British Gamer Kitty
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Joined 11-16-13, id: 5331135, Profile Updated: 11-16-13

How to tell if you're a Yognaught:

  1. You think that there's nothing that can't be solved by digging a hole, a giant fan (Or tesla coil.), or large amounts of t.n.t.
  2. You believe you're being stalked by Israphael.
  3. You start thinking that there are nukes under your house.
  4. You build your own personal island and fill it with pigs.
  5. You actually built a wall of machines.
  6. The only thing you think about are Minecraft, Minecraft mods, and anything Minecraft related.
  7. The other only thing you think about is the Yogscast, Yogscast stuff, and everything Yogscast related.
  8. You talk to mushrooms.
  9. You personally feel that the Nether can go screw itself.
  10. You think that brown mushrooms are evil and red mushrooms are good.
  11. You keep trying to make a Ring of Arcana, Void Ring, or Red Matter Katar (And keep wondering why they aren't working.).
  12. You start using British words or phrases with a really convincing accent.
  13. You spontaneously start singing "Screw the Nether", "Form this Way", or "Dwarf Hole.".
  14. You want to be a potato when you grow up.
  15. You built an exact replica of Blackrock, Mistral City, Duncan's Castle, or Honeydew Inc.
  16. When you hear the word "Dwarf", you automatically think of Honeydew.
  17. Your friends think you're crazy when you talk about "King Barry".
  18. You quote the Yogscast at least once a day.
  19. You've actually tasted a Jaffa cake.
  20. You watch the Yogscast all day, every day.

(If you're a Yognaught and proud of it, copy and paste this on to your profile.)


How to Tell if You're a Writer

-If you talk to yourself.

-If you talk to yourself about talking to yourself (i.e. ‘I wonder why I talk to myself so much?’)

-If, when you talk to yourself, you sometimes speak as if talking to another person (i.e. ‘Okay, so have you ever noticed that the word ‘deliver’ could mean removing someone’s liver?’)

-If, after uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand in awe and say, ‘Wow, this is good stuff for sugar highs!’

-If you live off of sugar and caffeine.

-If people start to notice that you tend to check your e-mail every day for a week, then suddenly disappear off the face of the planet.

-If your e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

-If, when replying to someone else’s e-mail, you are sometimes so random that you fail to address the original message altogether.

-If, no matter where you are in your room, you never have to so much as get up to reach a pen/pencil and paper.

-If the letters are starting to wear off on the keys of your keyboard.

-If people think you might have A.D.D.

-If you think it’d be cool to have A.D.D.

-If you start constantly talking in third person, past tense.

-If you think about making lists like this, and start giggling for no ‘apparent’ reason.

-If your friends don’t even bother to look funny at you anymore when you start giggling for no apparent reason.

-And finally, the number one way to tell if you’re a good writer: If you worship English 101.

Copy and Paste this if you're a writer.

1: Real name: N* a Anne L*z (I don't want you knowing my real name! You can have my middle names)

2.Your nobody name (Take all the letters from your first name, mix them up, and put an x where you think it should go) Anlix

3.Your gangsta name (the first three letters of your name plus "izzle"): Naizzle (Just don't ask me how to pronounce it...)

4.Your Detective name (fav. color and fav.animal.) Red Cat

5.Your Soap Oprah name (your middle name and the street you live on): Anne Mix Path

6.Your Star Wars name (first three letters of your last name,first two letters of your first) Labna (Weird)

7.Your Superhero name (2nd fav color, fav drink): Orange Mt. Dew (This suprisingly is real)

8.Your Witness Protection name (middle names of your parents): Jean Mae

9.Your Goth name (Black plus the name of one of your pets): Black Princess

10. Your Warrior Cat name (Your favorite animal they would know about and your favorite last warrior cat name): Hmm..I have to choose second favourite animal soo...Owlwing

To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity

1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.

2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.

3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.

4. When caught sleeping at school/work/wherever you are not supposed to be sleeping, and you are woken up, shout, "AMEN!"

5.Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.

6.When you drop a pen, don't pick it up. When someone reaches to pick it up for you, scream, "Wait! That's mine!!!"

7.Finish All Your sentences with 'In Accordance With The Prophecy'. (Ahahahahahahaha! Hahahahahahahaha, hahahahahahaha, haha, ahahaha, ha...ohh...)

9. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

11.Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.

12. Sing Along At The Opera.

14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.

15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.

17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream 'I Won! I Won!'

18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'

19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner,'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'

20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity...

Copy and Paste this To Make People who read bios Smile.

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual labels on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

On a bar o f Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere)

On a hair straightener: "Do not use in water." (Yes, because I always straighten my hair when I'm taking a bath.)

Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity copy and paste this into your profile! XD


The Lessons Warrior Cats Have Taught Us

Violence doesn't solve all problems, but it does solve some. And they should be solved very violently.

Your logic doesn't have to make sense if you're angry enough.

Killing your half-brother solves all of your problems for 6-12 months, depending on how evil he is.

Cats are really good at cleaning massive bloodstains.

Gaining nine lives causes you to die nine times as frequently as everyone else.

Highly organized colonies of feral cats have been living in the English countryside for over 60 years without being noticed by anyone.

Having fangirls gives you the right to do virtually anything without being considered evil *cough*Ashfur*cough*Scourge*cough*.

If you eat too much fish, your blood tastes fishy.

Its possible to complain about anything.

Happy endings are unrealistic.

Plans that rely on the cooperation of others have a tendency not to work.

God isn't going to do anything for you because he wants you to maintain both the freedom and the capacity to just get off your lazy butt and do it yourself.

The general public doesn't know anything.

People who secretly like you make the best evil minions.

It's possible to not notice that you are pregnant.

The default response to being dumped by someone is to devote yourself to making them watch their family die slow, painful deaths.

If you try hard enough, you can be pregnant and give birth without anyone noticing.

Stars are really the spirits of dead cats.

War crimes are perfectly fine if God tells you to commit them.

Just because someone has gone to hell doesn't mean you don't have to deal with them anymore.

Don't mess with beavers.

Thunderstorms are inherently dramatic.

Forbidden relationships happen about as often as socially legitimate ones.

If you play with your food, and owl will come and eat you.