Name: Rainstripe

"A hero has the power to move the world. A true hero has the power to destroy the world but chooses not to despite what the world thinks of them." -Joseph Patrick Lyons

Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.

"Do not argue with an idiot, he will drag you down to his level and beat you with
experience"

"There are few problems that can’t be solved with high explosives"

"I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I'll get in trouble no matter what."

Good friends give you a ride. Close friends buy you a car. Best friends are the getting-away-from-the-scene-of-the-crime driver.

"Flying is merely what happens when you throw yourself at the ground and miss."

A straight line may be the shortest route between two points, but it is by no means the most interesting...

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.

i hate it wen the voices argue wit my imaginary friends

Never interrupt your opponent while he’s making a mistake.

I think crime pays. The hours are good, you travel a lot.

"People fear the strange and unusual. I am the strange and unusual."

How can I think outside of the box, if they won't let me out of it?

Children in frontseats can lead to accidents. Accidents in backseats can lead to children.

I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers.

Being normal is overrated.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE that it's weird

I've got ADD and magic markers. Oh the fun I will have

You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor

"When all else fails blow shit up."

I got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.

I am going to put an end to my procrastination problem. . . Tomorrow

I'm not insensitive, I just don't care

The evil gnomes poked me in the bum wit a stick.

Would you like a cookie? So would I.

Don't take it personally.. but you smell like an ice cube

Well the voices and I took a vote. It's unanimous; you suck.

Don't make me mad...I'm known to bite at random!!

Don't ever attempt a staring contest with a brick wall, they cheat a lot

I'm hearing voices in my head and they don't like you!

Don't walk in my footsteps. I walk into walls.

I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

I put the 'fun' in 'dysfunctional'.

What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere? 'Hold my purse.'

yo-yos were invented as a weapon

That which does not kill me had better run pretty dang fast.

If you're forced to choose between two evils, choose the one you've never tried before. ;)

Yes, I am insane, but every now and then I have these horrible periods of boredom where I have to be normal like you.

I did what they say and chose the road less traveled... Now where the heck am I?

We're all going to die...but I got a helmet.

There's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, it's usually an oncoming express train.

When people don't laugh at our jokes, I don't think of it as a "You had to be there," thing. I think of it as a "You have to be clinically insane like us," thing.

If you ever stop to wonder if you have insane mental problems, then it's already too late for you. It's sad, but true.

If it weren't for physics and law enforcement, I'd be unstoppable.

My day isn't complete until I have freaked out a complete stranger.

We're all pretty bizarre. Some are just better at showing it.

I don't know what my problem is, but I do know its hard to pronounce.

The pen is mightier than the sword; no-one expects you to attack them with a pen.

I could never find another man like you...Hell, half the time I can't even find where I parked the car.

I once gave up anime; it was the most terrifying weekend of my life.

Knowledge is power and power corrupts. Study hard; be evil.

You are NOT a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are made of the same decaying organic matter as everyone else.

You have the right to swing first. However, if you choose to swing first, any move you make can and will be used as an excuse to beat the shit out of you. You have the right to have a doctor and a priest present. If you cannot afford a doctor or are not presently attending a church of your choice, one will be appointed to you. Do you understand what I just told you, Asshole??

After a year in therapy my psychiatrist said to me, "Well, maybe life isn't for everyone."

Evil Minions; not always as useful as one would hope.

Buckle up!! It makes it harder for the aliens to suck you out of your car.

That's when I started breaking into people's houses. I didn't steal anything, but I did rearrange their furniture.

You laugh because I'm a little different; I laugh because I rigged your house with explosives.

Seeing Sasuke making funny faces amuses me greatly.

You can't make a person love you...You can only stalk them and hope for the best.

Slinky Escalator = Everlasting fun.

You know, just once I would like to meet an alien menace that wasn't immune to bullets.

I may not look like much, but I'm a pro at pretending to be a ninja.

Beware of women with kunai.

Do Not Disturb: Plotting

Stupid weatherman...Sunny and clear my ass.

"If you think nobody cares you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments."

People are like slinkies, basically useless. And yet it's so amusing to watch them fall down the stairs.

Kids like us should wear WARNINGS.

Boys are stupid. Throw rocks at them.

You're a great friend but if the zombies chase us I'm tripping you.

It's shiny and in video game rules, it's important.

I Googled you today and I'm disturbed with what I found.

There's two kinds of people in the world, those who have a plan prepared for when the zombies take over the earth, and those who don't... We call those last people, dinner.

Stalkers are like your best friends. They just hide behind trees more.

It's a good thing I love you 'cause if I didn't, I'd call the men in white coats on you.

Hate is just a special kind of love we give to people who suck.

Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas.

Chaos, panic, pandemonium. My work here is done.

Why would I steel something that doesn't involve money...? Wait, that didn't come out right. What I meant to say was 'why would I steal something at all'. I'm a good girl.

"An apple a day will keep anyone away if you throw it hard enough." -Colbert

"Don't provoke the lunatic, alright." -Booth (Bones)

Irony: Falling down the stairs due to distraction by the "watch your step" sign.

"Never explain--your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway" -Elbert Hubbard

Careful or you'll end up in my novel.

Fighting is mind over matter. I don't mind, and you don't matter.

A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the first word you thought of. - Burt Bacharach

You have the right to remain silent. Everything you say will be misquoted and used against you.

When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it. (Unless no one knows that you're responsible for it; then it's probably best to lie low and wait for it to blow over.)

When you lose, don't lose the lesson. (And the lesson is: "Vengeance!")

"The older you get, the sooner it ends."

Insanity is just a word for "eccentric genius"

"i am not insane...i am just looking for the entrance of the kingdom of mayonnaise"

I'm not supposed to make sense! That would defeat the purpose of confusing people!

As I lay in my bed one night, and stare at the stars; I wonder...Where the heck is my ceiling?!

Drive it like you stole it!

I always wanted to be somebody, but I should have been more specific

We’re not lost. I’m just not quite sure where we are.

I didn’t escape from the mental ward! Those sirens are a complete coincidence!

You have the emotional capacity of this stapler

...not to mention that I went crazy again today.

A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."

When you're right, no one remembers. When you're wrong, no one forgets.

Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.

Sanity? I never had such a useless thing to begin with!

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

When in doubt, push random buttons!

You wanna know why God created man before woman? Every masterpiece needs a rough draft!

There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work.

I respect your opinion, I just think it's stupid.

It's not denial. I’m just selective about the reality I accept.

They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.

Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.

The secret to success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you’re good.

Yes, of course I'm perfectly civil, but that's only because I choose to direct my anger towards such fruitful pursuits as plotting your untimely and gruesome death.