![]() Hi! Welcome to my peachy profile! About Me: Name: Alissa Band(s) of the Moment: Hollywood Undead, MGMT Favorite Shows: House, CSI: Miami, CSI: NY, CSI:LV, The Mentalist, Lie to Me, NCIS, Bones, Psych, Burn Notice, Mental Favorite Movies: Pirates of the Carribbean 1,2 and 3, Stardust, The Spirit, Yes Man, Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist, Empire Records, Anything Disney, Finding Nemo Quotes "Why do we kill people who kill people to show that killing people is wrong?" "Never argue with an idiot. They'll drag you down to their level and beat you with experience" "After a year in therapy, my psychiatrist finally said to me 'Maybe life isn't for everyone'" "You wanna know how I got these scars?" "You are a ray of sunshine on a cloudy day" "You're like our brother... half-brother?... weird kid that lives down the street and eats nothing but mayonaise on saltines?" "They could build monuments to your self-centeredness" "Let's shoot him!... No, let's cut out his tongue!... No, no, no let's shoot him, cut out his tongue, then shoot his tongue!" "Now I'm being followed by a rock... lovely" "I hate funerals. They're depressing, they play organ music, and six times out of ten there is a snake in the casket!" "Muffins are just ugly cupcakes, but we love them anyway" "What's the fun in being cool if you can't wear a sombrero?" "We're so cool ice cubes are jealous" "I like running with scissors, it makes me feel dangerous" "Sometimes I creep myself out" "Come to the darkside, we have cookies" "If you choke a smurf what color would it turn?" "Are people born stupid or do they have to work at it?" "I have lots of ideas. Trouble is most of them suck" "The problem with reality is that there's no backround music" "If you think things can't get worse, than you lack suffiencent imagination" "I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it" "Some people are only alive because it's illegal to kill them" "You're just jealous 'cause the voices only talk to me" "When life gives you lemons, squirt them in your enemy's eyes" "I can set ants on fire with a magnefying glass... at night" "I like my coffee black, just like my brain-damaged neurologists" "No one grows up in Florida unless they're an orange" "It usually starts with a holla and ends with a cremesicle... and if there's time in between...THUNDERCATS!" "This conversaion is now over because I have officially run out of things to call the guy" "It sounded like you were having Bella for lunch and we came to see if you would share" "How do you tell when someone's a compulsive liar? Assuming their pants aren't already on fire?" "Nice job partner! You drove through those obstacles like a...ferret...on roller skates" "You're pocket knife is still in my back incase you're wondering" "Put that in your pipe and smoke it" "How 'bout them apples?" "We have come to the conclusion that it was Colonal Mustard, in the conservatory, with the wrench!" "Did you know before he stabbed a guy he was actually a life coach?... Who would hire him as a life coach?... The guy he stabbed" "When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep-- not screaming like the passengers in his car" "Flying is learning to throw yourself at the ground and miss" "A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me in kickboxing" "I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals, but because I hate plants" "I love to go down to the school yard and watch the little kids jump around and run around yelling and screaming. They don't know I'm only using blanks" "At my lemonade stand I used to give the first glass away free and charge five dollars for the refill. The refill contained the antidote" "I was the kid next door's imaginary friend" "I used to think the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body. Then I relized who was telling me this" "Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem. Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash." "Reality is a big, nasty, vicious dragon, but I don't believe in dragons." "What side do you put it on?" "For a while, I really wanted to be gay. But it didn't work out for me." "I heard they're not letting you guys get drunk. Sucks for you!" "I have guy friends of the female gender" "But if you put ice cubes in it, my water will get all watery" "I'm English,we don't use guns, we use our foreheads" "Your the type of moron who goes to jail for a crime you didn't commit. See, what I should do is shoot you and tell the cops you attacked me after confesseng to the murder" "Legally, since it was with my stuff, can I claim it as my own and toss it into a volcano?" "He probably figured Vincent here would panic and throw it out because, well, he's English" "You know I'm straight, right?" "I'm not afraid of heights! However I am afraid of falling out of this tree" "Ring, ring... Hello" "Shit, I mean shoot. No, actually, I mean shit. I really do" "I wish you were here...in my room...on my bed...the lights are off...we go under the blanket...and I show you my new watch that glows in the dark!!..." "I'd like to take a stab at you with my very large dic...tionary" "Fish are friends, not food" "Hello...I'm Batman" "When I have a kid, I want to put him in one of those strollers for twins and then run around the mall looking frantic" "Don't get high on life, cereal hurts when it gets stuck up your nose" "Can you help me find my puppy? I think he went into this cheap motel room" "Never laugh at a clown with a gun" "I think that the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game charades...or a game of fake heart attack" "If I ever saw an amputee getting hanged I'd probably start calling out letters" "If I have to move up in a building, I choose the elevator over the escalator. Because one time I was riding the escalator and I tripped. I fell down the stairs for an hour and a half" "I like parties, but I don't like pinatas because the pinata promotes violence against flamboyant animals. Hey there's a donkey with some pizzazz...let's kick his ass. What I'm trying to say is don't make the same Halloween costume mistake I did" "Long lay the world, in sin and error pining, til he appeared, and the soul felt it's worth" "Tastes like tinfoil" "Eat my shorts!" "I wish I could write as mysterious as a cat" "If you wish to forget anything on the spot, make a note that this thing is to be remembered" "Years of love have been forgotten in the hatred of a minute" |
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