A series of drabbles and oneshots about all the times Nico can be kind of ridiculous. We all love him, and know he's amazing and awesome and hot and all that, but when you think about it, Nico's still just a kid, and sometimes he just makes you want to sigh and say, "Oh, Nico." These are some of those times. FINALLY UPDATED 8/29/17 SORRY I KNOW I'M THE WORST.

"This camp isn't for me. I don't belong." A few years after Nico said this, some Campers apparently agreed. Will Nico find a new home at Hogwarts or will he meet rejection there as well? Will he even want to return to Camp Half-Blood when they need him? No slash. Ignores 'Heroes of Olympus' series, though characters from it might appear.

Harry Potter wakes at Camp Half-Blood. Percy Jackson wakes at Hogwarts. Neither know who they are, where they are, or where they come from, but when dreams are invaded, prophecies are conjured and revelations arise, they discover the line between demigod and wizard is blurring. Something dark is coming, and Percy and Harry must unite with their new peers before it's too late.

Levi has a secret: he and Eren have something in common. Sort of. Besides killing titans. (wingfic)

Erwin's little team of superheroes aren't exactly the most popular - they don't play by the rules; they get stuff done. When they find out that the villain they've been tracking (what kind of name is Levi for a supervillain, anyway?) is actually a shapeshifter, things get rough. When they try to rehabilitate him, things get rougher.

Petunia married a biochemist, and Harry grew up reading science and science fiction. Then came the Hogwarts letter, and a world of intriguing new possibilities to exploit. And new friends, like Hermione Granger, and Professor McGonagall, and Professor Quirrell... COMPLETE.

A collection of drabbles and ficlets featuring Levi and Petra. Includes prompts from Rivetra Week.

"So come and watch the sunset with me?" Solangelo. Post - Blood of Olympus.

Medical!AU where Nico is the medical examiner working the graveyard shift, Annabeth is his Sherlock Holmes-level asshole of a coworker, and Will is the stereotypical hot doctor who's actually about as straight as a boomerang. Solangelo Oneshot

"My time has been occupied by more important things. Transporting statues. Bargaining with titans. Saving the world and all that. I've been busy," Nico said, sipping nectar from a straw. "Dude," Will's facial expression was so serious he looked like someone just cursed his whole family, "no one is ever too busy to read Harry Potter. Ever."

Finally, a reunion with words between Levi and his squad. COMPLETE.

'Jason wished he could put a bell around Nico di Angelo's neck to remind him the guy was there.' - The House of Hades. In which Jason, Percy and Leo indeed put a bell around Nico di Angelo's neck, and find out what a bad idea it is. One-shot.

AU: It's funny how quickly and inaccurately information can travel. Rivetra.

AU: She smiles at him and decides he is the one she will convince to set her free. Rivetra.

AU: In which roommates Levi and Petra try to convince their friends they're not dating. Rivetra.

Levi watches them, watches them grow harder and tougher and colder, watches the life drain from their eyes a little more each day, and he wonders how much longer it will be before they all die. Oneshot.

"Reyna thought about her options here. On one hand, it really wasn't her business and playing teen counselor wasn't really at the top of her list on how she wanted to spend the rest of this trip. But on the other hand, she'd been that person. She knew what it felt like to be the odd one out, and she definitely knew what a broken heart was like." Nico and Reyna on the way to Camp.

Four times Levi lied to Petra. Rivetra.

"She's a stalker of little children, but in her defense, these are her friends. Granted, they all died years ago, but whatever. They're all back now and that's all that matters." In which the heroes of Olympus try for the Isles of the Blest and Thalia watches.

After an attempt on her life, Apollo decides Rachel needs a bodyguard and who best to fill that position than a certain son of Hades? Too bad they're not going to make things easy for each other, especially when it comes to their feelings. Rachel/Nico.

Assumes that Jason isn't anyone's boyfriend (yet), and features Leo and Piper teasing Jason about his crush on a certain Ghost King. Warning: Puns, dirty jokes, and lame compliments are included. No actual act of coitus has been explained in detail in this fic.

Things change, people grow, and Percy Jackson is no exception. / The character growth of Percy through the eyes of Annabeth. WARNING: Minor spoilers for House of Hades!

"Rays break at the flaming shore" The prophecy has come true but the adventure continues. Join separated familiar characters at the opposing two camps. This is the story behind The Mark of Athena. How did things go when the Seven great heroes travel to Rome and Greece, leaving Camp Jupiter and Camp Half-blood in chaos? We gave it our best shot. Please R&R.

In which Leo Valdez keeps a promise, and not by half. Oneshot. House of Hades spoilers.

Alliance AU. Sequel to Breaking the Gods. With Nico's soul at stake, Percy takes a risk and reveals all that they've been hiding to Annabeth, Thalia, and Jason. United with the Kanes, a desperate search begins, but no one can foresee where it will take them, or what they'll find along the way.

Levi declares a one-man war on the sorry state of the military's pants (because whoever decided white was a good color for them was clearly an imbecile). Erwin is worried.

Nico's and Percy's relationship was messy, complete with backstabbing and lying, and most of the time, Nico was to blame. But breaking a promise? That one was on Percy.

A collection of one-shots focusing on Percy's bullies. Chapter 1: While working at Caribou, Nancy recognizes an old rival. Chapter 2: Clarisse meets a chip-toothed punk. Chapter 3: Sloan meets his old nemesis in unlikely circumstances. Chapter 4: Isabel Gonzalez. Chapter 5: The "Old Sot." Chapter 6: Octavian. Chapter 7: Drew Tanaka. Chapter 8: Gabe Ugliano. Chapter 9: ?

Nico/Rachel drabbles, mostly conversation. Because they're turning out to be so cute, I don't know what to do with them. Innuendo, language, evil relatives and cliched scenarios. Indulge away.

Levi has nightmares and Hanji can't sleep, so they might as well keep each other company. There's nothing a glass of milk and a good bedtime story can't fix. — LeviHan

As an Analyst, Percy Jackson is used to having to protect the lives of famous people from ruthless assassins known as Mechanics. But as the arrival of his cousin and the details of his next job both coincide and life gets a lot more complicated, he starts to unwind the conspiracy of the assassins and uncovers dark secrets about his past that he'd prefer to have stayed hidden.

Because he's Slytherin and she's Ravenclaw and these things never work out long term, but that doesn't mean you can't try. - DracoLuna.

Piper McLean thinks that she understands Leo Valdez. But he keeps proving her wrong, again and again—Dark AU. Sequel to The Bridges Ablaze.

Former name: Nico's Double Troubles The story behind The Son of Neptune. What happens when Nico goes looking for the Doors of Death to speed up his friends' progress? How exactly did Nico got captured by Gaea? We try our best to be loyal to Rick's writing style, characters and storyline. PLEASE have a try.

A stolen sacred item. A rising ancient power. Ghosts from the past and dark plans for the future. Just an average few days for Nico di Angelo, son of Hades.

Edward gets detention. Umbridge is not amused.

Rachel knew it was a bad idea to get a crush on Percy. She knew it, accepted it, and... ignored it. Some things you just can't help, right? One-sided Perachel, kind-of a friend fic. One shot. Set between BoTL and TLO.

Because neither of them knew what it felt like to be losing her. Something like love and death, except not really. [Rima/Ikuto, Amu, oneshot, au]

The only person Piper McLean fails to save (and love) is Leo Valdez—Dark AU. Phoenix Awards Cup of Tea Challenge #2 Winter Woes.

Alliance AU. Nico infiltrates a boarding school that's been conducting experiments on demigods, and discovers a plot far more twisted than anything he ever expected. Cut off from Percy and Camp Halfblood, as well as Anubis and the Kanes as they struggle in their fight against Apophis, Nico must turn to a new ally, the Roman demigod Jason Grace, if he has any hope of surviving.

Behind every twenty-four-year-old half-Italian son of Hades is a redheaded Oracle who is the cause of his profession, and boy does Rachel never let him forget it. Nico/Rachel Oneshot

/Lan FanxLing Yao/ His father had fifty wives and his father's father had fifty wives and all the fathers before him had half a hundred wives of their own.

Rima may be beautiful on the outside, but her ugly personality is too much for anyone to handle. After being cursed by a witch, she has a year to find someone to teach her how to do the impossible: love the beauty within.

Seventeen year old Max goes to boarding school for a dose of normal. But when complete stranger Nick Ride seems more familiar to her then any of her own friends or family, her only idea is that her entire life must be a lie. Action, and Fax.

During SoN, when our trio went into the library after Ella, what if a particular book had caught Percy's eye? The author seemed to draw him in... the woman's face sharing similar features. Why does she look so familiar? One-shot, Percy's POV.

Colin Creevey leaves his camera with a muggle girl but never returns to collect it.

Being a stepdad to a teenager is hard. Being a stepdad to a demigod is harder.

After a shadow traveling incident Nico is sent to Britain. With his luck he manages to get himself stuck in Grimmauld place. Will he get rescued or be stuck with a bunch of crazy stick people who call themselves wizards?

You're fifteen years old and you think no one can break your heart like he does. [Yaya-centric/Kairi, older, au]

Or 'How Nico and Rachel manage to cohabit without killing each other.' Because when it comes to the Oracle and the Ghost King living together, every day is bound to be exciting. That, or just irritating and/or mildly entertaining. Nico/Rachel Oneshot

In which Alex Louis Armstrong meets Walburga Black's portrait...and it is exactly as traumatizing as it sounds.

Our bodies were crushed together so tightly, not even a slip of paper could come in between us. Our mouths slipped over one another, slick from the rain that trickled down our faces and dripped off our eyelashes. One-shot, FAX, post book three.

Jason's supposed to be the one for her. So why is Annabeth drawn to the dark haired son of Neptune instead? AU for Heroes of Olympus. Annabeth/Jason, Percy/Annabeth

These heroes were all the same: loyal and cruel. Loyal to their comrades they needed to help in battle, cruel to leave her for another thousand years. But soon after the last hero, Nico di Angelo shows up on her shores. Oh, why is fate so cruel?

Harry and Hermione are sick of Ginny and Ron shoving their relationships in their faces. So, when Hermione gets the idea for them to pretend to date, Harry agrees. Because, it's only pretend, right? H/Hr. HBP.

Hades had the brilliant idea to send Nico on a Guardian Angel Mission to someone who cannot be saved, and doesn't want to be. When Tom Riddle is eleven years old, he gets two visitors in one day. And one just keeps on visiting. Time skips, Oneshot.

A number of scenarios where Rachel Dare and Nico di Angelo got together. Option One; The one in which there is mutual bonding, sharing an apartment and a lot of gradualism.

"The only thing predictable about him is his unpredictability. I mean, I'm the Oracle and even I can't keep up." Oneshot; Nico/Rachel

"Lord knows Edward was never going to get a clue, but Winry finally got the kick in the pants she needed to make a move." This is that kick in the pants. Or The Dangers of Meeting Childhood Friends.

Where do green-eyed male drug addicts and blonde girls who cut themselves meet and fall in love? That's right. In a mental hospital.

Alliance AU. Thanks to Anubis' ritual going wrong, while Sadie and Carter are off saving the world in ToF, Nico is stuck in the Duat, dodging dangers, saving Bast's skin, and most importantly, finding Sadie the perfect birthday present.

Nico's Christmas was going well. Too well. It isn't long before his peace is disturbed. The life of a son of Hades is never a quiet one. Two-shot.

Sometimes, Annabeth just needs to get away from everything and clear her head. Nico is the last person she would ever expect to understand this - but he just might surprise her. Oneshot; post Lost Hero; hints of Percabeth; Annabeth/Nico friendship.

My name is Nico di Angelo. And I'm gonna teach you how to be badass. T for excessive use of the word "badass."

Nico shadow travels to London and breaks into Number 11, Grimmauld Place to stay the night. He sets off an alarm system Moody set up to know if anyone was trying to find Number 12. Naturally, the wizards have to bring him in.

Annabeth pretends, Percy lies, and Thalia is oblivious to it all. Nominated for the Phoenix Awards 2013 - Romance

Ed is traumatized by high school field trips to Eastern Command.

Nico/Rachel Oneshot. Girlfriend or not, she feels like she doesn't deserve to be introduced to the most important woman in Nico di Angelo's life.

Sequel to The Death God Alliance. Nico, Percy, Sadie, and Carter must work fast to prevent another inter-pantheon incident when mysterious deaths start occurring at Camp Half-Blood right after the Kanes are accidentally picked up in a demigod extraction.

He is not alone, the list assures him, and he'll never be alone so long as he remembers. Percy centric, post-TLH.

One Shot. Destiny knocks, but this time, Harry Potter isn't home.

Nico gets stuck babysitting Percy and Annabeth's three-year-old child, Rachel ditches a high-brow party, and unusual childcare ensues. Rachel/Nico, sequel to my "Knocked Up" fic, and also recently revised!

The longer Harry talked to Edward Elric, the less he seemed to know about the strange boy.

NicoRachel with slight PercyAnnabeth OneShot. In which Nico messes with Rachel's cooking, and Rachel messes with Nico on Christmas. The Oracle, forbidden from having a relationship? Tch. More like forbidden from the kitchen.

Every night, Rachel draws.

In the grand scheme of things, this isn't much at all. But at least it's somewhere to start again. Percy/Annabeth. Spoilers for The Lost Hero within.

In which what seems like a normal rescue mission actually ends up sucking pretty hard for Nico when Persephone gets meddling. Cinderella's step-mom has got nothing on Nico's.

"Sorry," said the son of Hades, "but if I surrendered to an organization called the House of Life, my dad would kill me." After a run in with the Kanes, Nico unwittingly ends up becoming a host for the Egyptian death god Anubis.

Oneshot, NicoAnnabeth & Percabeth/ She goes to his room whenever she's tired and eventually, after a lot of arguing with himself and tons of self-loathing, he'll climb in next to her and try to convince himself this isn't the worst type of betrayal.

Nico is cordially invited to dine with his father and stepmother in Hades. They said he could bring a friend. He does, but what he leaves with is something a little different from leftovers after inciting the wrath of Persephone. Oneshot

The five times Edward Elric made Winry Rockbell shiver...and the one time he didn't.

Sally/Poseidon, started out trying to be as canon as possible. Nevertheless managed to involve a toothless old man and Amphitrite. Now stuck in a continuity rut. Read at your own peril.

Snapshots of a life as Annabeth Chase grows up in a world where Thalia never turns into a tree, Luke's destiny is something else entirely, and a certain son of Poseidon never makes it to Camp Half-Blood. Alternate universe.

Rachel/Nico. An Oracle of Apollo dating a Son of Hades was weird enough before Valentine's Day entered into the picture. Written for the ShadowPalace/WindowChild Oneshot Challenge, Week 6.

One Shot. AU. A marriage contract. They want him to sign away his freedom and his future and his life on a girl who didn't even attend her best friend's funeral. Harry has other ideas.

The true story of how Harry and Ginny's kids got their names. Really, it's all Snape's fault. Crackfic oneshot.

Vague spoilers for PS-HBP. One-shot. James Potter observes as Harry arrives to an alternate dimension where his parents are alive and Neville is the Boy-Who-Lived. Trying to teach old cliches new tricks, here.

During a family outing at the London Zoo, Harry has an unexpected encounter with Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia. But what happens when the Dursleys must deal with Harry's wife . . . Luna Lovegood!

Haruhi finally sees what is written in Kyoya's notebook.

All Haruhi wanted in life was to get through school relatively unscathed. Hikaru and Kaoru have just found their new toy in the form of a very pretty, intelligent, and highly oblivious female scholarship student.

There are some things the human race is not meant to know. Harry didn't care instead, he made it his life's purpose to learn them. Oneshot

Hikaru and Kaoru play a game. But how is Haruhi supposed to join when even the twins themselves don't know the rules?

Postmovie. Noah reflects on what Ed leaves unspoken. But don't let that worry you, this is Edwin. Oneshot, rather drabblelike in nature.

Lily Evans has been distracted lately…and it’s all because of James Potter and his stupid, unbuttoned shirt. Hardly any fluff, but plenty of shirtless James for everybody. Seventh year fic.

The truth was, it didn't matter to the twins whether or not people could tell them apart.

Most women marry men like their fathers. This is the real reason mothers cry at weddings. HaruhixTamaki.

Hands can tell a lot about a person...EdxWin oneshot

This fic contains FMA end of series spoilers, do not read if you don't want to be spoiled. FMA&Harry Potter crossover, but I promise this one makes sense. Professor Edward Elric takes an interest in a brilliant student by the name of Tom Marvolo Riddle.

[one shot] [EdWinry] Sometimes, you need someone else to fit all the ragged fragments of yourself together....

Does it hurt?" Ed's in for repairs, and Winry hits a nerve...literally. Humor, one-shot, highly uncomfortable Edward, hints of hormonal EdWin

A's for Amanda Our hero's twin sister Got lost as a baby and Gosh, how he missed her...

Written for a drabble challenge - "Let me introduce this year's Defence Against The Dark Arts teacher. Class, this is Col. Mustang." Crossover with Harry Potter. I have no excuse.