Hey Everyone,

Couples I think should be together:

Tiva (Tony and Ziva from NCIS)= They should be together!!!!!!! I really want them to get together and would be perfect together. I hope they get together

Caskett( Rick Castle and Kate Beckett from Castle)= Should be together. I mean on "Knockout" Castle even said he loved Kate

Jisbon( Jane and Lisbon)= They would be a good couple. Have to see how things worked out but I've only just started watching

Stella and Mac from CSI New York= I really hope Stella comes back. She and Mac would've been great together but then she left. BUt she could come back like Grissom did on the regular CSI

Also, I do love copying and pasting:

“ Yes Every time we sell a piece of our souls we buy glass.” - Alisha Florrick The Good Wife
"He irks me. He's irksome."- Patrick Jane
"(To friend that called for his help, because she was the main murder suspect) If you're ever guilty, don't call me; just go to Brazil." - jane
"Honestly, it's not as bad as it looks."- jane
"Oh, come on, guys. I just robbed a Russian mobster. You can't call Lisbon?"- jane
"If I tell you how it's done, the magic circle will send a team of assassins to kill us all. It's the law."- jane
"She does the detecting and I do the insulting."- jane
"Things are getting weird, we're off to see a witch."- lisbon
"(To the local Sheriff) We don't help, we take over."- lisbon
"You should put a flashlight underneath your chin just to complete the effect."- lisbon
"Oh, in the context of someone letting himself get hypnotized, nearly throwing his colleague off a building, and then finally being able to overpower a small crazy woman to retrieve the situation? You did okay."- lisbon
"Go to hell. Take a toothbrush!"- Lisbon
FRIENDS/BEST FRIENDS
FRIENDS: Will comfort you when he rejects you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"
FRIENDS: Will be there for you when he breaks up with you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will call him up and whisper, "Seven days..."
FRIENDS: Helps you find your prince.
BEST FRIENDS: Kidnaps him and brings him to you.
FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.
FRIENDS: Will help you move.
BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.
FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.
FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!
FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "DAMN!" we messed up!"
FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.
FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.
FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...
FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.
FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.
FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Girl drink the rest of that ! You know we don't waste!"
FRIENDS: Would read ignore this

Only in America
1.Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
2. Only in America...are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.
3. Only in America...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
4. Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
5. Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
6. Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
7. Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
8. Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
9. Only in America...do they have drive-up ATM's with Braille lettering.
You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same.*
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.
If you can't laugh at yourself, make fun of other people.
I'm not insensitive, I just don't care.
When the going gets tough, the tough get duct tape.*
I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
The longer I live, the more convinced am I that this planet is used by other planets as a lunatic asylum.*
Some people think I'm insane. If you've ever been called insane before, copy this and put it in your profile.
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile.*
If ignorance is bliss, then why is there school? (good question)
Dumb man fish on land, smart man fish on boat, dead man fish in middle.
The solution to skin cancer…become nocturnal
Strange is only a matter or perspective
When you're little, toys are colorful chunks of plastic. When you're older, they're something that's potentially dangerous.
I reject your reality and substitute it with my own.
If you have ever run into a door, copy this
If you have run into a window that you thought was an open door, copy this
92 percent of the teenage population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said that it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Put this in your profile if you're part of that 8 percent that would be laughing their bums off.*
Being mature is overrated.*
Being weird is like being normal, only better.
I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me.*
Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright.
One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.
Silence is golden, duct tape is silver
Life is like a pack of gum . . . I've yet to figure out why.*
Be insane . . . because well behaved girls never made history.*
If your name is Mr.Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?
Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out.*
A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."*
To the world, you are just one person, but to one person, you are the world*
One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.*
It’s always the last place you look. Of course it is why I would keep looking after I found it.
Person #1: Happiness is just around the corner!
Person #2: Too bad the world is round!*
Growing old is mandatory . . . growing up is optional . . .
We fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But we teenage girls are good at 2 things: Staying Strong, and Being Ourselves.*
Life was so simple when boys had cooties!
Mothers of teens know why some animals eat their young.
I'm not random, I just have many thougt- OH! A SQUIRREL!*
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird.
Organized people are just too lazy to look for things.
Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun!
The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not
Take my advice, I don't use it anyway.
Robbers stab you in the stomach. Boyfriends stab you in the heart. Friends stab you in the back. Best friends don't carry knives.*
"Dreams are like a podcast,
Downloading truth in my ears.
They tell me cool stuff."
I have short term memory loss. I have short term memory loss. I have short term memory loss.
Don't follow in my footsteps; I tend to walk into walls.*
Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night."
Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic. No more to say for that.*(This might be a good life lesson)
People who say it can't be done should not interrupt those of us who are doing it.
"What happens if you get scared half to death twice?"
Why is it that some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?
It is wise to walk a mile in a man's shoes before judging him... That way you're a mile away and you have his shoes.
I don't obsess! I think intensely.
Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them?
Apparently 1 in 5 people are Chinese; there are five people in my family so it must be one of them. it's ether my mom or dad, or my older brother Collin, or my younger brother Ho-chan-chu, but I think it's Colin.
"I know water doesn't bite! What a stupid thing to say! Water doesn't have to bite you! You drown in it you moron!"
"You know, I do not think that means what you think it means." Inigo Montoyez
Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day but set the man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
It's all fun and games until the other person loses their sanity.
I'm not insane... i just do whatever the voices tell me to.
Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!
I smile because I have no idea what's going on!*
I make the cowardly lion look like the terminator!*(OK, so i
People who say anything's possible haven't tried to slam a revolving door.
"You mean they're taking the thoughts we think we thought and making them thoughts we think we thought... I think."
"What you call dog with no legs?Don't matter what you call him, he ain't gonna come."
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."
"I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places."
"Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together."
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
When life hands you lemons, throw those lemons back and tell life to make its own dang lemonade
"Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together."*
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
Darth Vader- "Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!
Luke Skywalker- "Nah, the rebels have cake."
Darth Vader- "ooh! Can I be a rebel?!"*
I’m the type of girl who will burst out laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday
“When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.”
My best friends are the kind that if my house were on fire, they'd be roasting marsh mellows and flirting with the firemen.
“ Shut it, voices, or I’ll poke you with a spork!”
The dinosaur’s extinction wasn’t an accident. Barney came and they all commited suicide
NCIS PROVERBS (Taken from NCIS Wetpaint Wiki)
1. If you leave the door open, the iguana might come in
2. Never mess with silver haired snipers
3. Some people are born great, some people have greatness thrust upon them...and some people are DiNozzo
4. Human lie detectors come in nice packages, silver wrapping and are called Gibbs
5. Opportunity is often missed because it is dressed in overalls and looks like hard work. Tony's talent is often missed because it is dressed in a Hawaiian shirt and looks like fun
6. Ask not what the boat in the basement does for you, but what you can do for the boat in the basement
You know that you're addicted to NCIS when...
1. You have seen every episode several times and still never get tired of it.
2. You will yell if someone tries bothers you on Tuesday night when you are watching a new episode of NCIS.
3. You find yourself Gibbs slapping people. (Or yourself)
4. You have had a dream about it or involving one of the characters.
5. You daze out while sitting at your desk and imagine yourself running alongside Tony and Ziva with your gun drawn yelling, "Federal agents! Drop your weapon!"
6. You watch the movies that Tony has mentioned. As many as humanly possible that is.
7. You wish USA would put more than just three episodes a night on.
8. You have started using military references. Hit the head, scuttle butt, hit the rack, etc.
9. The majority of television you watch is of NCIS.
10. You smell something funny or hear a beeping sound and your mind goes to a chemical attack or a bomb.
11. You call people Probie and use McNicknames.
12. Your dog goes missing and you say to, "Put out a BOLO."
13. You try and convince every person you meet to watch it.
14. You use the term Hinky.
15. When anyone says your obsessed, you reply starts "Yeah, Gibbs would say that."
16. You have hooked your family and friends as well
17. On Tuesday your friends ask and answer the question, “ What are you doing tonight? Oh wait, its Tuesday, never mind.”
18. You make it a point to drink coffee black
19. You attempt to dress up as one of the characters on Halloween
20. You reference NCIS in your homework
21. When your friend can’t remember where he/she parked, you say “ Put a BOLO out.”

Rule #1: Never let suspects stay together

Rule #1: Never screw over your partner.

Rule #2: Always wear gloves at a crime scene.

Rule #3: Don't believe what you're told. Double check.

Rule #3: Never be unreachable.

Rule #4: The best way to keep a secret? Keep it to yourself.Second best? Tell one other person - if you must.There is no third best

Rule #5: You don't waste good.

Rule #6: Never apologize — Its a sign of weakness.

Rule #7: Always be specific when you lie.

Rule #8: Never take anything for granted.

Rule #9: Never go anywhere without a knife

Rule #10: Never get personally involved on a case.

Rule #11: When the job is done, walk away.

Rule #12: Never date a coworker.

Rule #13: Never, ever involve a lawyer

Rule #15: Always work as a team.

Rule #16: If someone thinks they have the upper-hand, …break it!

Rule #18: It's better to seek forgiveness than ask permission

Rule #22: Never, ever bother Gibbs in interrogation

Rule #23: Never mess with a Marine's coffee if you want to live.

Rule #27: Two ways to follow: First way, they never notice you, — second way, they only notice you.

Rule #35: Always watch the watchers.

Rule #38: Your case, your lead.

Rule #39: There is no such thing as coincidence.

"The 40's are for Emergency Use Only!"

Rule #40: If it seems someone is out to get you, they are.

Rule #44: First things first. Hide the women and children

Rule #45: Clean up your own mess.

Rule #51: Sometimes — You're Wrong!

Galdelf: HAVE U BEEN EAVESDROPPING?
Sam: i haven't been dropping no eaves sir, honest! i just wanted to come in and try to get a bit of a close up, i mean, u had one and frodo had one and-
Galdelf: * flicks hair back*NO, NO NO, NO, NO, it's too late for? that. *pushes Sam off desk and takes up entire screen grinning and smiling*
Sam: I JUST WANTED TO BE APART OF THIS MOVIE! *gets up* it could be a love scene. *kisses Galdelf*

Galdelf: * Walks up to the door baracaded with 3 weapons* What do you think-?! WHAT IS THIS?! WHAT GOOD IS THIS?!?! *walks up and pokes one of the weapons with his staff* THAT”S TYPICAL ELF WORK * walks off*
One ring to rule them all… the rest sold seperatly

Ultimate TV Show Quotes ( I don’t own any)
Does dealing with sexual deviance affect me? The answer is no. You can ask my blow up doll." -John Munch, SVU
"Now I'm a pain in my own ass." -John Munch, SVU
And I'd like your balls in a blender, but ain't life a bitch?" -Olivia Benson, SVU
"Thank you. You've offered a provocative theory. What it lacks in substance, it makes up for in pretty colors." -Alex Cabot, SVU
"Civil liberties, good. Lawyers, bad." -John Munch, SVU
"Don't look at me. I just know stuff." -Fin Tutuola, SVU
"It's a case of he said, she said, he's dead." -Don Cragen, SVU
"Sometimes all that brooding intensity is just annoying." -ME Warner about Elliot Stabler, SVU
"I'd give you my kidney." "Not if I gave you mine first." -Elliot Stabler and Olivia Benson, SVU
"I doubt it seriously, but hey, stranger things have happened. I'd get it on with Benson. Sure, bring her on! I'm not afraid." --Chris Meloni regarding the possiblities of an on-the-job romance
"Anywhere you go with Mariska, the parade follows." - Chris Meloni
"Hot detective love. Is it wrong?" - Chris Meloni about his now infamous liplock with Mariska
“ Yes Every time we sell a piece of our souls we buy glass.” - Alisha Florrick The Good Wife
"He irks me. He's irksome."- Patrick Jane
"(To friend that called for his help, because she was the main murder suspect) If you're ever guilty, don't call me; just go to Brazil." - jane
"Honestly, it's not as bad as it looks."- jane
"Oh, come on, guys. I just robbed a Russian mobster. You can't call Lisbon?"- jane
"If I tell you how it's done, the magic circle will send a team of assassins to kill us all. It's the law."- jane
"She does the detecting and I do the insulting."- jane
"Things are getting weird, we're off to see a witch."- lisbon
"(To the local Sheriff) We don't help, we take over."- lisbon
"You should put a flashlight underneath your chin just to complete the effect."- lisbon
"Oh, in the context of someone letting himself get hypnotized, nearly throwing his colleague off a building, and then finally being able to overpower a small crazy woman to retrieve the situation? You did okay."- lisbon
"Go to hell. Take a toothbrush!"- Lisbon

You laugh because I'm different. I laugh because you're all the same.*
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.
If you can't laugh at yourself, make fun of other people.
I'm not insensitive, I just don't care.
When the going gets tough, the tough get duct tape.*
I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
The longer I live, the more convinced am I that this planet is used by other planets as a lunatic asylum.*
Some people think I'm insane. If you've ever been called insane before, copy this and put it in your profile.
93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile.*
If ignorance is bliss, then why is there school? (good question)
Dumb man fish on land, smart man fish on boat, dead man fish in middle.
The solution to skin cancer…become nocturnal
Strange is only a matter or perspective
When you're little, toys are colorful chunks of plastic. When you're older, they're something that's potentially dangerous.
I reject your reality and substitute it with my own.
If you have ever run into a door, copy this
If you have run into a window that you thought was an open door, copy this
92 percent of the teenage population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said that it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Put this in your profile if you're part of that 8 percent that would be laughing their bums off.*
Being mature is overrated.*
Being weird is like being normal, only better.
I'm not clumsy! The floor just hates me.*
Boys are like lava lamps, fun to watch but not too bright.
One day, we will look back on this, laugh nervously, and change the subject.
Silence is golden, duct tape is silver
Life is like a pack of gum . . . I've yet to figure out why.*
Be insane . . . because well behaved girls never made history.*
If your name is Mr.Crunch, and you joined the Navy, would you eventually be Captain Crunch?
Your weirdness is creeping my imaginary friend out.*
A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."*
To the world, you are just one person, but to one person, you are the world*
One day your prince will come. Mine? Oh he took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions.*
It’s always the last place you look. Of course it is why I would keep looking after I found it.
Person #1: Happiness is just around the corner!
Person #2: Too bad the world is round!*
Growing old is mandatory . . . growing up is optional . . .
We fall for stupid boys, we make lots of dumb mistakes, we like to act stupid, talk really fast, and laugh really loud. But we teenage girls are good at 2 things: Staying Strong, and Being Ourselves.*
Life was so simple when boys had cooties!
Mothers of teens know why some animals eat their young.
I'm not random, I just have many thougt- OH! A SQUIRREL!*
There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird.
Organized people are just too lazy to look for things.
Don't run in the school hall, gliding is more fun!
The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not
Take my advice, I don't use it anyway.
Robbers stab you in the stomach. Boyfriends stab you in the heart. Friends stab you in the back. Best friends don't carry knives.*
"Dreams are like a podcast,
Downloading truth in my ears.
They tell me cool stuff."
I have short term memory loss. I have short term memory loss. I have short term memory loss.
Don't follow in my footsteps; I tend to walk into walls.*
Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night."
Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic. No more to say for that.*(This might be a good life lesson)
People who say it can't be done should not interrupt those of us who are doing it.
"What happens if you get scared half to death twice?"
Why is it that some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?
It is wise to walk a mile in a man's shoes before judging him... That way you're a mile away and you have his shoes.
I don't obsess! I think intensely.
Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them?
Apparently 1 in 5 people are Chinese; there are five people in my family so it must be one of them. it's ether my mom or dad, or my older brother Collin, or my younger brother Ho-chan-chu, but I think it's Colin.
"I know water doesn't bite! What a stupid thing to say! Water doesn't have to bite you! You drown in it you moron!"
"You know, I do not think that means what you think it means." Inigo Montoyez
Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day but set the man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
It's all fun and games until the other person loses their sanity.
I'm not insane... i just do whatever the voices tell me to.
Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!
I smile because I have no idea what's going on!*
I make the cowardly lion look like the terminator!*(OK, so i
People who say anything's possible haven't tried to slam a revolving door.
"You mean they're taking the thoughts we think we thought and making them thoughts we think we thought... I think."
"What you call dog with no legs?Don't matter what you call him, he ain't gonna come."
"Flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."
"I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places."
"Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together."
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
When life hands you lemons, throw those lemons back and tell life to make its own dang lemonade
"Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together."*
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
Darth Vader- "Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!
Luke Skywalker- "Nah, the rebels have cake."
Darth Vader- "ooh! Can I be a rebel?!"*
I’m the type of girl who will burst out laughing in the middle of a dead silence because of something that happened yesterday
“When life gives you lemons, make grape juice. Then sit back and watch the world wonder how you did it.”
My best friends are the kind that if my house were on fire, they'd be roasting marsh mellows and flirting with the firemen.
“ Shut it, voices, or I’ll poke you with a spork!”
The dinosaur’s extinction wasn’t an accident. Barney came and they all commited suicide
NCIS PROVERBS (Taken from NCIS Wetpaint Wiki)
1. If you leave the door open, the iguana might come in
2. Never mess with silver haired snipers
3. Some people are born great, some people have greatness thrust upon them...and some people are DiNozzo
4. Human lie detectors come in nice packages, silver wrapping and are called Gibbs
5. Opportunity is often missed because it is dressed in overalls and looks like hard work. Tony's talent is often missed because it is dressed in a Hawaiian shirt and looks like fun
6. Ask not what the boat in the basement does for you, but what you can do for the boat in the basement
You know that you're addicted to NCIS when...
1. You have seen every episode several times and still never get tired of it.
2. You will yell if someone tries bothers you on Tuesday night when you are watching a new episode of NCIS.
3. You find yourself Gibbs slapping people. (Or yourself)
4. You have had a dream about it or involving one of the characters.
5. You daze out while sitting at your desk and imagine yourself running alongside Tony and Ziva with your gun drawn yelling, "Federal agents! Drop your weapon!"
6. You watch the movies that Tony has mentioned. As many as humanly possible that is.
7. You wish USA would put more than just three episodes a night on.
8. You have started using military references. Hit the head, scuttle butt, hit the rack, etc.
9. The majority of television you watch is of NCIS.
10. You smell something funny or hear a beeping sound and your mind goes to a chemical attack or a bomb.
11. You call people Probie and use McNicknames.
12. Your dog goes missing and you say to, "Put out a BOLO."
13. You try and convince every person you meet to watch it.
14. You use the term Hinky.
15. When anyone says your obsessed, you reply starts "Yeah, Gibbs would say that."
16. You have hooked your family and friends as well
17. On Tuesday your friends ask and answer the question, “ What are you doing tonight? Oh wait, its Tuesday, never mind.”
18. You make it a point to drink coffee black
19. You attempt to dress up as one of the characters on Halloween
20. You reference NCIS in your homework
21. When your friend can’t remember where he/she parked, you say “ Put a BOLO out.”

Galdelf: HAVE U BEEN EAVESDROPPING?
Sam: i haven't been dropping no eaves sir, honest! i just wanted to come in and try to get a bit of a close up, i mean, u had one and frodo had one and-
Galdelf: * flicks hair back*NO, NO NO, NO, NO, it's too late for? that. *pushes Sam off desk and takes up entire screen grinning and smiling*
Sam: I JUST WANTED TO BE APART OF THIS MOVIE! *gets up* it could be a love scene. *kisses Galdelf*

Galdelf: * Walks up to the door baracaded with 3 weapons* What do you think-?! WHAT IS THIS?! WHAT GOOD IS THIS?!?! *walks up and pokes one of the weapons with his staff* THAT”S TYPICAL ELF WORK * walks off*
One ring to rule them all… the rest sold seperatly
* king faced away from Aragorn*
Aragorn: “They will take you into a dark room my lord.”
Aragorn: “And scan your very skull” * King stays still and his eys slowly move towards the side where Aragorn is with a ’ Is that in the script’ look on his face*
Aragorn: “ They will make toys of your lordship” * king and everyone starts laughing*
Aragorn: “ And a thousand at least” * king turns to Aragorn laughing*
Aragorn:“ For children to play stupid games with”

1. YOUR REAL NAME
2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME:
(first 4 letters of real name izzle.)
3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME:
(fav color and fav animal)
4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME:
(your middle name and the street you live on)
5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME:
(the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name)
6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME:
(Your 2nd favorite color, and favorite soda)
7. YOUR IRAQI NAME:
(2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any
letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your moms maiden name, 3rd
letter of dad's middle name, 1st letter of a siblings first name, and
last letter of your moms middle name)
8.YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME:
(both parents middle name)
9. YOUR GOTH NAME:
(Black and the name of one of your pets)

ninja facts:
- Ninjas can divide by zero
- ninjas dont walk the ground moves for them
- when ninjas do pushups, they dont push themselves up, they push the world down
- when it rains ninjas dont wet wet, the rain gets ninja
- what ever ninjas touch turns to gold
- Ninjas do not sleep, they wait.
- Ninjas tears cure cancer, too bad they never cry
- Ninjas donate alot of blood to the red cross, just not there own..
- Ninjas make onions cry
- Ninjas are allowed to talk about fight club
- Ninjas gave cats nine lives so they could kill them more.
- Bullets dodge ninjas
- Ninjas iron there shirts while wearing them
- Ninjas can predict the songs on there ipod shuffle
- Ninjas put pants on 2 legs at a time
- Ninjas play minesweeper with real mines
- Ninjas taught kool aid man how to break though walls
- Ninjas created the wheel. Twice.
- A ninja once recieved a hollywood star, he made the handprint when the cement was dry.
- Ninjas are circumcised. They perform it themselves.
- In an average living room there are 1,242 objects ninjas could use to kill you, including the room itself.

Harry Potter Jokes

1) Proffesor Flitwick is not Bilbo Baggains

2) I will not sing "We're Off to See the Wizard" when sent to the Headmaster's office.

3) I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class

4) I will not, under any circumstances, ask Harry Potter who died and made him boss

5) Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda

6) Remus Lupin does not want a flea collar

7) First years are not allowed to be fed to Fluffy

8) I will not make any jokes about Lupin and his "time of the month"

9) I will not give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they're real animals

10) I will not sing the Badger Song during Hufflepuff-Slytherin quidditch matches

12) When Death Eaters are attacking Hogsmeade, I shall not point at the Dark Mark and shout "To the Batmoblie, Robin!"

13) When a class-mate falls asleep, I shall not take advantage of the fact and draw a Dark Mark on his arm.

14) It's not necessary for me to yell "BURN!" every time Snape takes house points from Gryffindor

15) Any resemblance between Dementors and Nazgul is simply coincidental

16) I will not refer to the Weasley Twins as "bookends"

17) I will not scare the Arithmancy students with my Calculus book.

18) I will not hold my wand in the air before I casting spells shouting "I got the power!"

19) Its not necessary for me to yell "Bamf!" everytime I apparate.

20) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music when wandering the halls.

21) "To conquer the earth with flying monkeys" is not an appropriate career choice.

22) I am not allowed to make lightsaber sounds with my wand.

23) I am not allowed to paint the house elves blue and call them smurfs.

24) I am not allowed to use Proffesors Snape's head as a bludger.

25) I will not say the phrase "Dude, get a life" to Voldemort.

26) Should I chance to see a Death Eater wearing a white mask, I should not start singing anything from The Phantom of the Opera.

27) I will not refer to the Accio charm as "the Force".

28) I will not call Dumbledore "Santa Claus!" during the Christmas Holidays.

29) I will not put Muggle fairy book in the History section at the library.

30) I will not send Snape a bottle of shampoo for Christmas.

31.)I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "I told you I was hardcore".

32.)House elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers.

33.) Starting a betting pool on the fate of this year's Defense Against Dark Arts teacher is tasteless and tacky, not a
clever moneymaking concept.

34.)I am not allowed to tell Hufflepuffs there is no Santa Clause.

35.) I am not allowed to refer to myself as the New Dark Lord.

36.)I am not allowed to sneak into Professor Snapes private chambers to watch him sing I Will Survive in the mirror, as it is disturbing.

37.) I am not allowed to steal Professor Flitwicks wand, hold it over my head and laugh as he tries to reach it.

38.)I will not replace Madam Pomfrey's Skele-Gro with pumpkin juice.

39.) I will not replace Professor Snape's pumpkin juice with Skele-Gro.

40.) I will not impersonate the Swedish Chef in Potions class.

41.) The next time that I see Rita Skeeter, I am not to threaten her with a can of Raid.

42.) I will not subvert the lock on the fourth-floor girls' bathroom and sell its location to first-years as "The Chamber of Secrets".

43.) When applying for a post at the Ministry of Magic after graduation, I should not cite "Fred and George Weasley" as my greatest influence at Hogwarts.

44.) Putting down "Lord Voldemort" is probably not best either.

45.) A Muggle "vacuum cleaner" is not acceptable Quidditch equipment, even if it has been enchanted to fly.

46.) Hogsmeade village is not "a wretched hive of scum and villainy. "

47.) I will not tell Professor Trelawney that I prophesied her death.

48.) I will also not tell Professor Trelawney that I had a vision of her killing the Dark Lord.

49.) Sending rings to the nine senior faculty at Yuletide, with the return address "Voldemort", is not funny.

50.) Insisting that the school acquire computers and network the buildings is a pointless request as they claim that a quill and parchment is sufficient.

51.) Calling the Ghostbusters is a cruel joke to play on the resident ghosts and poltergeists.

52.) I may not have a private army.

53.) I must not substitute chocolate-flavored laxative for Professor Lupin's prescription-strength chocolate.

54.) Nor am I to in any way substitute, alter, hide, or otherwise tamper with Professor Dumbledore's candy.

55.) I am not the wicked witch of the west.

56.) -I will not refer to Professor Umbridge as such either.

57.) I will not melt if water is poured over me.

58.) -Neither will Professor Umbridge.

59.) I shouldn't use Photoshop to create incriminating photos of my house prefects or tutors.

60.) I will not enchant the Golden Snitch to fly up the nearest fan's nose.

61.) I do not know the Avada Kedavra curse, and pretending I do to people who annoy me is not funny, no matter how much they injure themselves diving for cover.

62.) I will not test my Potions assigments by spiking Snape's drink with them.

63.) - Especially not all of them at once or the posions (massive shame).

64.) I will not try to hock off my old piercings as "priceless Muggle artifacts."

65.) I will not claim my X-Files tapes are "Auror Training Videos."

66.) Professor Snape definitely does not have pointed ears, and under no circumstances is he to be addressed as 'Spock'.

67.) I am not able to see the Grim Reaper, nor am I to claim that he is standing by the Headmaster, tapping an hourglass and looking at him impatiently. Or, for that matter, Harry Potter.

68.) When being interrogated by a member of staff, I am not to wave my hand and announce 'These are not the droids you are looking for'.

69.) Thestrals do not resemble the Muggle toys known as 'My Little Pony'.

70.) The four Houses are not the Morons, the Borons, the Smarts and the Junior Death Eaters.

71.) I am not authorized to negotiate a peace treaty with Voldemort.

72.) Despite my personal beliefs, Quidditch would not be improved by the introduction of muggle firearms.

73.) Though they are doubtless more athletic, battle-axes are not acceptable either.

74.) I will not claim there is a prequel to Hogwarts, A History that explains about Bilbo Baggins.

75.) I will not use the Marauder's Map for stalking purposes.

76.) I am not allowed to introduce Peeves to paintballing.

77.) I am not allowed to ask Professor Dumbledore if the size of his beard is 'compensating for something'.

78.) I will not create a betting pool on that Voldemort is Harry Potter's father.

79.) Headmaster Dumbledore is of no relation to Willy Wonka.

80.) Professor Snape's proper given name is not Princess Silvermoon Fairywing GlimmerMcSparkles.

81.) I will not take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.

82.) Harry Potter and Ron Weasley are not the magical equivalent of "Batman and Robin".

83.) I will not play the Imperial March theme for Professor Snape.

84.). - However, when Lucius Malfoy visits, I may play it.

85.) If I insist on carrying out my plans of producing "Riddle-de-dee: The Voldemort Musical", I will do so under a nom-de-plume.

86.) I will not attempt to recruit the title character to play himself. Even if he looks good in tap shoes.

87.) I should not refer to Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle collectively as "Team Rocket" either.

88.) I am not allowed to discuss my theory that Voldemort is actually the second cousin of Sauron.

89.) I am not a 'ninja sent here by Lord Voldemort to destroy Harry Potter' and should stop shouting this at meal times.

90.) It's not tasteful to approach Cho wearing a shirt that says All the good looking ones die young with a picture of Cedric Diggory on it.

91.) I will not yell "Hey look It's Lord Voldemort!" at Hogsmeade

92.) I will not tease Voldemort about the time he needed his pink flowery teddy bear to comfort him when he had that bad bad nightmare about Harry

93.) I will not charm a poster of Britney Spears on Draco's wall

94.) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work."

95.) I will not use my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot.

96.) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it.

97.) I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive.

98.) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast.

99.) I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day."

100.) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling.

101.) I will not steal Godrick Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways.

102.) I will not dress ask Voldemort if he is Darth Vader.

103.) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself to seriously.

104.) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knight's Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions.

105.) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet.

106.) I am not allowed to begin each Herbology class by singing the theme song to "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes."

107.) I will not dress up as Voldemort for Halloween.

108.) I will not call Professor McGonagall "McGoogles".

109.) I will not sing the entire Multiplication Rocks series during Arithmacy exams.

110.) Dumbledore is not Gandalf, and the Triforce is not hidden in Hogwarts.

111.) There is no such thing as the chamber of Double Secret Probation.

112.) My name is not "The Dark Lord Happy-Pants" I am not allowed to sign my papers as such.

113.) Bringing fortune cookies to divination class does not count for extra credit.

114.) I will not douse Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak with lemon juice to see if he will become visible while wearing it and standing by the fire in the common room.

115.) I will not tell first years they should build a tree house in the Whomping Willow.

116.) I will not teach the house elves to impersonate Jar Jar Binks.

117.) I will not give Gryffindors pixie sticks.

118.) I am not allowed to refer to Susan Bones, Hannah Abbot, and Justin Finch-Fletchley as Blossom, Buttercup, and Bubbles.

119.) A time turner is not a flux capacitator I should therefore not try to install it in a muggle car.

120.) I shall not refer to DADA professors as canaries in a coal mine.

121.) When fighting deatheaters in the annual June good vs. evil fight I will not lift my wand skyward and shout "There can only be ONE".

122.) A wand is for magic only, it is not for picking noses, playing snooker, or playing drums no matter how bored I become.

123.) It is generally accepted that cats and dragons can not interbreed and I should not attempt to disprove this theory no matter how wicked the results would be.

124.) 42 is not the answer to every question on the O.W.L.S.

125.) I am allowed to have a cat, rat, toad, or an owl. I am not allowed to have reticulated python, snow leopard, Tasmanian devil, or piranha.

126.) No matter how good an Australian accent I can do I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class.

127.) I will not refer to the Defense against the Dark arts professor as Kenny, even if he is wearing an orange anorak.

128.) If Dumbledore burst into a room or casts a spell, I will not say "Gods has come to save us".

129.) I am not aloud to say that the Weasely family are not natural red heads.

130.) It is not funny too place a bet on the fact that Voldemort will beat Harry Potter.

131.) I am not aloud to bring Percy Jackson too the school and claim that it is Harry Potters twin.

132.) Nor am I aloud to do th esame with Hermoine and Annabeth Chase.

133.) It is problay not a good idea to refer to Dumbledore as Obi-wan-Kenobi.

134.) When someone performs a spell I am not aloud to say "The force is strong in you".

135.) Despite how funny it is I am not aloud to hide Blast-Ended Skrewt in peoples trunks.

136.) I am not aloud to give people orange soda and tell them it is a potion that will protect them from all damage. I am then not aloud to direct them to a certain point in the Forrbiden Forest saying that there are jewles there and that the potion will save them from the creatures.

I'm a Potter head, if you are too copy this onto your profile