If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile

If you want world peace, a brighter future, and more chocolate, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile.

93 percent of American teens would have a severe emotional breakdown if someone called them a freak. If you're a part of the 7 percent who would ask the person, "What was your first clue?", copy this into your profile and add your name to the list: Sunlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Moonlit Goddess of the C.O.C.A., Evil Genius of the COCA, Invader Miley Phantom, dAnnYsGiRl777, BloodySalvation, Lady Lost-A-Lot, bellabookworm9, Bella Masen Cullen, Vampire Scooby, Alannaswarrior, SpottedLilly, Alleyanna Cullen, hugs.4.all.the.emo.boyz, WritingRocks6, Bubble Blower, panache2005, .Dr1v3n t0 1n5aN1Ty., Serenity.Jones, crystalshake,japaneseanimelover03, kuroXnekoX,xXMiracleXx

Ninety-five percent of the kids out there are concerned with being popular and fitting in. If you're part of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list. AnimeKittyCafe, Hyperactivley Bored, Gem W, Bara-Minamino, Yavie Aelinel, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Shadow929, The Astrology Nerd, brown-eyed angelofmusic, piratesswriter/fairy to be, The Gypsy-Pirate Queen,xGabriellaxBoltonx, xEarlySunsetsOverMonroevillex, Smartest Girl In The World,'rEd RoSe-StArFiRe-RoSeFiRe', Zwergschnauzer, dablackfox101, mushroomcloudslooklikebroccoli, Really Really Long PenName Guy, xXAnimeKittenXx, Smallvillegirl2, Amuto-fan-Neko-san,xXMiracleXx

If all else fails, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Two wrongs don't make a right, but they make a good excuse.

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

The person who smiles when things go wrong has found someone to blame it on.

Better to stay silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt.

Never argue with an idiot. They'll just drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

I'd tell you to go to hell, but I work there and really don't want to see you everyday.

Normal people scare me...but not as much as I scare them.

Even if the voices aren't real, they have some good ideas.

Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.

Stupidity killed the cat. Curiosity was framed.

A wise man once said, "Ask a girl."

When in doubt, push random buttons!

Fighting is mind over matter. I don't mind, and you don't matter.

You wanna know why God created man before woman? Every masterpiece needs a rough draft!

There's always a light at the end of the tunnel. Of course, it's usually an oncoming express train.

There are three kinds of people. Those who learn by reading, a few who learn by observation, and the rest who have to test the electric fence for themselves.

They say guns don't kill people; people do. Well, I think guns help. I mean, if you just stood there and yelled 'BANG!' I don't think you'd kill many people...

Just when I think you've said the stupidest thing ever you just keep on talking.

You know, you do this annoying thing where you open your mouth and then these things you call words come out. Yeah like that. Stop it.

He who laughs last thinks slowest.

An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work.

They say hard work never hurts anybody, but why take the chance.

Why be difficult, when with just a little bit of effort, you can be impossible?

Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies.

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

A clear conscience is usually a sign of memory loss.

There are no stupid questions, just a lot of inquisitive idiots.

I'm not as dumb as you look.

The newscaster is the person who says "Good evening" and then tells you why it's not.

We live in an age where pizza gets to your house before the police.

If you don't like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk.

Sarcasm is one more service we offer.

Hate is just a special kind of love we give to people who suck.

I used to have super powers, but then my therapist took them away.

They say the truth will set you free. Then why is it every time I tell the truth, I get sent to my room?

Some people are like Slinky's. They seem to have no purpose, but they still bring you a smile when you push them down the stairs.

Keep smiling; it makes people wonder what you're up to.

Love your enemies. It gets them really confused.

Silence is golden but duct tape is silver.

It's ok to argue with two characters on your shoulders.

Writing isn't a career, it's more of a mental illness.

Anything thrown hard enough should hurt.

Curiosity killed the cat, satisfaction brought him back, but stupidity killed him again.

Flying is simple, you just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Some say the glass is half full, some say it's half empty, I say, "Are you gonna drink that?"

All people have the right to stupidity but some people abuse the privilege.

When I was born, I was so shocked that I didn't talk for a year and a half.

Where there's a will...I want to be in it.

Do not disturb, I'm disturbed already.

The trouble with life, is there's no background music.

A clean house is a sign of a broken computer!

Do not walk behind me for I may not lead, do not walk in front of me for I may not follow, do not walk beside me either. JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!

Don't piss me off, I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.

For people who like peace and quiet: Get me a CORDLESS PHONE!

I don't get even, I get odder.

If being an idiot hurt, then you would be in constant pain.

If I were any lazier, I would slip into a coma!

If life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Then throw it back at life and steal the oranges you asked for!

If life gives you lemons...throw them at someone.

If life gives you lemons, make beef stew.

When life gives you lemons, say "What else have you got?" you might get something else

In order to lose your mind, you have to have one in the first place.

I've learned from my mistakes, and I'm sure I could repeat them exactly.

Light travels faster than sound. That is why...some people seem bright until you hear them speak.

You have the right to remain silent, anything you say will be misquoted and used against you.

An optimist is someone who falls off the empire state building and after 50 floors says "So far so good!"

If Fed ex and UPS merge, they would be called Fed UP.

Never drink water...if it can rust iron, think of what it can do to your stomach.

Chaos, panic, pandemonium, my work here is done.

Scientists are complaining that the new Dinosaur movie shows dinosaurs with lemurs, who didn't evolve for another million years. They're afraid the movie will give kids a mistaken impression. What about the fact that the dinosaurs are singing and dancing?

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.

Your misery=My joy

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile

If you think that everything is much more fun in an english accent then copy and paste this on to your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever spent a long amount of time looking for something that you were holding/wearing, copy this to your profile and add your name: Unique girl - YAYZ, Fast Talking Dolphin, Amuto-fan-Neko-san, kuroXnekoX,xXMiracleXx

If you've ever been standing up perfectly straight and fallen flat on your face paste this onto your profile.

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this in your profile.

If you and/or your best friend is insane, copy and paste this into your profile

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.

If you think being unique is cooler than being cool copy this into your profile

If you met your near twin (In resemblance,personality,or both) copy this into your profile.

If you know someone who should be hit by a train, and you'd be laughing, copy and paste.

If you have ever looked at something that wasn't there when somebody said "Look its _", copy onto profile

If your near twin is your best friend, copy and paste this into your profile.

If there are times when you want to annoy people just for the hell of it, copy this into your profile

If you have ever tried to lick your elbow for more than 5 minutes, copy this into your profile

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile.

A friend will walk into your house without ringing the doorbell or knocking, a best friend will walk in and yell,"I'm home!"
A friend will call your parents by their first names, a best friend will call them Mom and Dad.
A friend will tell you that your a great singer even if you're terrible, a best friend will tell you that you suck.
A friend will give you a shoulder to cry on when he breaks your heart, a best friend will go up to him and say, "It's because you're gay, isn't it?"

A friend helps you up when you fall. A best friend continues walking while saying, "Walk much dumb ass?"
A friend gives you their umbrella in the rain. A best friend takes yours and says, "RUN, -BEEP- RUN!"
A friend will visit you in jail. A good friend will bail you out of jail. A best friend would be in the room next to you saying, "THAT WAS FREAKING AWESOME'!!
A friend will always be like "well you deserve better". A best friends will be prank calling him saying "you will die in seven days

Some say the glass is half full, others the glass is half empty, all I want to know is who's drinking my water!

REMEMBER WHEN ..
getting HiGH meant swinging at a playground?
the worst thing you could get from a boy was c0otiEs?
when )m 0 m( was your hero
and D a D was the boy you were gonna marry?
when your W0RST ENEMiES were your siblings
and rAcE iSsuEs were about who ran fastest?
when - WAR- was a card game
and life was simple and care free?
remember when all you wanted to do
WAS GROW UP?

Put This In Your Profile If You're Still 5 Inside...No Matter How Old You Are Now

Friends

FRIENDS: Lend you their umbrella
BEST FRIENDS: Take yours and say 'RUN BITCH RUN!'

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "THAT WAS FRICKING AWSOME"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
BEST FRIENDS: Loses your crap and tells you, "My bad...here's a tissue."

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will comfort you when the guy rejects you
BEST FRIENDS: Will go up to him and say 'its because your gay isn't it?'

FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter
BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this crappp!!

16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme song.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"

Repost this if you laughed... Or are planning to do any of these things

pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, DIED, or is living with cancer.

If you ever thought you lost something when you were either holding it or it was in your pocket, copy and paste this into you profile.

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree.
The boys dont want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, the one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree

98 percent of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy and paste this in your profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

92 percent of American teens would die if Abercombie and Fitch told them it was uncool to breathe. Copy this in your profile if you would be the 8 percent that would be laughing your asses off.

If you think those kids should just give the Rabbit his cereal and be done with it, copy and paste this in your profile.

If at one time you misspelled or forgot how to spell a word less than four letters...
If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it...
If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention...
If you've ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP sign...
If you've ever walked into a wall before...
Then copy these to your profile and don't lie about it anymore.

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or vice versa copy this into your profile

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.
If you and your friends have a nickname, title, or anything else for each other, copy and paste this in your profile.
If you don't watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud or it, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have a very wide range of interests, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are odd and proud of it put this on your profile.

SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!! If you are really random put this on your profile.
If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever fallen up the stairs copy this into your profile.
I like cheese. I have seen purple cows. If two gooses are geese, then why aren't two moose meese, or when two foots are feet, why aren't two footballs feetball? Milk tastes CRAPPY. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!
If you've ever tried to lick your elbow and knew that it was physically impossible, copy this to your profile.
If you ever wondered who the HELL came up with the idea of bending in front of a cow and squeezing the flappy pink things under it to see if something comes out and DRINKING whatever crap comes out, copy and paste this to your profile!
If you've ever busted a move/burst into song randomly, copy/paste this into your profile.
If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!
If you have ever tripped where there is a WATCH YOUR STEP SIGN, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you and your friend break out into song in a public area put this on your profile.
If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.
If you've ever read started to read a chapter in a fanfiction, got side-tracked, and forgot to review and realized it after the author posted another chapter, copy and paste this on your profile.
If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.
If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile.
If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you're one of those people who get excited when you see just two reviews, paste this into your profile.
Pluto was no longer declared a planet on August 27 of 2006 just because it was 'too small' and 'off its orbit' for a couple scientists likings. If you still think Pluto should be a planet then copy and paste this to your profile. LONG LIVE PLUTO
If you think the people who don't do copy/pastes are just too damn lazy, copy and paste this to your profile!
Too many people have smoked marijuana. If you haven't, put this in your profile.
Too many people are on crack. If you're not, add this to your bio.
If you like to read people's profiles when you're bored, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you are obsessed with anime, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you sigh at the fact that because your profile is so long there is little chance someone would actually take the time and read it, copy and paste this onto your profile.
If you've ever laughed during something sad and depressing and ruined a moment, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile
If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever been tempted to kick someone in the nuts, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever started laughing uncontrollably, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you have ever tripped over your own feet, copy this into your profile.
If you think that all problems can be solved with a flamethrower, copy and paste this into your profile.
If you're against animal cruelty (horse slaughter, bear bating, dolphin hunting, chimp slavery etc.) then copy this into your profile!

This is a true story. A girl died in 1933. A man barried her while she was still alive. The murder chanted, "Toma Sota balcu," as he buried her. Now that you read this chant, you will meet this little girl. In the middle of the night she will be on your ceiling. She will suffocate you like she was suffocated. If you post this on your profile, she will not bother you. Your kindness will be rewarded. Lucillia