TWoUI stands for The Well of Useless Information, as I have a rather uncanny ability to remember virtually anything I have seen, read, or heard; the "useless" part being that I will spout off random quotes and recollections in everyday conversation. I can't help it, a person will be speaking either to myself or someone else in the near vicinity, and it triggers a random fact lodged in my brain which I will promptly spout off to the speaker. You can imagine the looks I receive as I then have to explain my statement and how it fits with the conversation. Rather like Peter David shouting "Rutabega!" at random. You see? I even do it in my own musings! Frankly, I don't see how my husband puts up with it, but since he did give me the nickname, I assume he finds it endearing, or at least charming. I hope my daughters will not be too embarrassed by me when they are older.

I don't have much else to say about myself as I believe I am distinctly average, though I do have a slightly "witchy" looking nose due to its' being broken in elementary school. I am also several inches taller than the average woman, and graced with what I will generously term an "athletic" figure. One of my other informal monikers is "Twiggy." I have hooded eyes which make me appear sleepy or bored; which led to a number of verbal confrontations with instructors over the years. They are an intense green which I am fond of, but have a tendency to become bloodshot when I forget to remove my contact lenses after a long night in front of the computer. This does not help me appear more alert at my place of work, and prompts any number of people to inquire as to my well-being. *sigh*

Enough rambling, I hate people who talk about themselves to no end, as though they are the single greatest person on earth. I believe truly great people have no need to spout their own greatness, they become great when others recognize them for being remarkable people who should be heralded for their extreme character. No, I do not believe I am on a course to greatness, I am well aware I am doomed to a life of mediocraty through a number of less than prudent decisions and a lack of drive to better my situation. I am one of those detestable hypocrits who says "Something should be done!" yet here I sit on my arse and bemoan my "unfortunate" situation. I hate myself for it, yet I excuse my own behaviour with "Well, I don't know how to go about beginning to fix anything, so why try?" No, I'm not clinically depressed, just extremely self-loathing as a result of too much pondering over why we do the things we do, and why do we do them over and over again?

Now I shall climb off my soapbox and proceed to hopefully produce some sort of coherent literature which I pray at least one person will find to be a tolerable, if verbose, read.

Adieu, adieu, parting is such sweet sorrow.

TWoUI

First chapter of first story is up, and it's a Red vs Blue fic. Boy, did I go off on a tangent from my original concept; see below:

First story--or at least first chapter--will be posted within the next few weeks barring unforseen complications. I am waiting on a book I need in order to maintain continuity between Sherlock Holmes and my crossover character. This may be tenuous at best, but seeing how Watson's timeline seems to be flexible, I do not see any problem in adding a "missing file." Sir Arthur Conan Doyle did this himself with The Hound of the Baskervilles, which is how I first became introduced to the great Sherlock Holmes in the first place and is thus one of my favorite stories from the various collections. My only difficulty remaining is ensuring the timelines of both characters are not horribly disrupted or compromised. I realize because this is fanfiction I really do not need to be quite so exact, but I find it to be sloppy and irreverent to the original works if I simply write what I please with no regard for what is considered to be cannon. See you all in what I hope to be a mere two weeks.

Yeah, I typed that nearly three years ago. :P