kennycullen101
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Joined 04-02-09, id: 1887026, Profile Updated: 05-21-09
Author has written 2 stories for Twilight.

hi i am kenny totally in love with wrinkle bags

i love all twilight

and all twilight songs

lol lol lol

u know u love me

xxx

also i am not mad

there is this rubber thing

it tells the future

it said that i will have 500 kids with erik night

OMG

hey peps i am a fish face

Emmett Cullen: Stronger Than You since 1916

Jasper Hale: Charming Ladies since 1843

Alice Cullen: Quirkier than You since 1901

Rosalie Hale: Better Than You since 1916

Edward Cullen: Sexier Than You since 1901

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise versa copy this into your profile

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever forgotten how old you are when someone asked you, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, cpy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

Put this in your profile if you didn't know the Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star had the same tune. (okay, really, who the hell knew that?!)

If you went to sleep at around 2 am reading Twilight and/or New Moon and/or Eclipse, copy and pastes this onto your profile.

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever stopped to look at something in the middle of a busy street, copy this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you get good grades and still know nothing at all, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever felt the undeniable urge to slam your head into something, whether it is another person or not copy this into your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile.

Signs you live in 2009

1. You are on your computer everyday

2. You are more inside, than out.

4. You are on this site often.

5. As you read this, you keep nodding and smiling.

6. You were too busy, reading, nodding, and of course smiling, that you didn't notice there wasn't a number three.

7. You looked back to see if there was a number three.

8. You feel a bit stupid.

9. You think this is funny.

10. You want to copy this in your profile, right now - feel free.

If you have ever wanted to slap someone, but restrained yourself, congratulations, and copy and paste this to your profile.

If you have an odd sort of love/hate relationship with your computer, copy this to your profile.

If you have ever seen a movie or read a book so many times that you can quote it word for word, and do so at random moments, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you believe some teachers are seriously prejudiced, copy an paste this in your profile

If you have ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile.

If keyboards hate you, copy and paste this.

Come to the dark side . . . WE HAVE COOKIES!

Once upon a time

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty.

He said no.

She asked him if he would want to be with her forever.

And he said no.

She then asked him if she were to leave, would he cry?

Once again, he replied with a no.

She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face, the boy grabbed her arm and said...

"You're not pretty, you're beautiful.

I don't want to be with you forever, I need to be with you forever.

And I wouldn't cry if you left...I'd die..."

if you've ever walked into a wall before copy this into your profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you are a chocoholic copy this into your profile

If you ever fell off a chair backwards copy this into your profile.

If you have ever accidentally stabbed yourself or someone else with a pencil, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile

If you've ever had a mad laughing fit for no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile

If you're going to criticise someone, first walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticise them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

Last night, I was lying on my bed, staring up at the stars and wondering 'Where the heck is my roof?'

I want to do that thing when you put a map of the world on your wall and put pins in all the places you've been to. But first, I'll have to travel to the top two corners of the map so it doesn't fall down.

Ten percent of people in Britain believe that their food has a party when they shut the fridge door.

Why is rap so named? Becasue the'c' fell off at the printer.

Whose cruel idea was it for the words 'lisp' to have an 's' in it?

How is it possible to have a civil war?

Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in law, they come out to Woman Hitler?

Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures’?

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

Wal-Mart, do they, like, sell walls there?" - Paris Hilton.

Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before.

I’m not saying you’re stupid, I’m just implying it.

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door...

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

You know it's going to be a bad day when you fall out of bed and miss the floor.

It's always the last place you look...of course it is, why the heck would I keep looking after I found it?

When life gives you lemons, alter their DNA and make SUPER LEMONS!

I'm the kind of person that walks into a door and apologizes.

Constipated people don't give a crap.

Music is like candy - you throw away the rappers.

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.The
boys dont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

Find the guy that calls you beautiful instead of hot,

Who calls you back when you hang up on him,

Who'll lay under the stars for hours and listen to your heart beat.

Or will stay awake just to watch you sleep.

Wait for the guy that kisses your forhead,

Who keeps your picture in his wallet,

Who wants to show you off to the world even when your in sweatpants,

Who holds your hand in front of all his freinds,

Who thinks your beautiful without makeup,

The one who is constantly telling you of how much he cares and how is lucky to have you,

The one who turns to his friends and says THATS HER.

Paste this in your profile if you're one of the many teenagers that never smoked.

Too many people have smoked marijuana. If you haven't, write this to your profile.

If you hate those mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites, copy and paste this on your profile

If you have been hit in the face with a ball and started laughing copy this on your profile

If you like being utterly random copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever laughed so hard you either choked, hyperventalated, had your sides cramp, or all of the above copy and paste this on your profile

92 percent of the population has moved onto rap. If your one of the two percent who still rocks, copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever eaten something utterly disgusting on accident, and then realized it right afterward and tried to spit it out, copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever had an argument with yourself and LOST, copy and paste this on you profile.

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking copy and paste this on your profile

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the conversation copy this on your profile (You have NO idea)

If you think girls should rule the world and that it would be a better place copy this onto your profile

If you want to fire and/or sue those bloody weather men for giving you false hope so often (for snow days or something)...Copy and paste this to your profile, so we know who to call when we lead an angry mob :)

If you can listen to a song and match some of the lyrics up to your life copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you absolutely LOVE to sing even though you may or may not suck copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have more than 100 books in your room, copy this into your profile.

Annoying things to do on an elevator: read this!:) very funny!!

1) CRACK open your briefcase or handbag,
peer Inside and ask "Got enough air in
there?"

2) STAND silent and motionless in the
corner facing the wall without getting off.

3) WHEN arriving at your floor, grunt
and strain to yank the doors open, then
act as if you're embarrassed when they
open themselves.

4) GREET everyone with a warm handshake
and ask him or her to call you Admiral.

5) MEOW occasionally.

6) STARE At another passenger for a
while. Then announce in horror: "You're
one of THEM" - and back away slowly

7) SAY -DING at each floor.

8) SAY "I wonder what all these do?" And
push all the red buttons.

9) MAKE explosion noises when anyone
presses a button.

10) STARE, grinning at another passenger
for a while, then announce: "I have new
socks on."

11) WHEN the elevator is silent, look
around and ask: "Is that your beeper?"

12) TRY to make personal calls on the
emergency phone.

13) DRAW a little square on the floor
with chalk and announce to the other
passengers: "This is my personal space."

14) WHEN there's only one other person
in the elevator, tap them on the
shoulder, then pretend it wasn't you.

15) PUSH the buttons and pretend they
give you a shock. Smile, and go back for
more.

16) ASK if you can push the button for
other people but push the wrong ones.

17) HOLD the doors open and say you're
waiting for your friend. After a while,
let the doors close and say "Hi Greg,
How's your day been?"

18) DROP a pen and wail until someone
reaches to help pick it up, then scream:
"That's mine!"

19) BRING a camera and take pictures of
everyone in the lift.

20) PRETEND you're a flight attendant
and review emergency procedures and
exits with the Passengers.

21) SWAT at flies that don't exist.

22) CALL out "Group hug" then enforce it.

Pluto was declared no longer a planet on August 27, 2006, because it was "too small" and "off its orbit" for some scientists' likings. If you think Pluto should still be a planet, copy and paste this to your profile. LONG LIVE PLUTO!!.

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile

FAITH IN GOD

Ok, so this didn't happen to me, but still read it.

I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw a cashier hand this little boy some money back.

The boy couldn't have been more than 5 or 6 years old.

The cashier said, "I'm sorry, but you don't have enough money to buy this doll."

Then the little boy turned to the old woman next to him: ''Granny, are you sure I don't have enough money?''

The old lady replied: ''You know that you don't have enough money to buy this doll, my dear.''

Then she asked him to stay there for just 5 minutes while she went to look a round. She left quickly.

The little boy was still holding the doll in his hand.

Finally, I walked toward him and I asked him who he wished to give this doll to.

"It's the doll that my sister loved most and wanted so much for Christmas. She was sure that Santa Claus would bring it to her."

I replied to him that maybe Santa Claus would bring it to her afterall, and not to worry.

But he replied to me sadly. "No, Santa Claus can't bring it to her where she is now. I have to give the doll to my mommy so that she can give it to my sister when she goes there."

His eyes were so sad while saying this. "My sister has gone to be with God. Daddy says that Mommy is going to see God very soon too, so I thought that she could take the doll with her to give it to my sister.''

My heart nearly stopped.

The little boy looked up at me and said: "I told daddy to tell mommy not to go yet. I need her to wait until I come back from the mall."

Then he showed me a very nice photo of him where he was laughing. He then told me "I want mommy to take my picture with her so she won't

forget me. I love my mommy and I wish she doesn't have to leave me, but daddy says that she has to go to be with my little sister."

Then he looked again at the doll with sad eyes, very quietly.

I quickly reached for my wallet and said to the boy. "Suppose we check again, just in case you do have enough money for the doll?''

"OK," he said, "I hope I do have enough." I added some of my money to his without him seeing and we started to count it. There was enough for

the doll and even some spare money.

The little boy said: "Thank you God for giving me enough money!"

Then he looked at me and added, "I asked last night before I went to sleep for God to make sure I had enough money to buy this doll, so that

mommy could give it to my sister. He heard me!''

"I also wanted to have enough money to buy a white rose for my mommy, but I didn't dare to ask God for too much. But He gave me enough to buy the doll and a white rose.''

"My mommy loves white roses."

A few minutes later, the old lady returned and I left with my basket.

I finished my shopping in a totally different state from when I started. I couldn't get the little boy out of my mind.

Then I remembered a local newspaper article two days ago, which mentioned a drunk man in a truck, who hit a car occupied by a young woman and a little girl.

The little girl died right away, and the mother was left in a critical state. The family had to decide whether to pull the plug on the life-sustaining machine, because the young woman would not be able to recover from the coma. Was this the family of the little boy?

Two days after this encounter with the little boy, I read in the newspaper that the young woman had passed away.

I couldn't stop myself as I bought a bunch of white roses and I went to the funeral home where the body of the young woman was exposed for people to see and make last wishes before her burial.

She was there, in her coffin, holding a beautiful white rose in her hand with the photo of the little boy and the doll placed over her chest.

I left the place, teary-eyed, feeling that my life had been changed forever.. The love that the little boy had for his mother and his sister

is still, to this day, hard to imagine. And in a fraction of a second, a drunk driver had taken all this away from him.

Now you have 2 choices:

1) Repost this message.

2) Ignore it

(Please just copy and paste this on to your site and show that you care)

CHILD ABUSE

My name is Sarah,

I am but three.

My eyes are swollen

I cannot see.

I must be stupid,

I must be bad.

What else could have made

My daddy so mad?

I wish I were better,

I wish I weren't ugly.

Then maybe my mommy

Would still want to hug me.

I can't speak at all,

I can't do a wrong,

Or else I'm locked up

All the day long.

When I awake I'm all alone.

The house is dark,

My folks aren't home.

When my mommy does come

I'll try and be nice,

So maybe I'll get just

One whipping tonight.

Don't make a sound!

I just heard a car!

My daddy is back

From Charlie's Bar.

I hear him curse

My name he calls,

I press myself

Against the wall.

I try and hide

From his evil eyes,

I'm so afraid now

I'm starting to cry.

He finds me weeping,

He shouts ugly words.

He says its my fault

That he suffers at work.

He slaps me and hits me

And yells at me more.

I finally get free

And I run for the door.

He's already locked it,

And I start to bawl.

He takes me and throws me

Against the hard wall.

I fall to the floor

With my bones nearly broken,

And my daddy continues

With more bad words spoken.

"I'm sorry!", I scream,

But its now much too late.

His face has been twisted

Into unimaginable hate.

The hurt and the pain,

Again and again,

Oh please God, have mercy!

Oh please let it end!

And he finally stops

And heads for the door,

While I lay there motionless

Sprawled on the floor.

My name is Sarah

And I am but three,

Tonight my daddy,

Murdered me.

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Don't You Just Want To Kill Him by edwardcullenisagod77 reviews
This is a one shot story about how much bella hates jacob. She has a list of all the bad things that she wants to do to him. This is a story for anti-Jacob fans and are on TEAM EDWARD! Very OOC. WARNING DON'T READ IF YOU LIKE JACOB!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 709 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 9 - Follows: 3 - Updated: 5/22/2009 - Published: 4/24/2009 - Bella, Jacob - Complete
MC High by edwardcullenisagod77 reviews
The Cullens and their old friends are taking over campus. With mixed feelings and love in the air what relashionships will blossom? Is it love at first sight? What secrets lurk? Normal pairings, romance, rated T, who knows what could happen! ALL HUMAN.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 5 - Words: 4,598 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 6 - Updated: 5/12/2009 - Published: 4/2/2009 - Edward, Bella
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ketchup vamps reviews
you know you love the red stuff and vampires but this time its not blood it is ketchup with the occasional strawberry milkshake and also read this cas it is the best totally awusome
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 4 - Words: 1,032 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 5/22/2009 - Published: 4/30/2009 - Edward, Emily
annoying vamp reviews
this is so annoying you will love it
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Spiritual - Chapters: 2 - Words: 181 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 1 - Updated: 5/21/2009 - Published: 5/8/2009