Saw these on another profile and couldn't resist.

Funny Things!

16 THINGS TO DO AT WAL-MART from KuroTenshi666 account!

1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares"... and see what happens.

5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.

6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are.

11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme song.

12. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream.. "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"

15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!

16. Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"

Repost this if you laughed... Or are planning to do any of these things

How You Know You’re Addicted to Yaoi/Slash

1. You start mentally pairing up random guys on the street.

2. You wish you had gay friends just so you could perve on them kissing their boyfriends.

3. You don’t remember the last time you read a heterosexual fanfiction.

4. You have developed a sexual fetish for handcuffs, leather and BDSM.

5. If you are a heterosexual girl, you keep trying to seme your boyfriend, despite the fact that you don’t have the necessary parts.

6. You suddenly become interested in gay rights, thinking this will increase your opportunities for voyeristic activities.

7. You try to get your friends into it, simply so you can talk to them about it without them getting that bored look on their face.

8. You keep lying about the number of hours you spend each day on the computer reading slash fanfiction, watching yaoi anime etc.

9. The most exiting moment of your life so far was when you discovered hentai manga.

10. You celebrate turning 18 not because you can watch R movies, but because you’re old enough to watch movies with explicit gay sex scenes.

11. It’s the only aphrodesiac you need.

12. When your boyfriend tells you he’s gay and has been dating another man, you immediately ask if you can join in.

13. Your gay son wishes he had a normal, homophobic mother who didn’t ask him questions about his latest sexual exploits

Human Stupidity

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (and that's the only
time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Fritos: ..You could be a winner! No purchase
necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special of the day)

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that
would be...how, exactly?)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but,
it's "just" a suggestion).

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside
down." (Hmm...a bit late to tell me now!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought it would be iced over, or something?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate
machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce
the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those
5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (I never would have guessed...)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(Aww, and after all the trouble NASA went to to buy these so we could decorate our space-shuttle for Christmas...)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Wow...talk about a news flash!)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not
enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

Only in America! (I'm allowed to, I'm a citizen xD)

1. Only in America...can a pizza get to your house faster than an
ambulance.

2. Only in America...are there handicap parking places in front
of a skating rink.

3. Only in America...do drugstores make the sick walk all the
way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people
can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America...do people order double cheeseburgers, large
fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America...do banks leave both doors open and then chain
the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of
dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen
calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns
in packages of eight.

9. Only in America...do we use the word 'politics' to describe the
process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning
'bloodsucking creatures'.

10. Only in America...do they have drive-up ATM machines with
Braille lettering.

You're a 90's kid if:

You can finish this 'ice ice _'
You remember watching Doug, Ren & Stimpy, Pinky and the Brain, Bobby's World, Felix the cat, The Tick...AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!
You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"
You just cant resist finishing this . . . "Iiiiiiin west philidelphia born and raised . . ."
You remember TGIF, Step by Step, Family Matters, Dinosaurs, and Boy Meets World.
You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.
You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.
You remember reading "Goosebumps"
You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.
You still get the urge to say "NOT" after (almost) every sentence . . . not
If you remember seeing hot tub bubbles make bubbly sounds before every music video on VH1.
when everything was settled by rock paper scissors..or bubble gum bubble gum in a dish...eeny meeny miney mo...and even better daddy had a donkey inky binky bonky.
You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time.
"Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?" was both a game and a TV game show.
Captain Planet. He's a Hero.
You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green ranger, were meant to be together.
You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genisis became popular.
You always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos . . . but never taped anything funny.
You remember watching Home Alone 1, 2 , and 3 . . . and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"
You remember watching The Magic School Bus, Wishbone, and Reading Rainbow on PBS.
You remember when Yo-Yos were cool.
You remember those Where's Waldo books.
You remember eating Warheads.
You remember watching the 1st Batman, Aladdin, Ninja Turtles, and 3 Ninjas movies.
You remember Ring Pops.
You remember drinking Surge, and Tang.
If you remember when every thing was "da BOMB!"
When they made the new lunchables so that you could make pizza AND tacos.
You remember boom boxes vs. cd players.
Making those little paper cootie-catcher things, and then predicting your life with them.
You played and/or collected "Pogs"
You had at least one Tamagotchi, GigaPet, or Nano and brought it everywhere.

. . . Furbies

You haven't always had a computer, and it was cool to have the internet.
And Windows 95 was the best.
You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers, and Ninja Turtles.
Michael Jordan was a king.
All your school supplies were "Lisa Frank" brand.
You remember when the new Beanie Babies and Talking Elmo were always sold out.
You collected those Beanie Babies.
Carebears
Lambchop's song never ended.
The old dollar bills.
Silver dollars, which were cool to have.
You remember a time before the WB.
You collected all the Troll dolls
If you even know what an original walkman is.
You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"
You know the Macarena by heart.
"Talk to the hand" . . . nough said
You always said, "Then why don't you marry it?!"
You remember trying to collect all 150 original pokemon cards but never could and if you did you thought you were all that!
You remember Highlight's magazine.
You went to McDonald's to play in the playplace.
You remember playing on merry go rounds at the playground.
Before the MySpace frenzy . . .
Before the Internet & text messaging . . .
Before Sidekicks & iPods . . .
Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX . . .
Before Spongebob . . .
Back when you put off the 5 hours of homework you had every night.
When light up sneakers were cool.
When you rented VHS tapes, not DVDs.
When gas was 0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was The new thing.
When we recorded stuff on VCRs.
When gameboy was a brick.
You did MASH to figure out your future
Way back.
Before we realized all this would eventually disappear.
Who would have thought you'd miss the 90's so much!!
Post this in your profile if you remember these days . . . .
or if you smiled at one of these things.