chaosassasin24
 Author has written 3 stories for Naruto. One night, I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord. Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky. In each scene, I noticed footprints in the sand. Sometimes there were two sets of footprints, other times there was one set of footprints. This bothered me because I noticed that during the lower periods of my life, when I was suffering from anguish, sorrow, or defeat, i could only see one set of footprints. So I said to the Lord. " You promised me, Lord, that if I followed you, you would walk with me always. But I noticed that during the most trying periods of my life, there have only been one set of footprints in the sand. Why, when i have needed you most, have you not been there for me?" The Lord replied, "The times when you have seen only one set of footprints, are those when I have carried you." age:nun ya buisness name:see age my naruto oc: name: nagashi zetsumei age:19 birth village:kumo h/color:white e/color:icey blue s/color:light brown outfit:black tanktop, white short sleeved button up shirt open,black shinobi pants, no shoes,bandages around wrists and ankles black shades on head (hiate is wraped around arm) personality:calm,cocky,brave next of kin:unknown weapons:shingai - long sleek odachi with a circular black guard white cloth wrapped around a bronze handle. ninjutsu lvl:mid anbu ninjutsu: fuuton:fuzei taihou(wind style:air cannon): sends air saturated wind chakra at enemy cappable of piercing even the kusanagi-A-rank ryuuton:karyuu no minami(dragon style: fire dragon of the south): grants user the power and presence of the fire dragon Hinote-B-rank ryuuton:suryuu no azuma(dragon style: water dragon of the east):grants user the power and presence of the water dragon Taiga-B-rank ryuuton:doryuu no nishi(dragon style:earth dragon of the west):grants user the power and presence of the earth dragon Kohaku-B-rank ryuuton:furyuu no hoku(dragon style:wind dragon of the north):grants user the power and presence of the wind dragon Amatsu-kaze-B-rank ryuuton:saryuu no kenkon(dragon style: final dragon of the universe):grants user the power and presence of the ultimate dragon Nuru-S-rank kage bushin no jutsu(shadow clone technique)-s-rank Kuchiyose no jutsu(okami/ryuu)(summoning jutsu(wolves/dragons)-a-rank ude no tenshi(arm of angels):cloaks arm in highly condensed amounts of chakra causeing major damage to both user and foe-s-rank hijutsu kenjutsu lvl:kage kenjutsu style:amatsu ryu(hevenly style) genjutsu lvl: chunin genjutsu: chishio issei(blood cry) -agffects the sense of sight causes foe to envision blood flowing from them-c-rank shougeki issei(crash cry)-affects the sense of hearing causes short term deafness-b-rank fukyuu ankoku(forever darkness)-affects all senses cuts the victim off from all of his/her senses-s-rank bloodlines: hyo-shunkun(ice master)-allows user a more indepth control of ice more powerful than hyoton amatsugan(heavenly eye)-has the abilities of the rinnegan,sharingan,and byakugan only it pushes their power to limits said blood lines will never acheive appearance-eyes turn deep purple as pupil dissapears and 1-to-3 crimson diamonds apear and circle the border of the iris untill forth state where a yellow ring is encircleling the edge of the iris and the spot where the pupil should be. 1.gains one diamond, the user can see in an entire 360 degree fashion alllows user not only to see the tenketsus and chakra ,but allows user to track any one if they have read their chakra's flow any where on earth unless said person dies. 2.gains another diamond, the user is enabled with both the coping techniques of the sharingan as well as full use of amaterasu,tsukiyomi,susanoo,and a fourth move that is up to the users afinity and personalitty with out the user suffering from the blindness of the mangeyeko. 3.gains third diamond, the user is given the power of shinra tensei,bansho tensei,chibaku tensei,and the rinnegans most secret technique,Gedō: Rinne Tensei no Jutsu 4.the diamonds turn into a bright yellow circle,this form is close to that of a third tome sharingan,this form can do somthing that no other jutsu can do with out death it can call forth the shinnigami and kami for about 50 seconds to help in battle. (((((((((((((((((((remember most of these jutsu are over b-rank,please dont't steal any of these jutsus i worked hard on them)))))))))))))))))) my bleach oc: name:akuma tenshi age:18 aperance:short white spiked hair,open black arrancar jacket( showing of his eight pack,and hollow hole over his heart),his hollow mask looks like a shark fang necklace and hangs fom his neck,dark green jeans with holes in knees,black gloves with white fingers,blood red eyes black sclera in left eye( which has a golden iris and blood red pupil) scar over left eye, tanned skin speicies:arrancar rank: former cero(left on own acord) abilities: 1.grande cero 2.sonido master 3.hierro 4.martial art master 5.precognitive visions 6.regeneration rencanacion:zorro rencarnacion appearence: his hair grows down to his butt,he is incased in a silver bone armor(think grimmjows body except for arms and shoulder),spiked black shoulderpads on both shoulder, black spiked finger less gauntlets on both hands showing his sharp claws, 9 black,silver tipped fox tails, two snow white angel wings comming from his back, his hollow mask rises and shapes two fox ears on the sides of his head, his canine teeth grow into fangs,his hollow hole based in the Center of his chest his kaatana transforms into a large zanbatou(think tetsaiga,only a with a blood red blade,and black fur between the blade and hilt) MY DMC OC: name: cole appearance: spikey white hair,grey eyes,black t-shirt w/ punisher skull on it, black combat jeans, black boots,black fingerless gloves, blacktrench coat,a strange pendant hanging from his neck, a sword holster on back,tWo desert eagle holsters on belt loop devil arms: 1.ultima-a long broad sword,the blade is pure black ,a dragon skull for a guard, and a long femur for a handle. 2. torros-a pair of dark blue-green gauntlets (gauntlets have u shaped blades at base of wrists)and greives a thin brestplate connected to two shoulder pads on both shoulder. 3.harusame-a long sleek kaatana,with a circular guard,and red cloth rapped around the handle 4.force edge(sparda) GUNS: 1.BLACK WOLF&BLUE PHEONIX: TWO DESERT EAGLES,BLACK WOLF IS BLACK WITH RED MOONS AND WIND PATTERNS, BLUE PHEONIX IS BARK BLUE WITH WHITE FLAME PATERNS. 2.SHOTGUN:a regular shotgun 3.SPIRAL 4.ARTEMIS abilities: super regeneration.super human strebgth, stamina,and speed.devil trigger, and weapon abilities ULTIMA: 1.stinger 2.air rave 3.drive 4.helmbreacker 5.rising wolf-launches foe into air TORROS: 1. kick 13 2.slammer-rushes foe at supersonic speed and slams into foe who then gets ripped apart by the blades on wrists. 3.rising valor- launches foe in air with a torrent of kicks 4. slamdown-slams down fist into opponent (great combo with rising valor) HARUSAME: 1.summon swords 2.blood wave- sends a concentrated wave blood red energy at foe 3.slash vortex 4. jugdgement cut SPARDA: 1.stinger 2.streak 3.helmbreacker 4.rising wolf devil trigger mode: black armor forms on torso and lower body, arms become armor plated w/ silver gauntlets that have a full-moon decal on back of hand,black shoulder pads form,a blood red cape ,his hair grows longer and turns blood red,his face turns dark purple,dark green lines comming down from his deep gold eyes. my inuyasha oc: name:matsuro age:150(apears 17) apearance: black sleeveless hakuma shirt,black hakuma pants,long spiky red hair,golden irises white pupil,a shark fang necklace, beare foot,small claws on fingers and toes,black wolf ears on top of head, sword strapped to back,long wolf tail sways benind him. speices:half-wolf demon wepons&abilities: yuusha(hero)- his sword made by totosai from the fang of the high wolf koga,is virtually indestuctable,can slice anything, has 2 special attacks: tsukikiba-sends a fang shape wave of energy at opponent(can kill over 999,999 demons in one strike) soratate-protects him from any attack( other than the backlashwave or wind scar) kariteken(reaper fist)-collects a large amount of yokai in his fist and slams it into the foe. shinigami no yaiba(blades of soul reapers) a deadly long range attack that expels the stored yokai from claws(unlike kariteken where the energy is slamed into foe). my shaman king oc: name:sarumaro age:14 ghost:spirit of the wild-(a black version of the origanal spirit of fire)kami class apearance: white flat hair,tan skin,blood red eyes hidden behind black sunglasses,black sleeveless shirt,black jeans,dark green nikes,white belt, long odachi straped to belt loop. weapons&abilities: over soul, unity sword:kageshukun oversoul: wild over soul- ghost:spirit of the wild type:weapon class:kami medium:kageshukun apearance:black aura surounds the blade,blood red lions head over hilt and guard,long lions tail comes from where hilt should end atacks:wild fire blade- unleashes a black blaze from sword's blade. cheetah's strike- an extremly fast slash atack kutotatsu- ghost:spirit of the wild type:armor class:kami medium:kageshukun apearance:silver dragon's head forms over right forearm, guard, and hilt,glowing yellow broadsword from open dragons mouth ,silver scale brestplate forms, black wings sprout from back, dragons skull forms over head mouth open. attacks:burning man- envelops user in furyoku and charges at foe. ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((that ends my oc's)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) hobbies: drawing ,playing base ball, soccer ,and singing favorite anime/manga:Naruto, Bleach, One Peice, Rosario Vampire, Full Metal Alchemist, Inuyasha,death note,shaman king, code geass lor,and devil may cry etc. favorite naruto pairings: narutoxanko: it makes sense cause of both are hated for things they have no control over. narutoxhinata: done to death but still they go together narutoxino: blonds have more fun plus they both have the same 'tude narutoxtemari:both blonde,both wind users ,and as gaara's sister she has a somewhat good view of a jinkurikichi's life narutoxyugito: both jinkurkichis so they know the pain of loneliness narutoxsamui:she fine narutoxtenten: see narutoxsamui favorite bleach pairings: ichigoxorinime: their just so cute together ichigoxrukia:they both have pretty abrasive attitudes i think they'd be good together uryuxyoroichi:the very attitude clash would be hilarius ichirukihimetatsuki:the ultimate 4-some!!(ichigo,rukia,orihime,and tatsuki) favorite cross over pairs: naruxyoroichi naruxrukia naruxrangiku naruxjean grey naruxunnohana naruxtokiko naruxmahiro naruxkagome naruxkikiyo naruxsango naruxolder karin(bleach) naruxwinry naruxlt.hawkeye naruxlust naruxsloth ichixanna ichixpan ichixlady(dmc) ichixtrish ichixfem kyuubi. least favorite paring:YAOI!! it is pure evil,some yuri it's just knida weird. narutoxsakura: i mean come on!! she spent half the show hitting and insulting him!! who would find this realistic?! irukaxanko:sorry, iruka not on my watch! sasukexANYONE NOT FROM OTO:ehh (((((((((((((((when i see a quote that fits me it's here)))))))))))))))))))) If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile. If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vise-versa copy this into your profile. 98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile. Month one Mommy Month Two Mommy Month Three You know what Mommy Month Four Mommy Month Five You went to the doctor today. Month Six I can hear that doctor again. Month Seven Mommy Every Abortion Is Just . . . One more heart that was stopped. If you're against abortion, re-post this If you believe in Jesus Christ put this in your profile and don't just ignore this, because in the Bible it says if you deny me, I will deny you in front of my Father in the gates of Heaven. If you think that those stupid kids should just give that God-forsaken Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile. If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile. If you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy, copy this into your profile. If you've ever lost someone you loved, copy and paste this onto your profile. If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile. If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile If you want to fire and/or sue those bloody weather men for giving you false hope so often (for snow days or something)...Copy and paste this to your profile, so we know who to call when we lead an angry mob :) If you've ever been so obsessed with a TV or Movie character that you scare everyone who knows you, join the club, and copy and paste this to your profile. If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile (Kingdom Hearts... Final Fantasy... Anime... Manga...) Sicence prvoes taht eevn wehn the wrods are srcabmled up you can sitl raed tihs. Cpoy and Psate tihs itno yuor porflie if you can raed tihs. If you've walked under something that was about two feet above your head and ducked anyway copy and paste this is your profile. If you've ever been obsessed with something even if it gave you horrifying nightmares, copy and paste this to your profile. IF YOU IGNORE THIS WITHOUT READING IT YOU HAVE NO HEART...BUT IF YOU FIND YOU CANNOT STOP UNTIL YOU REACH THE END THEN YOU MUST HAVE A VERY BIG HEART. (I read to the end I have a BIIIIIG HEART!!) Mommy...Johnny brought a gun to school Now you have two choices i read this thing up above and DAMMIT I WANTED TO CRY!! but it's hard for me to cry, whether i want to or not...DAMMIT! Sniff ()() Copy the bunny onto your profile to help him achieve world domination. Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know which to call someone. Weird is the same as different, which is the same as unique, than weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it, copy this onto your profile! Even when you can’t see him GOD is there! If you believe in GOD put this in your profile If you don't watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile. If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile. If you talk to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile. If your profile is longer than the chapters of most of your stories copy and paste this to yor profile. If you think that Sasuke from Naruto completly has to have the nick-name 'Chicken Butt Hair Dude', copy this to your profile while laughing your ass off. 30 of kids go to college. the other 70 either drop out or don't have the proper skills to. If you are on of the 30 that KNOW that your going to college put this on your profile and add your name to the list. EcoliandDahChihuahua, Gaara's-pandachan101, Evilfangirl, Feareth the Kitty,Monko25, leafninja345435, FrozenFyre , AkastukiFan, H-bomber,chaosassasin24 I think people should read this if they HATE child abusing. If you HATE child abusing like me copy and paste this to your profile. My name is sarah I am but three, My eyes are swollen I cannot see, I must be stupid I must be bad, What else could have made My daddy so mad? I wish I were better I wish I weren't ugly, Then maybe my mommy Would still want to hug me. I can't speak at all I can't do a wrong Or else I'm locked up All the day long When I awake I'm all alone The house is dark My folks aren't home. When my mommy does come I'll try and be nice, So maybe I'll get just One whipping tonight Don't make a sound! I just heard a car My daddy is back From Charlie's Bar. I hear him curse My name he calls I press myself Against the wall. I try and hide From his evil eyes I'm so afraid now I'm sradishing to cry. He finds me weeping He shouts ugly words, He says its my fault That he suffers at work. He slaps me and hits me And yells at me more, I finally get free And I run for the door. He's already locked it And I sradish to bawl, He takes me and throws me Against the hard wall. I fall to the floor With my bones nearly broken, And my daddy continues With more bad words spoken. "I'm sorry!", I scream But its now much too late His face has been twisted Into unimaginable hate. The hurt and the pain Again and again Oh please God, have mercy! Oh please let it end! And he finally stops And heads for the door, While I lay there motionless Sprawled on the floor. My name is Sarah And I am but three, Tonight my daddy, Murdered me. child abuse, MAKE IT STOP If you have insanely annoying siblings copy and paste this on your profile If you like being utterly random copy and paste this on your profile ( Sometimes i do some times i don't...) if you love Naruto so much you wish the characters were real so you coud be one of them, copy and paste this on your profile If you have ever had an arguent with yourself and LOST, copy and paste this on you profile. If you have ever slapped yourself and/or banged your head against a desk for no reason copy this on your profile If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the conversation copy this on your profile If you hate those mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites, copy and paste this on your profile If you want to smack the living daylights out of Sasuke for leaving Sakura copy an paste this on your profile! If you have ever tried to make plans for world domination put this on your profile If you have ever copy and pasted something copy and paste this onto your profile If you have ever dreamed about being an Anime Character, copy and paste this into your profile If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear beating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc. then copy this into your profile! If you avoid teen fads and don't live your life according to others copy and paste this Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen, watching-waiting-wishing, 100-percent-Harry-Potter-obsessed, iluvdavidwright45, dianeandnumairareahotcouple,windsoftiti, Ilovethelittletacos...Ilovethemgood, i-have-issues-deal-with-it, Kiba Obsessed Demonic Angel, Digital98, Anime-Kunoichi,Chinbaldo,Naruto Ninja44,May and Dawn are the best, rst64tlc,NeonZangetsu,chaosassasin24 If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random, or anything similar, post this in your profile. If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile FuNnIe QuOtEs If the opposite of 'pro' is 'con', then what's the opposite of 'progress'? We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police I'm not littering...I'm donating to the Earth. Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible? Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now. When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it. I am not a humanitarian. I am a hell-raiser. Heck is the place for people who don't believe in Gosh. I'm not a complete idiot... Some parts are missing. The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not. They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every-time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room? Sarcasm is one more service I offer. Compassion costs extra. Insanity is a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world. Don't take life too seriously; no one gets out alive. I will temporarily rule the world, forever. Life is like robbing a bank; so worth the while! You want to know who your real friends are? Screw up and see who's still there- (A good one!!) Let's see. My first impression: I hate you - Kakashi (Naruto) Don't tell me the sky's the limit, when there's footprints on the moon- Don't look at me with that tone of voice!- Silence is golden, duck-tape is sliver- Too troublesome - Shikamaru (Naruto) It's a wonder they haven't locked you up yet- A good friend would come and bail you out of jail. A true friend would be sitting there beside you saying, "Man that was fun! Let's do it again!" Question: if some one with multiple personalities threatens to commit to kill himself is it considered a hostage situation?? Who ever said that anything was possible has obviously never tried to ski through a revolving door... He shouldn't let his mind wander, it's too little to go out on its own He had a good idea once, but it died of loneliness "Comfort the Disturbed and Disturb the Comfortable" -Unknown -"Fiction is a lie and good fiction is the truth inside the lie" -Unknown Genius by Birth Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them. You've gotta die in creative ways. They keep saying the right person will come along; I think mine got hit by a If it's not nailed down, it's fair game. To err is human, to forgive is not Company Policy When in doubt, use brute force. When that doesn't work...RUN LIKE HELL! Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense. If at first you don't succeed, redefine success. If you are feeling good, don't worry. You'll get over it. Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid all together. Death is God's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy. I haven't lost my mind -- it's backed up on tape somewhere. You can't fall off the floor, but you can always pick yourself back up. Anything can be made to work if you fiddle with it long enough. If you mess with anything long enough, it'll break. Push something hard enough and it will fall. You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. (I Live by There's no point in being grownup if you can't be childish sometimes! I talk to myself because I like dealing with a better class of people. Had this been an actual emergency, we would have fled in terror and you Tomorrow will be canceled due to lack of interest. Schizophrenia beats being alone. Why is it that when adults have multiple personalities it's schizophrenia, Do what comes naturally now. Seethe and fume and throw a tantrum Sleep: A completely inadequate substitute for caffeine The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the first If at first you don't succeed, destroy all the evidence that you tried. Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view If you have ever gotten a lock (like one on a locker) and put it on something, then forgot the combination, copy and paste this into your profile. 98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile. 92 percent of American teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch/American Eagle told them it was uncool to breathe. If you are one of the 8 percent who would stand there and laugh, copy this into your profile 93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile 92 of teens have moved on to rap music. if you're part of the 8 that still rock out every day, copy this to your profile. 95 percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you're a nerd and proud of it, copy this into your profile. If you or your best friend is insane, copy this to your profile. If you've ever fallen asleep in class, copy this to your profile. If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile. If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile. If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this on your profile If you hate those irritating mosquitoes giving you mosquito bites copy and past this into your profile. If you like chocolate as much as I do copy this in your profile. If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile. There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile. I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do... If u think rock paper scissors solves everything then put this in ur profile! If you absolutely REFUSE to grow up copy this into your profile If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile. If people think you are mentally insane...copy and paste this onto your profile. If you think that I'm making you think too much then copy this onto your profile. wowlookatthisimtypingthisveryoddlinebreakifyoucanreaditcopyandpasteyousmartperson If Orochimaru creeps the shit out of you, copy and paste this onto your profile and add your name: Lily, Danni Lea, Arashi Kitsune-sama, Fresh Prince of Konoha,chaosassasin24 Come join the dark side. (We have cookies) Add your name to the list if you have joined the dark side purely for cookies: psychotic me, Flaming Thunder, Arashi Kitsune-sama, Fresh Prince of Konoha,chaosassasin24 I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh? Yaeh and I awlyas toghuht slpeling was ipmorantt! tahts so cool! If you can read that please put it in your profile. Read this outloud. This is this cat This is is cat This is how cat This is to cat This is keep cat This is a cat This is dumbass cat This is busy cat This is for cat This is forty cat This is seconds cat Now go back up and read the third word in each sentence. If you didn't catch it the first time through, copy and paste it. And you know that you didn't. 25 REASONS I OWE MY MOTHER 1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE. 2. My mother taught me RELIGION. 3 . My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL. 4. My mother taught me LOGIC. 5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC. 6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT. 7. My mother taught me IRONY. 8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS. 9. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM. 10. My mother taught me about STAMINA. 11. My mother taught me about WEATHER. 12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY. 13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE. 14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION. 15. My mother taught me about ENVY. 16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION . 17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING. 18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE. 19. My mother taught me ESP. 20. My mother taught me HUMOR. 21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT. 22. My mother taught me GENETICS. 23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS. 24. My mother taught me WISDOM. 25. And my favorite: My mother taught me about JUSTICE.
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If you believe that Naruto and Hinata are meant to be together and think that it will happen, copy and paste in your profile If you hate NejiHina then copy & paste this into your profile THE WE HATE SASUKE CLUB: If you hate Sasuke from NARUTO, copy and paste thisinto your profile THE WE LOVE SASUKE-BASHING CLUB: If you hate Sasuke from NARUTO and love making him suffer, copy and paste this into your profile If you want to smack the living daylights out of Sasuke for abandoning Sakura, copy and paste this to your profile. If you want to learn Japanese, copy/paste this into your profile.(I'M LEARNING IT!!) If you think the Coca-coca Puff Turky-Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this into your profile. If you think that those stupid kids should just give that God-forsaken Trix rabbit some Trix, copy this into your profile. If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile. There is nothing wrong with arguing with yourself, it's when you argue with your self and LOSE that you should be worried. if you have ever done that put this on your profile. If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile. If you threaten inanimate objects put this on your profile If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile. If you ever walked into the wrong classroom, copy and paste this into your profile. I'm bored...If you're bored then paste this in your profile and let the world know you have nothing to do... If you don't believe life is fair shit...copy and paste this into your profile. If you've ever copied and pasted something into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile. If you should be doing homework right now, copy this into your profile. (A/N: Tip: Say you don't have any, and then do it at three in the morning. If you're not a freshman in high school or older, you didn't get it from me) If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile. If you KNOW the voices in your head are real, copy and paste this to your profile! If you are crazy and/or insane and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this to your profile. Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "where to begin?" If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are addicted to vampires and would like to become one, post this onto your profile.(Yes, this has to do with Twilight.) Even when you can’t see Him, GOD is there! If you believe in GOD put this in your profile. If you have ever been watching a T.V show, and when the commercials came on you forgot what you were watching copy this into your profile. If you adore chocolate and frequently suffer from chocolate cravings while you have no access to the heavenly substance, copy this into your profile. IF YOU HAVE SPELLED YOUR NAME WRONG PASTE THIS IN YOUR PROFILE IF YOU HAVE BEEN ON YOUTUBE FOR MORE THAN 5 HOURS PASTE THIS IN YOUR PROFILE If you like filling your profile with 'copy this into your profile' thingys, then COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE!( I LOVE doing this!) If you have ever missed your mouth when trying to take a sip of water, copy and paste this into your profile. If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile. Drugs are bad news. Copy this into your profile. Too many people are on crack. If you're not, copy this into your profile. Too many people smoke marijuana. If you don't, copy this into your profile. 30 percent of kids go to college. The other 70 either drop-out or don't have the proper skills to. If you're on of the 30 percent that you know you're going to go to college, copy and paste this into your profile. If you think being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this into your profile. If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile. If you're hyper, like being hyper, and are hyper all the time, COPY THIS INTO YOUR PROFILE! DO IT! If you hate those irritating mosquitos giving you mosquito bites copy this in your profile Copy this into your profile if you're a procrastination addict. If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile. If you have ever said something that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile!. If you have ever been hit in the face with a ball and started laughing maniacally, copy and paste this into your profile If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile If you spend at least 3 hours a day looking at fanfictions...writing fanfictions...or looking at others profiles than copy and paste this on your profile! FANFICTION: MY ANTI-DRUG. because, who has time for drugs if you're reading and plotting and writing and checking reviews? If this is true for you, copy and paste this to your profile. -- Damn straight. If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile! If you think Sasuke's a manwhore who ditched his village for his own selfish purposes and he deserves to burn for all the screwups he's made, copy this into your siggy! If you think Sasuke from Naruto should have the nickname 'Chicken Butt Hair Dude', copy this into your profile while laughing your head off. If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy and paste this into your profile.(Sasuke and Karin count) If you can think of at least one person you would like to push down a well (Karin counts), copy this into your profile.(Sasuke also) If you actually read through this entire thing, and sorted out the ones that fit you, copy/paste this on your profile. If you took the time to read all of these (and you usually do), copy and paste this onto your profile. Toungue Twisters: Tokyo tokkyo kyoka kyoku Sumomo mo momo mo momo no uchi, momo mo sumomo mo momo no uchi Basu gasu bakuhatsu Namamugi namagome namatamago Akamakigami, aomakigami, kimakigami Kaeru pyoko-pyoko mi pyoko-pyoko, awasete pyoko-pyoko, mu pyoko-pyoko If you messed up on these (and you know you did) copy them into your bio while laughing your ass off ()() Copy the bunny totem onto your profile to help it achieve world domination. Come join the dark side. (We have cookies) Seventeen things to do at WalMart 1. Get boxes of extra-small condoms and put them into people's carts when they aren't looking. 2. Set all the alarms in House wares to go off at five-minute intervals. 3. Make a trail of tomato juice leading to the rest rooms (preferably BEFORE the pissed janitor attempts to clean it up). 4. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a packet of M&M's on lay-by. 5. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "'Code 3' in House wares"... and see what happens. 6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding section. 8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?!" 9. Look right into the security camera and use as it as a mirror and pick your nose. 10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. 11. Dart around the store suspiciously humming the 'Mission Impossible' tune. 12. In the Auto-Department, practice your 'Madonna' look with different sized funnels. 14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the 'foetal position' and scream,” NO! NO! It's those VOICES again!" 16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down the aisle, shouting, "Go, Pikachu, GO!" 17.Go to the applyance section, plug in a coffe machine, pour pop in the back of it, and turn it on. For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.) REST IN PIECE TOONAMI. From beginning to the very end I was there. I will never forget. Tom and the Absolution A great Character and a funny host You will live on forever in this. If you were there for Toonami from the beginning to end and now wish to honor it post this on your profile. Zaara the black, jmasta32,chaosassasin24 FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Never ask for food. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr/Mrs. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Bail you out of jail and tell you what you did was wrong. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Never seen you cry. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Know a few things about you. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will knock on your front door. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Are for awhile. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you’ve had enough. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Say they are too busy to listen to your problems, but when it comes to them they expect you to have all the time in the world. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours. FAKE ASS FRIENDS: Will ignore this TRUE STORY A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away. As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely. The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won't repost it? Repost this if you truly believe in God. PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what, and if you stand up for him he will stand up for you. "Love can defeat any addiction. Hell, it is one." -Tyler Perry as Madea, Diary of a Mad Black Woman (Movie) "Don't fight people who bring you down. The best thing to do to them is to prove them wrong." -Tyler Perry as Madea, Diary of a Mad Black Woman (Movie) "Destiny, John, is a fickle bitch." -Benjamin Linus, Lost "If we can't live together, we're going to die alone." -Jack Shepherd, Lost "Don't tell me what I can't do." -John Locke, Lost "Never doubt that a small group of committed people can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has." -Margaret Mead "Heroes get remembered, but Legends never die. Follow your heart, and you can never go wrong." -Some baseball player, Sandlot "The truth is rarely pure and never simple." -Oscar Wilde "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." -Albert Einstein "When arguing with a fool, make sure that the opponent isn't doing the exact same thing." -Abraham Lincoln "Wise men talk because they have something to say; Fools talk because they have to say something." -Plato "Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable it is, must be the truth." -Sherlock Holmes "If you can't convince them, confuse them." -Harry S. Truman "A word to the wise ain't necessary; it's the stupid ones that need the advice." -Bill Cosby "Life is the greatest teacher, unfortunately it kills all its students." -Unknown "Dont' take life seriously, no one ever gets out alive." -Unknown "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." -Albert Einstein "The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese." -Unknown "Never look down on somebody unless you're helping them up." -Jesse Jackson "You can kill the dreamer, but you can't kill the dream." -Martin Luther King Jr. "It is not enough to have a good mind; the main thing is to use it well." -Rene Descartes "They don't grade fathers, but if your daughter's a stripper, you fucked up." -Chris Rock "Titties and tater tots don't mix." -Chris Rock A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle If you think Family Guy is the funniest show on television, copy and paste it on your profile. If you think Masashi Kishimoto is ruining Naruto and agree, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. The Fifth Rider of Armageddon, Hiroshima Namikaze, Zaara the black, desuta, Reikson, D-reaper X-20, blackstardragon624, chinoodin, The Silver Blossom, RasenganFin, Raidentensho, Knives91, Kingkakashi, DarkSamuraiX1999, THE HEE-HO KING, Wirespeed91, Naruto 21, GraityTheWizard, GuyverZero, durwin, Hakkyou no Yami, VFSNAKE, Nine Tailed Naruto,chaosassasin24 Naruto for Rokudaime Hokage! If you also want Naruto to succeed Tsunade as the next Hokage, then copy and paste this to your profile page, and add your name to the list! Help Naruto achieve his dream!: KinKitsune01, adngo714, Temari Sabaku Nara, Unices, DemonTwins-Ichigo-Makuri, GrimmKitty94, The Fifth Rider of Armageddon, thymistacles,chaosassasin24 .••) .•) .•.•) .•) In case you need further proof that the human race is On a Myer hairdryer: On a bag of On a bar of Palmolive soap: On some frozen dinners: On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: On packaging for a K-Mart iron: On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: On Nytol Sleep Aid: On most brands of Christmas lights: On a Japanese food processor: On packet of Nobbys' On an American Airlines packet of nuts: I don't blame the company; I blame the parents for On a Swedish chainsaw: I'm Sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry But most of all I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm Sorry I'm sorry Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?" If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry' Quiz: Your instincts has its advantages all the time... This is freaky as anything...DO NOT CHEAT (You'll kick yourself later.) I was a little skeptical trying this, but if you follow the instructions you'll be surprised! We'll see tomorrow if the wish comes true. Some of the things are freakily true, but if you sit down and think about it, most of the answers are right because the way the questions are set up. The human mind of everyone, really, it works in similar ways. Take 3 minutes and try this...it will freak you out...BUT NO CHEATING! This game has a funny/spooky outcome. Don't read ahead...just do it in order! It's worth a try. First..get a pen and paper. When you actually choose names, make sure it's people you actually know and go with your first instinct. Scroll down one line at a time...and don't read ahead or you'll ruin it! 1. First, write the numbers 1 through 11 in a column. 2. Then, beside numbers 1 and 2, write down any two numbers you want. 3. Beside the 3 and 7, write down the names of members of the opposite sex. 4. Write anyone's name (like friends or family...) in the 4th, 5th, and 6th spots. 5. Write down four song titles in 8,9,10, and 11. (Go with your instincts!) 6. Finally, make a wish. And now the key for the game... Look at your progress 1. You must tell (the number in space 2) people about this game. 2. The person in space 3 is the one that you love. 3. The person in 7 is one you like but can't work out. 4. You care most about the person you put in 4. 5. The person you name in number 5 is the one who knows you very well. 6. The person you name in 6 is your lucky star. 7. The song in 8 is the song that matches with the person in number 3. 8. The title in 9 is the song for the person in 7. 9. The tenth space is the song that tells you most about YOUR mind. 10. 11 is the song telling you how you feel about life NOW...post this bulletin (don't reply) within the hour. IF you do, your wish will come true... If you don't it will become the opposite. I took this thing and it is creepily accurate. My results: 1-4 2-7 3-not sayin 4-louis 5-josh 6-anita 7-irena 8-y'all wanna single 9-i gotta feeling 10-hotel room service 11-so hard '93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, blissfulmememories, Vampire Apple, Vampireyaoi, Queen-Skizophrenya, Metropolis Kid (I'm not a teenager any longer, but I still endorse this.), Blacksand1, Twinkers4, Shinigamiking-Youko,chaosassasin24 Famous Quotes "I'll kick your ass, eat your food, and kick you ass again." - The Fifth Rider of Armageddon "We live for his sake and we die for his sake, if this is to be my fate, it is pointless to resist it. We travel the road we cannot see, and what lies at the end of the road is the end of life. And all of this is the guidance of God." - Unknown "To be a sheep in a world of sheep is one thing; to be a sheep in a world of predators is something else, an if someone hides behind a label of a sheep do to cowardice while another has to take his place, holding the predators at bay is truly a coward." - George Olsen "War is the extension of politics." - Karl von Clausewitz "When I think about what's worse for society, cigarettes or porn, I think to myself, 'Damn I need a drink.'" - Eikichi Onizuka "I will never be a memory." - Sephiroth "Hate to live, don't live to hate." Sergent Hatred "THIS IS SPARTA!" - Leonidas "Stand strong through the storms of life, the sun will always shine on you." - RJ Richie "Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country." - John F. Kennedy "Float like a butterfly sting like a bee!" - Muhammad Ali "Mr. Gorbachev tear down this wall!" - Ronald Reagan "Never look down on anybody unless you're helping him up." - Jesse Jackson "I pity the fool." - Mr. T "Courage is being scared to death but saddling up anyway." - John Wayne "You can kill the dreamer but you can't kill the dream." - Martin Luther King Jr. "If you ain't laughing you ain't living." - Carlos Manceia "If you don't go into the tiger's den you can't get the cub" - a famous Japanese saying "Up yours!" - Unknown "Do or do not, there is no 'try'." - Yoda "Bite my shiny metal ass!" - Bender "I believe there's a place where the restless souls wander. Burdened by the weight of their own sadness, they wait for a chance to set the wrong things right. Only then can they be reunited with the ones they love. Sometimes, a crow shows them the way. Because sometimes, love is stronger than death." - Sarah from The Crow: City of Angels "I learned at a very young age that I cannot trust in or count on anyone but myself. To do so invites deceit and despair and opens a vulnerability that can be exploited. To do so is a weakness." - Artemis Entreri "With each kill I grow wiser, and with added wisdom I grow stronger." - Artemis Entreri "It is an unfortunate fact that we can secure peace only by preparing for war." - John F. Kennedy "Let the anger of the righteous flow and become the hammer against the wicked. Let the sword of justice run cold with the tears of the faithful." - Unknown "Even though I walk through the valley of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me." - Psalm 23:4 "War is in your blood, when you're pushed killing is as easy as breathing. Live for nothing or die for something." - Rambo "In this world the food for he strong is the flesh of the weak. The strong live and the weak die." - Shishio Makoto "As time flows onward everything in the world is constantly changing...nothing is eternal." - Unknown "You can't shake hands with a clenched fist." - Indira Gandhi "I know what you're thinking: 'Did he fire six shots or only five?' But to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I've kinda lost track myself. But being this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: "Do I feel lucky?" Well, do ya, punk?" - Dirty Harry "There are two types of humans...pigs who feed on human rights, and starving wolves! And wolves love to feast on fat pigs!" - Riki-Oh At age 8, your dad buys you an ice cream. You thanked him by dripping When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was in fashion. When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp. When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug. When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take care of him. You And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came Number your 12 fave Naruto characters (In no order) and answer the questions!! Naruto Hinata Ino Madara Kushina Tsunade Shizune Garra Temari Itachi Kyubbi pein 1) Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fanfic before? Tsunade and Kyubi? no t happening 2) Do you think Four is hot? How hot? I don't swing THAT way 3) What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant? I don't like Mpregs 4) Do you recall any fics about Nine? Yeah, some of them are my fave ones are with one. 5) Would Two and Six make a good couple? It would be a dream of every boob fan boy. 6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten. five/nine, yuri is awesome 7) What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex? She'd probably call naruto to re-dead twelve 8) Make up a summary of a Three/Ten Fanfic? during a recon mission Ino gets captured by itachi and learns the perpose of the mangyeko. 9) Is there any such thing as a One/Eight fluff? It will be more of a 'buddy-fic.' 10) Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve Hurt/Comfort fic. healing pein 11) What kind of plot would you use if you wanted Four to de-flower One? 3 words: shut. up. now. 12) Does anyone on your friends list read Three het? i have no friends 13) Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven? see 12 14) Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five see 13 15) What might ten scream at a moment of great passion? Itachi? Screaming? errorsystem failure. 16) If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose? let the bodies hit the floor-drowning pool 17) If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be? Basic parental warning, but with two shinobi and a konochi gettin busy 18) What might be a good pick-up line for Ten to use on Two? Let me put my mangyekou in your byakugan. 19) How might Eleven describe a relationship between Two and Eight? They are friends 20) How emo is Seven? not at all A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him. Chuck Norris Facts Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month. When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement. Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there. In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten. Chuck Norris put humpty dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the face. Later Chuck dined on scrambled eggs with all the king's horses and all the king's men. The king himself could not attend for unspecified reasons. Coincidentally, the autopsy revealed the cause of death to be a roundhouse kick to the face. There is only one King. Chuck Norris knows where Carmen Sandiego is. Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer. Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one. Chuck Norris' evil twin brother, Richard Simmons, once approached Chuck with the hope of reconciliation, but at the sight of Richard's curly, well kept hair, Chuck Norris became so enraged that he turned green with hate and ripped Richard Simmons arms and legs off. This action was the origin of the Marvel Comic badass, The Incredible Hulk. If paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, what beats all 3 at the same time? Answer: Chuck Norris. Although it is not common knowledge, there are actually three sides to the Force: the light side, the dark side, and Chuck Norris. When Chuck Norris was denied a Bacon McMuffin at McDonalds because it was 10:35, he roundhouse kicked the store so hard it became a KFC. Chuck Norris is Luke Skywalker’s real father. After much debate, President Truman decided to drop the atomic bomb on Hiroshima rather than the alternative of sending Chuck Norris. It was more "humane". The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. there were no survivors and the pilot episode tape has been burned. Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch." Faster than a speeding bullet ... more powerful than a locomotive ... able to leap tall buildings in a single bound... yes, these are some of Chuck Norris's warm-up exercises. Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking. A picture is worth a thousand words. A Chuck Norris is worth 1 billion words. When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side. When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part. Archeologists unearthed an old english dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris" When Ranma Saotome killed the Phoenix God King Saffron, Chuck Norris, being a half a world away, looked up in pride, smiled and said “that’s my boy!” Chuck Norris has a Chance in Hell. Originally the Joker was Chuck’s arch-foe, but one roundhouse kick later, his skin turned white, his hair green and he headed for Gotham. You really want to know how Joker got those scars? Chuck roundhouse kicked him in the face. The reason why Outworld hadn’t went for their tenth win against Earth realm is because Raiden threatened to get Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris can defeat Darkside’s optic blasts with a roundhouse kick. (There os a pic of this on Deviantart.com) Chuck got Sparda, Dante’s father, out of hell. Master Chief is Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris was sent ten thousand years to the past, met and married a goddess who in turn gave him a daughter. We know the child as: Sailor Moon. Chuck doesn’t wash his dishes, they get clean out of fear. OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing. RIP We shall remember A teenage girl about 17 had gone to visit She ended up staying longer than As she walked along under the tall elm When she reached the alley, which was a However, halfway down the alley she She became uneasy and began to pray, Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness When she reached the end of the alley, The following day, she read in the Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and Thanking the Lord for her safety and to She felt she could recognize the man, so The police asked her if she would be She agreed and immediately pointed out When the man was told he had been The officer thanked Diane for her bravery She asked if they would ask the man one Diane was curious as to why he had not When the policeman asked him, he Amazingly, whether you believe or not, Repost this as Love vs. Sex if you truly PS: God is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what... and if you stand up for him he will Our world is different. Our world today is made from terrorisom as a bomb that blow up and kill inoocnet people. Our world today is made up of hunger as kids who kill each other to get a bowl of rice. Our world today is made up of bullets as they enter the so called enemies body. Our world today is made of money as the have many and the many have few. Our world today comes from sweat as workers sweat in work shops over their long hours. Our world today comes from fear as people wonder if today is their last. Our world today comes from death as thousands die everyday. Our world today sees blood as a women kills her cheating husband. Our world today sees poverty from as a man scavanges the garbage to find some food to eat. Our world needs ears to hear the cry of the poor. OUr world needs eyes to see our own faults. Our world needs hands to help others stand. Our world needs feet to keep progressing. Our world needs hope to see a better day. Our world needs love so that we may stand together as brothers and sisters in arms. Our world needs strenght to perservere through tough times. Our world needs Unity so that we may work out our differences and make a better life for all. Our world needs: We are creatures of amazing potential. It is not whether we want use that potential or not but rather can we. If we are to move forward as a human race then we must make sure that no one is left behind. For if we do than we are spread apart and weaker, so that a strong force could divide us and turn us against each other. It is evident that in all things we are simple parts of the greater unison. It is only when we see that, we can truly progress. Copy and Paste this onto your profile if you believe in the Human race -TenchiSawada This is really sweet... When a girl is quiet, a million things are running through her mind. When a girl is not arguing, she is thinking deeply. When a girl looks at you with her eyes full of question, she is wondering how long you will be around. When a girl answers "I'm fine." after a few seconds, she is not fine at all. When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are lying. When a girl rests her head on your chest, she is wishing for you to be her's forever. When a girl wants to see you everday, she wants to be pampered. When a girl says "I love you." she means it. When a girl says "I miss you." nobody could miss you more than that. Life only comes around once, so make sure you spend it with the right person. Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, and calls you back when you hang up on him. The guy who will stay awake just to watch you sleep. Wait for the guy who kisses your forehead, Who wants to show you off to the world when you are in your sweats. The one who holds your hand in front of his friends and is constantly reminding you of how much he cares about you and how lucky he is to have you there for him. The one who turns to his friends and declares "That's her.". If you read this, you have to repost it, guy or girl, or you will have bad luck for the rest of your life. If you repost this, in five minutes your true love will call or message you. Tonight at midnight, they will realize that they love you. Something good will happen at approximately 1:42 pm tomorrow, and it could happen anywhere. So get ready for the biggest shock of your life. If you don't repost this, you will be cursed with relationship problems for all of eternity. Repost this to your profile, and spare yourself the emotional stress. I'd be this boyfriend: When she walks away from you mad, follow her When she stares at your mouth, kiss her When she pushes you or hits you, grab her and don't let go When she starts cussing at you, kiss her and tell her you love her When she's quiet, ask her whats wrong When she ignores you, give her your attention When she pulls away, pull her back When you see her at her worst, tell her she's beautiful When you see her start crying, just hold her and don't say a word When you see her walking, sneak up and hug her waist from behind When she's scared, protect her When she lays her head on your shoulder, tilt her head up and kiss her When she steals your favorite hat, let her keep it and sleep with it for a night When she teases you, tease her back and make her laugh When she doesn't answer for a long time, reassure her that everything is okay When she looks at you with doubt, back yourself up When she says that she likes you, she really does more than you could understand When she grabs at your hands, hold hers and play with her fingers When she bumps into you, bump into her back and make her laugh When she tells you a secret, keep it safe and untold When she looks at you in your eyes, don't look away until she does When she misses you, she's hurting inside When you break her heart, the pain never really goes away When she says it’s over, she still wants you to be hers When she reposts this bulletin, she wants you to read it When she's mad, hug her tight and don't let go When she says she's ok, don't believe it, talk with her- because 10 years later she'll remember you When she's bored and sad, hang out with her. Let her know she's important. Kiss her in the pouring rain. When she runs up at you crying, the first thing you say is; "Whose ass am I kicking, babe?" If you do post this in the next four minutes the one you love will: |
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