Taken from Pudgypudge

The Cliche Rant--Will Be Added to as Necessity Dictates (Whenever I Get Pissed Off at Something Stupid)

You know, there are just some things in the realm of Naruto fanfiction that need to go away. There are some cliches that need to go bye-bye. You know which ones they are, I know which ones they are, we all know which ones they are. I'm speaking, of course, about the cliches as old as fanfiction itself.

The Mask--This cliche needs to disappear from the vocabulary of all fanfiction writers. Naruto is a certified idiot, folks. If you want to portray him as smarter than he is, then by all means do so. Just don't say he 'hides behind a mask of stupidity'. It's old, it's gaudy, it's got to go. There should be no place anymore for this phrase.

Precious People--This one is almost as bad as the Mask. For the love of God, people, do you not have access to other forms of this phrase? Call them his beloved friends, his loved ones, ANYTHING but Precious People. Every time I see this phrase (and I know that earlier on I was guilty of it as well) I get the urge to kill. Please, get a thesaurus.

Sakura-chan tried to kill me so I ran off--Please, please, please, be more inventive than that. The bitch wouldn't do that. And if she would, then build it up to that. Spontaneous homicide because your teammate didn't bring your bishonen back just isn't realistic, no matter how grief stricken you are. Find a better reason.

The Council--Ok, I'm guilty of this as well at times. I admit it. But I'm trying to give reasons for everything. In truth, there really isn't a Council. It's a plot device made for fanfiction because they're an evil entity out to get our boy. And that's fine. But not everyone is out to get Naruto. Again, you need motive.

Self-placement in a story--No, just...no, ok? Don't do it. It's not cool. You're not a ninja, you never will be a ninja, and if you feel the need to write that you could be a ninja in the Naruto world, please, drink some whiskey and rub that shit out.

Flamers--Yes, they are a cliche. Yes, they should go away. Their parents never told them about the 'if you don't have anything nice to say' rule. It doesn't apply to constructive criticism, it just applies to being an asshole.

Bad Grammar--Come on, folks. Is it really that hard to write at at least a high-school level? Sound out what you've written and see if it sounds right. If it sounds like something that your three year old brother just babbled while he was shitting himself...don't put it up. Find a Beta Reader. There are people out there who are willing to help. And Remember...Huk-ed on Puh-honics wukked fuh may!

Abandoned Fics--You know who you are...you rat bastards...

Cookie-Cutter Canon Complacency--Everyone is guilty of this. Everyone at some point in their Fanfiction career. But that does not mean that you should not diverge at some point. I won't begrudge anyone for sticking close on their first fic. But if you have the imagination and you have the ability, it is absolutely CRIMINAL if you don't put that brain of yours to use.

Harems--Now, this one is a little touchy, I know. But seriously, folks, not every chick is interested in the same guy. And most girls aren't willing to share. Deal with it. Harems are a fun part of reading, but they can get old after a while, unless done tastefully. You build up an immunity to them...like porn...

Using Leet Speak or IM speak in a fic--I will fucking stab you through the computer screen! NO, people, just NO! Stop murdering the English language!

Misspelling Words That You Should Know--It's not Kanaha, Kohana, Kahono...it's KONOHA! This pisses me off so much. How can you read something over and over and still get the name of a person or place wrong? It doesn't even sound right! I can understand the swapping of letters because you're writing fast, but come on, every time you write something? That's like Naturo talking to Kakishi about Sasugay and Sukaru's love affair. See how annoying that was? DON'T DO IT!

Sasugay/Sas-uke--Seriously, the joke is old. It was funny when I first started reading fanfiction, but now it's juvenile and just plain annoying. Now when I see this I roll my eyes. If you're trying to be clever and poke fun at a character's seemingly hidden closet case of being gay, then do so in an original way. Use your head and put him in a situation where it's funny. Saying "Sasugay, you're gay. Your name even says it" isn't funny.

Trying to Rush an Author--Hey, guess what? Authors don't like to be told what to do. And telling an author to, and I quote, "Hurry up with the next chapter" is tantamount to an insult. This is free literature and everyone does this for fun. Fanfiction takes a backseat to Real Life. Get used to it. Sit down, shut up, hold on, and enjoy the ride. Wise words.

These are a few of my favorite things...not. Seriously, folks, there are just some things that can kill a story for me. I'll try to keep reading, but even I have to admit that it's hard at times. I try to be original, all I ask is that everyone else try too. Cliches sometimes are unavoidable, but some...just try, okay? Thank you.