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Joined 05-31-09, id: 1953089, Profile Updated: 08-03-09
Author has written 1 story for Twilight.

I'VE DONE A STORY!! OMG I FEEL SO PROUD. Ahem anyway. Read it. Please? I co-wrote it with my friend.
LoveLove

So, I decided to get rid of all of the crap that was on my profile. It was boring. But I decided to keep the 'Labels's one. I rather like it :)

I really enjoy the Twilight series - I, unlike many people, did actually enjoy Breaking Dawn and how it turned out. However, one little niggle that I do have: I wanted there to be more fighting - someone dying would have made it a lot more believable. My fav out of the four would be New Moon because I am TEAM JACOB! Although I do like Edward, I prefer Jacob. I also prefer Taylor as opposed to Robert (even though I think they are both equally good actors).

Favourate authors:
Stephenie Meyer
JK Rowling
Jodi Picult
Robert Muchomore
Anthony Horowitz
Mike Gayle

Jodi Picoult- 'My sisters keeper' was one of the most tear jerking stories I've read. I have yet to read more of her work, as I hear its quite good, but I haven't had the chance.

If your still reading by this point thanks, and I hope I haven't bored you too much. There is so many more books but I'm tired and it will just drag on, so I wont.

Toodle-pip x

For people that hate stereotypes: If you think people should just shut up and stop, put this on your profile. (BOLD the ones you are.)
I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.
I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists.
I'm a NEGRO so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell.
I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE (or used to take) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend
I'm CUBAN, so I MUST spend my spare time rolling cigars.
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have Big BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and thats how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I must be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so i must be GAY TOO
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
Im a VIRGIN so I MUST be prude
Im STRAIGHT EDGE so I must be violent.
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks
I'm ASIAN so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA (wtf)
I'm MORMON so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black
I'm GOTH so I MUST worship the devil (So I’ve been told)
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.

I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.

My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE.. So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME so I MUST be a freak
I am a FANGIRL so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN so I MUST be perverted.
I'm INTELLIGENT so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.

I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be a HOMOPHOBE.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.
I care about the ENVIRONMENT...I MUST be a tree hugging hippy.
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins.
I'm PAGAN so I MUST worship Satan.
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion.
I'm SWEDISH so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.
I am a WITCH, so I MUST be an OLD HAG and fly on a broomstick.
Ilove YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast.
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG so I MUST be stupid.
I'm Australian so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m GAY so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND so I MUST be Lesbian
I'm NOT CHRISTIAN so I MUST just need converting.
I like marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK and SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist

I'm a PERFECTIONIST so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake
I DON'T LIKE to talk about my personal life so I MUST be having problems
I have tourettes so I must be an attention-seeking, swearing, little bitch
I like FIRE, so i MUST be a pyromaniac

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Dear Order by SilverWolf7007 reviews
"I'm still alive, as you may surmise from this note. Of course, I could be dead and someone is faking the letter to fool you…" Harry is NOT happy about being left at Privet Drive all summer with no one to talk to.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 22 - Words: 29,689 - Reviews: 7030 - Favs: 13,803 - Follows: 11,274 - Updated: 9/19/2016 - Published: 9/17/2006 - Harry P., Hermione G., Luna L. - Complete
Oops, he did it again! by JasperSAYSrelax128 reviews
When the family goes hunting,Emmett and Jasper Bella-sit. They decide to play truth or dare. Contains Jasper in Wal-Mart, Bella kissing, Emmett in jail? and Blue paint...will Emmett get in trouble...AGAIN? Won the Fanpire Fanfiction Best Humor award!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 51 - Words: 68,268 - Reviews: 3137 - Favs: 1,774 - Follows: 591 - Updated: 1/26/2011 - Published: 4/23/2009 - Complete
Feel Good Drag by JasperSAYSrelax128 reviews
Bella is one of the top street racers in Arizona. But when a recent race ends up in a police chase, Renee sends her to live with Charlie in Forks. What happens happens when she discovers an underground racing site, and meets new friends? SUMMARY INSIDE AH
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 24 - Words: 41,450 - Reviews: 1281 - Favs: 785 - Follows: 313 - Updated: 1/26/2011 - Published: 8/13/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Don't Forget by JasperSAYSrelax128 reviews
Bella was changed into a vampire in New Moon when searching for the meadow. Now she has a new family and awesome powers and moves back to Forks....and runs into a certain family. Will they get along? Pranks! REALLY funny!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 18 - Words: 32,715 - Reviews: 645 - Favs: 528 - Follows: 215 - Updated: 1/26/2011 - Published: 5/25/2009 - Complete
The Last Night by I'm At My All Time Low reviews
As I turned to walk away Jacob grabbed my wrist and pulled the sleeve up "Lee...what's this?" I glared and pulled my wrist away. "Nothing." He looked at me and spoke in a whisper. "Have you been...cutting yourself?" Warning: Suicide attempts & self harm
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 14 - Words: 36,141 - Reviews: 267 - Favs: 165 - Follows: 158 - Updated: 8/13/2010 - Published: 4/28/2009 - Jacob, Leah
Becoming A Cullen, Jasper's story by KelliNew reviews
Canon, pre-Twilight. Alice and Jasper joined the Cullens a few weeks ago. Jasper is struggling to become a member of this peculiar family, but he's having problems adjusting to a life so different from anything he's known.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Family - Chapters: 17 - Words: 36,967 - Reviews: 409 - Favs: 329 - Follows: 275 - Updated: 7/31/2010 - Published: 3/8/2009 - Jasper, Edward
Every 28 Days by Surviving Sheika reviews
Bella's suffering from. . .feminine issues. What will Edward do? And the rest of the Cullen family? Read and find out! Rated T to be safe!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 47,084 - Reviews: 78 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 42 - Updated: 7/29/2010 - Published: 2/7/2009 - Bella - Complete
A Place Called Gethsemane by hopesallthings reviews
Edward, Jasper and Emmett are the adopted sons of Carlisle and Esme, struggling to make it through high school while dealing with everything life has thrown their way. Canon pairings AH/AU Warning: contains adult content
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Chapters: 7 - Words: 26,582 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 46 - Follows: 65 - Updated: 7/21/2010 - Published: 6/10/2009 - Carlisle, Jasper
You Are My Sunshine by nothingatlpersonal reviews
Bella Swan is a normal girl,living in a small coastal town.She loves to surf.One day,a new guy E.C moves to town,quickly hitting the surfing crowd.What will their first impressions be of each other?And what has Bella burried deep beneath the surface?
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 13 - Words: 21,544 - Reviews: 116 - Favs: 87 - Follows: 76 - Updated: 5/23/2010 - Published: 5/22/2009 - Edward, Bella
Ithaca is Gorges by giselle-lx reviews
New Moon from Carlisle's and Edward's POV: After the Cullens leave Bella and move to Ithaca, NY, Carlisle fights to keep his family together as Edward's pain threatens to tear them apart. Canon.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Drama - Chapters: 19 - Words: 120,784 - Reviews: 2475 - Favs: 2,114 - Follows: 807 - Updated: 12/7/2009 - Published: 4/12/2009 - Carlisle - Complete
Phone Calls by Rock'n'Slash reviews
8 yr. after BD. Just random hiliarious phone calls between Edward&Jacob, Bella&Nessie, and Emmett&Jasper. Included: u-arent-good-enough-4-my-daughter-ness, all-men-are-idiots-ness, & lets-reek-havic-on-the-poor-pathetic-humans-ness. Some lauguage.MWHAHA!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 71 - Words: 36,725 - Reviews: 1867 - Favs: 521 - Follows: 299 - Updated: 11/14/2009 - Published: 9/15/2008
My Notebook Will Explain by notnowgarrison reviews
The juniors are given a pen pal project for the summer. Who is this mysterious "Insane of Mind" Bella keeps writing to? Who is "Quite Clumsy" Edward is falling in love with? What happens when they start pouring their souls out to each other? AH, OOC
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 30 - Words: 74,777 - Reviews: 1245 - Favs: 899 - Follows: 456 - Updated: 7/30/2009 - Published: 8/6/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Vampire or Werewolf? by JasperSAYSrelax128 reviews
Edward and Jacob switch bodies for a day....Will they be able to handle Edward in a werewolf body, and Jacob in a Vampire body? What does Bella think?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 4 - Words: 4,921 - Reviews: 331 - Favs: 191 - Follows: 95 - Updated: 6/25/2009 - Published: 5/10/2009 - Complete
Shattering Stories by flamanipulator reviews
Embry imprints on a four year old boy. NOT GAY/SLASH, ANYTHING LIKE THAT! The boy is quite the character growing up, giving Embry quite a bit to worry about, especially when he discovers something dark. Please read, give it a chance. Embry POV.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Angst - Chapters: 7 - Words: 20,982 - Reviews: 35 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 5/21/2009 - Published: 4/30/2009 - Embry - Complete
Maria by ahemyywe150 reviews
All human! Bella is aspiring towards her dream job but when a family crisis hits her, she has to adapt. This means getting a job as a babysitter for a cute little kid. Except there's one little snag: the kid's brother, Edward Cullen. BxE R&R
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 24 - Words: 100,004 - Reviews: 3041 - Favs: 2,648 - Follows: 1,394 - Updated: 5/2/2009 - Published: 6/22/2008 - Complete
The Best Day by flamanipulator reviews
A Claire/Quil one-shot to the song "The Best Day" by Taylor Swift. A series of clips from Claire's life that follow pretty well with the song. song-fic, one-shot, blah blah.
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,431 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 1 - Published: 2/13/2009 - Claire, Quil Jr. - Complete
family sticks together by coli narago reviews
All Human. Bella and Emmett are siblings. Charlie abuses Bella, except for when Emmett is around. Emmett is a senior and Bella is a freshmen. Jasper and Rosalie are siblings, and they are their friends. Both of the Hales are seniors. No Edward or Alice.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort/Family - Chapters: 30 - Words: 17,984 - Reviews: 275 - Favs: 251 - Follows: 132 - Updated: 1/28/2009 - Published: 1/1/2009 - Bella, Emmett - Complete
Motherly Love by flamanipulator reviews
This is a story from Esme's POV. Seth has some family issues, and Esme is the main one to help out. Just a thing to give Esme some story time, and develop her 'mother hen' character. one-shot. NOT LOVEY-DOVEY!
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,707 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 4 - Published: 1/13/2009 - Esme, Seth - Complete
Hot Stuff by flamanipulator reviews
Benjamin and Tia tire of Amun's lifestyle, so they pay a visit to the Cullens. Set 70 years after BD. There is some action in here, and Benjamin gets to kick some butt. One-shot.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Supernatural/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,111 - Reviews: 7 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 2 - Published: 12/13/2008 - Benjamin - Complete
The Cullens Are Gone? Jacob's POV by flamanipulator reviews
Same as Bella's version, except in Jacob's POV.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 5 - Words: 11,587 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 19 - Follows: 4 - Published: 12/5/2008 - Jacob, Bella - Complete
Jacobs Story by Ellyasaur reviews
The story of Jacob Black.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Friendship/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,164 - Reviews: 20 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 11 - Published: 10/3/2008 - Jacob
Conversations by Rock'n'Slash reviews
8yr aft BD Alot like PhoneCalls Stupid, but funny, conversations that will make you laugh I didn't give up on phone calls though Includes: Control-your-thoughts-Jake-ness, let's-go-shopping-even-though-Bella-doesn't-want-to-ness and let's-wreak-havoc-ness
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,137 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 25 - Follows: 18 - Published: 9/30/2008
A World Without Sound by The Romanticidal Edwardian reviews
AU, BxE. My name is Bella Swan; good at sign language and karate. My best friend is deaf, and you know what? It doesn't matter. Won twice at Twilight Awards, and has been nominated more. Please review!
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 22 - Words: 105,849 - Reviews: 7809 - Favs: 9,740 - Follows: 2,783 - Updated: 9/27/2008 - Published: 6/1/2008 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Therapy by Rock'n'Slash reviews
This was writen by one of my crazy friends. She really needs therapy. ALYSSA IS A WEIRDO! XD
Twilight - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 641 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 2 - Published: 9/5/2008 - Complete
The Lion and the Lamb by Alphie reviews
A retelling of Twilight from Edward's point of view. Now on permanent hiatus. Please read author's note.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Romance/Supernatural - Chapters: 26 - Words: 112,769 - Reviews: 3241 - Favs: 2,997 - Follows: 1,790 - Updated: 1/12/2008 - Published: 2/14/2006
Things You Should Never Do by Sadness-is-Beautiful reviews
50 things you should never, ever, ever do, as demonstrated by the good people...and vampires...and werewolves...of Forks.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 8,852 - Reviews: 584 - Favs: 226 - Follows: 207 - Updated: 9/10/2007 - Published: 3/1/2007
Transformation by be my escape1 reviews
The story of the first time Jacob tramsformed into a werewolf.New sensations rippled through me. I shook with rage, but my skin felt like something insde me was tearing me apart. The sensation moved from my skin to my muscles and through my inner core.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,884 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 15 - Follows: 3 - Published: 6/30/2007 - Complete
Jacob's Note by be my escape1 reviews
This is Jacob's response to recieving Bella's Letter.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,018 - Reviews: 42 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 11 - Updated: 6/17/2007 - Published: 5/17/2007 - Complete
Twilight: A Love Spoof reviews
A collection of Edward and Bella's diary entries from when they break up to when they go slightly NUTS.
Twilight - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 2 - Words: 826 - Reviews: 4 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 7/21/2009 - Published: 7/20/2009 - Edward, Bella