Writer from the Black Lagoon
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Joined 09-26-10, id: 2555141, Profile Updated: 11-29-10
Author has written 2 stories for Team Fortress 2, and Leverage.

Here's my approach to writing-If there's nothing going wrong, it's fine.

Here's my approach to life-No, it doesn't make sense, and no, I don't know why, so stop asking dumb questions and try to enjoy yourself when you can, moron!



For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. bolded ones apply to me
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLOND, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend.
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll..
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
I'm a STONER so I MUST be going in the wrong direction
I'm a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude
I'm STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil (So I’ve been told)
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY, so I MUST be a spoiled brat.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read COMICS, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse.
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist.
I’m a CROSS DRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak.
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm an ONLY CHILD so I MUST be spoiled.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be and OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast
I like GAMES, ANIME and/or COMICS, so I MUST be childish
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian.
I CURSE a lot, so I MUST be a rebel.
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting
I love MARCHING BAND, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I wear GLASSES, so I MUST be a nerd.
I'm a TOMBOY, so I MUST be lesbian.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I'm a TOMBOY, so I MUST have no female friends.
I don't have many FRIENDS, so I MUST be unpopular
I am AGRESSIVE, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GIRL, so I MUST love pink
I write Fanfics, so I MUST be a freak

And for those of you wondering-I have 2 passports, so I can be Irish and American. (I might have to pick and choose sometime though...)

1. YOUR REAL NAME:

Aife (It's said Eefa, no, it doesn't make sense. Such is life.)

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME:(first 3 letters of real name plus izzle)

Aifizzle. (WTF?)

3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (fav color and fav animal):

Blue Sparrow (Um, uh, what?!)

4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, and current street name):

Niamh Autumn Ridge. (HELL NO!)

5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, last 3 letters of mom's maiden name):

Nicaitie (Seriously, who makes these up!)

6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (2nd favorite color, favorite drink):

White Coke (Oops, I'm a druggie. So much for being a superhero!)

7. YOUR ARAB NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of you dad's middle name, 1st letter of a sibling's first name, last letter of your mom's middle name)

Ichealn (Well, not so bad...especially compared to "Niamh Autumn Ridge"...)

8. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (mother's middle name):

Lynn

9. YOUR GOTH NAME: (black, and the name of one your pets):

Black Nothing. (Yeah, no pets.)

Stuff will be added when I get bored.

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Fortress Manhattan by Flygon Pirate reviews
Sequel to POTF. Nicole is back home in New York City. Everything was back to normal, until the RED Team and the BLU Spy come over for a visit. To make things more of a mess, the RED Spy and TentaSpy return with different plots in mind for her.
Team Fortress 2 - Rated: T - English - Adventure - Chapters: 62 - Words: 140,970 - Reviews: 497 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 6/27/2011 - Published: 4/5/2010 - Complete
Nations' Girl by Sho-A0YCupid reviews
It started as a normal day for all the nations in a meeting when a mysterious girl appeared out of nowhere from a magic circle. Lengthened summary inside. Mainly GerIta, other pairings to be discovered later in the fic. T for now. Part 1 of 3
Hetalia - Axis Powers - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 25 - Words: 111,412 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 80 - Follows: 29 - Updated: 5/30/2011 - Published: 1/17/2011 - Germany, N. Italy - Complete
To Dream in Black and White by Ravenwisker reviews
When team members start being assassinated with no help of the opposing team, questions arise as to who is doing it and why. Fem oc engineer/sniper Still questioning myself about this pairing, but I'll make it work. T for gore and cursing, may change
Team Fortress 2 - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,343 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 7 - Updated: 12/29/2010 - Published: 8/25/2010 - Engineer, Sniper
The Secret Santa by art1st4786 reviews
Upon being snowed in at the RED base at Coldfront with no way to go home to their families for Christmas, a certain member of RED decides to bring Christmas to his teammates on Christmas Eve. Rated for mild language. Contains fluff.
Team Fortress 2 - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,724 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 74 - Follows: 10 - Published: 12/13/2010 - Soldier, Scout - Complete
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Dropped into Madness, Well, Maybe reviews
OC Story. What do you do when dropped into war? Rated T for language and references.
Team Fortress 2 - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Drama - Chapters: 15 - Words: 24,667 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 13 - Follows: 10 - Updated: 10/13/2011 - Published: 10/3/2010 - Complete
The Gray Chessboard reviews
General team-fic. It's CHRISTMAS! Spoilers for Ho Ho Ho Job in particular, as well as Rashomon Job. General bout of nonsense that popped into my head. H/P and S/N. Eliot is all alone. Poor baby. One-shot.
Leverage - Rated: K+ - English - Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,939 - Reviews: 1 - Favs: 12 - Published: 12/13/2010 - Nathan F. - Complete