...The levels of insanity are as follows: Normal, Sane, Insane, OMFG!!!!!, Holy FUCKING ASS CRACKERS!!!!, Rex. I'm Admiral Rex... 'nough said.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you are obsessed with fan fiction copy this into your profile.

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. Copy this into your profile if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "where to begin?"

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?" Put this on your profile.

92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombieand Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your ass off.

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile.

95 of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the 5 who aren't, copy this into your profile.

92 percent of the teenage population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch said it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Put this in your profile if you're part of the 8 percent that would be laughing their ass off.

If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!

If you love the music you listen to, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have a story in your head, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

98 percent of authors confuse "You're" and "Your", or "It's" or "Its". If you're one of the 2 percent who knows how to tell them apart, copy and paste this into your profile.

1% of the authors will pause after typing a sentence if it has "You're" or "Your" in it, just to make sure it's right. Copy and paste onto your if you've ever done that.

If you read your own stories or profile just for the heck of it, or if you write about stuff that you want to read, copy and paste this to your profile

If you've ever wondered what it was like in another dimension, copy this onto your profile.

If you think the human identification thing when you log onto fan fiction is slightly annoying sometimes, copy this onto your profile.

If you've ever wondered who made up all these copy and paste things, copy this onto your profile.

If fan fiction is to you what MySpace is to other people, copy this onto your profile.

If your profile is a never-ending state of change, copy this onto your profile.

1F YOU C4N UND3R574ND 7H15 M355463, COPY 4ND P4573 17 1N70 YOUR PROF1L3.

If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile. Past four can do as well.

If you are one of the few teens who don't have or want to have a myspace, facebook, or twitter copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have siblings that drive you crazy then copy this onto your profile.

If you keep a list of one liners to use in your stories, copy and paste to your profile.

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are unconcerned by the dismal state of their education, or the fact that their fanfiction is raping the English language. If you're part of the five percent of fanfiction writers/readers who do care about such things, cut and paste this, and then leave reviews for those poor souls who know not what they are doing. Chubs34

I'm Sorry

I'm sorry
that I bought you roses to tell you that I like you
I'm sorry
That I was raised with respect and not to sleep with you when you were drunk
I'm sorry
That my body's not ripped enough to "satisfy" your wants
I'm sorry
that I open your car door and pull out your chair like I was raised
I'm sorry
That I'm not cute enough to be "your guy"
I'm sorry
That I am actually nice and not a jerk
I'm sorry
I don't have a huge bank account to buy you expensive things
I'm sorry
I like to spend quality nights at home cuddling with you, instead of at a club
I'm sorry
I would rather make love to you then just screw you like some random guy.
I'm sorry
That I am always the one you need to talk to, but never good enough to date
I'm sorry
That I always held your hair back when you threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car, but when we went out you went home with another guy
I'm sorry
That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere, but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend
I'm sorry
If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around
I'm sorry
If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work
I'm sorry
that you can't realize.. I've been the one all along.
I'm sorry
If you read this and know somebody like this but you just don't fucking care

But most of all

I'm sorry
For not being sorry anymore
I'm sorry
That you can't accept me for who I am
I'm sorry
I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good enough to make it in your world.
I'm sorry
I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for...
I'm sorry
That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.
I'm sorry
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.
I'm sorry
That I cared
I'm sorry
that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.

Ladies/ always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.

If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'

If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things'

This is a real story.

A 16 year old teenager was RAPED. She later learned that she was pregnant with her rapist's child. She wanted an abortion, but her father, a die-hard christian, refused, saying it was her fault she was raped, and it was god's way of punishing her. Or, she was impregnated by a friend, and had the baby without the father, who ran away, if you can call someone like that a father.

She had the baby of a RAPIST, and her grades dropped drastically, as well as her mental condition, physical health, and her happiness. She later killed herself, both due to her father's spite and the stress of being a single, teenae mother, and her bastard child went on to impregnate YET ANOTHER 16 year old, then ran away, as to not deal with the child, thereby restarting the cycle.

If you think abortion is okay in certain circumstances, copy and paste this to your profile. IN CERTAIN SITUATIONS! PER SE: BEING RAPED! But if you don't want the child, then you should've used protection, or PULLED THE FUCK OUT. SERIOUSLY. IT'S NOT THAT DIFFERENT.

Religon is a method of controlling a population. It made an eternal life, just to scare kids. IT made sins to keep people in line. Theocracies are bound to fail. "Good" Cristians are fanatics who can't stand other religons, when it plainly says that you should be accpetant of others. IF you think religon if a load of BS, copy and paste to your profile. Chubs34

40 Things To Do In An Elevator
1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside, and ask, "Got enough air in there?"
2. Stand silent and motionless in one corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to open the doors, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open by themselves.
4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them all to call you Admiral.
5. Meow occasionally.
6. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" and back away slowly.
7. Say "DING!" at every floor.
8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.
9. Make explosion noises whenever someone else presses a button.
10. Stare, grinning, at another person for a while, then say, "I have new socks on."
11.When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, "Is that your beeper?"
12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.
13. Draw a little square with chalk on the floor then say to the other passengers, "This is my personal space."
14. When there's only one other person on the elevator, tap them on the shoulder then pretend it wasn't you.
15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug with the other passengers. Tell them that you will never forget them.
16. Ask if you can push the buttons for other people, but push the wrong ones.
17. Hold the doors open and say that you're waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close and say, "Hi, Greg. How's your day been?"
18. Drop a pen and wait until someone bends to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.
20. Pretend that you're a flight attendant, and review emergency exits with the other passengers.
21. Swat at flies that don't exist.
22. Yell, "Group hug!", then enforce it.
23. Make race car noises when someone gets on or off.
24. Congratulate all for being in the same lift as you.
25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you just shut UP!"
26. Walk in with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!", then whistle innocently.
28. Let your cell phone ring--don't answer it.
29. Walk into the lift and say, "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."
30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when others don't.
31. Ask people which floor they want, then say, "Is that your final answer?"
32. Also in your bellboy act, ask people what floor they want. Whenever they answer, give them a glare and say, "You should be ashamed of yourself!"
33. Ask loudly, "Did you feel that?"
34. Tell different people that you can see their aura.
35. When the door closes, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
36. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."
37. Start breathing heavily and grab your chest when someone walks in. Then stumble out gasping for air.
38. If you are the only one in the lift, press all the buttons then stand and stare at the door, waiting for someone to come in.
39. If someone looks at you, laugh maniacally and tell them that you're there for the mental health convention.
40. Dress up in a long black cloak with a hood, stare at everyone, and in a deep voice announce: "It is time..."

I Have A Few Questions . . .
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?
Can you cry under water?
How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
Why do you have to 'put your two cents in'... but it's only a 'penny for your thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
What disease did cured ham actually have?
How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
Why is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like every two hours?
If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
Why is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Do stairs go up or down?
Do coffins have lifetime guarantees?
When French people swear do they say “Pardon my English?”
Why does the last piece of ice always stick to the bottom of the cup?
Why do they put Braille on the drive through bank machines?
If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?
If a person with Multiple Personality Disorder threatens to kill themselves, is it considered a hostage situation?

These are actual instruction labels from certain comsumer goods...

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping
(Gee, that's the only time I have to fix my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap
(And that would be...how?)
On some Swann TV dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost
(But that's just a suggestion, of course)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert:
(printed on bottom of box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late; you lose!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Seriously? Let's experiment!)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save time? And whose body, exactly?)
On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine:
Do not drive or operate machinery.
(We could really do a lot to reduce construction accidents if we would keep the 5-year-olds off the fork lifts)
On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: May cause drowsiness
(One can only hope)
On Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: Keep out of children.
(Hmmm, something must have gotten lost in the translation...)
On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(Yeah, as opposed to using it in outer space)
On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm really curious)
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: Contains nuts
(But no peas?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.
(I wonder who thought that one up)
On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this)
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garmet does not enable flight.
(Oh, go ahead! That's right, destroying a universal childhood belief!) Chubs34

Friend: Will help me find my way when I'm lost
Best Friend: Will be the one messing with my compass, stealing my map and giving me bad directions
Friend: Will help me learn to drive
Best Friend: Will help me roll the car into the lake so I can collect insurance
Friend: Will watch my pets when I go away
Best Friend: Won't let me go away
Friend: Will go to a concert with me
Best Friend: Will kidnap the band with me
Friend: Calls my parents "Mr." or "Mrs."
Best Friend: Calls my parents "Mom" or "Dad"
Friend: Asks me for my number
Best friend: Asks me for his number
Friend: Hides me from the cops
Best Friend: is probably the reason they are after me in the first place
Friend: lets me make an idiot of myself in public
Best Friend: Is up there with me making an idiot out of himself too.
FRIENDS: Will comfort you when she rejects you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will go up and ask him, "It's because you're a lesbian, isn't it?"
FRIENDS: Will be there for you when she breaks up with you.
BEST FRIENDS: Will call her up and whisper, "Seven days, bitch..."
FRIENDS: Helps you up when you fall.
BEST FRIENDS: Keeps on walking saying, "Walk much, dumb ass?"
FRIENDS: Will ask you if you're okay when you're crying.
BEST FRIENDS: Will laugh at you and say, "Ha Ha, Loser!"
FRIENDS: Will offer you a soda.
BEST FRIENDS: Will dump theirs on you.
FRIENDS: Will sit at the side of the pool with you at that time of the month.
BEST FRIENDS: Will throw you a tampon and push you in.
FRIENDS: Gives you their umbrella in the rain.
BEST FRIENDS: Takes yours and says, "Run BITCH Run!"
FRIENDS: Will help you move.
BEST FRIENDS: Will help you move the bodies.
FRIENDS: Will bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be in the room next to you saying, "That was awesome! Let's do it again!"
FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.
FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.
FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.
FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."
FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...
FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds ass that left you
FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."
FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.
FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.
FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away from you when they think you've had enough.
BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place & say "Dude! Drink the rest of that! You know we don't waste! CHUG, CHUG, CHUG!"
Friends: Will ask you to be their wingman.
Best friends: Will get your ass laid, TONIGHT.

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time , Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In".\
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds".
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy".\
8. Don't use any punctuation.
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go".
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme?
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!"
18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go."
20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity. Chubs34

If anyone objects to my insanity...(pulls out anal probe from "Destroy all Humans 2.) SPEAK NOW OR FOREVER HOLD YOUR PEACE!!!!!! :) I like me. I CAN DO THIS BECAUSE I'M ME!!! (Standing up

side down.) I support the following: M4r1n3s, 4rmy, P4n7h3rs, B0b4 F377. Hey can anyone understand that besides me??? That is all. DISMISSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :

RedvsBlue is AWEsome, Seth green is hilarious, M.E., Halo, MoH, And COD are the GREATEST gemes ever...

Cipher;Blaze;Talisman;Mobious. Win.

Pixy;Grabacr;Strigon;Yellow. Fail.

?qh=ion=&global=1&q=narutorejectedactors#/de9paq Whered that come from, 'cause didn't write that...

I am bilingual. My first language is Sarcasm. My second one is American.

Has anyone else ever started a bottle cap collection because of fallout? If so copy and paste this to your profile.

Has anyone seen my spleen?

Ultimate dream team: Darth Revan, Master Cheif, Capt. Price, Jango Fett, Scorpion, Ezio, Altair, cmdr. Shepard, Garrus Vakarian, Mordin Solus (I am the very model of a scientist salarian), Marcus Fenix, Woods, Viktor Reznov, Darth Maul, Edward Richtofen Arbiter, HK-47.

I'm smarter than you're.

Where my Soviets at?!