Virginia Tech
Students Who Were Lost

Please if you would,
Don't smash this on the ground.

If you pass this on,

Maybe people will cry,

Just keep this in your heart,

For the people who didn't get to say "Good-bye".

Now you have 2 choices,

1) Pass this on, and show people you care, repost as
"Try Not To Cry"
2) Don't send it, and you have just proven how
cold-hearted you really are...

For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.) i'm other things on this list, i choose not to give the information.

I'm SMART so I MUST be bad at sports

I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST hate men
I'm a FEMINIST so I MUST be crazy (I personally prefer to be called an equal opportunist)
I DON'T LOOK IN THE MIRROR EVERY TIME I USE THE BATHROOM so I MUST not care what I look like
I LOOK IN THE MIRROR EVERY TIME I USE THE BATHROOM so I MUST be vain and shallow
I EAT ORGANIC so I MUST be a vegetarian
I'm a VEGETARIAN so I MUST be a tree-hugging hippe and I MUST think all meat-eaters should be shot
I'm an ATHEIST so I must be anti-Christian
I SUPPORT HILLARY CLINTON so I MUST be a whiny bitch
I have ASPERGER'S SYNDROME so I MUST be a self-centered retard
I have a MENTAL DISORDER so I MUST be a criminal
I am SKINNY so I MUST be annorexic
I'm BLACK so I MUST carry a gun
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed
I'm HATIAN so I MUST eat cat
I'm ASIAN so I MUST be sexy
I'm JEWISH so I MUST be greedy
I'm BISEXUAL so I MUST want to sleep with everyone I see
I'm GAY so I MUST have AIDS
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST have a sex tape
I'm an ARAB so I MUST be a terrorist
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER so I WILL go to hell
I'm a CHRISTIAN so I MUST be a homophobe
I'm RELIGIOUS so I MUST shove my beliefs down everyone's throat
I'm REPUBLICAN so I MUST hate poor people
I'm IN MIDDLE SCHOOL so I MUST be immature
I am LIBERAL so I MUST be gay
I am LIBERAL so I MUST think all conservatives should be shot
I'm a DEMOCRAT so I MUST hate Republicans
I TAKE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS so I MUST be emo
I TAKE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS so I MUST be crazy
I'm a GUY so I MUST only want to get into your pants
I'm IRISH so I MUST have a drinking problem
I'm INDIAN so I MUST own a convenience store
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN so I MUST dance around a fire
I'm a CHEERLEADER so I MUST be a whore
I'm a DANCER so I MUST be a stupid, stuck-up whore
I WEAR SKIRTS A LOT so I MUST be a slut
I'm a PUNK so I MUST do drugs
I'm RICH so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm CUBAN so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars
I'm NOT A VIRGIN so I MUST be easy
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore
I'm a TEENAGE MOM so I MUST be an irrisponsible slut
I'm POLISH so I MUST wear socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN so I MUST have a "big one"
I'm EGYPTIAN so I MUST be a terrorist
I'm PRETTY so I MUST NOT be a virgin
I HAVE STRIGHT "A"S so I MUST have no social life
I'm into THEATER AND ART so I MUST be a homosexual
I'm a VEGETARIAN so I MUST be a crazy political activist
I have BIG BOOBS so I MUST be a ho
I'm COLUMBIAN so I MUST be a drug dealer
I'm RUSSIAN so I MUST be cool
I'm GERMAN so I MUST be a Nazi
I hang out with GAYS so I MUST be gay, too
I'm BRAZILLAN so I MUST have a big butt
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be a prude
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be ugly

I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited.
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy.
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas.
Im a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction.
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude.
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control

I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.

I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE so I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I'm SCOTTISH so I MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirt (It's actually called a kilt)
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER! (What?)
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy.
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue. (I don't think she is)
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government (on some points), so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.

I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting
I love marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake
I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I like FIRE so I must be an arsonist.
I play VIDEO GAMES so I MUST be a LOSER

I LONG BOARD so I MUST BE AWSUM...oh wait...

Friends & Best Friends

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.

BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."

FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.

BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much?"

FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.

BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.

FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.

BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.

BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.

FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool withyou at that time of the month.

BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.

BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run - beep - run!"

FRIENDS: Will help you move.

BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.

FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.

BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.

BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.

BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "Dang, we screwed up"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.

BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.

BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.

BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Fade

BEST FRIENDS: Are forever

79 Things to do in an Elevator (Soooo funny)

1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5. Meow occasionally.
6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" - and back away slowly.
7. Say "DING!" at each floor.
8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.
9. Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10. Stare grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14. When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug. Tell them that you will never forget them.
16. Ask if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17. Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18. Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20. Pretend you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
21. Swat at flies that don't exist.
22. Call out "Group hug!" then enforce it.
23. Make car race noises when someone gets on or off.
24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift with you.
25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"
26. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.
28. Let your cell phone ring - don't answer it.
29. Walk into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't.
31. Ask people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.
32. Also in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.
33. Ask, "Did you feel that?"
34. Tell people that you can see their aura.
35. When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
36. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
37. Dress up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time..."
38. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.
39. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
40. Sell Girl Scout cookies.
41.On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.
42. Shave.
43. Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
44. Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"
45. One word: Flatulence!
46. On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
47. Do Tai Chi exercises.
48. When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now, darn motion sickness!"
49. Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
50. Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"
51. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
52. Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.
53. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
54. Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"
55. Leave a box between the doors.
56. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.
57. Start a sing-along.
58. Play the harmonica.
59. Lean against the button panel.
60. Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
61. Bring a chair along.
62. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"
63. Blow spit bubbles.
64. Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
65. Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
66. Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at the passengers.
67. Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."
68. If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"
69. Bring a water pistol. Soak everyone's shoes.
70. Start brushing off invisible bugs from your arms, screaming "Aaughh! Get them off!"
71. Challenge your neighbor to a "Tic-Tac-Toe" tournament.
72. Laugh hysterically for five seconds, stop, and glare at the other passengers like they are crazy.
73. Charge into the elevator dripping wet, holding a towel and wearing only a bath robe.
74. Mutter something about how husbands/wives always come home early just when it's getting to the good part.
75. Make chalk drawings on the walls.
76. As the elevator is going up, jump violently up and down, shouting "Down! I said down, darn it!"
77. Crouch in one corner and growl menacingly at everyone who gets on.
78. Try to get a game of "Twister" going.
79. Wrinkle your nose and smell the air repeatedly. Sniff at your neighbor suspiciously, give a disgusted frown, and take a step away.

If Joe Jonas was about to jump off the Eiffel Tower 95% of all the girls in the world would die. Would you be one of the 5% with popcorn yelling "Do a flip!"?

97% of teens would cry if they saw Robert Patterson (Edward Cullen from Twilight) standing on top of a sky scraper, about to jump. If you're one of the 3% who would sit there eating pop corn screaming "DON'T FORGET THE FLIP!" then copy and paste this to your profile

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren’t, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimieKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, That Bloody Demon, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienal, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minomoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy The Mary-Sue Slayer, Random Little Writer, SamanthaFantasyFan, The-Good-Die-Alone, Daughter of a Renegade, Littlewhisker, Snowdancer56, MoonAquaAngel, warriorfreak, jasminesolo, Protector of Canon2, (this goes for all of us) TheThroppSistersandCompany, muffinlover101, AmaraBellaGirl, Little Christian, BML1997, aleixia1012, Wazzella, Bellykid5, ScareCrowPrincess

(\)_(/) This is Bunny, created by BritishGallagherGirl.

(='.'=) Copy and paste Bunny into your profile to help him gain WORLD DOMINATION

I am the kid that doesn't go to school dances, or games, and when I do go, I sit in a corner and read a book. I am the kid that people look through when I say something. I am the kid that spends most of there free time reading, writing, or doing other activities that most teenagers wouldn't call normal. I am the kid that people call weird and a freak either behind my back or to my face. I am the kid that doesn't spend all there time on MySpace, or talking to a friend nonstop on a cellphone or regular phone. I am the kid that hasn't been asked out in a year. I am the kid that has stopped to smell the flowers and jump and splash in the rain. BUT I am also the kid who knows and is proud to be who they are, doesn’t care if people call me weird (it's a compliment),who loves reading and writing and doing the things that no one seems to have the time to do any more, who loves and is obsessed with alot of things, who can express themself better with words than actions, who doesn't need a bf/gf to complete him/her, and knows the importance of the little things. Copy and paste this onto your account, and add your name to the list, if you are anything like me, so the kids who are different and unique can know in their weakest time that they are unique but not aloneBearhug946, EdwardCullenEqualsLife, Stephanie Deux,Randomenated-Cullen!, MiniBellaSwan, Jayleen-Cullen-Whitlock-Hale, Emmett or Edward, Volleyballgurl09, Radr180, Linzerj, Butchee, xFireChickx, rachpop15, KNDnumbuh007, yougotburned,kikipalmer21,numbuh13m, Amydiddle, StarGirl26, Karategurl13, little nightingale2, ninja-girl202,nicoleblakk, Agent Catherine, Waddles26813, ScareCrowPrincess

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

As Part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

The hard "c" will be dropped if favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 2 letters shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments wil enkourage the removal of double leters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be droped from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German lik zey vunted in ze forst plas.