Anyway, I am Darkboy77. I am evil, yet I write mostly humor. How ironic. But how evil am I?

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I'M SO EVIL THAT I WOULD WRITE SUCH AN INCREDIBLY LONG BIO, JUST SO YOU WOULD HAVE TO TAKE AN EXTRA SECOND TO SCROLL DOWN TO LOOK AT MY STORIES!*~
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Muwahaha.

_ _ _ _ If anyone actually READS these things, you're in for a treat. Why? Because it's a cookie.

Isn't that a nice text cookie? It was invented by Ron's Best Mate. Now eat it.

Now.

Anyway, my REAL NAME IS [Name withheld]!

My age is somewhere between 11 and 2,743,431,345,552,678,901,265,789,093,452,123,645,789,078,345,243,125,765,908,786,543,109,324,546,789,203,475,937,801,276 years old.

I live in North America.

My adress is [Adress withheld].

And here's some really, REALLY personal info.

I hate getting hurt.

Oh yeah, and to end all confusion, I AM a boy. That's why I have BOY in my name!

I hope that I haven't given away too much about me, but I expect all you detectives out there can guess.

[One detective out there guesses right]

Oh, darn.

_ _ _ _ Did you eat my text cookie yet? I expect not, because, like I said, seldom people READ these things.

Seldom Person: Yes we do!

Er, I meant seldom as in FEW. FEW people read these things.

Few Person: Yes we do!

_ _ _ _ Okay, I write mostly Harry Potter fics. And, somehow, each and every one of them get lots of reviews. And almost none of them are flames. Yipee!

On a totally unrelated subject, who came up with the word "flame" anyway? Huh? Really, I tried looking in the Fanfiction.Net Dictionary for it, and it just told me the fire version of it. Nothing about "negative reviews."

Anyway, I write Potter fics because... really, book fics are the easiest to write. I mean, with TV, you have to translate actions into words, and words aren't great talkers, (yet somehow, ACTIONS are, even though you speak in words,) and comic books have you trying to translate PICTURES inot words, and everything else has you trying to translate something else into words. But what's easier than translatingwords into words?

And I write Harry Potter because, honestly, have you looked at the amount of stories there? Great place to make yourself heard.

_ _ _ _ Why do I get so many reviews?

Because I'm funnier than a wooden block.

Way funnier.

Word.

Oh yeah, and it probably also has to do with my obsessive updating rate, and the fact that I have the word "review" at least once in every chapter.

Review.

_ _ _ _ Have you eaten the cookie yet? Have you forgotten? Do you not care anymore? Are you bored of this yet? Or do you feel like breathing right now? If your answer is yes, no, or maybe to any of those questions, eat the cookie.

_ _ _ _ This section is for all of you who have to go to the bathroom right now.

GO TO THE BATHROOM, FOOL! Why are you wasting time reading this? Come on, you can make it. Unless you want to soil that chair you're sitting in. Oh wait- too late!

_ _ _ _ Hey, did you know that I have a nickel named Phillip?

Sadly, it's a girl nickel.

_ _ _ _ _ Oh my gosh, I can't believe it! You went through all of that, and you're STILL reading! Or maybe you just skipped to here...

6_0 (Don't ya' love that face?)

Well, in this section, I make parodies to songs. Why am I doing this in a bio? Because I live my life (my life, my life)

ON MY TERMS!

Ahem.

It's NOT the end of the world as we know it... (Oh yeah, that one was so witty!)

Chain chain chain... Chain chain Chain... chain chain chay,ay,ay,ay,ain... chain of fools... (The SIXTH chain had a capital "c"! that was mad cool!)

Billie Jean is not my lover

She's Just a girl who SAYS that, I am the one...

But, the kid is not my son...

(Instead of "claims," I have "says!" Keen!)

_ _ _ _ _
You've read to here? Congrats! But I've notived something.

WHY ARE THERE VERY LITTLE SUCCESFUL MALE WRITERS HERE,
AND JUST ABOUT EVERY SUCCESFUL WRITER IS FEMALE!?

I'm not being sexist or anything, I just notced. Yeah, I know that
there are PLENTY of succesful male writers (me, for example), but
the ratio of male to female is like, 1 to 15 or something.

By succesful, I mean having their stories enjoy lots of success,
which means a whole lot of reviews. Over 70 is where I draw the line
to success.

So? Does anyone have an answer? Review my story to tell me! As you can see,
I don't know what an ICQ number is, and, due to evil coincidences, I don't
have a screen name. Don't ask what they are. So you have to review to tell me!

Or not. _ _ _ _ _

You might not have guessed this yet, but (gasp!) I have no life.
Hahahahahahahahahahhahahahahaha!
If I'm not here, I'm at www.Gamefaqs.com.
My name over THERE is die70sdie.

Don't put the peas in the fire, man.

_ _ _ _ If you haven't noticed, my stories are different. VERY DIFFERENT. As a reviewer, Wettlewash, said, My stories are different.

Dude, if you want proof, go to my stories Harry's Adventure and Backslash. You won't be disappointed. _ _ _ _ _
Yeah, I'm running out of ideas to prolong this thing. But I must go on!
I must make you have to scroll down a half a second longer!

Oh, I've got it! THE ULTIMATE PROLONGING TOOL:

TO BE CONTINUED!!! _ _ _ _ _
If you've reached here, kudos to you. [Author Throws a Kudos bar to you]