La la la la la la la la...

(repeats in irritating monotone for very long time)

...la la la la la..

(irritated readers walk in and smack the back of head)

...la la Ouch! Thank you!

Sorry about that, it was either go insane or wash my eye balls and brain out with bleach. Why? Oh, I just got finished reading some...evil...fanfictions about relationships that shouldn't be thought of let alone read. You want to know which ones? I just said they shouldn't be read didn't I? Sigh, well I shouldn't talk. I happened to hint at one in a story I'm posting so you can take a hint when you read it. It's one of the milder ones too. You want hard core 'Just plain wrong!' you'll have to find them elsewhere.

So...any...way...I...hope...you...will...(smack) enjoy the stories I post, when I do post them...

You'll have to forgive me since I'm still...recovering...

Trust me, I am recovering. If I remember the site/ fiction that made me this way (or at least worse) I'll post it so you can suffer along with me. Erhem...I mean uh, well, ok so I really do mean suffer.

Aren't I nice? Am I? I am? No? Well why did you say I was? You didn't? I did?

(smack, smack, smack, smack...goes on for a while...s...ma..ck...huff... huff)

He he he sounds like the readers are getting tired...Why am I not writhing in pain or at least a little dazzed? Because that's how I was before the smacks. They made me a little 'better', I suppose you could say.

Sigh, well, be happy and pray I never find the offending site because you know that your morbid curiosity will force you to check it out. Then you will, ah, be as interesting a package as I am now. Nighmares come included, dissasembly may be required, warrenty broken guranteed.

(Maniacle laughter drifts off into the distance and you wonder if Kin'iro Neko is really gone)

"Is she?" a voice suddenly asks from behind you (you of course jump)

Oh me, right, um... guess not.

(Maniacle laughter starts up again. You'd better go now... quickly; quietly; and very, very fast.)