![]() My Ideal Fics: Harry Potter: Dumbledore keeps trying to turn life around him into a musical by randomly inserting song and dance numbers that no one else follows (until the very last chapter) Snape has no clue "Who the hell" Harry Potter is, and emphatically repeats said statement every time Harry tries to make him acknowledge his existence McGonagall is actually quite timid and tries to avoid confrontations whenever possible Trelawney can ACTUALLY predict the future, but tries to make everything she sees into a joke Flitwick becomes a raving lunatic anytime someone mentions his small stature Hagrid has a gambling addiction with hippogriff racing Voldemort has moments where he freezes in sheer incomprehension of the stupidity of the morons he surrounds himself with Lucius Malfoy gives to charities (in secret of course) Bellatrix Lestrange has a secret ambition to become the worlds best cook and has hated Molly Weasley ever since she lost to her at the county bake off in '76 Draco Malfoy makes plans to go on a exotic vacation to New Zealand Nymphadora Tonks can stay just the way she is (because she is badass already) Sirius Black gets his kicks by playing tag with the aurors Remus Lupin never found out he was a werewolf. He ironically keeps finding himself in situations just like his favorite super hero Bruce Banner/The Hulk on full moons and questions if he is actually the Hulk. Peter Pettigrew is the true mastermind behind the mastermind (and no one sees it coming, despite the fact that he had access all year to a weakened baby Voldemort) Hermione Granger is constantly on the verge of creating "the next best thing since toasted bread" but can never quite get it just right Ron Weasley is a completely normal teenager. Absolutely nothing abnormal about him...right? The Twins actually have complex characters besides pranking, quidditch, and the three chaser girls on the Gryffindor Quidditch Team Ginny Weasley just can't stop getting into fights Percy Weasley is actually a secret agent for magical MI6 Bill Weasley wears a fedora and hates snakes Charlie Weasley keeps finding himself in situations that could only happen in anime/manga (For Example, Fairy Tail Dragon Slayers) Harry Potter is whatever the hell the author expects him to be, as usual for the protagonist. Somedays though, he feels like breaking the fourth wall to question the author/audience about some things and for advice. Baptism Rite: Kirei Kotomine "I will kill. I will let live. I will harm and heal. None will escape me. None will escape my sight. Be crushed. Lemon Rant: Cave Johnson "Alright I've been thinking; when life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back!! Get Mad!! I don't want your damn lemons, what am I supposed to to with these? Demand to see life's manager. Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons. Do you know who I am? I'm the man whose gonna burn your house down!! With the lemons. I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down! |
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