If you can read this message, you are blessed, because over two billion people in the world cannot read at all:
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg.
The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid.
Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.
The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm.
Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig huh?
Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool!
(If you can read that please put it in your profile.)
1. CRACK open your briefcase or handbag, peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2. STAND silent and motionless in the corner facing the wall without getting off.
3. WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4. GREET everyone with a warm handshake and ask him or her to call you Admiral.
5. MEOW occasionally.
6. STARE At another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM" - and back away slowly
7. SAY -DING at each floor.
8. SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And push all the red buttons.
9.MAKE explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
10. STARE, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce: "I have new socks on."
11. WHEN the elevator is silent, look around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"
12. TRY to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13. DRAW a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers: "This is my personal space."
14. WHEN there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.
15. PUSH the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
16. ASK if you can push the button for other people but push the wrong ones.
17. HOLD the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After a while, let the doors close and say "Hi Greg, How's your day been?"
18. DROP a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream: "That's mine!"
19. BRING a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20. PRETEND you're a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the Passengers.
21. SWAT at flies that don't exist.
22. CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.
23. MAKE car race noises when someone gets on or off.
24. CONGRATULATE all for being in the same lift with you.
25. GRIMACE painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"
26. WALK on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. WHILE the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!" then whistle innocently.
28. LET your cell phone ring - don't answer it.
29. WALK into the lift and say "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
30. TAKE shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when the others don't.
31. ASK people which floor they want, say in 'Who want to be a millionaire' style is that your final answer.
32. ALSO in your bellboy act, ask what floor they want. Whatever they say, give them a glare and say "you should be ashamed of yourself!", and leave the lift tutting.
33. ASK, "Did you feel that?"
34. TELL people that you can see their aura.
35. WHEN the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
36. ANNOUNCE in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
37. DRESS up in a long, black cloak with a hood, stare and in a deep voice announce "It is time...
38. START breathing heavily and grab your chest when someone walks in. Then stumble out gasping for air
39. WHEN someone comes in ask them to press 5 or 6 different floors
40. GET in and don't press any buttons. Wait for the elevator to be called somewhere and repeat 39.
41. IF you are the only one in the elevator, press all of the buttons and stand, staring at the door, waiting for someone to come.
42. LAUGH maniacally whenever anyone looks at you and say you're here for the mental health convention.
16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"
9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme song.
12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!
16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"
Repost this if you laughed... Or are planning to do any of these things
7 Ways to Scare your roommates
7) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, "Soon, soon..."
6) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.
5) Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When you recover, say you can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.
4) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.
3) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey, where the heck is my sandwich?" Complain loudly that you are hungry.
2) Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as you can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't you be going somewhere?"
1) Talk back to your Rice Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer."
19 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity~
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it "In".
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Drugs".
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".
8. dont use any punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
18. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
I'm not so good on the advice, can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaa... no.
Same shit... different day
I'm in shape! Round is a shape
Don't knock on death's door, ring the doorbell and run. He hates that!
Crunk: to be crazy and drunk at the same time
Brunettes will NEVER be the new blonde.
I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it.
I trip UP the stairs
If the shoe fits... buy one in every color!
I know KUNG-FU and 50 other dangerous words.
I say we shoot Cupid and see how he likes it.
Shut-up voices, or I'll poke you with a Q-tip again.
No I WON'T go to hell, I've got a restraining order.
My imaginary friend thinks you have serious problems...
Somewhere a village is missing their idiot.
Yo mamma is so fat even Neji can't see through her. OH!
Stop talking, I'm out of asprin.
Yeah well, your mom thinks square roots are vegetables!
Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?
I will not make any jokes about Lupin and his time of the month.
The FBI is not your friend.
If you can't laugh at yourself I'll be glad to do it for you.
Sweetie, you're about as fake as the rumors you spread.
I'm not cynical, everything just sucks.
People like you are the reason we have middle fingers.
Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.
I am the future of America. Be afraid. Be very afraid.
When Death Eaters are attacking Hogsmade I shall not point to the dark mark and shout, "To the batmobile, Robin!"
It's not that I'm a bitch, I just don't like you.
Muffins are just ugly cupcakes, but we love them anyway.
You're funny... looking.
Cheers! To another awkward moment.
She's my best friend, break her heart and I'll break your face.
We are all pretty bizzare, some are just better at showing it.
He said: I don't see why you wear a bra, you've got nothing to put in it. She said: you wear pants don't you?
We were always funny in that car crash sort of way.
DUDE! That wasn't funny.
When I said, "I'd hit that," I meant with my car.
Someday, your prince charming will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too STUBBORN to ask for directions.
Procastinators UNITE... tomorrow.
If at first you don't succeed. then skydiving definitely isn't for you.
Someone is thinking about sex... OK... it's me
We're so cool ice cubes are jealous.
Yeah well... YOUR MOM! Oh... what now!
Of course we come from monkeys, just look at your mom.
If annoyed further I shall spork your eyes out.
Welcome to Loserville! Population: you.
Milk and cookies are so 1993... give Santa beer.
Moo. I'm a pig.
Come to the darkside. We have cookies.
Lead me not into temptation, I can find the way myself.
Bitch & you know it.
You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh, you jump off a cliff, I laugh even harder.
I won't think about guys, I won't think about guys, I won't think about guys, WHOA! That's a hot guy!
Oh please, I don't turn heads, I fucking break necks.
When poeple don't laugh at our jokes I don't think of it as a "you had to be there thing" but more of a "you have to be mentally retarded like us thing."
Homework is not an option, my bed is sending out some serious nap vibes. I can't help myself.
Life is like a pack of gum, I've yet to figure out why...
I'm not crazy! My reality is just different than yours.
I swear to drunk I'm not God!
You're just jealous because the voices are talking to me.
I'm not short, I'm just unusually not tall.
HAHA! I don't get it.
A good friend helps you up when you fall, but a best friend laughs at you and trips you again.
A good friend would give you an umbrella when it rains, but a best friend will take your and say, "Run bitch, run!"
Yeah, I'm a loser, but the coolest loser you'll ever meet.
A friend would call you a retard, but a best friend would call you one and act like one with you.
Stress: when the body can no longer resist the urge to choke the living shit out of some asshole who really deserves it.
Mornings should be illegal.
I'll try to be to be nicer if you try to be smarter.
Let me know if anything I say offends you. I may want to offend you again later.
I didn't lose my mind, I sold it on eBay.
Cute but psycho, things even out.
Was that an earthquake or did I just rock your world?
Friends will be like like, "Well you deserve better." But best friends will prank calling him and saying "You will die in seven days."
If you're gonna be two faced sweetie, at least make one of them pretty.
My knight in shining armor turned out to be a loser in alluminum foil.
42 muscles to frown muscles, 4 muscles to stick up my middle finger and tell em to bite me.
HAHA! Wait, what?
Hapy thoughts... happy thoughts... puppies... ice cream... fat people falling over...
Doctors say I have multiple personalities, but WE don't agree with that.
"Yay! Not guilty! Sleepover at my house kids!" -Michael Jackson
Brilliant: adj. 1. Marked by unusual and impressive intellectual acuteness 2. magnificent; glorious 3. me
A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
Genius by birth, slacker by choice.
Our survival requires bold, decisive, visionary leadership. So basically we're all screwed.
I don't only want to rain on your parade, I want to blow up all the floats.
school: n. Hell with flourescent lighting
98 of teens are bringing sexy back but I'm in the 2 sexy never left
We're with you whatever happens (you know, unless spiders are involved)
1 tequila, 2 tequila, 3 tequila, floor
You mess with me and I'll mail !@# your back to you in a Pringles can.
The tooth fairy teaches kids that they can get money for selling body parts, I blame her for prostitution.
I put the fun in dysfunctional!
It's only funny until someone gets hurt... then it's hilarious!
One day as you lay in bed and look at the stars you wonder... where the hell is my roof?!
A good friend will come bail you out of jail... but a best friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn... we fucked up."
No Tresspassing. Violators will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.
Save the earth! (it's the only planet with chocolate)
I'm the type of girl who will burst out laughing in dead silence because of something that happened yesterday.
I've got A.D.D. and magic markers. Oh the thrills I will have.
You are: hot, sexy, nice, oops! Sorry, wrong person.
Myspace: because we're really doing our homework aren't we?
They say I have A.D.D. but they just don't understand... Oh look! A chicken!
I'll kill him. I'll kill him dead. Like with a rock... or something
You are the diet coke of evil!
We didn't do it. Nobody saw us do it. Can't prove anything.
You're a special kind of stupid aren't you?
Everything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.
DO NOT SET YOURSELF ON FIRE! It kinda hurts...
I hate you. Why? I need a reaon?
Brunette: I was listening to Eminem last night. Blonde: You were listening to candy? (I did that once when someone said they were listening to Eminem)
People are like slinkies, basically useless. And yet it's so amusing to watch them fall down the stairs.
I tried sniffing coke but the ice cubes got stuck in my nose.
Supported by maffia... you hit me... we hit you.
Six hours later I still hadn't written anything but I did win 7 out o 245 games of solitare.
DON'T HIT KIDS! No, seriously, they have guns.
When French people swear do they say pardon my English?
What is that? A bird? A plane? No dumbasses, it's Superman.
Sex is not the answer! Sex is the question, yes is the answer.
SMILE! It confuses people.
Don't worry, you're just as sane as I am.
I'm not short, I'm fun-sized!
I don’t think the word “school” deserves to have the word “cool” in it.
Yes I do use my hairbrush as a microphone thank you very much!
I know you’re probably thinking ‘Oh no she didn’t!’ but I just so totally did!
I don’t obsess, I think intensely.
As I was wondering why Frisbees get bigger as they get closer… it hit me.
I was going to take over the world by I got distracted by something sparkly.
It’s a beautiful day, now watch some asshole fuck it up.
It only seems like I'm a smartass because I'm surrounded by dumbasses.
I'm not conceited, I'm simply aware of my sexy little self.
Your trailer park called, their trash is missing.
The police are looking for a suspect described as sexy, funny, & great in bed. Your ugly ass is safe, but where should I hide?
Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.
Boys: can’t live with em, and it’s illegal to shoot em.
What happens if you get scared half to death... twice?
Smirk, it makes people wonder what you’re up to, while scaring the shit out of them at the same time!|
If you act crazy all your life, they'll never be able to commit you.
Mental Health is overrated.
Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights do make a left.
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.
Me breaking the rules? No. I test their elasticity.
A good lawyer knows the law, a great lawyer knows the judge.
The road to success is always under construction.
I'm looking forward to regretting this.
Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
If electricty comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
24 hours in a day ... 24 beers in a case ... coincidence? I think not…
English! Who needs that? I'm never going to England!
Can I get your picture? I collect natural disasters.
I would tell ya to go to hell but then I'd be stuck with you for all eternity!
Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
He who laughs last, thinks the slowest.
First law of science: don't spit into the wind.
If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work.
Men are like roses, you got to watch out for all the pricks.
Behind every successful woman, is a man who is surprised.
Whoever said nothing's impossible never tried to slam a revolving door.
If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten.
Earth first. We'll screw up the other planets later.
Never do anything that you wouldn't want to explain to the paramedics.
I have PMS and a gun... now what were you saying?
Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.
I told my psychiatrist that everyone hated me. He told me I was being ridiculous. Everyone hadn't met me yet.
You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely.
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
Randomness is the base of conversation.
I hear high school's easier the second time around.
Satan's from Canada!
Some things children's eyes shouldn't see...your face is one of them.
Save your breath...You'll need it to blow your date.
Your ridiculous little opinion has been noted.
Don't like my driving? Then quit watching me.
Try not to let your mind wander... It is too small and fragile to be out by itself.
Never mess with guys wearing make-up. They mean business.
Mommy...What're those two boys doing?
People can be either crazy or sane but only if they're both do they have problems.
That which does not kill me had better run pretty damn fast.
If someone breaks your heart, just punch them in the face. Oh sure, it seems obvious now, but you'd be amazed at how many people don't think of it when it's relevant. Seriously, just punch them in the face and go get some ice cream.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I was born beautiful, but what the hell happened to you?
Fanfiction is for losers! Oh wait...
When your dad is mad at you and asks you, "Do I look stupid?" don't answer him.
Never tell your mom her diet isn't working.
When the blind leadeth the blind... get out of the way.
A rose by any other name would likely be "deadly thorn-bearing assault vegetation." -Robert Bullock
I do visit reality, although it's on a tourist visa. -Anonymous
Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable we have to alter it every six months. -Oscar Wilde
Careful or you'll end up in my novel.
I'm a multi-tasker. I can talk AND annoy you at the same time.
Guys don't fall for me; I trip them.
Keep your attitude, I have my own.
Screw the rules I have green hair.
Screw the money I have rules... wait, let's try that again.
For what is a house but a cage to which parents anchor and chain their children to?
Anime: more addicting than crack. Yay crack!
I'm cooler; get over it.
I'm not hyper... really.
If drama was vodka our school would be wasted.
Of course I'm mature. =p
Must. Hide. Dead. Body.
Shhhhh... I'm plotting.
Congratulations, you have just redefied the term "psychotic" (totally me)
Please note: Christmas is cancelled. Apparently you told Santa you had been good this year. He died laughing.
Be optimistic. All the people you hate are eventually going to die.
Chaos, panic, and disorder... my work here done.
Don't you need a license to be that ugly?
I believe in dragons, unicorns, good men, and other mythical creatures.
Normal people worry me.
Of course I'm out of my mind. It's dark and scary in there.
I'm smiling, that alone should scare you.
The dark is afraid of me.
I'm not grouchy, everyone else is just too happy.
Secret admirer: stalker with stationary.
Bite me. On second thought, don't.
Smile. It makes people run away.
For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen. -Douglas Adams
I like deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. -Douglas Adams
He attacked everythig in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which. -Douglas Adams
He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped there wasn't an afterlife. -Douglas Adams
Humans are not proud of their ancestors and rarely invite them round to dinner. -Douglas Adams
In the beginning, the universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move. -Douglas Adams
Oh I heard every word. Individually they're fine, together? That's a whoooooole different story. -my daddy|
In those days spirits were brave, the stakes were high, men were real men, women were real women, and small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri really were small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri. -Douglas Adams
It is no coincidence that in no know language does the phrase 'As pretty as an airport' appear. -Douglas Adams
The ships hung in the sky much the same way bricks don't. -Douglas Adams
Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so. -Douglas Adams
You live and learn. At any rate, you live. -Douglas Adams
Human beings, who are most unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of oters, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so. -Douglas Adams
The last time anybody made a list of the top hundred character attributes of New Yorkers, common sense snuck in at number 79. -Douglas Adams
He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it. -Douglas Adams
Nothing travels faster than the speed of light with the possible exception of bad news which obeys its own special laws. -Douglas Adams
Ah, this is obviously some strange usage of the word 'safe' that I wasn't previously aware of. -Douglas Adams
Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job. -Douglas Adams
Under every stone lurks a politician. -Aristophanes
You have all the characteristics of a popular politician: a horrible voice, bad breeding, and a vulgar manner -Aristophanes
Now I know what a statesman is; he's a dead politician. We need more statesmen. -Bob Edwards
When Solomon said there was a time and a place for everything he had not encountered the problem of parking his automobile. -Bob Edwards
I don't have pet peeves, I have whole kennels of irritation. -Whoopi Goldberg
A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five. -Groucho Marx
Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped. -Groucho Marx
From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend reading it. -Groucho Marx
I could dance with you until the cows come home. On second thought, I'd rather dance witht he cows until you come home. -Groucho Marx
I find television very educating. Every time someone turns ont he set, I go into the other room and read a book. -Groucho Marx
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.- Groucho Marx
Love is a malicious bitch. -TillThatTime
If the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.
If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. And then give up. No use being a damn fool about it.
Too often we forget life's simple pleasures...
Remember the next time someone annoys you, it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown but only 4 to extend your arm to bitch slap the mother fuckerupside the head.
A little boy was overhead saying the prayer, "God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, God bless Grandma, and good-bye Grandpa." The next day the grandfather died of a heart attack. A few weeks later, he said the prayer, "God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, and good-bye Grandma." The next day, the grandma was hit by a bus. She died without feeling a thing. A few weeks later, the boy said, "God bless Mommy and good-bye Daddy." His father, of course, spent the rest of the next day panicking. His normally 10-minute drive to work took 45 minutes because he was being so extra cautious. When he got home from work, his wife said, "Honey, isn't this weird? The milkman dropped dead at the door this morning."
Number your twelve favorite Naruto characters (in no particular order) and answer the following questions:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10.
11.
12.
1. Have you ever read a six eleven fic before?
2. Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
3. What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant? …
4. Do you recall any fan-fics about Nine?
5. Would Two and Six make a good couple?
6. Five/Nine or Five/Ten?
7. What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
8. Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fanfic.
9. Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
10. Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve Hurt/Comfort fic.
11. What kind of plot would you use if you wanted Four to de-flower One?
12. Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
13. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
14. Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
15. What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?
16. If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose?
17. If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?
18. What might be a good pick-up line for Ten to use on Two?
19. How might Eleven describe a relationship between Two and Eight?
20. How emo is Seven?
Naruto Survey
How did you discover Naruto?
Toonami.
Do you recommend Naruto to other people?
Only if I think they should suffer.
Are you happy you discovered Naruto?
Oh yeah! (so many wonderful shippings)
Are you obsessed with Naruto?
… Yeah. Yeah I am.
Are you insanely obsessed with Naruto?
Only the fanfiction.
WHEN did you first discover Naruto?
2003.
Download
Do you download Naruto manga?
No
Do you download Naruto anime?
No
Do you think you have the right to do that?
Huh?
What do you say when people tell you it's wrong to download it?
I don’t download it.
Characters
Who is your favorite male character?
Neji (because he is AWESOME)
Who is your favorite female character?
… can I leave this blank? If I have to pick I guess Tsunade.
Who is your least favorite character?
So many characters… Let’s start with Sakura and then move to Danzo and laugh at Kisame and shoot them all and stop for now before I get too ticked.
Which character do you think is most misunderstood?
Gaara (Sasuke can jump off a cliff)
Which character is most underrated?
Choji and Lee (sad day)
Which character has the worst past?
Kakashi… he has to put up with Sasuke and Sakura constantly and to some degree Naruto
What do you think of Ino and Sakura's rivalry?
They are both idiots.
Does it anger you to see Sakura reject Lee?
Eh. He deserves better.
Do you even like Lee?
He is such a sweetheart!
Do you hate Sasuke?
… Yeah. Yeah I do.
Do you hate Yashamaru?
Is hate a strong enough word?
Do you think all Gaara needs is just a hug and a good night's sleep?
And possibly happy pills.
Can anyone honestly say they hate Naruto?
Oh yeah.
Do you think Shikamaru deserved to become a chunin?
Yeah. He’s awesome and I can’t see him going for jounin.
Do you think anyone else deserved to become a chunin?
Everyone else.
Do you think Shino could've made chunin if he had the chance to fight?
Yup.
Do Shino's bugs creep you out?
Definitely.
What do you think of Kankuro's outfit?
I think if you don’t have something nice to say you shouldn’t say it at all.
What do you think of Sasuke's outfits?
I don’t really care. Although I do wonder how his shirt in Shippuden stays so precariously balanced on his shoulders…
Should Naruto ditch the orange?
NEVER!
Should Lee get a different haircut and outfit?
Not if he doesn’t want to.
Do you think Gaara is evil?
NEVER!
Do you think Orochimaru is a closet-pedophile?
He's a pedophile out of the closet too.
Do you think Itachi's nails are pretty?
Purple isn’t such a good color for him.
Do you think Haku had pretty nails?
I think Haku was pretty…
Did you originally think Haku was a girl?
Yup. Still not sure.
Did you originally think Yashamaru was a girl?
Oh yeah.
Which character is the best looking?
Neji ^.^
Which character is the worst looking?
… where to begin?
What was your first impression of Lee?
Awesome.
Do you think Sakura is useless?
Always.
Which female kicks the most ass?
Tsunade, obviously.
Who should become the 7th Hokage?
… I don’t really care at this point.
Fandom:
What is your favorite pairing?
NejiSasu
What is your least favorite pairing?
Anything with Orochimaru, Sakura, or Ino
What pairing makes the least amount of sense?
Anything with Orochimaru, Sakura, or Ino
What do you think about Naruto yaoi/yuri?
… hmmm… how to put this?
-SQUEAL!-
Do you read/write Naruto fanfiction?
Obsessively.
Do you look at/draw Naruto fanart?
Look all the time, draw on rare occasions.
What is your favorite fanfiction genre for Naruto?
Romance (all the delicious/humorous shippings…)
What do you think of all the 'Naruto gets stuck in sexy no jutsu' fics?
A homophobe’s yaoi.
Does it bother you that Gaara is so OOC in most romance fics?
Depends…
Do you think Naruto is secretly depressed and/or suicidal?
Yup.
Do you think Naruto is secretly a genius and just hides it?
Probably not on purpose.
Do you think Sasuke actually has warm fuzzy feelings for anyone?
… I sincerely doubt that
Did you think the 4th Hokage was Naruto's father before you actually found out?
On about the first page of volume 1
Do you think Shikamaru and Choji are more than just friends?
… Never really thought about it
Is Neji obsessed with birds or what?
He’s obsessive, period.
Is Kakashi really that obsessed with looking underneath the underneath?
Only when he can sneak-a-peek or mess with people.
Does Sasuke secretly lust after Naruto?
… Sure
Is Kakashi secretly lusting after one or more of his students?
… Sure
Is Kakashi secretly lusting over Iruka?
I hope so
Do you pair up characters fully aware that these are 15 year old kids?
They’re hormonal. ‘Nough said.
Or do you make them older just so you won't have that on your conscience?
Me? A conscience?
Do you like AU Naruto fics?
Depends on how well-written it is.
Do you like OC's in Naruto fics?
Never.
Do you read NCS Naruto fics?
Yup. Then I hit the back button upon realization.
Do you read M-Preg Naruto fics?
… ew
What type of Naruto fans are the most annoying?
… Sakura fans -hiss-
Do you mix your canon Naruto knowledge with your fanfic Naruto knowledge?
Rarely.
Do you get mad at people who like a pairing you hate?
Not particularly.
If so, aren't you ashamed of yourself?
You’re fond of asking questions that ignore the previous answer, aren’t you?
Misc:
What's a good website for Naruto?
I rarely stray beyond fanfiction, photobucket, and onemanga
Another?
… see above
And one more?
I really don’t like you.
What's a good Naruto fanfiction?
DancingDragonBlaze, Catriana, and Owai
And another?
…
What's a good Naruto fanart?
Anything drawn well
And another?
What do you think about Asuma?
Wasn't he awesome when he saved Shikamaru that time?
He showed us his mad skillz didn't he?
Sasuke looked really cool when his curse seal first activated, right?
What do you think of Orochimaru's tongue?
Does it disturb you?
Does it haunt your dreams at night?
Do you think Orochimaru is a sexy beast?
Do you think I'm insane for asking that?
If you could be any Naruto character, who would you be?
Why?
What jutsu would you want?
Do you think if a girl used sexy no jutsu she would turn into a man?
Say something random about Naruto or a random Naruto quote!
Did you enjoy this survey?
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