Dreamer with a Song
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Joined 12-16-12, id: 4420251, Profile Updated: 12-16-12

ABOUT ME:

Hey! I'm Natalie and I live in Singapore. I'm a girl.

Favourite Animals: Cats, Lions, Snakes.

Hobbies: Singing, Reading, Sleeping, Writing

Favourite colour: Teal

Favourite music: Taylor Swift, The Script,

Favourite Books: Harry Potter, A Song of Ice and Fire/Game of Thrones, The Mysterious Benedict Society, The Hunger Games, The Night Circus.

Favourite genre: Romance. And comedy. I mostly read stuff like Drarry and Jily and EverArk

Favourite Movie/TV programme: The Harry Potter series, The Avengers, Thor, Tangled, The Lord of the Rings, Star Wars.

Favourite Actors/ Actresses

Tom Hiddleston (Thor/Avengers/ Midnight in Paris)

Tom Felton (Harry Potter)

Emma Watson (Harry Potter)

Chris Hemsworth (Thor/Avengers)

Jeniffer Lawrence (The Hunger Games)

NOW IT'S COPY AND PASTE AND RANDOM STUFF TIME

If you have ever had a crush on a book character, copy this to your profile.

If you call book characters "Cute" even though you've never actually seen them, copy this to your profile.

You are nine months old at birth, which makes you really be one year old three months later, making you one year older than you really are.

95 of people would panic if the Jonas brothers stood on the roof of a 3 story building and said they were about to jump. If you are one of the 5 who who get all of your friends, some popcorn, and a soda and scream "JUMP! JUMP! JUMP!" copy this.

If you've ever had a dream and forgotten what it was about before the dream even ended, copy and paste

Many writers don't know the difference between 'your' and 'you're.' If you happen to understand this mundanely ridiculous fact, copy and paste this into your profile

If you like chocolate, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever wished you could talk to animals, paste this into your profile.

If you are against animal cruelty then copy this into your profile!

Stuff to do on an elevator that WILL help your image, as in, your CRAZY image

1. Crack open your briefcase or handbag, peer inside, and ask, "Got enough air in there?"

2. Stand silent and motionless in one corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to open the doors, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open by themselves.

4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them all to call you Admiral.

5. Meow occasionally.

6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" and back away slowly.

7. Say "DING!" at every floor.

8. Say "I wonder what all these do?" and push all the red buttons.

9. Make explosion noises whenever someone else pushes a button.

10. Stare grinning at another person for a while, then say, "I have new socks on."

11. When the elevator is silent, look around and ask, "Is that your beeper?"

12. Try to make personal calls on the emergency phone.

13. Draw a little square with chalk on the floor then say to the other passengers, "This is my personal space."

14. When there's only one other person on the elevator, tap them on the shoulder then pretend it wasn't you.

15. As you are coming to the end of the journey, get emotional and have a group hug with the other passengers. Tell them that you will never forget them.

16. Ask if you can push the buttons for other people, but push the wrong ones.

17. Hold the doors open and say that you're waiting for a friend. After a while, let the doors close and say, "Hi, Greg. How's your day been?"

18. Drop a pen and wait until someone bends to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"

19. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the lift.

20. Pretend that you're a flight attendant, and review emergency exits with the other passengers.

21. Swat at flies that don't exist.

22. Yell, "Group hug!", then enforce it.

23. Make race car noises when someone gets on or off.

24. Congradulate all for being in the same lift as you.

25. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, "Shut up, all of you just shup UP!"

26. Walk in with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.

27. While the doors are opening, hurriedly whisper, "Hide it...quick!", then whistle innocently.

28. Let your cell phone ring--don't answer it.

29. Walk into the lift and say, "This reminds me of being buried alive. Ah, those were the days..."

30. Take shoes off before entering. Then look shocked and disgusted when others don't.

31. Ask people which floor they want, then say, "Is that your final answer?"

32. Also in your bellboy act, ask people what floor they want. Whenever they answer, give them a glare and say, "You should be ashamed of yourself!"

33. Ask loudly, "Did you feel that?"

34. Tell different people that you can see their aura.

35. When the door closes, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."

36. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."

37. Dress up in a long black cloak with a hood, stare at everyone, and in a deep voice announce: "It is time..."

38. Say your Majesty when anybody gets on.

39. Introduce yourself as Lord Voldemort.

40. Ask people which floor they want and why, and then announce that you're going to the floor with Olympus on it because you didn't steal any lightening.

41. Hang Ethan Hunt style from the ceiling of the elevator and speak ominously when someone enters "Heloooooooo"

42. Still hanging from the ceiling, drop onto whoever comes in.

43. Try to make up and sing lyrics for the boring elevator music.

44. Try to start a My-Briefcase-is-better-than-yours contest.

45. Hold a ring and say, "My precious"

"I'm going to KILL you until you DIE from it!"

How do you mow the lawn somewhere that says asks you to keep off the grass?

At Niagra Falls you'll find a sign, just under the waterfall, that says "No smoking." What's up?

Why is the operator the only person who gets to keep his same phone-number no matter where he lives?

There's a special school for talented people, why isn't there a special school for stupid people?

There WERE two snowflakes that looked exactly alike, I saw them last Winter but I can't prove it because now it's Summer.

If you HATE Hannah Mon-upisstay-tanna, post this

Why is it considered necessary to naildown the lid of a coffin?

Why don't we ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why dosen't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

If a person with multiple personalities theatens suicide, is that consisdered a hostage situation?

If a cow laughed would milk come out of her nose?

So what's the speed of dark?

How come abbreviated is such a long word?

Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why people appear bright until you hear them speak?

Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?

How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?

Why does the word Filipino start with letter "F"?

MORE stuff for you to know

The most money ever paid for a cow at an auction was 1.3 million.

Your hair keeps growing for a few months after you die.

Monday is the most-used day that people commit suicide.

In the average life-time, people will have walked the equivalent of 5 times around the equator.

Odontophobia
is the fear of teeth.

The little plastic things on the end of shoelaces are called aglets.

It is impossible to lick your elbow.

75% of people who read that tried to lick their elbow, and you are now smiling because that's exactly what you did.

Mel Blanc (voice of Bugs Bunny) was allergic to carrots.

Each day more money is printed for Monopoly than the U.S. Treasury

The United States has never lost a where they used mules.

On average, there are about 178 sesame seeds on a McDonalds BigMac bun.

The word "lethologica" describes the state when you can't remember the word you want to use.

Some weird dogs laws are that in Ohio, the police are allowed to bite their police-dogs to get them quiet.

A dime has exactly 118 ridges around it's edge.

/l、
(゚、 。 7
l、 ヽ
じしf,)ノ

Yaaaay kitty!

This is Kitty. Copy and paste Kitty into your
profile to help him gain world domination.

16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART

1. Get 24 packets of gum and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking..

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone,
" 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask,
"Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. In the auto department, start dancing to the music coming from the sound systems that are on sale.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream..
"NO! NO! It's those voices again!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "Pikachu, I choose you!"

HEY GUESS WHAT! I'm like DEAD and stuff! If you're also dead but can't pull in your dirt copy this!

1. YOUR REAL NAME:

Natalie

2. YOUR GANGSTA NAME: (first 4 letters of real name izzle)

Nataizzle

3. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color and favorite animal)

Teal Cat

4. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (your middle name and the street you live on)

Ciara Kew

5. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name)

Limna

6. YOUR SUPERHERO NAME: (Your 2nd favorite color, and favorite soda)

Turquoise Sprite

7. YOUR IRAQI NAME: (2nd letter of your first name, 3rd letter of your last name, any letter of your middle name, 2nd letter of your mom's maiden name, 3rd letter of dad's middle name, 1st letter of a sibling's first name, and last letter of your mom's middle name)

AMCIOJE

8. YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION NAME: (both parents' middle names)

Beatrice Dan

9. YOUR GOTH NAME: (Black and the name of one of your pets)

Black Amber

10. Your cow name: (put the first 4 letters of your name in, then moo)

Natamoo

11. Your parrot name: (put the first 2 letters of your name in, then birdy)

Nabirdy

12. Your fake name: (put the last 3 letters of your last name in, the closest letter of the middle of your middle name, then the first 2 letters of your first name in)

LIMANA

13. Your poptropica name: (put your favorite color in, then your favorite thing in outerspace that you can see at night)

Teal Canis Major

14. Your Pokemon name (Your favorite color then your month of birth . color first name month last name.)

Teal May

15. Your seriously weird sounding name: (OKAY! The first 2 letters of your favorite band, then your favorite song by them, then the last 3 letters of your moms old last name, then the last 3 letters of your 2nd favorite band's song that you like the least, Then a cleaner name you think sounds sooooooo wrong, then your favorite bands song you least like, then lastly, a website you think is stupid.WHEW!!)

Cofixyoulimamebacenomyspace

Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. Then you'll be a mile away from them and you'll have their shoes.

Flying is not dangerous. Crashing is dangerous.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you.

A tree only hits an automobile in self-defence.

If your parents never had children, chances are you won't either.

When your life shatters into a million pieces, pick up the pieces, grab some glue, and make a new one.

As Long As There Are Tests, There Will Be Prayer In Public Schools

Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird.

A wise man once said, "I don't know - go ask a woman.

A good friend will keep you secrets when you ask them too. A true friend will keep their mouths shut without you asking them.

When life gives you lemons make grape juice. Then sit back and let the world wonder how the heck you did it.

If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?

Help I've fallen and I can't...hey, nice carpet

Some people are like slinkies. The seem to have no purpose, but they still bring you a smile when you push them down the stairs.

Don't fall for someone unless they are willing to catch you.

Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.

There are four things you cannot recover in life: The stone after it is thrown, the word after it is said, the occasion after it is missed, and time after it is gone.

Learn from yesterday. Live for today. Hope for tomorrow.

Living your life is more important than making a living.

I'm SKINNY, so I MUST be anorexic.

I'm EMO, so I MUST cut my wrists
I'm a NEGRO, so I MUST carry a gun.
I'm BLONDE, so I MUST be a ditz
I'm JAMAICAN, so I MUST smoke weed.
I'm HAITIAN, so I MUST eat cat.
I'm ASIAN, so I MUST be sexy.
I'm JEWISH, so I MUST be greedy.
I'm GAY, so I MUST have AIDS.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST have a sex-tape.
I'm ARAB, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I SPEAK MY MIND, so I MUST be a bitch.
I'm a GAY RIGHTS SUPPORTER, so I WILL go to hell

I'm a CHRISTAN, so I MUST think gay people should go to hell.
I'm RELIGIOUS, so I MUST shove my beliefs down your throat.
I'm ATHEIST, so I MUST hate the world.
I don't have a RELIGION, so I MUST be evil and have no morals.
I'm REPUBLICAN, so I MUST not care about poor people.
I'm DEMOCRAT, so I MUST not believe in being responsible.
I am LIBERAL, so I MUST be gay.
I'm SOUTHERN, so I MUST be white trash.
I TAKE ANTI-DEPRESSANTS, so I MUST be crazy.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST only want to get into your pants.
I'm IRISH, so I MUST have a bad drinking problem.
I'm INDIAN, so I MUST own a convenient store.
I'm NATIVE AMERICAN, so I MUST dance around a fire screaming like a savage.
I'm a CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be a whore...
I'm a DANCER, So I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore
I wear SKIRTS a lot, so I MUST be a slut.
I'm a PUNK, so I MUST do drugs.

I'm RICH, so I MUST be a conceited snob.
I WEAR BLACK, so I MUST be a goth or emo.
I'm a WHITE GIRL, so I MUST be a nagging, steal-your-money kind of girlfriend
I'm NOT A VIRGIN, so I MUST be easy.
I FELL IN LOVE WITH A MARRIED MAN, so I MUST be a home-wrecking whore.
I'm a TEENAGE MOM, so I MUST be an irresponsible slut.
I'm POLISH, so I MUST wear my socks with my sandals
I'm ITALIAN, so I must have a "big one".
I'm EGYPTIAN, so I must be a TERRORIST!
I'm PRETTY, so I MUST not be a virgin.
I HAVE STRAIGHT A'S, so I MUST have no social life.
I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS, so I MUST be looking for attention.
I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.
I'm a VEGETARIAN, so I MUST be a crazy political activist.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GUY FRIENDS, so I MUST be fucking them all.
I HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLS WHO ARE FRIENDS, so I MUST be a player.
I have BIG BOOBS, so I MUST be a hoe.
I'm COLOMBIAN, so I MUST be a drug dealer.
I WEAR WHAT I WANT, so I MUST be a poser.
I'm RUSSIAN, so I MUST be cool and that’s how Russians roll.
I'm GERMAN, so I MUST be a Nazi.
I hang out with GAYS, so I must be GAY TOO.
I'm BRAZILIAN, so I MUST have a BIG BUTT.
I'm PUERTO RICAN, so I MUST look good and be conceited
I'm SALVADORIAN, so I MUST be in MS 13
I'm POLISH, so I MUST be greedy
I'm HAWAIIAN, so I MUST be lazy
I'm PERUVIAN, so I MUST like llamas
I’m a STONER, so I MUST be VIRGIN so I MUST going in the wrong direction.
I’m STRAIGHT EDGE, so I must be violent
I'm a FEMALE GAMER, so I MUST be ugly.. or crazy.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST love fried chicken and kool-aid.
I'm a GIRL who actually EATS LUNCH, so I MUST be fat.
I'm SINGLE, so I MUST be ugly.
I'm a SKATER, so I must do weed and steal stuff
I'm a PUNK so I must only wear black and date only other punks.
I'm ASIAN, so I must be a NERD that does HOMEWORK 24/7
I'm CHRISTIAN, so I MUST hate homosexuals.
I'm MIXED, so I must be screwed up.
I'm MUSLIM, so I MUST be a terrorist.
I'm in BAND, so I MUST be a dork.
I'm BLACK, so I MUST believe JESUS WUZ A BROTHA.
I'm MORMON, so I MUST be perfect
I'm WHITE and have black friends so I MUST think I'm black.
I'm GOTH, so I MUST worship the devil.
I'm HISPANIC, so I MUST be dirty.
I'm NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, so I MUST be a loser.
I'm OVERWEIGHT, so I MUST have a problem with self control.
I'm PREPPY, so I MUST shun those who don't wear Abercrombie & Hollister.
I'm on a DANCE team, so I must be stupid, stuck up, and a whore.
I'm YOUNG, so I MUST be naive.
I'm MEXICAN, so I MUST have hopped the border.

I'm BLACK, so I MUST love watermelon.
I'm BI, so I MUST think every person I see is hot.
I'm an ASIAN GUY, so I MUST have a small penis.
I'm a GUY CHEERLEADER, so I MUST be gay.
I'm a PREP, so I MUST be rich.
I don't like the SUN, so I MUST be an albino.
I have a lot of FRIENDS, so I MUST love to drink and party.
I wear tight PANTS and I'm a guy, so I MUST be emo.
I couldn't hurt a FLY, So I MUST be a pussy.
I support GAY RIGHTS, so I MUST fit in with everyone.
I hang out with teenage drinkers and smokers, so I MUST smoke and drink too.
I have ARTISTIC TALENT, so I MUST think little of those who don't.
I don't like to be in a BIG GROUP, so I MUST be anti-social.
I have a DIFFERENT sense of HUMOR, so I MUST be crazy.
I tell people OFF, so I MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets GREASY a lot, so I MUST have no hygiene skills.
I'm DEFENSIVE, so I MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I'm a NUDIST, so I MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read Comics, so I MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a FORMER PROSTITUTE, So I MUST be a whore myself.
I'm TEXAN so I MUST ride a horse.
I’m a GOTH, so I MUST be a Satanist.
I’m a CROSSDRESSER, so I must be homosexual.
I draw ANIME, so I MUST be a freak
I am a FANGIRL, so I MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I WATCH PORN, so I MUST be perverted.
I'm INTELLIGENT, so I MUST be weak.
I am AMERICAN, so I MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I'm WELSH, so I MUST love sheep
I’m a YOUNG WRITER, so I MUST be emo.
I’m CANADIAN, so I MUST talk with a funny accent.
I'm a GUY, so I MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I'm CANADIAN, so I MUST love hockey and beavers.
I'm DISABLED, so I MUST be on Welfare.
I'm a FEMINIST, so I MUST have a problem with sexuality and I want to castrate every man on the earth.
I'm a TEENAGER, so I MUST have a STEREOTYPE.
I WEAR A BIG SUNHAT when I go outside, so I MUST be stupid.
I like BLOOD, so I must be a VAMPIRE.
I'm an ALBINO, so I MUST be an evil person with mental abilities that is A MURDERER!
I'm ENGLISH, so I MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m WHITE, so I MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
I don't like YAOI or YURI, so I must be HOMOPHOBIC.
I’m not the most POPULAR person in school, so I MUST be a loser.
I care about the ENVIRONMENT, I MUST be a tree hugging hippy
I have a FAN CHARACTER, so I MUST be an annoying Mary-sue.
I CHAT, so I MUST be having cyber sex.
I'm PAGAN, so I MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins.
I'm PAGAN, so I MUST worship Satan.
I'm CONSERVATIVE, so I MUST be against Abortion.
I'm SWEDISH, so I MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian.
I'm a LESBIAN, so I MUST want to get with every single girl that I see.
I like CARTOONS, so I MUST be IRRESPONSIBLE.
I like READING, so I MUST be a LONER.
I have my OWN spiritual ideology; therefore I MUST be WRONG or MISGUIDED.
I am WICCAN, so I MUST be a SATANIST.
I DISAGREE with my government, so I MUST be a TERRORIST.

I love YAOI, so I MUST be GAY.
I'm a PERSON, so I MUST be LABELED.
I DON'T CURSE, so I MUST be an outcast.
I like GAMES, ANIME and COMICS, so I MUST be childish.
I'm SWEDISH, therefore I MUST be WHITE.
I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I'm GOTHIC, so I MUST be mean.
I’m STRONG, so I MUST be stupid.
I'm AUSTRAILIAN, so I MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroos.
I go to RENFAIRES, so I MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times.
I’m GAY, so I’m after EVERY straight guy around.
I don’t want a BOYFRIEND, so I MUST be Lesbian.

I'm NOT CHRISTIAN, so I MUST just need converting.
I like marching band, so I MUST be a friendless freak.
I DRINK AND SMOKE, so I MUST have no life.
I am friends with a CUTTER, so I MUST be a CUTTER too.
I cry easily, so I MUST be a wimp.
I can't help pointing out mistakes, so I MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I'm a PERFECTIONIST, so I MUST check everything ten times, them burst into tears at one mistake.

I DON’T LIKE to talk about my personal life, so I MUST be having problems.

Your Guy Side:

You love hoodies
You love jeans.
Dogs are better than cats.
It's hilarious when people get hurt.
You've played with/against boys on a team.
Shopping is torture.
Sad movies suck.
You own/ed an X-Box.
Played with Hotwheel cars as a kid.
At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
You own/ed a DS, PS2 or Sega.
You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
You watch sports on TV.

You love video games.
Guitar Hero/Rock Band rule!
Gory movies are cool.
You go to your dad for advice.
You own like a trillion baseball caps.
You like going to high school football games.
You used to/do collect football/baseball cards.
Baggy pants are cool to wear.
It's kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
Sports are fun.
Talk with food in your mouth.
Sleep with your socks on at night.

YOUR GIRL SIDE:

You wear lip gloss/stick.

You love to shop.

You wear eyeliner.

You wear the color pink.
Go to your mom for advice.
You consider cheerleading a sport.
You hate wearing the color black.
Video games are boring.
Rock Band/Guitar Hero are a waste of time.
You like hanging out at the mall.
You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
You like wearing jewelry.
Skirts are a big part of your wardrobe.
Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
You don't like the movie Star Wars.
You were in gymnastics/dance.
It takes you around/ more one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up.
You smile a lot more than you should.
You care about what you look like.
You like wearing dresses when you can.
You like wearing body spray/perfume/cologne.
You love the movies.
Used to play with dolls as little kid.
Like putting make-up on someone else for the heck of it.
Like being the star of every thing

ACTUAL PRODUCT LABELS THAT SCARE ME:

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Fritos! ..You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special)?

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how?...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought?...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and.. .I'm taking this because?...)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands." (...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Ways to Annoy people at the cinema:

Throw popcorn in the air and yell, "It's snowing!"

Go, "Oooooh..." whenever anyone kisses.

Clap when the good guy gets killed.

During the previews, yell, "Can you fast-forward it?"

Whenever the bad guy is doing something devious, say, "Watch out!"

Laugh very loudly at all the corny jokes.

Tell the man selling popcorn that the bathroom is flooding.

Yell out what is going to happen.

Wear a cape and when its your turn to get popcorn yell, "I'm Batman! Hahaha!" and run away.

Say that they cannot sit next to you because you invisible friend already is.

Dress for every movie as if it were the Rocky Horror Picture Show.

Use empty chairs next to you as catapults with candy. Aim at specific people behind you and see if you can hit anyone in the back row.

Wear 3D glasses. Complain loudly how bad the effects are.

Bring a flashlight. In the middle of the film do shadow puppets on the ceiling.

Bring a remote control. Complain that you can't change the channel.

Sit front row, the minute the movie starts run out screaming.

Every time a character's name is mentioned do the Richmeister. (for a guy named Nick say, the Nickmeister, the Nickenator, Nickarino...)

Bring a beach ball. Toss it around.

Try to start a wave.

Become a bookie. Take bets on who will die first.

Sit in the back and throw eggs at the projection window.

Every time someone curses cover your ears and scream, "No profanity!"

Sing with the theme music.

Bring and use your own air freshener.

At the ticket booth, request tickets for really old movies, "I'll have two tickets for the Goonies."

Throw spit wads on the screen. Try throwing them on the upper part of the screen so they can't get scraped off.

Pass around a collection plate and see if anyone contributes.

Point a laser pointer at the screen. Give the audience a laser light show.

Bring a book and a bright light. Start reading the book with the light on. When someone asks you to turn out the light, yell, "Shh, I'm trying to read!"

Use binoculars. Stare at the audience rather than the movie.

Bring a Nintendo laser gun. Shoot at the screen.

Clap loudly every time a person walks into the theater late.

When someone kicks the back of your chair, scream, "Ahhh, whiplash!"

Ask what the theater's return policy on popcorn is.

Ask the person at the ticket window, "Do you work here?"

Start a standing ovation at the end of the movie.

Quote all dialogue 4 seconds after it is said on the screen.

Get up frequently and leave the room while singing "Let's all go to the Lobby to get ourselves a treat"

Every time there is a gun shot scream, "Hit the floor!", jump on the floor, and cover your head.

Wear one of those "cat in the hat" top hats.

Play musical chairs, getting up frequently and moving right next to someone sitting by themself.

Bring your own beanbag chair and sit in the aisle.

Before the movie begins, tape fart cushions to various chairs in the theater room.

Bring a portable air popper, pop your own popcorn.

Bring a watergun and shoot it at anyone who begins talking then say very loudly, "SHH!"

Before the commercials start and people are just coming in and shout so that people outside can hear, "I'M SO VERY SORRY! YOU'RE TOO LATE!"

Tie a cardboard box around your waist and walk up and down the aisles shouting "Get your popcorn, peanuts!"

Cough really loudly right at the most important part of the movie, so nobody can here it, like when the killer's name is going to be said.

Laugh hysterically during the sad parts in the movie, cry during the funny ones.

Bring a pager or cellphone and set them off every 5 minutes, you can also set off a watch alarm if you have a loud one.

Say "Shhhhh" every 5 minutes.

Pass by a room that's showing a movie you've already seen, put your head into the room, and scream the end

There are so many people who have never been to see a musical or play, and so many high and middle schools who focus more on sports than the Arts. If we didn't have arts then their would be no TV, because we wouldn't have actors, and no TV means no movies. Theater, Dance, Band, Acting, Singing, and the rest of the Arts are a important part of our community too! Support the Arts! If you agree that the Arts should be supported and appreciated just as much as sports are then add your name to the end of this and post it on your profile, please. Thank you! / Theater Geek / Lara The Dark Angel / MoonlightSpirit / MySuperManJoeDJDangaa / Thranduils.Heart.And.Soul / Arya Daeriel/ Dreamer with a Song

If your a FanFiction addict, copy this to your profile.

If your a computer addict, copy this to your profile.

If you've ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile.

If you ever write FanFictions when you should be doing homework, paying attention in class, etc., put this on your profile!!

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you are so cool that you actually read through all of these, copy this into your profile!!

If you have ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy this onto your profile.

Heaven doesn't want me, and Hell is afraid I'll take over.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: danyan, Zutara Lover, Black'n'red'Butterfly, Enrica, twilightgirl1918, Just A Little Bit Dramatic, Pirates OWNS you, Cripsee, I'll have some stupid cliche, Insane Winged Girl, Faxness-Fan48, An-Jelly-Ca,VMsuperfan, SVUlover, daisy617, Jammylmd. Musiclvr320, F29DWNxluverx4, oxlovelyxo, xoxojonasbrothersluva101xoxo, mamaXUnicorn, liveindreamland1- MySupermanJoeDJDangaa, Thranduils.Heart.And.Soul., Arya Daeriel, Dreamer with a Song

Ninety-five percent of teenagers are concerned about being popular. If you are one of the five percent who aren't, copy this, put it in your profile, and add your name to the list: Queen S of Randomness 016, Queen B of Randomness 016, AnimeKittyCaffe, The Gypsy Pirate Queen, That Bloody Demon, The Astrology Nerd, Shadow929, Crazy Billie Joe Loving Freak, Yavie Aelienel, Hyperactively Bored, Spymaster E, Shanny-Boo, Gem W, Brown-eyed angelofmusic, pirateswriter/fairy to be, Bara-Minomoto, Em Quagmire, Buffy The Mary-Sue Slayer, Random Little Writer, SamanthaFantasyFan, EdwardAddict, Supergirrl, Elemental-ANimal, Mother Nature's Daughter, Nazgul Queen, Admiral Norrington, iamanundeadmonkey, LoveSquaredTichan, icestar14, ServantofSauron, Thranduils.Heart.And.Soul, Arya Daeriel, Dreamer with a Song

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

95% OF TEENS WOULD SCREAM AND CRY IF THEY SAW ZAC EFRON AND THE JONAS BROTHERS ABOUT TO JUMP OF THE TOP OF A SKYSCRAPER. COPY AND PUT THIS ON YOUR PROFILE IF YOU'RE PART OF THE 5% THAT WOULD SIT THERE WITH A BUCKET OF POPCORN AND SCREAM "DO A FLIP!"

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both...copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy this on your profile.

If you are in lala land most of the time copy this onto your profile

If you believe in doing what you love, no matter what other people might think, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you wish that a fictional character was real, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you're a person who is longing for an adventure like the ones you read in books, copy and paste this to your profile.

If songs get stuck in your head so constantly that you know the words them copy and paste this to your profile.

If you like chocolate as much as I do, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever been called a bookworm and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this into your profile

If you ever forgotten what you were talking about in a conversation copy and paste this into your profile

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, add this to your profile

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile

If you easily finish one novel a day, copy this onto your profile.

If you think that writing Fanfic stories is fun then copy this onto your profile!

You are a writer IF...

-If you talk to yourself. (Alll the time...Shakes head sadly)
-If
you talk to yourself about talking to yourself (i.e. ‘I wonder why I talk to myself so much?’) (All the time again...)
-If,
when you talk to yourself, you sometimes speak as if talking to another person (i.e. ‘Okay, so you're telling me that, if all the dustmites in two square feet were to suddenly tackle glomp each other they'd become visible?’)
-If,
after uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand in awe and say, ‘Wow, this is good stuff for sugar highs!’
-If
you live off of sugar and caffeine.
-If
people start to notice that you tend to check your e-mail every day for a week, then suddenly disappear off the face of the planet.
-If
your e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.
-If,
when replying to someone else’s e-mail, you are sometimes so random that you fail to address the original message altogether.
-If,
you tend to collect every rock you can find, to the point that it ANNOYS everyone, even your own mother and other peoples' mother.
-If,
no matter where you are in your room, you never have to so much as get up to reach a pen/pencil and paper.
-If, t
he letters are starting to wear off on the keys of your keyboard.
-If
people think you might have O.C.D.
-If
you think it’d be cool to have O.C.D.
-If
you start constantly talking in third person, past tense.
-If
you think about making lists like this, and start giggling for no ‘apparent’ reason.
-If
your friends don’t even bother to look funny at you anymore when you start giggling for no apparent reason.
-And
finally, the number one way to tell if you’re a good writer: If you failed English

If you always have more than one tab open when on the computer, copy and paste

If you've ever wondered how long a profile can be, copy and paste

131 Ways to Agitate Someone Who Doesn't Like Harry Potter
Guaranteed to tick them off!
1. Relate everything they say to the Harry Potter books and/or movies.

2. Say they look like a Harry Potter character of the opposite gender.

3. Quote Dobby.

4. Hog the computer 24/7 while logged onto MuggleNet.

5. Read out loud to them whenever they can't get away from you (Example: When in a car or an elevator). If you don't have a book with you, recite from memory.

6. Give them Harry Potter merchandise for their birthday and Christmas and demand that they keep it and treasure it forever.

7. Rewrite their favorite song with Harry Potter lyrics and sing it constantly.

8. Crowd their inbox with Harry Potter related e-mail and make sure the subjects are misleading.

9. Start singing a Sorting Hat song at random moments, pretend to forget what comes next, and ask if they know in a very loud voice.

10. Make them play Quidditch with you.

11. Give all of their friends Harry Potter related nicknames and act mortally offended when they don't know the history of their character.

12. Change your name to that of a Harry Potter character and start screaming when they don't address you as such in public.

13. Always speak with a British accent - especially if you aren't from the UK.

14. Refer to real places by Harry Potter names.

15. ...throw a fit if others don't use these names.

16. Draw round glasses and lightning bolt scars on every poster and picture you come across...in permanent marker.

17. Give long lectures about how the prophecy relates to every day life.

18. Give every room in your house a Harry Potter codename. ( Example: The living room becomes the Entrance Hall) and whenever someone asks you where something is, use these names.

19. Change them immediately if they figure out what the names refer to.

20. Constantly ask if they can see the thestrals too.

21. ...refuse to explain what a thestral is.

22. Say, "Anything off the trolley, dear?" in a fake British accent when offering anyone food.

23. Pretend you can do magic.

24. Constantly rearrange their furniture and blame it on indecisive house-elves.

25. Yell "Get away from me, Death Eater!" whenever they get near you.

26. Constantly compare them to Mrs. Figg.

27. ...laugh evilly if they ask who Mrs. Figg is.

28. Complain loudly about how your pictures don't move.

29. Whenever you're asked for advice, reply with "Three turns should do it" in a very serious voice.

30. Break any awkward silences by saying, "How 'bout them Chudley Cannons?"

31. Tell a very long joke using a random Harry Potter quote as the punchline and then laugh hysterically.

32. ...make sure the joke isn't funny.

33. Use the titles "You-Know-Who" and "He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named" to refer to random people.

34. ... make sure no one knows who you're talking about.

35. Write letters to people (friends, neighbors...politicians) and ask them to join S.P.E.W.

36. ...hand fliers advertising it to random passerby.

37. Report Dumbledore's death to your local authorities.

38. Call them repeatedly asking if Percy Weasley is there and hang up before they can reply.

39. Pop up in place you're not supposed to be and insist that you were only trying to Apparate.

40. If you're late for something, blame it on your broken Time Turner.

41. Deck yourself out in all of your Harry Potter gear when you know you'll be going to a public place.

42. Walk past a wall over and over again, stopping randomly to bang on. When you receive weird stares, shout, "What?! I'm look for the Room of Requirement!"

43. Every time you see them, demand an explanation of why exactly they don't like Harry Potter.

44. If anyone tells you you'll go to hell for reading Harry Potter, either: a) jump and down and tell them that you can't wait; b) tell them you'll meet them there; c) sing "Weasley Is Our King" over and over again; or d) ask them to back up this claim with evidence, and laugh at them when they can't.

45. Play the soundtracks while they're stuck in your car.

46. ...add commentary. ( Oh, this is where they...)

47. When one of the movies is on TV, call to remind them.

48. ...every five minutes.

49. If they ask for your phone number, tell them it's 6-2-4-4-2.

50. Say "Alohomora!" everytime you open a door.

51. Sort every person you meet into one of the four Houses.

52. Follow them around while acting out a scene from the book doing very annoying voices for all the characters. Expect them to join in, and act offended when they don't.

53. Count down to some obscure Harry Potter event, whether it's Dumbledore's birthday, or when a Harry Potter DVD comes out. Keep saying: "87 (86, 85, etc.) more days!" in the middle of every conversation you have with your friend. Smile in a superior way when they ask what you're counting down to.

54. Start talking about a deceased Harry Potter character and suddenly burst into hysterical tears.

55. Refuse to be comforted.

56. Ask them to help you study for your O.W.L's and N.E.W.T's.

57. Knit them hats and insist that you're just trying to liberate them.

58. Talk to animals and insist that they're Animagi.

59. Treat them to lunch and then suddenly realize you can't pay for the meal since the restaurant doesn't accept Galleons, Sickles, or Knuts.

60. Run up to random men with long, dark hair and scream, "SIRIUS! I always knew you were alive!"

61. Point at modern electronic devices and loudly say, "Look at that! The things these Muggles come up with..."

62. Write letters to the editor of your local newspaper about the evils of our society ( Namely, Death Eaters and discrimination against friendly werewolves).

63. Send them numerous letters informing them that they have been selected to attend Hogwarts.

64. Carry around a shiny rock and proclaim that you possess the Sorcerer's Stone.

65. Say everything in a sing-song voice like Luna Lovegood.

66. End every converastion and/or letter with "Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!"

67. ...refuse to provide an explanation.

68. Tap all brick walls you encounter with an umbrella.

69. Say "Lumos" when turning on a light.

70. Point and grunt and insist that you're speaking Troll.

71. Refuse to wash your hair and explain that you're going for the Snape look.

72. Spend hours at a time trying to get your broom to fly.

73. Invite them over for the night and force them to watch the first three movies with you.

74. If they leave for any reason, restart the movie and tell them it's the Time Turner scene.

75. Shriek loudly and insist that you're speaking Mermish.

76. If you're asked to retrieve something, shout "Accio!" loudly.

77. ...when this doesn't work, throw a fit.

78. Demand to know what exactly the function of a rubber duck is.

79. Talk like Hagrid.

80. Point to garden gnomes and say, "Silly Muggles don't have a clue about what gnomes look like!" in a very loud voice.

81. Take them to a CD store and make them help you look for the newest Weird Sisters album.

82. Yell "Avada Kedavra" anytime they give the anti-HP lecture, then fake excruciating pain as your soul rips in two.

83. Write "Enemies of the Heir, BEWARE!" in red paint on their wall.

84. When confronted about the message, refuse to take responsibility and/or explain it further.

85. Hum Hedwig's Theme constantly and be sure to include any crescendos, decrescendos, accents, etc.

86. Petition to have Hedwig's Theme become the new National Anthem.

87. Wear all black and explain that you're in mourning over the death of "The Only One He Ever Feared."

88. ...when asked for am explanation of this cryptic title, cry hysterically.

89. Replace their entire movie collection with the Harry Potter films.

90. If they ask you about the weather, solemnly say, "Mars is bright tonight."

91. Print this out and use it as a checklist.

92. Insist that they subscribe for your new Harry Potter newsletter and when they say no, act like you've been seriously offended.

93. Potter Puppet Pals, anyone?

94. Knit them a maroon jumper every year - especially if maroon isn't their color.

95. When taking the stairs with them, stop and insist that you have to wait because the staircases are moving.

96. If someone turns off the lights, make a loud cracking sound and pretend to Apparate to the other side of the room.

97. Carry around a hip flask and refuse to drink anything anyone offers you.

98. Toss a small handful of sand and yell out, "Diagon Alley!"

99. If you go to a train station with them, loudly ask random people if they know where you can find Platform 9 3/4. Do this in an extremely fake British accent.

100. When your friend is checking sports scores, ask them if they can find out the score of the latest Quidditch match.

101. If they refuse, complain (loudly) that you missed the semi-final match between the Chudley Cannons and the Wimbourne Wasps and you need to know who will be advancing to the finals against the Tutshill Tornadoes.

102. At your next sleepover, draw a lightning-bolt scar on your forehead, and just as your friend is drifting off to sleep, grab your forehead and start screaming that you dreamed Voldemort killed your parents.

103. Fill a bowl with water and tie some tinsel to the end of your wand. Move the wand-tip from your temple to the bowl and pretend you're transferring your thoughts to a Pensieve, and ask not to be disturbed.

104. When at a train station with them, repeatedly throw yourself against the wall between Platforms 9 and 10. If someone asks if you need help, state in a panicked voice that you're going to miss the Hogwarts Express, and do they have a flying car that you could borrow?

105.At random moments, pick up a wand like object and run around a room, screaming deadly curses and disturbing jinxes. Then collapse, act faint and say that you must be immediately to St. Mungos for you had been placed under the Imperius curse. When not taken, repeat the process.

106. While playing chess with them, stare at your pieces and give them verbal commands.

107. Throw the chessboard across the room when the pieces don't move.

108. Invite them to play "find the Horcrux" with you.

109. Tell them you're wearing an invisibility cloak, then hide.

110. Say "Knock knock." When the person says "Who's there?", say "You Know." When they say "You Know Who?", roll on the floor laughing. When they say they don't get it, become very offended and refuse to explain.

111. Wear mismatched clothes and if someone asks you why say it's because you can never keep up with the muggle fashions.

112. Send out birthday party invitations for a Harry Potter character. Be sure to call everyone who doesn't respond and ask them if they're coming.

113. On the first day of school, ask all of your teachers if "Hogwarts, a History" will be required reading.

114. In casual conversation, mention things you've been taught by Professor Flitwick.

115. Call your local station or cable provider and ask if they will be carrying the Chuddly Cannon games this season.

116. Write all letters to said person on parchment with quills.

117. Whenever they read the newspaper in public, complain loudly about how Scrimegeour is paying them to keep the big stories quiet.

118. Drag them along to the nearest place that has old brick buildings, pull out your pink umbrella, and start tapping the bricks - explain that you're looking for Diagon Alley.

119. Whenever it's foggy outside, scream "The Dementors are coming!" and hide for days at a time.

120. Fill a bowl with water and tie some tinsel to the end of your wand. Move the wand-tip from your temple to the bowl and pretend you're transferring your thoughts to a Pensieve, and ask not to be disturbed.

121. Insist the radio is called a Wizarding Wireless Network.

122. When travelling long distances, insist on going by Floo Powder - while grabbing a handful of soil from the nearest flowerpot.

123. Tell them that they're almost as smart as Grawp.

124. ..refuse to tell them who Grawp is.

125. Speak in a loud harsh voice at random moments and make predictions about people. Then, use your normal voice again and pretend that you don't remember anything.

126. Constantly remind them that you're Dumbledore's man/woman through and through.

127. Walk up to random people and ask them if their initials are R.A.B.

128. If they say no, give them a dirty mistrusting look.

129. If they say yes, then tackle them and demand that they hand over the Horcrux.

130. Yell "Crucio" at drivers who cut you off.

131. Call them every night and ask what the Transfiguration homework is.

Things I am not allowed to do at Hogwarts:

1) Seamus Finnigan is not after me lucky charms

2) I will not sing "We're Off to See the Wizard" when sent to the Headmaster's office.

3) I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class

4) I will not, under any circumstances, ask Harry Potter who died and made him boss

5) Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda

6) Remus Lupin does not want a flea collar

7) First years are not allowed to be fed to Fluffy

8) I will not make any jokes about Lupin and his "time of the month"

9) I will not give Hagrid Pokemon cards and convince him they're real animals

10) I will not sing the Badger Song during Hufflepuff-Slytherin quidditch matches

12) When Death Eaters are attacking Hogsmeade, I shall not point at the Dark Mark and shout "To the Batmoblie, Robin!"

13) When a class-mate falls asleep, I shall not take advantage of the fact and draw a Dark Mark on his arm.

14) It's not necessary for me to yell "BURN!" every time Snape takes house points from Gryffindor

15) Any resemblance between Dementors and Nazgul is simply coincidental

16) I will not refer to the Weasley Twins as "bookends"

17) I will not scare the Arithmancy students with my Calculus book.

18) I will not hold my wand in the air before I casting spells shouting "I got the power!"

19) Its not necessary for me to yell "Bamf!" everytime I apparate.

20) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music when wandering the halls.

21) "To conquer the earth with flying monkeys" is not an appropriate career choice.

22) I am not allowed to make lightsaber sounds with my wand.

23) I am not allowed to paint the house elves blue and call them smurfs.

24) I will not slip Malfoy a Love Potion in his morning goblet of Pumpkin Juice.

25) I will not say the phrase "Dude, get a life" to Voldemort.

26) Should I chance to see a Death Eater wearing a white mask, I should not start singing anything from The Phantom of the Opera.

27) I will not refer to the Accio charm as "the Force".

28) I will not call Dumbledore "Santa Claus!" during the Christmas Holidays.

29) I will not put Muggle fairy book in the History section at the library.

30) I will not send Snape a bottle of shampoo for Christmas.

31.)I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "I told you I was hardcore".

32.)House elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers.

33.) Starting a betting pool on the fate of this year's Defense Against Dark Arts teacher is tasteless and tacky, not a
clever moneymaking concept.

34.)I am not allowed to tell Hufflepuffs there is no Santa Clause.

35.) I am not allowed to refer to myself as the New Dark Lord.

36.)I am not allowed to sneak into Professor Snapes private chambers to watch him sing I Will Survive in the mirror, as it is disturbing.

37.) I am not allowed to steal Professor Flitwicks wand, hold it over my head and laugh as he tries to reach it.

38.)I will not replace Madam Pomfrey's Skele-Gro with pumpkin juice.

39.) I will not replace Professor Snape's pumpkin juice with Skele-Gro.

40.) I will not impersonate the Swedish Chef in Potions class.

41.)The next time that I see Rita Skeeter, I am not to threaten her with a can of Raid.

42.)I will not subvert the lock on the fourth-floor girls' bathroom and sell its location to first-years as "The Chamber of Secrets".

43.)When applying for a post at the Ministry of Magic after graduation, I should not cite "Fred and George Weasley" as my greatest influence at Hogwarts.

44.)Putting down "Lord Voldemort" is probably not best either.

45.)A Muggle "vacuum cleaner" is not acceptable Quidditch equipment, even if it has been enchanted to fly.

46.) Hogsmeade village is not "a wretched hive of scum and villainy. “

47.)I will not tell Professor Trelawney that I prophesied her death.

48.). I will also not tell Professor Trelawney that I had a vision of her killing the Dark Lord.

49.)Sending rings to the nine senior faculty at Yuletide, with the return address "Voldemort", is not funny.

50.)Insisting that the school acquire computers and network the buildings is a pointless request as they claim that a quill and parchment is sufficient.

51.)Calling the Ghostbusters is a cruel joke to play on the resident ghosts and poltergeists.

52.)I may not have a private army.

53.) I must not substitute chocolate-flavored laxative for Professor Lupin's prescription-strength chocolate.

54.)Nor am I to in any way substitute, alter, hide, or otherwise tamper with Professor Dumbledore's candy.

55.)I am not the wicked witch of the west.

56.) -I will not refer to Professor Umbridge as such either.

57.) I will not melt if water is poured over me.

58.) -Neither will Professor Umbridge.

59.)I shouldn't use Photoshop to create incriminating photos of my house prefects or tutors.

60.)I will not enchant the Golden Snitch to fly up the nearest fan's nose.

61.) I do not know the Avada Kedavra curse, and pretending I do to people who annoy me is not funny, no matter how much they injure themselves diving for cover.

62.) I will not test my Potions assigments by spiking Snape's drink with them.

63.) - Especially not all of them at once.

64.) I will not try to hock off my old piercings as "priceless Muggle artifacts."

65.) I will not claim my X-Files tapes are "Auror Training Videos."

66.)Professor Snape definitely does not have pointed ears, and under no circumstances is he to be addressed as 'Spock'.

67.)I am not able to see the Grim Reaper, nor am I to claim that he is standing by the Headmaster, tapping an hourglass and looking at him impatiently. Or, for that matter, Harry Potter.

68.)When being interrogated by a member of staff, I am not to wave my hand and announce 'These are not the droids you are looking for'.

69.)Thestrals do not resemble the Muggle toys known as 'My Little Pony'.

70.)The four Houses are not the Morons, the Borons, the Smarts and the Junior Death Eaters.

71.)I am not authorized to negotiate a peace treaty with Voldemort.

72.)Despite my personal beliefs, Quidditch would not be improved by the introduction of muggle firearms.

73.)Though they are doubtless more athletic, battle-axes are not acceptable either.

74.)I will not claim there is a prequel to Hogwarts, A History that explains about Bilbo Baggins.

75.)I will not use the Marauder's Map for stalking purposes.

76.)I am not allowed to introduce Peeves to paintballing.

77.)I am not allowed to ask Professor Dumbledore if the size of his beard is 'compensating for something'.

78.)I will not create a betting pool on that Voldemort is Harry Potter's father.

79.)Headmaster Dumbledore is of no relation to Willy Wonka.

80.)Professor Snape's proper given name is not Princess Silvermoon Fairywing GlimmerMcSparkles.

81.) I will not take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.

82.)Harry Potter and Ron Weasley are not the magical equivalent of "Batman and Robin".

83.)I will not play the Imperial March theme for Professor Snape.

84.). - However, when Lucius Malfoy visits, I may play it.

85.)If I insist on carrying out my plans of producing "Riddle-de-dee: The Voldemort Musical", I will do so under a nom-de-plume.

86.) I will not attempt to recruit the title character to play himself. Even if he looks good in tap shoes.

87.)I should not refer to Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle collectively as "Team Rocket" either.

88.)I am not allowed to discuss my theory that Voldemort is actually the second cousin of Sauron.

89.)I am not a 'ninja sent here by Lord Voldemort to destroy Harry Potter' and should stop shouting this at meal times.

90.)It's not tasteful to approach Cho wearing a shirt that says All the good looking ones die young with a picture of Cedric Diggory on it.

91.)I will not yell "Hey look It's Lord Voldemort!" at Hogsmeade

92.)I will not tease Voldemort about the time he needed his pink flowery teddy bear to comfort him when he had that bad bad nightmare about Harry

93.)I will not charm a poster of Britney Spears on Draco's wall

94.) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work."

95.) I will not use my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot.

96.) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it.

97.) I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive.

98.) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast.

99.) I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day."

100.) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling.

101.)I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways.

102.) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween.

103.) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself to seriously.

104.) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knight's Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions.

105.) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet.

106.) I am not allowed to begin each Herbology class by singing the theme song to “Attack of the Killer Tomatoes.”

107.) I will not dress up as Voldemort for Halloween.

108.) I will not call Professor McGonagall “McGoogles”.

109.) I will not sing the entire Multiplication Rocks series during Arithmacy exams.

110.) Dumbledore is not Gandalf, and the Triforce is not hidden in Hogwarts.

111.) There is no such thing as the chamber of Double Secret Probation.

112.) My name is not “the Dark Lord Happy-Pants” I am not allowed to sign my papers as such.

113.) Bringing fortune cookies to divination class does not count for extra credit.

114.) I will not douse Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak with lemon juice to see if he will become visible while wearing it and standing by the fire in the common room.

115.) I will not tell first years they should build a tree house in the Whomping Willow.

116.) I will not teach the house elves to impersonate Jar Jar Binks.

117.) I will not give Gryffindors pixie sticks.

118.) I am not allowed to refer to Susan Bones, Hannah Abbot, and Justin Finch-Fletchley as Blossom, Buttercup, and Bubbles.

119.) A time turner is not a flux capacitator I should therefore not try to install it in a muggle car.

120.) I shall not refer to DADA professors as canaries in a coal mine.

121.) When fighting deatheaters in the annual June good vs. evil fight I will not lift my wand skyward and shout “There can only be ONE”.

122.) A wand is for magic only, it is not for picking noses, playing snooker, or playing drums no matter how bored I become.

123.) It is generally accepted that cats and dragons can not interbreed and I should not attempt to disprove this theory no matter how wicked the results would be.

124.) 42 is not the answer to every question on the O.W.L.S.

125.) I am allowed to have a cat, rat, toad, or an owl. I am not allowed to have reticulated python, snow leopard, Tasmanian devil, or piranha.

126.) No matter how good an Australian accent I can do I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class.

127.) I will not refer to the Defense against the Dark arts professor as Kenny, even if he is wearing an orange anorak.

If you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to have wings, copy and paste this into your profile

If you get a kick out of explosions, put this in your profile.

If you think you have too many of these "copy and paste this into your profile" thingies, but have no intention of stopping now, copy and paste this into your profile.

I LOST MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT! If that's ever happened to you, copy and paste this into your profile

My best friend is insane. If you are insane or if you have at least one insane friend, copy this into your profile. I am and so is my best friend

If you don't use MySpace and are proud enough to make it public, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are the complete opposite of normal, copy this into your profile.

If people don't like you the way you are, then by golly that's there problem. If you agree, copy and paste this into your profile.

The laws of physics often are frustrating, hard to brake, and often involve pain when it comes to gravity. If you agree, copy and paste this into your profile. If you are one of those poor souls who have challenged the laws of physics... Proudly copy and paste this into your profile!

If you have ever slapped your self on the head and/or banged your head on a table for no reason put this on your profile.

What's the big deal about Twilight? If you don't get what the big flipping deal about Twilight is, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.

If you are crazy and/or insane and proud of it copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you are mad that they have not discovered Tatooine, Naboo, Coroscant, and Kashyyyk, and all the other star systems out there, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you wonder why on earth they don't make Jedi Halloween costumes for girls (and are infuriated) copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate it when people refer to a lightsaber as a "lifesaver" copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are forever striving to achieve good grammar, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever been hit in the face with a ball and started laughing maniacally, copy and paste this into your profile.

I am an obsessive Grammar Fascist, engaged in a losing war against txt tlk. Join the fight!

If you ever felt like killing someone (or more than one person) because they wouldn't leave you alone when you told them not to distract you because you were busy copy this into your profile.

If several inanimate objects hate you copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever wished you could go into a book and strangle some of the characters for being so incredibly dumb, copy and paste this into your profile.

Copy this into your profile if you're a procrastination addict.

If you have ever yelled at the book you were reading because the characters did something stupid post this on your profile.

If you have copy-and-paste-itis (Like me) copy and paste this into your profile. No, wait, don't!

I hate pop-ups. If you hate all the ads popping up while you're trying to read some story, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever had a really bad day, gone and read fanfiction, and someone has a story that somehow made it all seem a little better, copy and paste.

If you do not drink alcohol, copy this to your profile.

If you don't do anything illegal, copy this to your profile.

If you're a night person, copy this to your profile.

If you have your own little world, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever said something that has nothing to do with the current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever pushed on a door that said pull or the vise versa copy this into your profile.

If you spend multiple hours each day reading or writing or a combination of both ,copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever talked to yourself, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are a self-proclaimed nerd, copy this into your profile.

If you think High School Musical just plain stunk and every copy should be burned, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you think the human identification thing when you log in to fan fiction is annoying, copy and past this into your profile.

If you have ever forgotten what you were going to say, right before you say it, copy this into your profile

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile

If you have ever zoned out for more than five consecutive minutes, copy this into your profile

If you don't know why people can't get it through their heads that members of the opposite gender can just be friends, copy and paste this into your profile

If you think life would be dull and dreary without technology, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you probably need a life but have no intentions of getting one, put it on your profile.

If you are weird, insane, crazy, odd, not-normal, a freak of nature, psychotic, random or anything similar, put this in your profile.

If there are characters on a certian show (no need to mention names) that you HATE BEYOND ALL REASON... copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever spent a long amount of time looking for something that you were holding/wearing, copy this to your profile

90 of 100 teens today would die if Myspace had a system failure and was completely destroyed...If you are one of the 10 that would be laughing, copy and paste this to your Profile.

If you have ever thought about murdering a fictional character and actually got so into it you started plotting, put this on your profile.

92 percent of the teenage population would die if Abercrombie and Fitch and American Eagle said that it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. put this in your profile if you're part of the 8 percent that would be laughing your butt off.

If you actually enjoy reading, copy this into your profile.

If you are of the opinion that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever read something and got sucked into that book, copy this into your profile.

If you enjoy books about dragons, copy this into your profile.

If you enjoy fantasy in general, copy this into your profile.

If you have multiple personalities that are each writing a different story right now, copy this into your profile

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

Nerds are cool. Nerds are smart. Nerds will one day rule the universe. If you are a nerd and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever fallen up a flight of stairs, copy this, put it in your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile.

If you think that being unique is better than being cool then put this on your profile.

If you are odd and proud of it put this on your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this one your profile.

98 percent of teenagers drink or have been around alcohol, put this in your profile if you're one of the 2 that hasen't.

If you've ever burst out laughing in a quiet room, copy this into your profile

If you have ever cried when your favorite character in a movie, T.V show, or book died, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever felt like something was watching you and then turned around to find nothing, copy and paste this into your profile.

If several inanimate objects hate you post this on profile.

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you haven't died yet, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you have ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever gotten so completely sidetracked in a conversation that you don't remember why you were talking in the first place, copy this into your profile.

If you've ever threatened your computer, copy and paste this into your profile

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you wish that fictional characters were real, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you are addicted to Fan-Fiction, copy this.

If you have ever read a book so many times that you can quote it word for word( And you do at random moments) copy and paste this in you're profile.

If you are in lala land most of the time copy this onto your profile.

Freedom is not free, but its worth fighting for!

A large percent of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're." If you're one of the ones who does know and wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped where there is a ‘watch your step’ sign, copy this into your profile

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you haaaaattttteeeee Dora put this in your profile

95 of 100 teens would cry if they saw Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montanna at the top of a skyscraper about to jump. Copy and paste this if you are in the 5 that would push them off, copy and paste this in your profile!

Milk tastes good. People call me crazy, but I'm just random! If you're random and proud of it, copy and paste this in your profile!

If you hear voices of book characters in your head, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you know someone who should get run over by a bus, copy this into your profile.

If Fanfiction is to you is what MySpace is to other people, copy this into your profile.

If you should be doing homework right now, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If you like animals, give one a home if you can. If you already have or can't but want to spread the word, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever heard of National Talk Like a Pirate Day, copy this into your profile. (September 19! Don't forget!)

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, copy and paste this in your profile.

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

f you have ever had a song stuck in your head for more than three weeks, copy and paste this into your profile.

Did you know the average American only reads 3 books a year? If you don't believe that it's even possible to read that little, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think that writing or reading Fanfic stories is fun, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you have ever read a novel over 300 pages in under 4 hours, paste this into your profile.

If you are a person who acts friendly but has an evil mind and is secretly plotting world domination, copy and paste this into your profile

If your obsessed with dragons, ravens, wolves and fantasy copy and paste this in your profile

For me, crazy is a loose term. Crazy is when you stare at a pencil and laugh when someone asks you what you are doing that is so interesting about the eraser. Crazy is when you have an hour-long sob fest, and then start singing and dancing when your favorite song comes on. Crazy is when you do or say a completely random thing, like "Do you ever wonder where the eraser bits go?" or having a thumbwar with yourself. Crazy is when you type up all your favorite sayings, print them off and tape them to your wall, just for something to do. Crazy is when you memorize the complete biographies and physical traits of every character in Eragon (or almost, at least). Crazy is when you write fang or Link is hot on your homework insted of doing it. Crazy is when you act completly, well, crazy and make a total fool of yourself and not even care. Crazy is when you dedicate your entire being (every cell in your body) to Eragon, Maximum Ride, and fanfiction. Crazy is when you go into build-a-bear workshop and walk up to little kids saying "That's my favorite bear" in a creepy voice and then run like heck when their soccer-moms glare at you. Crazy is when you get jacked up on sugar on your school fieldtrip to bush gardens, laugh for two hours striat WHILE riding rollercaosters, then still laugh after you get slapped by your freinds, and they pour a cold water on you, and you just stop suddenly, and when they asked why you laughed you say " I felt like it." Crazy is when you claim you can walk on water and then get your best friend to hold you by your waist in the air and you move your legs in a walking movement (It works!!) Crazy is when you spend your entire night (from 10:00 pm to 7:00 am) on Tumblr. If you're crazy, copy this onto your profile and add something crazy you've done too

If ever you find yourself talking, and then suddenly you realize that you don't know what you are saying, copy and paste this into your profile

You don't have to be a twig to be beautiful. If you agree, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are one of the proud teens/adults who have a v-o-c-a-b-u-l-a-r-y and do not limit themselves to "omg!" and "Like, that is, like, so, like, totally awsome...!". copy and paste this into your profile.

If reading is a buzzilion times better than watching brain-numbing TV, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you use words like "buzzilion", copy and paste this into your profile.

If you know a video game/book/movie/anime/manga character or weapon that need(s) to exist, copy and paste this into your profile

One thing: What's the big deal about Twilight? If you don't get what the big flipping deal about Twilight is, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you prefer cold and snow over heat and sun, paste this to your profile.

If you think clowns are evil and will someday take over the world copy this on your profile.

If you think everything looks better organized copy this onto your profile.

If your teacher has to constantly tell you to stop laughing or your gonna die, copy and paste this onto your profile

If you're part of the 0.0000000001 percent of people who does NOT have a MySpace, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have started having dreams featuring the Inheritance Cycle, copy and paste this to your profile

If one of your hobbies is going back over a hopelessly sidetracked conversation to try to figure out what started it, you, like me, have no life. If so, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you get easily obsessed copy this to your profile

If you have ever listend to a song repeatadly, copy this onto your profile.

…In Remembrance to Severus Snape….

….A Slytherin who died like a Gryffindor…

...without all the red and gold crap.

…In Remembrance to Fred Weasley…

…Who fought bravely to the very end….

…And whose jokes will forever brighten his other half…

…And will loyally await his soul mate and brother…

… with many jokes…

...he's got forever to think of them, right?

…In Remembrance to Dobby…

…Who was more free and full of love…

...than any elf, and most humans.

….In Remembrance to Remus J. Lupin….

...the last real Marauderer...

…who was not just a wonderful father…

….a incredible husband and brave hero…

...as well as a freakin' awesome werewolf.

….In Remembrance to Nymphadora Tonks…

…who died for ‘the greater good’…

...and would probably hex me for calling her Nymphadora.

…In Remembrance of Alastor ‘Mad-Eye’ Moody….

…who’s motto ‘constant vigilance’ kept him alive…

...and scared the crap out of some kids too.

In Remembrance to Bellatrix Lestrange…

… because it’s was awesome how Molly slapped her with that Avada Kedavra!

She deserved everything she got and more.

…In Remembrance of Colin Creevey…

…who we really didn’t know too well…

…but took a lot of pictures and died fighting in a war…

…so he must’ve done something good…

…besides stalking Harry.

…In Remembrance of Hedwig…

...Harry's actual first friend…

...who lived and died soaring.

If you've ever tried to put your hair behind your ears and ended up poking yourself in the eye, copy this into your profile.

If you think that people on commercials talk funny or use phrases no human beings would ever say, copy this into your profile

If your profile is long, copy and paste this on it to make it even longer. (Ehehehe)

If you have ever attempted to high-five someone and missed completely, copy and paste this into your profile.

If ever you have spent a day looking for a particular word, and when someone mentions it you dramatically slap your forehead and yell "OOOHHH!! That's the word I was looking for!" copy and paste this into your profile.

If you hate violence in the world and want peace, copy this onto your profile.

If you hear voices in your head, copy and paste this onto your profile!

If you KNOW the voice in your head are real, copy and paste this onto your profile!

If you're such a loser that you actually read these copy into your profile things, copy this into your profile.

98% of the internet population has a Myspace. If you're part of the 2% that can resist stupid fads, copy and paste this into your profile.

Admitting you are weird means you are normal. Saying that you are normal is odd. If you admit that you are weird and like it, copy this onto your profile.

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever walked into a window, copy this onto your profile (yeah... that was funny!)

Pessimism is good. If you are always pessimistic, you will never be disappointed, because you are thinking of the worst case scenario. If you agree, copy and paste this into your profile.

I prefer solitude over company. Copy and paste this in your profile you have the same feeling.

If you know there's more to good random humor than saying "cheese", "fudge", or "pie", copy and paste this into your profile.

If you often read three or more books at the same time, copy and paste this into your profile

If you've ever run into a stop sign, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever run into a stop sign more than once, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you think that being normal is vastly overrated, copy and paste this onto your profile

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, if well aimed.

Common sense is the enemy of comedy.

Why be difficult when, with a bit of effort, you can be impossible?

The number of people watching you is directly proportional to the stupidity of your action.

You have a right to your opinions. I just don't want to hear them.

You may call it being a smart-aleck, I call it explaining why you're an idiot.

Look to your left, look to your right, look ahead, just never look back.

If you do it you'll regret it, if you don't do it you'll regret it, either way you're going to regret it, so you might as well just do it.

When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.

According to a certain american comedien, we canadians are a bunch of "syrup-sucking iceholes". Love it!!

Me? Sarcastic? Of course not! I'm far too ditzy to grasp the subtlties of mockery.

To think is to differ.

Just a big burst of friggin' sunshine. That's me.

If the pen is mightier than the sword, how come actions speak louder than words?

When. I. Read. Stuff. Like. This. The. Voice. In. My. Head. Takes. Pauses.

Strength comes in numbers but victory comes with cleverness.

I don't know, I don't care, and it doesn't make any difference

Sarcasm isn't an attitude, it's an ART

I'm not prejudiced. I hate everyone equally.

I used to be lost in the shuffle. Now I just shuffle along with the lost.

My attiention span is just short enough to annoy you and ignore you at the same time.

I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed opponent.

Remember that everyone is unique.

A good friend convinces you not to jump off the cliff. A best friend hugs you and says "Goodbye, I'll miss you. Can I have your iPod?"

I smile because I have no idea what’s going on.

Invade and dominate Wonka Factory and become a Sith Chocolateer today!

Boys are like slinkeys, useless, but fun to watch fall down the stairs.

there are very few personal problems that can't be excused by an adequate amount of high explosives.

Some people are alive only because its illegal to kill them.

It's a control freak thing, I wouldn't let you understand.

If at first you don't succeed, redefine success.

There are few problems that can not be solved with large amounts of explosives.

If practice makes perfect, but nobody can be perfect, why practice?

I hate it when the voices and my imaginary friends fight.

Lying is the most fun a girl can have without owning a flamethrower. However, I own a flamethrower, and therefore, life holds more fun for me then just lying!

Boys don't fall for me; I trip them.

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried

I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor". A long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck, my friends, for I may not return alive.

I don't suffer from insanity... I enjoy every minute of it

They say "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well, I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

I was gifted, but the psychiatrist took away my powers

I never make stupid mistakes. Only very, very clever ones.

Obsession? What do you mean I have an obsession? (hides book behind back)

I'm a proud member of the hyperactive club twitch.

We're all mad here

If everyone else goes right I'm going left.

Crazy doesn't even begin to cover it...

Life isn't passing me by. It's trying to run me over.

Don't mess with me, I have a stick.

Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life.

Usually when people are sad, they don't do anything. They just cry over their condition. But when they get angry they bring about a change.

If you can't see the bright side of life, polish up the dull side.

You know there's a problem with the education system when you realize that out of the three R's only 1 begins with an R.

I have lots of ideas. Trouble is, most of them suck.

Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.

I don't have an attitude problem, you have a perception problem.

The absolute greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you can't.

Hunting is not a sport. In a sport, both sides know they're playing.

Does being fluent in sarcasm count as a second language?

I will not go on facebook, I will not go on facebook, I will not go on facebook, Damn, here I am again.

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

Life isn't passing me by, its trying to run me over.

"...Avoid roasted cabbage, do not eat earwax, and always look on the bright side of life!" -Angela the Herbalist

I'm so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I'm saying.

Come to the dark side...we have cookies you can chuck at people.

Everything is possible. The impossible just takes longer.

Life isn't weird. It's just the people in it.

Define Normal.

You think you're all that and a bag of chips. Well I'm all that and a bag of skittles. So taste my rainbow

Even I don't trust my better judgement. What's that say to you?"

"You have enemies? Good, because that means you've stood for something sometime in your life."

Sometimes you're the bug, and sometimes you're the windshield..

Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before. (Unknown but funny)

My sources are unreliable, but their information is facinating.

My mind is a very scary place.

When told to go to hell, I reply with " but what about the restraining order the devil has against me?"

I'm not a smart mouth...I'm simply stating my individuality.

I may forget what someone may say or do but I do not forget how they made me feel.

Why is life giving everyone else lemons? I'm sitting here with a grapefruit thinking "what the heck?"

Everything here is eatable. I'm eatable, but that my dear children is called cannibalism and is frowned upon in most societies.

The Crazy Hyperactive Authoress To-Do List: Created by Wolf (She-Who-Has-A-Very-Long-Name)

1.) Write Saw: The Musical.

2.) Develop the ability to talk to vegetables.

3.) Learn how to "billow" like Severus Snape.

4.) Make action figure of yourself.

5.) Prove to the word that gay sparkly vampires are even more pathetic than they believe.

6.) Enrage obsessed fan girls.

7.) Scream out random endings when walking out of the movie theater. (I can't believe it! Optimus killed Sam and ran off with Megatron!)

8.) Teach monkeys how to skydive.

9.) Create first ever cheese laser.

10.) Have own theme music.

11.) Find the penny at the bottom of the razor blade and and salt-filled jar.

12.) Discover why Dora the Explorer's parents let her explore the world all by herself.

13.) Sing made-up lyrics to Christmas Carols. During the summer.

14.) Read Shakespeare. You know, like in Romeo and Juliet, where Juliet fights that lion, and Romeo destroys the giant space station, and they all go to Burger King...yeah, I don't really know my Shakespeare stuff that well.

15.) Also prove to the children how Santa sits on the throne of lies.

16.) If this isn't enough, scream "I GOT CAKE MIX!" all the time. (Nemesis.)

17.) Warn younger children that if they aren't good this Christmas, Santa's little Dementors will come and suck all of their happiness away. Run from livid parents.

18.) Use security cameras as mirrors to pick your nose.

19.) Run around with a Force FX lightsaber, claimign you are a Jedi that must slay the evils of the world. Then attack anyone wearing Hannah Montana apparel.

20.) Develop sense of irony.

21.) Don't die yet.

22.) Copy and paste this onto your profile if you're an insane authoress/author, too!

You Know You're an Author If:

You talk to yourself a lot. (e.g. Hmm, what would happen if it was sunny the day Bella got hit by the van? Oh, story idea!! Must get computer!)

You talk to yourself about talking to yourself. (e.g. 'Why do I constantly ask my self random things?')

When you talk to yourself you often talk to yourself like you're talking to someone else. (e.g. 'Have you ever noticed that deliver could mean take out someone's liver?')

After uttering a profound piece of wisdom like that above, you stare at the cookie in your hand with awe and say, "Wow,this stuff is great for sugar highs...'

You live off of sugar and caffeine.

You've ever stuck a big word into a sentance after a dumb word (e.g. 'College is so, like, totally daunting')

Your vacation is ruined because you forgot your laptop at home and just discovered an amazing plot for a story.

You'll check your e-mail every day of the week and then disappear off the face of the earth.

You're e-mails tend to be pages long and incredibly random.

When replying to an e-mail, you'll never actually address the point of it.

You tend to collect Bic Stics off the ground like picking pennies off the ground.

No matter where you are in a room you never have to get up to find a pen/pencil and paper.

The letters on your keyboard are wearing off.

Your friends and family think that you have carpal tunnel syndrome.

People think you have A.D.D.

You think it'd be cool to have A.D.D.

You correct spelling problems and various mistakes on the worksheets your teachers pass out.

You want to type one thing to someone, but then end up writing a novel.

That short story your english teacher assigned you to write came out as a 30-page story compared to the 5-page tales everyone else did.

You constantly start talking in third person, present or past tense. (All the time. You don't even know!)

You start thinking about making lists like this and start giggling for no "apparent" reason

Your friends stopped looking at you funny for no apparent reason a loooooong time ago.

And FINALLY, the one way to tell if you're a good writer: You failed English 101. (Actually this does not aply but w.e.)

(copy that into you're profile if you fit one or more of the descriptions)

You Know You're a Book Addict If:

You can randomly open to a page and know exactly what's going on.

Read the book until 4 A.M., then get back up at 7 to continue reading.

You write fanfictions about the book. (teehehe)

You try to get all of your friends (and everyone else) to read it.

You accidentally call everyone by the character's names.

Everything reminds you of the book.

You quote random lines all the time.

You try to do things that the characters do, even though you know you can't. (like, um, magic powers, or taking a Fangish vow of silence, or trying to break Nudge's talking record)

You've gotten incredibly bored in class, and debated on doing something your favorite character can do to escape the class (e.g. flip a desk over then fly out the window, turn into a wolf and maul someone, turn invisible and 'haunt' the school then laugh as the FBI freaks out, light your book on fire and cackle demonically...)

You have pictures of your favorite characters on your iPod.

You've got a book memorized.

You've read a book more than five times.

You've read a book with 400 pages in less than two days.

You've planned and prepared a siege on a writer's house because he/she killed a character you like.

You've plotted to murder a character and steal her boyfriend.

You hate it when someone calls your favorite character fictional

You blatantly deny it when someone calls a character fictional.

You check your back every morning in the mirror to see if you've sprouted wings and can join the flock.

You test your hand in sunlight to check and see if you're still (unfortunately) human.

You've closed your eyes and tried to morph into a wolf.

You've found yourself trying to impersonate a character.

Your idol is a character from a book

If you ever felt like just running somewhere, copy this into your profile

Only crazy people can understand the brilliance of crazy things. If you are crazy and proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile!

Most people would be offended if someone asked them what was wrong with their mind. copy this into your pro if you would be one of the few people that would answer, "where to begin?"

.:FIRE:.
You have a short temper.
You often act on your emotions without thinking first.
You are very competitive.
You like to play with fire.
You are not a strong swimmer or you can't swim at all.
You prefer warm weather over cold weather.
You often lose control over yourself.
You can be quite reckless.
You sometimes hurt people without realizing it.
People have often called you insane.
Total:6

.:WATER:.
You have a calm, laid-back personality.
You like to go to the beach.
You rarely get angry.
When you do get angry, you know how to control it.
You think before you act.
You are good at breaking up fights.
You are a good swimmer.
You like the rain.
You can stay calm in stressful situations.
You are very generous.
Total: 5

.:EARTH:.
You are physically strong.
You have a close connection with nature.
You don't mind getting dirty.
You form strong opinions on issues that concern you.
You could easily survive in the wild.
You care about the environment.
You can easily focus on your work without getting distracted.
You rarely get depressed.
You aren't afraid of anything.
You prefer to have a strict set of rules.
Total:7

.:AIR:.
You have a free spirit.
You hate rules.
You prefer to be out in the open rather than in small, enclosed spaces.
You hate to be restrained.
You are very independent and outgoing.
You are quite intelligent.
You tend to be impatient.
You are easily distracted.
You can sometimes be hyperactive and/or annoying.
You wish you could fly.
Total:9

.:DARKNESS:.
You spend most of your time alone
You prefer nighttime over daytime.
You like creepy things.
You like to play tricks on people.
Black is your favorite color.
You prefer the villains over the heroes in movies, TV shows, video games, etc.
You don't talk much.
You are atheist.
You don't mind watching scary movies.
You love to break the rules.
Total:5

.:LIGHT:.
You are very polite.
You are spiritual.
When someone is in trouble, you never hesitate to help them.
You believe everything you see or hear.
You are afraid of the dark.
You hate violence.
You hope for world peace.
You are generally a happy person.
Everyone loves to be around you.
You always follow the rules.
Total:4

A List of Favorites

Favorite Disney Pairing: Eugene and Rapunzel

Favorite Disney Movie: The Avengers (No, no, Disney really does own Marvel)

Favourite other movie: Harry Potter

Favorite Color: Loki Green

Second Favorite Website (other than www.fanfiction.net, of course!): Tumblr

Favorite Book: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

1. My boy side

] I love hoodies.
[x] I love jeans.
] Dogs are better than cats.
[x] It’s hilarious when people get hurt.
] Shopping is torture
] Sad movies suck
[x] You own a car racing game.
[x] You played with hot wheels cars as a kid.
] At some point in time you wanted to be a firefighter.
[x] You owned a ds, ps2, ps3, n64, or sega.
] You used to be obsessed with power rangers.
[x] You have watched sports on tv.
] Gory movies are cool.
[x] You go to your dad for advice.
] You hate drama.
] You own like a trillion baseball caps.
] You used to collect hockey cards.
[x] Baggy sweats are cool to wear.
] It’s kinda weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
[x] Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colours.
[x] You love to go crazy and not care what people think.
[x] Sports are fun.
[x] You talk with food in your mouth.
[x] You sleep with your socks on at night.
] You have fished at least once. Score:13

2. My girl side

[x] You love to shop.
] You wear eyeliner.
[x] You wear the colour pink.
[x] You go to your mum to talk.
[x] You consider cheerleading a sport.
] You hate wearing the colour black.
[x] You like going to the shopping centre
[x] You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
[x] You like wearing jewelry.
] You cried watching the notebook
] Dresses are a big part of your wardrobe.
] Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
] You don’t like the movie star wars.
[x] You are/were in gymnastics.
] It takes you around one hour to shower, get dressed, and make-up.
] You smile a lot more than you should.
[x] You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
[x] You care about what you look like.
] You like wearing dresses when you can.
] You like wearing high heel shoes.
[x] You used to play with dolls as little kid.
] You like putting make-up on others.
[x] You like being the star of everything.Score:12

3. Appearance

] I am shorter than 5′5″.
[x] I have many scars.
] I tan easily.
[x] I wish my hair was a different colour.
] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
] I have a tattoo.
[x] I am self-conscious about my appearance.
] I’ve had/have braces.
] I’ve been told i’m attractive by a complete stranger.
] I have more than two piercings.
] I have/had piercings in places besides my ears.

4. Experiences

] I’ve gotten lost in my city.
[x] I’ve seen a shooting star.
[x] I’ve wished on a shooting star.
] I’ve seen a meteor shower.
[x] I’ve gone out in public in my pajamas.
[x] I’ve pushed all the buttons in a lift
[x] I’ve kicked a guy where it hurts.
] I’ve been to a casino.
[x] I always get mistaken as much older than I actually am.
] I’ve been skydiving.
] I’ve gone skinny-dipping.
] I’ve drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour.
] I’ve crashed a car.
[x] I’ve been skiing.
[x] I’ve been in a musical.
] I’ve caught a snowflake or snow on my tongue.
] I’ve seen the northern lights.
[x] I’ve sat on a rooftop at night.
[x] I’ve played a prank on someone.
[x] I’ve ridden in a taxi.
] I’ve seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
[x] I’ve eaten sushi.
] I’ve been snowboarding.

5. Relationships

[x] I’m single.
] I’m in a relationship.
] I’m engaged.
] I’m married.
] I miss someone right now.
] I've played with someone’s emotions on purpose before.
] I’ve gotten divorced.
[x] I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t.
] I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did.
[x] LOKI'D

6. Honesty/Crime

[x] I’ve done something I promised someone else I wouldn’t.
[x] I’ve done something I promised myself I wouldn’t.
] I’ve snuck out
] I’ve lied to my parents about where I am.
[x] I’ve cheated while playing a game.
] I’ve ran a red light.
] I’ve witnessed a crime.
] I’ve been in a fist fight.
] I’ve been arrested.

7. Death and suicide

] I’m afraid of dying.
] I hate funerals.
[x] I've thought about how i would die.
[x] I’ve seen someone/something dying.
[x] I've had a near death experience.
[x] Someone close to me has attempted/committed suicide.
] I’ve planned my own suicide before.
] I’ve written a eulogy for myself.

8. Random

[x] I can sing well
] Stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.
] I open up to others easily.
] My parents are divorced.
] I watch the news.
] I don’t kill bugs.
] I sing in the shower.
] I am a morning person.
] I’ve been abused.
] I paid for a mobile phone ring tone.
] I am a sports fanatic.
] I twirl my hair.
[x] I care about grammar.
] I have “?”’s in my screen name.
] I’ve copied more than 30 cd’s in a day.
[x] I bake well.
[x] My favorite colour is either white, yellow, pink, red, blue, black, purple, or orange.
] I would wear pajamas to school.
] I like Martha Stewart.
[x] I know how to shoot a gun.
[x] I laugh at my own jokes.
] I eat fast food weekly.
[x] I’ve not turned anything in and still got an a in a certain class.
[x] I can’t sleep if there is a spider/cockroach in the room.
] I am ticklish.
] I love white chocolate.
] I bite my nails.
[x] I’m good at remembering faces.
[x] I’m good at remembering names.
[x] I’m good at remembering dates.
[x] I honestly have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.

GRYFFINDOR:
[x] You’ve never done illegal drugs
[x] You have a lot of friends
] You get along with everyone
] You haven’t made fun of someone for at least two months
] You love soccer
] You love baseball
[x] You’re into writing and art
] Favourite music genre is pop rock
[x] You believe in “innocent until proven guilty” theory (Weeeeeell... sort of...)
] Abortion is wrong
[x] One of your favourite colours is red or gold
[x] Good grades at school
] One of the worst things you can do is lie
[x] You plan on going to college/university
Total:7

HUFFLEPUFF:
[x] You’re content with mostly everything in your life right now.
[x] You laugh a lot
] You like to follow trends.
[x] Politics suck.
[x] You love to swim
] Water polo is awesome
] Pink is one of your favourite colours
[x] Black is morbid & depressing but you still like it though
] Michael Jackson is talented as a musical artist.
] You’re an optimist.
] You’re completely straight-edge.
[x] You’re very emotional
] Rap, R&B, & hip-hop is your favourite music genre
] You don’t believe in going steady at a young age
[x] You’ve made fun of at least one person this week.
Total:7

RAVENCLAW:
] You’re depressed to a certain extent.
[x] You love to read.
[x] You appreciate theatre & arts.
] Sports suck.
[x] You’re shy.
] Hate is completely unneeded.
[x] Loyalty is the MOST important thing in a relationship
] Indie is your favourite genre of music.
[x] Every once in awhile you have little anger outbursts.
[x] Lying is sometimes okay
[x] Blue is one of your favourite colours.
] Serious is better than funny.
Total:7

SLYTHERIN:
[x] There’s at least one person you hate.
] Basketball is a good sport.
] (American) Football is amazing.
] Black is a cool colour.
[x] You've lied about something serious.
[x] You’re a very deep person.
] You have considered suicide.
[x] Very loyal.
] You like metal.
[x] They make school seem more important than it is.
[x] You’re scared to grow up.
] You’ve done drugs in the past month.
] Anger is one of your primary feelings.
[x] You have trust issues.
[x] Guilty until proven guilty
Total:8

Sort: Category . Published . Updated . Title . Words . Chapters . Reviews . Status .

Cops and Robbers by InkySpectacles reviews
"Let me get this straight." Lestrade groaned as he surveyed the damage. "You took out half the cameras in London, 'borrowed' three cars, and knocked out half my team just because you were playing some convoluted cops and robbers game with Mycroft?"
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Adventure/Humor - Chapters: 25 - Words: 23,008 - Reviews: 614 - Favs: 1,245 - Follows: 1,121 - Updated: 3/28/2015 - Published: 3/4/2012 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
5 Times They Kissed for a Case, and 1 Time They Kissed for Real by fleetwood-mouse reviews
A stolen ring! An artful blogger! And many more adventures for your enjoyment.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 6 - Words: 24,881 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 73 - Follows: 90 - Updated: 12/17/2014 - Published: 2/4/2013 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Expecting something unexpected by Lu82 reviews
Thor brought Loki home and now he has to face the Asgardian law. Odin already knows very well what to do, but what if there were… unexpected consequences? A rather crazy Post Avengers. Thoki… or Lhor; what you prefer XD. WARNING: this is a Mpreg story, if it's not your cup of tea, don't read it! XD
Thor - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 64,037 - Reviews: 230 - Favs: 202 - Follows: 211 - Updated: 8/12/2014 - Published: 5/21/2012 - Loki, Thor - Complete
Rehabilitation by YIWT reviews
When Loki falls, Thor dives after him and snatches him back. The Allfather punishes his wayward son. Warning for torture. Not slash.
Thor - Rated: M - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 43 - Words: 130,655 - Reviews: 821 - Favs: 594 - Follows: 629 - Updated: 1/13/2014 - Published: 5/21/2012 - Thor, Loki
Academia by AlwaysFidelius reviews
*Secondary school AU* Sherlock Holmes, the class genius, and John Watson, an avid football player, become an unlikely team within the halls of the elite Newcastle School.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 31 - Words: 93,299 - Reviews: 267 - Favs: 264 - Follows: 402 - Updated: 1/8/2014 - Published: 3/8/2012 - Sherlock H., John W.
Colors and Promises by SouvenirsFamiliers reviews
Thor and Loki's love story, from the beginning to the end of the world. Thunderfrost.
Thor - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 13 - Words: 16,849 - Reviews: 29 - Favs: 55 - Follows: 85 - Updated: 8/27/2013 - Published: 7/25/2012 - Loki, Thor
Life As Usual by WebbWaffles reviews
Sherlock and John texting. Not related to any specific episodes, just how life is between cases. No real plot at all just some fun :D
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 41 - Words: 9,278 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 52 - Follows: 86 - Updated: 7/8/2013 - Published: 3/21/2012 - Sherlock H., John W.
The Enterprise Gang Watches Star Trek Into Darkness by SpirkTrekker42 reviews
Our heroes (and villains) are forced to watch Star Trek Into Darkness and comment on it. This is a humor/parody fic of the new Star Trek movie. The whole thing is a HUGE SPOILER. Follows the same template as my first fic when they watch the 2009 movie. I mention Spock/Uhura cause that is the ship in the movie, but I of course allude to K/S and a bunch of other ships too.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 9,064 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 93 - Follows: 70 - Updated: 6/15/2013 - Published: 5/18/2013 - J. Kirk, Spock, N. Uhura, Thomas H. - Complete
Reading Subtext by Englandwouldfall reviews
Five times Sherlock tried to tell John he was interested... and one time the message was actually delivered. Johnlock (obviously).
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 9 - Words: 36,464 - Reviews: 147 - Favs: 375 - Follows: 188 - Updated: 5/10/2013 - Published: 3/15/2013 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
It's Usually Subtext by RissaCay reviews
When John transfers to a prestigious private school to play for the #1 football team in the country-with a broken family, extreme anxiety, and all the pressures of a starting position as central offense-he hardly expects his curious new roommate to be his greatest priority. But as John soon learns, nothing about Sherlock Holmes is easily expected. AU TEENLOCK ((please review))
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 9 - Words: 10,932 - Reviews: 111 - Favs: 48 - Follows: 115 - Updated: 5/4/2013 - Published: 1/31/2013 - John W., Sherlock H.
Coffee and Deductions by Arty Diane reviews
When John and Sherlock go to restaurants or cafes for different reasons, they deduce those around them to pass the time. But the results are not always what they expect, sometimes they get observed themselves! A series of one shots. Chapter 8, "Through the woods and into the restaurant" How do our detectives deal with getting lost in the woods? For Lucy36's birthday!
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 8 - Words: 12,332 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 26 - Follows: 39 - Updated: 4/5/2013 - Published: 12/3/2012 - Sherlock H., John W., DI Lestrade
Lost & Found by Angelpops1818 reviews
Started out as one-shots, then I got carried away. Little insights into the daily lives of the Consulting Detective and his Blogger. Maybe some angst and adventurey stuff poured in for good measure.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 21 - Words: 16,352 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 51 - Updated: 3/24/2013 - Published: 10/22/2012 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Spilt Milk by Liberty-In reviews
John and Mary really hit it off, but there's something Sherlock's not saying.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,157 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 51 - Follows: 7 - Published: 3/10/2013 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
5 Times He's Dumped, 1 Time He Isn't by slimandalittlebitfoxy reviews
John is dumped five times, usually with the help of a certain consulting detective. But then, there's the one time he isn't... Five Plus One. Johnlock.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,552 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 4 - Published: 2/23/2013 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
Happy Birthday John by Starlight05 reviews
When an important date comes up, Sherlock finds himself doing something he never has before - shopping! But will he succeed and manage to get his best friend a present? Not my best summary but oh well.
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Humor/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,580 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 43 - Follows: 6 - Published: 2/18/2013 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Cupid's Bow by imagination junkie reviews
Sherlock nearly blows up the flat. John makes breakfast. Kissing ensues. Light, fluffy, shameless JohnLock slash.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,365 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 36 - Follows: 5 - Published: 2/14/2013 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
50 sentences - Sherlock and John by Archerea
I'm doing it again - 50 sentences, this time for Sherlock Holmes and John Watson of BBC's Sherlock, because I simply adore that show and had to try my hand at a fic for it. Also, rated T for minor suggestive adult themes and a little post-violence, but nothing too bad.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,160 - Favs: 2 - Published: 2/13/2013 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
Worry by Proud Blood-Traitor reviews
After John and Sherlock have an argument, John decides to stay away for the night. But soon Sherlock gets worried. Johnlock. Established relationship. Slash.
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,413 - Reviews: 10 - Favs: 47 - Follows: 13 - Published: 2/11/2013 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
No Such Liberty by X-parrot reviews
Post-Avengers. Thor takes Loki back to Asgard in chains, but this does not mean that the god of mischief's schemes are ended, or that Thor has or ever will give up on his brother. But when Thanos comes to the realm to claim his lost prizes, on which side will Loki fall?
Avengers - Rated: T - English - Drama/Family - Chapters: 32 - Words: 153,673 - Reviews: 431 - Favs: 393 - Follows: 188 - Updated: 2/6/2013 - Published: 9/12/2012 - Loki, Thor - Complete
Irrational by Katherinerachh reviews
Sherlock panics when John stops replying to texts. Sweet fluffy friendship (and Johnlock if you squint)
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 6 - Words: 2,583 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 31 - Updated: 2/2/2013 - Published: 1/29/2013 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Sherlock's Birthday, or, How Not to Celebrate One by felinefemme reviews
All John Watson wanted to do was buy his semi-reclusive flatmate a cake after work, wish him well, and be done with it. Nice and simple.
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 3,964 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 6 - Follows: 4 - Published: 2/2/2013 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
The Boring and Mundane by Swirling Dreams reviews
The best times between John and Sherlock don't happen in the episodes. We never see them–they're much too dull. But sometimes, it's exactly what both of them want. (Series of one-shots, sometimes T rated sexy times, sometimes platonic friends).
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 31 - Words: 30,207 - Reviews: 168 - Favs: 140 - Follows: 197 - Updated: 2/1/2013 - Published: 1/23/2012 - Sherlock H., John W.
John Watson can deduce by Ertal77 reviews
"I just wanted to see Sherlock, clean of blood, eyes shut, and stroke his hair and tell him how much I already missed him. And then going back to my bed, cry a little and sleep. It wasn't a big deal." Pre-slash.
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Drama/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,575 - Reviews: 8 - Favs: 17 - Follows: 4 - Published: 1/31/2013 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Not Sorry, Just Grateful by DoctorWhobbit reviews
My version of John and Sherlock's reunion. Oneshot.
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,578 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 6 - Published: 1/30/2013 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Today, Of All Days by Karen Rhine reviews
January 29th; A strange meeting. On that day, something happened to John Watson. His whole life changed with one meeting. Now, all these years later, the meeting has changed into so much more. Little drabble I wrote today celebrating the anniversary of Sherlock and John meeting. Major fluff. Johnlock.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,504 - Reviews: 2 - Favs: 22 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/29/2013 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
All Is Calm In 221B by x.Aneo.x
John is shifting through his things went he comes across something that brings back a rush of memories. A little angsty, but happy ending. Can be Johnlock, but read normally too :) Better than I make it out to be
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,571 - Favs: 5 - Published: 1/29/2013 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
A New Kind of Sleeping Pill by ForeverShippingJohnlock reviews
John is awoken by another nightmare, only to discover that Sherlock's melodious voice works just as well as any sedative...
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,540 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 79 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 1/28/2013 - Published: 9/8/2012 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Until We Meet Again by Sandylee007 reviews
Suffering after the fall, John Watson comes up with a plan of his own to see Sherlock Holmes again. He only leaves behind a letter. ONLY SLASH IF YOU WANT TO TAKE IT AS SUCH ONESHOT
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Drama/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,504 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 31 - Follows: 3 - Published: 1/27/2013 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
The Unrelenting Hodge-Podge of Codswolloping Drivel by Cumberbatch Critter reviews
John and Sherlock aren't always on cases. Sometimes, they... they do normal things, like... go shopping or... hang out with John's friends... or, or... Well, they definitely aren't ALWAYS on cases... Oneshots looking into John and Sherlock's life, on various random topics.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,774 - Reviews: 56 - Favs: 42 - Follows: 55 - Updated: 1/23/2013 - Published: 11/10/2012 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
An Impromptu Concert by 5thvofvnovember reviews
Sherlock is considerate to John, for an evening.
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,775 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 1 - Published: 1/15/2013 - Sherlock H., John W.
Snow Days by kalimecat reviews
Thor remembers several times when he and Loki were younger and they played in the snow he thinks of what those times revealed to him about his younger brother
Thor - Rated: K - English - Family - Chapters: 14 - Words: 136,409 - Reviews: 104 - Favs: 130 - Follows: 89 - Updated: 1/12/2013 - Published: 7/18/2012 - Thor, Loki - Complete
Foggy London by BlooMist reviews
John gets home after a very nasty day and finds Sherlock particularly moody. After almost a week without decent sleep, John starts to question himself about some weird, lusty feelings towards the world's only Consulting Detective.
Sherlock - Rated: M - English - Romance/Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 14 - Words: 98,276 - Reviews: 185 - Favs: 261 - Follows: 379 - Updated: 12/29/2012 - Published: 11/14/2011 - Sherlock H., John W.
Feel the Tide by positivelymeteoric reviews
Things John Watson doesn't expect to do when he transfers to a new school: A. Befriend his possibly mad roommate. B. Investigate a particularly nasty streak of murders with his most likely mad roommate. C. Fall slightly or not so slightly in love with his definitely mad roommate. D. All of the above.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Mystery - Chapters: 14 - Words: 47,237 - Reviews: 219 - Favs: 448 - Follows: 199 - Updated: 10/6/2012 - Published: 6/21/2012 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
Hugs by fantasybean reviews
John needs a hug from Sherlock. These drabbles are SLASH- don't like it then don't read it. Johnlock.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 100 - Words: 113,964 - Reviews: 440 - Favs: 412 - Follows: 229 - Updated: 9/27/2012 - Published: 3/14/2012 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Date Blindness by Cheryl Dyson reviews
Harry thought he was perfectly happy until Hermione decided to set him up on a blind date. Mature adult content eventually.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 3 - Words: 24,673 - Reviews: 390 - Favs: 1,547 - Follows: 357 - Updated: 8/28/2012 - Published: 8/27/2012 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
John's Christmas Gift by siriusleeroy reviews
John receives a Christmas gift from Sherlock and is pleasantly surprised.
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Family - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,065 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 29 - Follows: 5 - Published: 7/17/2012 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Paper Cranes by Canute reviews
When they were children, Thor taught Loki how to make paper cranes. "When you manage to make a thousand," he said, "you get to make a wish that would come true, no matter what." Thor/Loki
Avengers - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,764 - Reviews: 50 - Favs: 347 - Follows: 70 - Published: 6/29/2012 - Thor, Loki - Complete
Thor's Brother by willshakespeare-immortalbard reviews
*Sequel to Odin's Son* Thor mourns for Loki and tries to find out if he's alive, while on Midgard Loki tries to return home. No pairings, just friendship for everything. Rated K-plus. Please read/review.
Thor - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Family - Chapters: 4 - Words: 2,414 - Reviews: 25 - Favs: 45 - Follows: 56 - Updated: 5/11/2012 - Published: 12/29/2011 - Thor, Loki
Turn by Sara's Girl reviews
One good turn always deserves another. Apparently. Epilogue compliant/AU. HPDM slash but some canon het along the way. Please trust me - I promise the epilogue will not bite you.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 14 - Words: 321,769 - Reviews: 1871 - Favs: 2,966 - Follows: 1,094 - Updated: 3/9/2012 - Published: 10/29/2010 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
And On To Something New by wincasters reviews
John's made a few friends in New Scotland Yard ever since Sherlock swirled into his life, which is precisely how he knows that everyone at the NSY is under the impression that he and Sherlock have been shagging for years.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,052 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 306 - Follows: 29 - Published: 3/6/2012 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Eight Days 'til Christmas by alljuststories reviews
Harry has lived throught eleven Christmases in all, and eight he could remember, but only one of them was merry. Series of oneshots. Canon.
Harry Potter - Rated: K - English - Chapters: 4 - Words: 1,729 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 2 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 2/4/2012 - Published: 12/17/2011 - Harry P. - Complete
We Go Anywhere But To The Ground by wincasters reviews
John's face crumples in on itself and the hurt that's been rattling around between his bones suddenly erupts into a painful bloom, and he falls. Sherlock Holmes, even in death, remains the only man capable of bringing John Watson to his knees.
Sherlock - Rated: M - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 25,571 - Reviews: 410 - Favs: 1,938 - Follows: 227 - Published: 2/1/2012 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
Occam's Razor by mattmetzger reviews
Jim is annoyed, McCoy's advice sucks, and Spock's been shut out. Sometimes the simplest solution is the right one. K/S, cliche fic.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,221 - Reviews: 31 - Favs: 136 - Follows: 12 - Published: 1/28/2012 - J. Kirk, Spock - Complete
Take The Pieces, Build Them Skyward by Handful of Silence reviews
It's never really worked out with anyone for John. Friends, family, lovers. Sherlock's never quite been in sync with anyone else either. Maybe that's why this time it's different. Sherlock/John.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 7,876 - Reviews: 27 - Favs: 134 - Follows: 9 - Published: 1/4/2012 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
Spock and Puns by MatchPlay reviews
Five times Spock makes a pun and the one time Jim understands.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,102 - Reviews: 3 - Favs: 60 - Follows: 5 - Published: 12/28/2011 - Spock, J. Kirk - Complete
Not the Slightest Folly by Lawliet's Angel reviews
"No, Sherlock," John interrupted. "I understand that it's a hedgehog. I'm thrilled that you've found something to talk to that actually has working ears. What I fail to comprehend is why you've chosen the animal equivalent of a cactus." Sherlock/John
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 5,603 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 152 - Follows: 18 - Published: 12/25/2011 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Never Ending Cycle by IronicNarwhal reviews
Or, four times Sherlock Holmes tried to propose to John Watson, one time he succeeded. Sherlock thinks he's a failure, John is confused, Mrs. Hudson and Lestrade give some bad advice, and Mummy saves the day. All in a lovely, fuffy holiday theme.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 18,256 - Reviews: 61 - Favs: 398 - Follows: 36 - Published: 12/25/2011 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
A Very Drarry Christmas by CaramelAriana reviews
Little drarry ficlets for the 25 days of Christmas. Full of good ole fashioned Christmas fluff.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 25 - Words: 24,868 - Reviews: 254 - Favs: 133 - Follows: 49 - Updated: 12/25/2011 - Published: 12/1/2011 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Odin's Son by willshakespeare-immortalbard reviews
The story of Thor and Loki's brotherhood, told in little stories about them. All in chronological order, though there are some flashbacks to scenes from earlier times. Please read/review! *Now complete.*
Thor - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Friendship - Chapters: 28 - Words: 16,045 - Reviews: 183 - Favs: 186 - Follows: 74 - Updated: 12/24/2011 - Published: 9/26/2011 - Thor, Loki - Complete
4 Times Sherlock Kissed John for Science by CKerased reviews
4 Times Sherlock Kissed John for Science, and 1 Time John Kissed Him. Sherlock convinces John to take place in a few kissing sessions... for science!
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 5 - Words: 7,719 - Reviews: 246 - Favs: 957 - Follows: 228 - Updated: 12/21/2011 - Published: 11/20/2011 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Two Little Boys by Alydia Rackham reviews
Based on the song "Two Little Boys." A mishap when Thor and Loki are little parallels dramatic events when they are grown. NO SLASH. Sad.
Thor - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Adventure - Chapters: 2 - Words: 5,275 - Reviews: 209 - Favs: 394 - Follows: 34 - Updated: 10/28/2011 - Published: 9/1/2011 - Thor, Loki - Complete
The Light by rewrittengirl reviews
I'll always follow him, through toast and jam, through fits of laughter to fits of tears. And no one calls my Sherlock a freak. / / Vignette, John's POV. A bittersweet look at how John sees Sherlock and their relationship.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,789 - Reviews: 22 - Favs: 64 - Follows: 6 - Published: 8/28/2011 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
His Favourite Four Letter F Words by cathedral carver reviews
John isn't the most eloquent of men.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,676 - Reviews: 51 - Favs: 263 - Follows: 19 - Published: 8/26/2011 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
Choices by DandalfTheWhite reviews
AU Fifth Year. Draco stops Harry in a hallway after a detention with Umbridge and their relationship slowly starts to change. Draco/Harry slash.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 30 - Words: 56,147 - Reviews: 460 - Favs: 1,144 - Follows: 578 - Updated: 8/20/2011 - Published: 5/28/2011 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Marry Me a Little by rewrittengirl reviews
No one can catch Sherlock Holmes, or so John thinks. Little does he know that someone might have caught the man's heart a long time ago... Fluff and Shwatsonlock.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,406 - Reviews: 24 - Favs: 117 - Follows: 15 - Published: 8/7/2011 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
Of Jumpers and Other Such Frivolities by sparklylulz reviews
In which John's favorite jumper goes repeatedly missing and the manner of how Sherlock became involved. -John/Sherlock
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,088 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 144 - Follows: 18 - Published: 7/27/2011 - [John W., Sherlock H.] - Complete
5 Times John Saw That It Was a Very Bad Idea by IShouldBeOverThis reviews
...Indeed To Keep Anything He Ever Wanted To See Again in the Pocket of the Blue Raincoat He Bought On Sale Last June, and One Memorable Time He Didn't ; cusp of relationship
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,253 - Reviews: 21 - Favs: 89 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/8/2011 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Reunion by movinggirl reviews
James and Lily Potter have had to learn everything about their son through people who have died and come Above. But after 100 long years on Earth, Harry's finally at the Gate. Now James and Lily will get to meet their son, for the very first time.
Harry Potter - Rated: K+ - English - Family/Angst - Chapters: 2 - Words: 8,963 - Reviews: 394 - Favs: 1,416 - Follows: 279 - Updated: 2/13/2011 - Published: 2/5/2011 - James P., Harry P. - Complete
Obvious Fact by MuseDePandora reviews
John knows he has an unusual relationship with his flatmate. He knows their friendship is complicated. And yes, he knows everyone assumes he's in a relationship with Sherlock Holmes. But he's not. Obviously. It's not like that. John would know. Right?
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 14,033 - Reviews: 1036 - Favs: 2,936 - Follows: 556 - Updated: 1/11/2011 - Published: 1/3/2011 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
The Actual Christmas Eve of Doctor John Watson by IShouldBeOverThis reviews
In which gifts are given, visits are made, food is eaten, things are revealed & Sherlock finally gets what he really wants for Christmas Inspired by 'that film.' Took the pieces, scrambled them up in a blender and ran them through a John shaped funnel.
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 6,342 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 164 - Follows: 12 - Published: 12/21/2010 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
The Lip-Lock Jinx by Cassis Luna reviews
It's a jinx that renders the victim mute, unless he/she serves the purpose of the jinx and kisses the person that they desire. It's just Harry's luck that he's in love with Draco. HPDM, oneshot, eighth year.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 21,436 - Reviews: 1001 - Favs: 7,903 - Follows: 1,223 - Published: 12/16/2010 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
On Subtlety by TheShoelessOne reviews
John/Sherlock. Sometimes, Sherlock Holmes can be spectacularly ignorant.
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,392 - Reviews: 57 - Favs: 340 - Follows: 29 - Published: 12/2/2010 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Sharing John by grannysknitting reviews
Sherlock had never been an only child, but from his behaviour you wouldn't know it. What happens when he realises that John has more than one friend, that other people admire the same qualities Sherlock does?
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,398 - Reviews: 38 - Favs: 286 - Follows: 23 - Published: 11/8/2010 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
Of Doctors and Detectives by solauzish reviews
Sherlock/John drabbles.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 7,056 - Reviews: 106 - Favs: 165 - Follows: 153 - Updated: 11/7/2010 - Published: 8/14/2010 - Sherlock H., John W.
The One Where John Goes On Conference by Jennistar1 reviews
John goes on conference to get away from Sherlock, but that's never going to be easy now, is it? Friendship fic!
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Friendship/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,180 - Reviews: 58 - Favs: 346 - Follows: 31 - Published: 10/27/2010 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
How to Entertain your Cellmate by InsaneMelon reviews
One-Shot: Sherlock finally crosses the line and now he and John have to spent the night in a jail cell. John is annoyed while Sherlock's bored with nothing to entertain him - except his fellow cellmate of course... SLASH Sherlock/John
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,104 - Reviews: 86 - Favs: 558 - Follows: 62 - Published: 10/4/2010 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
I'm Lost Without My Blogger! by Immyy reviews
Sherlock makes John breakfast.
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,098 - Reviews: 9 - Favs: 40 - Follows: 6 - Published: 9/15/2010 - Sherlock H., John W.
Five Times John Caught Sherlock Cuddling by ZannaBQ reviews
... And One Time He Participated J/S, fluff
Sherlock - Rated: K - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,476 - Reviews: 44 - Favs: 521 - Follows: 53 - Published: 9/4/2010 - John W., Sherlock H. - Complete
Chow Mein, Deductions and Realisations by Jennistar1 reviews
Written for a kinkmeme prompt. Sherlock makes deductions about a loved up couple nearby. John realises it sounds exactly like them. S/J
Sherlock - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,185 - Reviews: 257 - Favs: 1,554 - Follows: 193 - Published: 8/23/2010 - Sherlock H., John W.
The 3 Stages of Friendship by Jennistar1 reviews
Or: 3 ways Sherlock and John realised what friendship was. CHAPTER 3 UP. NOW FINISHED.
Sherlock - Rated: K+ - English - Hurt/Comfort - Chapters: 3 - Words: 3,714 - Reviews: 158 - Favs: 754 - Follows: 112 - Updated: 8/21/2010 - Published: 8/11/2010 - Sherlock H., John W. - Complete
It's Not A Love Potion by CrystalP734 reviews
"Now, lust potions develop feelings of desire in the taker without the affection that a love potion gives, so Malfoy, you will find that you continue to see Potter as the insufferable twit that he is." Slash. Not HBP/DH compliant.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 16 - Words: 68,145 - Reviews: 1016 - Favs: 3,754 - Follows: 906 - Updated: 5/16/2010 - Published: 2/20/2010 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
On a Clear Day by Sara's Girl reviews
Draco Malfoy is waiting for his real life to begin, and it appears that he's not the only one. Coffee, charity, and the wisdom of the elderly. HPDM. Oneshot of epic proportions.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Friendship - Chapters: 1 - Words: 43,663 - Reviews: 407 - Favs: 1,897 - Follows: 147 - Published: 1/22/2010 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Draco Malfoy, It's Your Lucky Day by faithwood reviews
Even though he's unarmed, injured, lost in the Forbidden Forest, and facing a possible murder charge, Draco Malfoy gets lucky. HPDM. SLASH. Hogwarts fic. Written for the Harry/Draco Holidays Fest on Live Journal as a gift for the lovely Aja. Complete.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance/Adventure - Chapters: 1 - Words: 38,929 - Reviews: 388 - Favs: 2,098 - Follows: 249 - Published: 1/18/2010 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete
Talk to Me by Sara's Girl reviews
When the usual channels of communication are shut down, the most surprising people can find a way in. A strange little love story. HPDM slash, AU 7th-year fluffy!verse.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Hurt/Comfort/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 16,550 - Reviews: 509 - Favs: 2,524 - Follows: 273 - Published: 9/25/2009 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
Four Vulcan Words Plus One by cestmoi01 reviews
Four Vulcan Words Spock Taught to Captain James T. Kirk and the One He Didn't . The story of Jim Kirk's life aboard the Enterprise and his relationship with Spock in five words. TOS, xi influences; character death; mild K/S. Spoilers for "The Menagerie."
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: K - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,040 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 95 - Follows: 6 - Published: 6/6/2009 - Spock, J. Kirk
Verbal JumpRope by Keshka reviews
K/S slash. AU. At the end of the movie, the older Spock did not seek out his younger self and encourage him to stay on the Enterprise. It falls to Jim to convince him. In other words, how to outfox a fox, when the fox is a Vulcan.
Star Trek: 2009 - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,633 - Reviews: 59 - Favs: 424 - Follows: 34 - Published: 5/17/2009 - J. Kirk, Spock - Complete
Must Love Quidditch by dracosoftie reviews
Through a series of emails from an online dating site, Harry thinks he's found his perfect match. Will the bond they've forged survive after their identities are revealed? H/D. Warnings for slash, language and explicit sexual content.
Harry Potter - Rated: M - English - Romance - Chapters: 30 - Words: 107,542 - Reviews: 3595 - Favs: 6,366 - Follows: 1,340 - Updated: 2/2/2009 - Published: 12/19/2008 - Harry P., Draco M. - Complete
A Little Too Literally by Katria Bloom reviews
H/D, Harry and Draco have to buy each other gifts for a Secret Santa exchange. Wackiness ensues.
Harry Potter - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,930 - Reviews: 87 - Favs: 312 - Follows: 41 - Published: 1/12/2008 - Draco M., Harry P. - Complete