Heey! :D

I'm Emma, I live in England- Some scummy little town in Kent (We're overrun by chavs) :0

Fanfiction makes my life generally a lot easier because I can get away from my everyday life of suckish coursework and evil teachers who make you memerise a 200 word essay :l

I write for Harry Potter but I write for Twilight as well sometimes ;) I might start writing for glee if I get the chance sometime soon!!

---

50 Things I Am Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts

I will not poke Hufflepuffs with spoons, nor will I insist that their House colors indicate that they are "covered in bees".

No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can do, I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class.

Growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is not "an extra credit project for Herbology".

"I've heard every possible joke about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge.

I am not allowed to attempt to breed a liger.

I will not go to class skyclad.

The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball.

I will not use Umbridge's quill to write "I told you I was hardcore".

I will stop referring to showering as "giving Moaning Myrtle an eyeful".

Polishing my wand in the common room is acceptable. "Polishing my wand" in the common room is not.

If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.

House elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers.

Starting a betting pool on the fate of this year's Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher is tasteless and tacky, not a clever money-making concept.

I will not start every Potions class by asking Professor Snape if today's project is suitable for use as a sexual lubricant.

Adding the name "Bueller" to Professor Binns' roster is not funny.

"Springtime for Voldemort" is not an acceptable suggestion for the class play.

Seamus Finnegan is not "after me Lucky Charms".

I will not refer to the Weasley twins as "bookends".

I will not refer to the Patil twins as "bookends".

The Slytherin prefect is named Draco Malfoy, not "Rocky Horror."

It is exceptionally tasteless to tell Professor Lupin that "Once you go Black, you never go back.

"I will not call Lucius Malfoy "Jareth".

I will not bring a Magic Eight Ball to Divination class.

I am not to refer to the Potions classroom as "Kitchen Stadium".

I will not tell Ron and Hermione to "Get a room" whenever they start to fight.

The Forbidden Forest is forbidden for a reason.

I am not a tribble Animagus.

I am allowed to have a toad, rat, cat, or owl.

I am not allowed to have a reticulated python, snow leopard, Tasmanian devil, or piranha.

I do not weigh the same as a duck.

Remus Lupin does not want a flea collar.

Sirius Black is not #24601.

I will not lick Trevor.

I will stop asking the Arithmancy teacher what the square root of -1 is.

I am not being repressed.

Calling Lucius Malfoy "Luscious Mouthful" is just plain gross.

I will not change the password to the prefects' bath to "Makes getting clean almost as much fun as getting dirty".

There is no such thing as an Invisibility Thong.

I am not a Pinball Wizard.

Asking "How do you keep a Gryffindor in suspense?" and walking away is only funny the first time.

I will not offer to pose nude for Colin Creevey.

I will not offer to pose nude for Dean Thomas.

It is a bad idea to tell Professor Snape he takes himself too seriously.

It is a bad idea to tell Professor McGonagall she takes herself too seriously.

Sir Cadogan is not one of the knights who say "NI".

I will not offer to prepare tandoori owl.

I will stop asking when we will learn to make "Love Potion Number Nine".

I will not ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick.

I will not greet Professor McGonagall with "What's new, pussycat?"

There is not now, nor has there ever been, a fifth House at Hogwarts, and I am not a member of that house, nor am I its founder.I will not take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.

---

Each Harry Potter quote on this page is loaded with wisdom and wit. You will admire every Harry Potter quote on this page regardless of the context and the author. Read each quote and ruminate over its meaning.

Dumbledore
I will only truly have left this school none here are loyal to me... Help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it.

Arthur Weasley
Never trust anything that can think for itself, if you can't see where it keeps its brain.

Sirius Black
You should have died! Died rather than betray your friends, as we would have done for you!

Dumbledore
Remember Cedric. Remember, if the time should come when you have to make a choice between what is right and what is easy, remember what happened to a boy who was good, and kind, and brave, because he strayed across the path of Lord Voldemort. Remember Cedric Diggory.

Dumbledore
I don't need a cloak to become invisible.

Dumbledore
Your mother died to save you. If there is one thing Voldemort can't understand, its love.

Harry
I don't go looking for trouble. Trouble usually finds me.

Moody
'Course Dumbledore trusts you. He's a trusting man, isn't he? Believes in second chances. But me, I say there are spots that don't come off, Snape. Spots that never come off, know what I mean?

---

AccioCharmSummons an objectAlohomoraCharmOpens locked objectsApareciumSpellReveals invisible inkAvada KadavraCurseMurders opponent UnforgivableAviforsCharmTurns small objects into birds.AvisSpellLaunches birds from your wand--CrucioCurseTortures opponent UnforgivableConfundusCharmUsed to confuse opponentConjunctivitisCurseDamages opponents eyesight--DeletriusSpellCounters "Prior Incatato"DensaugeoSpellEnlarges TeethDiffindoSpellSplits seamsDissendiumSpellOpens "One eyed witch" hump--EngorgioCharmEnlarges and itemEnnervateSpellCounters StupefyExpecto PatronumCharmCreates a PatronusExpelliarmusCharmDisarms your opponent--FerulaSpellCreates bandagesFideliusCharmHides a secret within someoneFinite IncantatumSpellStops any current spellsFlipendoJinxKnocks an object backwardsFurnunculusCurseProduces boils on opponent--HomorphusCharmLockhart's Werewolf "cure"--ImmobulusCharmRenders target immobile.ImpedimentaCharmSlows an advancing objectImperioCurseControls a person UnforgivableImperviusCharmMakes an object repel waterIncendioSpellStarts a fire--LegilimensSpellAllows the caster to delve into the mind of the victimLocomotor MortisCurseLocks opponents legsLumosSpellCreates light at wand tip--MobiliarbusCharmMoves objects with wandMobilicorpusSpellMoves unconscious bodiesMorsmordeSpellConjures the Dark Mark--NoxSpellCounter to Lumos--ObliviateCharmErases memoriesOrchideousSpellConjures a bunch of flowers--Petrificus TotalusSpellBody - BindPoint MeCharmWand acts like a compassPriori IncantatumSpellResult when brother wands duelPrior IncantatoSpellReveals a wands last spell / castProtegoCharmCause spells to reflect back to the sender. --QuietusSpellCounter spell for Sonorus--ReducioSpellReturns items to original size. Counters EngorgioReductoSpellBlasts solid objects asideRelashioSpellReleases user from bindingRepairoSpellRepairs ThingsRictusempraCharmTickles opponentRiddikulusSpellUse this spell and laugh to defeat a boggart--ScrugeCharmDestroys ectoplasm (remains of ghosts)SerpensortiaSpellProduces SnakeSonorusSpellAmplifies voiceStupefySpellKnocks out opponent--TarantallegraSpellForces opponent to dance--WaddiwasiSpellUnsticks an objectWingardium LeviosaCharmMakes on object fly