iLoveEverythingR5
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Joined 02-08-14, id: 5513785, Profile Updated: 05-05-14

This is all me.. ALL me. c:

How to Tell if You're a Writer
-If you talk to yourself.
-If you talk to yourself about talking to yourself (i.e. 'I wonder why I talk to myself ch?')
-If, when you talk to yourself, you sometimes speak as if talking to another person (i.e. 'Okay, so have you ever noticed that the word 'deliver' could mean someone's liver?')
-If, after uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand in awe and say, 'Wow, this is good stuff for sugar highs!'
-If you live off of sugar and caffeine.
-If people start to notice that you tend to check your e-mail every day for a week, then suddenly disappear off the face of the planet.
-If your e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.
-If, when replying to someone else's e-mail, you are sometimes so random that you fail to address the original message altogether.
-If you tend to collect the Bic Stics people leave lying around, kind of like picking pennies off the ground.
-If, no matter where you are in your room, you never have to so much as get up to reach a pen/pencil and paper.
-If the letters are starting to wear off on the keys of your keyboard.
-If people think you might have A.D.D.
-If you think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.
-If you start constantly talking in third person, past tense.
-If you think about making lists like this, and start giggling for no 'apparent' reason.
-If your friends don't even bother to look funny at you anymore when you start giggling for no apparent reason.
-And finally, the number one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101.

Things I do when I go to Walmart..

15 Things to do when you're in Walmart!

1. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

2. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

3. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

4. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

5. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

6. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

7. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

8. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

9. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.

10. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

11. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look."

12. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

13. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "NO! NO! It's those voices again!"

14. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There's no toilet paper in here!

15. Grap alot of bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting "Go, Pikachu, Go!"

Socially Weird Things A REAL friend would do.. c: (Just Sayin')

Friend: Will bail me out of jail
Best friend: Would be in the room next to me saying, THAT WAS AWESOME , LETS DO IT AGAIN!!

Friend: Will comfort me when he breaks up with me
Best friend: Will call him, whispering "Seven days..."

Friend: Will help me find my way when I'm lost
Best Friend: Will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions

Friend: Will help me learn to drive
Best Friend: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance

Friend: Will watch my pets when I go away
Best Friend: Won't let me go away

Friend: Will help me up when I fall down
Best Friend: Will point and laugh because she tripped me

Friend: Will go to a concert with me
Best Friend: Will kidnap the band with me

Friend: Will comfort me when he breaks my heart
Best Friend: Will help me plot my revenge and get with his best friend

Friend: Calls your parents by Mr. and Mrs.
Best friend: Calls your parents dad and mom.

Friend: Has never seen you cry
Best Friend: Has always had the best shoulder to cry on

Friend: Never asks for anything to eat or drink
Best friend: Opens the fridge and makes herself at home

Friend: Asks you to write down your number.
Best friend : They ask you for their number (cuz they can't remember it)

Friend: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back
Best friend: Has a closet full of your stuff

Friend: Only knows a few things about you
Best friend: Could write a biography on your life

Friend: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing
Best friend: Will always go with you

Friend: Will help you find your prince.
Best friend: Will kidnap him and brings him to you.

Friend: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.
Best friend: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"

Friend: Will offer you a soda.
Best friend: Will dump theirs on you.

Friend: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.
Best friend: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.

Friend: Will give you their umbrella in the rain.
Best friend: Will take yours and say, "Run - beep - run!"

Friend: Will help you move.
Best friend: Will help you move the bodies.

Friend: Will console you when you house catches on fire.
Best friend: Will roast marshmallows and flirt with the firemen.

Friend: Will ask why you're crying.
Best friend: Will already have the shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry.

Friend: Will tell you she knows how you feel.
Best friend: Will just sit down and cry.

Friend: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
Best friend: Will already know not to tell.

Friend: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
Best friend: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say "Drink the rest of that! You know we don't waste!

Friend: Will never ask for food.
Best friend: Is the reason you have no food.

Friend: Will knock on your front door.
Best friend: Will walk right in and say "I'M HOME!"

Friend: Will say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world.
Best friend: Will not only kick everything out of their schedule to listen to what's wrong, but help come up with vindictive plans to make you feel a whole lot better!

Friend: Will say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours.
Best friend: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out.

Friend: Hides me from the cops
Best Friend: is probably the reason they are after me in the first place

Friend: lets me make an idiot of myself in public
Best Friend: Is up there with me making an idiot out of herself too.

If you rearrange the following words, you'll find that the same letters spell the given definition. Someone out there either has too much
spare time, or is really good at Scrabble.

Dormitory: Dirty room

Astronomer: Moon starer

George Bush: He bugs Gore

The eyes: They see

Slot machine: Cash lost in me

Desperation: A rope ends it

Presbyterian: Best in prayer

Election results: Lies! Let's recount

Snooze alarm: Alas! no more z's

Eleven plus two: Twelve plus one

Mother in law: Woman Hitler

The Morse code: Here come dots

A decimal point: I'm a dot in place

Thank you for reading this very, very horrible page. Now, on with below! Wow.. That sounds awkward.. Hola!