---

Hi Vampire Weekend

If you think your going go on a mass killing if you read another story where Hermione becomes

A) Slut

B) Emo

C) A girly girl

or

D) all of the above

put this on ur page

If you throw a fit when someone says the Twilight characters aren't real, copy this into your profile.

If you are so obsessed with Twilight it isn't even funny anymore, copy this into your profile.

If you want Bella to become a vampire, copy this into your profile .

If you cried when Edward left Bella in New Moon copy this into your profile.

If you went to sleep around 2 A.M. reading Twilight, New Moon, or Eclipse, copy and paste this into your profile.

AV is Addicted to Vampires.

AACIBD is Addicted to all Cullen's Including Bella Disorder.

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile)

If you are absolutely in love with Stephenie Meyer's fictional character Edward, from twilight, copy and paste this into your profile

If people mistake you for a vampire (coughcoughIamonecoughcough)...copy and paste this onto your profile

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you like the book Invisible Monsters copy and paste this into your profile.

If you saw Robert Pattinson's movie The Haunted Airman and love it copy and paste this into your profile.

---

10 Commandments of a Teenager

1) Thou shall not sneak out when parents are sleeping.
(why wait that long)
2) Thou shall not do drugs.
(alcohol lasts longer, not to mention being cheaper.)
3) Thou shall not steal from K-Mart.
(Walmart has a bigger selection)
4) Thou shall not be arrested for vandalism.
(destruction has a bigger effect, I can tell you all about this)
5) Thou shall not steal from your parents.
(everyone knows grandma has more money)
6) Thou shall not get into fights.
(Cat fight anyhow...just start them.)
7) Thou shall not skip class.
(just take the whole day off)
8) Thou shall not strip in class.
(Hooters pays more)
9) Thou shall not think about having sex.
(like Nike says, "just do it")
10) Thou shall not help old ladies across the street.
(just leave'm in the middle)

If you love Twilight so much that you're thinking about making a shrine for it, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you love EMMETT and/or Edward and/or Jasper so much, but you would never write a story with them falling for you just 'cause you think it makes FanFiction more like Freak-Of-Nature-Fiction, copy and paste this onto your profile, and put the twilight guy (above) on caps lock so everyone knows your obsession.

If before you read Twilight, you thought it was going to be a corny book, but after you read it you fell in love with it and all of its characters, copy and paste this onto your profile.

Awesome Quotes:

Get home before dark.

Love is immortal

Buffy lives.

What is it about dangerous women?

In every generation, there is a chosen one. She alone shall stand against the vampires, demons, and forces of darkness. She is the Slayer.

Fight evil, bring Buffy home.

Pike: Buffy, you're the guy. You are the chosen guy.
Buffy: Right. I'm the chosen one. And I choose to be shopping.

Buffy: My secret weapon is PMS.

Amilyn: We're immortal, Buffy. We can do anything.
Buffy: Oh yeah? Clap.

-Boys in books...are just better-

-I have more fictional boyfriends than you do. Beat that!-

If the grass is greener on the other side, you can bet the water bill is higher.

Basic Definitions of Science: If it's green or wiggles, it's biology. If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it doesn't work, it's physics.

You know it's going to be a bad day when you jump out of bed and miss the floor.

The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they are okay, then it's you.

The problem with America is stupidity. I'm not saying there should be a capital punishment for stupidity, but why don't we just take the safety labels off of everything and let the problem solve itself?

The reason grandparents and grandchildren get along so well is that they have a common enemy.

Amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic.

My friends are the type of people who would try to drown a fish, but I love them anyway.

-It's not about right. It's not about wrong. It's about power- (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

-She's like a woman fighting for more than life. She fights like fighting is her life. It is the air she breathes, and she knows she will win because...there is no alternative- (Buffy the Vampire Slayer)

-The hardest thing in this world is to live in it- (Buffy)

Officer, I swear to Drunk I'm not God!

Come to the dark side. We have COOKIES!

I smile because I have no idea what's going on!

Ever stop to think and forget to start again?

Therapist = The/rapist... scary thought

It's always the last place you look...of course it is, why the hell would I keep looking after I found it?

They say, "Guns don't kill people, people kill people." Well I think the guns help. If you stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill to many people.

When you get caught looking at him, just remember, he was looking back.

Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean that they're not out to get you.

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.

I've got things to break, people to laugh at, objects to drool over and who knows what else.

Boys are like trees-they take 50 years to grow up.

Life isn't passing me by; it's trying to run me over.

Having the love of your life say you can still be friends is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

You say I'm not cool. But cool is another word for cold. If I'm not cold, I'm hot. I know I'm hot. Thanks for embracing it.

I'm so gangster, I carry a squirt gun.

When it rains on my party, I bust out the slip n' slide.

I don't obsess! I think intensely.

Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?

Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures’?

Why is it that some products you have to turn it upside down to read the directions, and the directions say do not turn upside down?

Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask, "Where have I gone wrong?" Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night."

The buddy system is essential to survival; it gives the enemy somebody else to shoot at.

Education is important; school however, is another matter.

Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them more

Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, and then kill them.

Boys are like purses: cute, full of crap, and always replaceable.

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.

Evening News is where they begin with "Good Evening" then proceed to tell you why it isn't.

Don't follow in my footsteps; I tend to walk into walls.

I am on a quest to the deepest, darkest corners of my room in search of what some would call "a floor" - a long and difficult task awaits me. Wish me luck my friends for I may not return alive.

Flying is simple. Just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Don’t knock on death’s door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then sit back and let the world wonder how you did it.

When life gives you lemons, throw them back and demand Edward

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill themselves, is it considered a hostage situation?

"The dinosaurs extinction wasn't an accident. Barney came and they all committed suicide."

Copying from a single source is called plagiarism, copying from multiple source is called research.

I hear voices, and they don't like you.

Is it possible to scream at the bottom of your lungs?

whenever you see or hear the brand "Volvo" you freak out, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If whenever you see or hear the name "Edward" you freak out, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are absolutely in love with Edward Cullen, no matter how much he overreacts no matter how much he gets overprotective, you will love him anyway, then copy this into your profile

If you love Alice and Emmett Cullen, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have read every single book at least ten times copy and paste this into your profile (Hah! I'm very proud of this one)

Breaking Dawn SPOILERIFIC SUMMARY:

- Bella, the human, and Edward, the vampire, get married.

- Then they have rough sex that leaves her bruised and battered. (Also, he bites a pillow and covers her with feathers.)

- Then she gets totally pregnant with some kind of demon death baby who grows at a superhuman rate, can read thoughts in the womb, drinks blood in utero, and breaks Bella's ribs, pelvis, and spine from the inside.

- Some werewolf stuff happens and Jacob (20 year old werewolf) falls in love with the tiny demon death baby which sparked many confused and slightly disturbed comments and thoughts in readers around the country.

- The baby is delivered via Cesarean section, which is a polite way of saying that other characters rip Bella's stomach open with their teeth. ("Seriously, they cannot make this into a movie. I cannot imagine for one second how they could make this into a movie appropriate for teenage girls and keep this part in it.")

- Bella becomes a vampire and develops superpowers and has sex with Edward a lot of times.

- Everybody lives happily forever after.

The book does however leave one major unanswered question: What's it like doing it with the undead? "Was it like fucking a popsicle?" Alas, we'll never know.

The book was met with an awful response from the fans and motions to return every copy have been put in place.

After I read Breaking Dawn, I returned it. It was awful and slightly

By Please make the screaming stop

---

"So, nobody’s tried to kill me lately," "I’m truly happy to hear that. Wish I could say the same for me."

..Dream As If You'll Live Forever .. Live As If You'll Die Tomorrow..

I always believed that fear belonged to other people. Weaker people. It never touched me. And then it did. And when it touches you, you know... that it's been there all along. Waiting beneath the surfaces of everything you loved.

There is no going back, to that other person, that other place. This thing, this stranger, she is all you are now.

I know you're scared. Don't be. 'Cause the world really is beautiful.

Love is watching someone die

A promise made to a dying man, a girl with nothing left to lose, and a love that won’t die. She learns that you can’t live your life in mgourning. You have to live your life, or die from it.

‘Sometimes if you really listen hard, you can almost hear it, that moment your life changes. Forever.’

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue,
Say one Word, And I'll kill You,
Flowers are Pretty, Weeds are Not,
Life and Death, Have always Fought

I learns why people who have been hurt are so dangerous: Because they know they can survive.

you think your lonely but i just shot my boyfriend

DON'T HIT KIDS

. No seriously, they have guns now!AND I JUST HAVE TO PUT THIS HERE
:'D Like the best comment I've ever had... :'DDD

"Sake= 15.00
Cruise Ship Tickets= 75.00 each
Evening Outfit= 30.00
Waking Up Naked Next To Your Cousin= Priceless" (

"The strongest piece of glass I’ve ever seen: So tough but so fragile."

"Yeah. You said ‘Cullen! Did you just hear a word I was saying’",

future Jackass member!